A.N Sorry for any spelling errors.

Detonate

Santana stumbled backwards hitting the door roughly, her eyes shutting quickly. She let out a low moan at the contact of the long missed lips. Santana swiftly caught up to Brittany's feverish lips, clutching her blond hair, clumping it into her fist.

Brittany didn't waste time, needing this, needing Santana she had needed her all this time. She skipped her tongue out, asking for that silent permission. Santana obliged opening her mouth; she couldn't believe this was happening right now.

She could not get enough of Brittany. She would not take one moment of this for granted because who the hell knew how long it would be until she could be with Brittany this way again. She brought Brittany's lower lip into her own, nibbling on it, letting it go with a low pop. Brittany groaned, running her body harder against Santana. Santana ranked her hands down Brittany's sides moving up and down, pulling her closer with each stroke.

Both girls were struggling with the lack of oxygen, their tongues and bodies battling for control. Finally Brittany pulled away, moving her lips along Santana's jaw line, to her neck. Santana gasped, grabbing Brittany's blonde hair in her right hand, leaning back her head onto the back of the door, allowing Brittany further access of her neck.

Brittany skipped her tongue along her dark skin, sucking on her pulse point, causing Santana to shiver, her chest rising and falling in strenuous efforts. Brittany ran her teeth along her skin, grabbing Santana's hips, bunching her shirt in her fists.

"Brittany," Santana groaned, no one had this effect on her, Brittany was the only person who could make Santana loose such control over herself, that made her feel comfortable enough to let her lustful desires take complete control.

Brittany hummed, dragging her tongue back up her neck to her lips, where she once again excitedly attacked her now swollen lips. Brittany pushed her leg forward, finding the crease between Santana's legs pushing forward up into Santana's hot center.

"Shit," Santana mumbled around Brittany's lips, Brittany grinned, grabbing Santana's wrists and holding them above the Latina's head completely dominating her.

Santana knew this time was not supposed to be gentle or loving, it was supposed to be finally a release to everything they had been desperately holding in for so long. Santana pushed forward, grinding down roughly onto Brittany's leg, letting out a staggered breath.

Brittany dropped Santana's arms, grazing her nails down her length, starting at the collar bone across her chest and down to the hem of her shirt, snaking her hand underneath. Santana shuttered, tilting her head to deepen their kiss. Brittany spread her palm trying to take as much tanned skin as she could, tracing the lines on her skin she had memorized a while back. Santana bit her lip when she began to graze north, her breath shaking.

It had been too long, so long since she had felt Brittany's hands, her lips, her heat, everything. Santana felt her nerves jump from her skin when Brittany's hand casually poked at the lace bra, her hips jerking forwards.

Brittany took it as an invitation, moving her hands the rest of the way and cupping Santana under her shirt, slowly moving her breast in her palms through her thin bra. Brittany looked down watching as her hands made two bulges in Santana's shirt, moving around her breast.

"Holly fu-" Santana tried to wheeze but Brittany's lips crashed back on hers, Santana in response let out a loud and raged moan, which Brittany swallowed.

"Brittany!" A loud voice shouted,

Santana shut her eyes tightly hooping that the bubble from reality that they had created would protect them from their intruder. But unfortunately it didn't and Brittany's hands were retracting from Santana under her shirt. Santana let out a gasp shooting her hands up and gripping Brittany's hands through her shirt, keeping her still.

"Don't," Santana chocked,

"You know we can't stay," Brittany muttered trying to move her hands again, only to her dismay as Santana gripped them firmly through the cotton fabric.

"You can't leave me like this," Santana whined, "I have waited for too long," Brittany watched Santana, her blue eyes flickering between the girls eyes.

"Brittany!" the voice called again, this time Santana could make out that it was wheels himself. Are you fucking kidding, she finally had Brittany, finally was able to hold her again and who was going to interrupt them but wheels himself, there was something wrong with the world.

"Don't leave," Santana pleaded her voice breaking, could she really deal with another rejection? She was not only talking about leaving the bathroom but something larger then that, that day when Brittany rejected her she left her also, they didn't hang out after that. Santana couldn't handle that right after she had finally begun to build a friendship back up with Brittany that would come crashing down after today.

"I'm not leaving," Brittany whispered,

"You left before," Santana snapped, "How I can be sure it won't happen again."

"You pushed me away," Brittany muffled, "It's not that easy,"

"Why can't it be?" Santana hissed, "I am in love with you Brittany,"

"Me too," Brittany mumbled.

"Are you even in love with him?" She sighed.

"Of course," Brittany slurred

"Are you sure?" Santana asked, "Can you look me in the eye and say that you are in love with Artie?"

Brittany looked up, her lips pushed together in a tight line, "I-I'm…" Brittany stuttered "I'm in l-love with Artie."

"Bull shit," Santana growled, "You wouldn't be here right now if you were."

"You can't tell me how I feel," Brittany whispered.

"Do you feel that?" Santana grumbled, pressing down on Brittany' hand onto her chest, "You make my heart go crazy,"

"Brittany are you up there?" Artie yelled.

"Yeah be right there!" Brittany shouted over Santana's shoulder,

"Don't leave me Brittany," Santana mumbled, "Please."

"I have to go," Brittany muttered, finally pulling her hand from Santana, "They will be waiting on me,"

"I won't wait forever Brittany,"

"Obviously,"

"What does that mean" Santana said shocked, trying to look Brittany in the eye. Brittany pulled her lips into her mouth, clicking her tongue.

"I understand that you couldn't wait, I just didn't know you would get over me so easily."

"What are you talking about Britt?" Santana grunted, "Haven't you been listening to me at all?

"I know," Brittany mumbled.

"What do you mean? "Santana asked confused,

"I know Santana, I know about you and Rachel,"

Santana looked up at Brittany dumbfounded, what the hell? "About me and Rachel…?"

"Just stop it okay Santana I know!" Brittany shouted this time, shocking Santana, "And it's really funny that you are getting angry at me because I love two people when you obviously love Rachel,"

"Love…what?" Santana stuttered, "I am not in love with Rachel she's my friend and that's all trust me."

"So do you kiss all your friends?" Brittany spat, "And here I thought I was special,"

Santana's mind tried to work as quickly as Brittany's, trying to understand what she was trying to say.

"Rachel and I aren't together," Santana tried to explain.

"You kissed her tonight, I know."

Santana's eyes finally widened, she finally understood. Just like everything else this was working against her too, how did Brittany even find out about that?

"Oh my god," Santana sighed, "I can explain that!"

"Don't even try I am leaving,"

"No wait!" Santana said trying to push Brittany away from the door knob, "Wait, wait look just listen,"

"You have five minutes,"

"Rachel got a little drunk tonight," Santana began, rushing through her thoughts. Brittany crossed her arms, tapping her right foot on the tile. "And she was really sad about…about…uh," Santana paused trying to figure out a way of telling the story without openly outing Rachel "she was just sad, and I went to help her and she thought that love was too hard and that it would be easier with me, so she asked if she could kiss me…" Santana sputtered out, "I promised to one kiss that's all, and it was horrible we both agreed!"

"Why would she want to kiss you?" Brittany asked,

"Uhm ouch," Santana laughed,

"No not because it's you, because well isn't Rachel straight?" Brittany asked.

"You were just accusing me of having a relationship, and now you are worried why she was kissing a girl?"

"Well if you want your story to make sense…"

"She's…" Santana began biting t her lip, "She just had to work some things, and you of all people should know how horrible it is to put a label on someone,"

"I guess," Brittany muffled uncrossing her arms, "So you aren't going out with Rachel?"

"God no," Santana sputtered, "She is not my type,"

Brittany quirked a smile, tiling her head to the side,

"Were you jealous?" Santana poked, sneering, "Were you jealous of Rachel Berry,"

Brittany blushed twirling her fingers, "No…"

"I don't believe you," Santana chuckled.

"Brittany!" Artie's voice yelled again, Santana felt her rage boil as she thought of that boy he would be the end of her.

Brittany sighed, scratching the back of her neck, "I have to go."

"You can't be serious," Santana exasperated, "After everything I just told you, you are still going to leave?"

"It's not so black and white Santana," Brittany groaned.

"Hm, go with your best friend you have known all your life who has openly admitted to be head of heals for you," Santana said, lifting her hands up, "Or go for Wheels who you have only known since freshman year, and only been romantically involved for a couple of months."

"Don't make it out like it's that easy!"

"Why can't it be?" Santana asked

"If it was that easy you would have told me you loved me a long time again, if anything about this was easy you wouldn't have used me all those years as some experimental doll."

"You were never..."

"-Don't even try to act like you are an innocent bystander, you say it's my fault for our friendship to be dying?" Brittany growled, "What about all those times you left me in bed to go to Pucks to try to bang some straight into you, all those times you told me that you weren't in love with me, all those times that you pointy told me that you were just using me? Do you have any Idea how many nights I fell asleep crying because of you," Brittany said getting heated up , "I am not just some emotionless stone Santana, Artie has always appreciated me,"

Santana stood in silence, each word cutting deeper into her skin. It hurt most because she couldn't deny any of Brittany's statements. She had done all that and more to Brittany, now looking back Santana wasn't surprised Brittany didn't want to be with her, she was horrid to her, she didn't deserve her.

"Now if you will excuse me I have to get back to the party," Brittany said, pushing Santana to the side, so she could reach the door.

Santana moved without resistance this time, her eye shut as tears began to build in them. She could feel Brittany move but did not dare open her soaking eyes to watch her blonde hair disappear. She could feel any heat that had just built up now drain from her, her face feeling like ice. Why had she been so naive why did she allow herself for so long to ever think that she could ever make up for all that she did.

Whipping away her tears Santana bolted from the bathroom, trying to make it to Rachel's front door and out. She didn't care if she was supposed to sleep of with Rachel or if she was supposed to help clean up, she needed to get out and she needed it now. He lungs felt like they were about to explode as she gasped for breath.

Santana ran, reaching the front door and yanking it open, jogged out into the clear night.

"Santana!" Rachel's voice sounded from behind her, Santana ignored her, her own pace into turning into a full out sprint down the street.

She didn't even bother with her car, her keys were in her jacket downstairs anyways.

"Santana stop!" Rachel yelled trying to pump her legs faster, she knew she was faster than Santana in the short distance but Santana held the upper hand in stamina and it looked like she had not intent in stopping anytime soon as she continued down the street, her bare feet slapping against the pavement.

Another block later and Rachel had no choice but to stop gasping for air,

"Santana wait!" but it was a useless call out into the air, as the long raven hair disappeared around the street corner, tears running on the side of her face.

Santana did not stop running in fact until she found herself standing in front of her house. She looked to see her mother's car in her drive way, her dads still gone on the business trip he had attended last week. The sudden urge to run to her mom was almost too much. She had never been able to talk to her about it, never felt comfortable with talking to her about it. But at that moment the pull to her mom felt like gravity on earth, it was the only thing in her mind at the moment that would rid of some of the absolute sorrow in her soul.

Sucking in a deep breath, Santana looked down the block finding no one in sight. She let out a scattered sob, looking down at the ground, she could no longer keep it in herself. She knew this day would come, the day where she would self-combust, she felt like a ticking time bomb, and she had been finally detonated.

Shuffling her feet forward Santana sluggishly came to the door, griping the door handle, her hand shaking. The hair on her body, standing up on ends, she could taste the metallic taste of where she had bit her lip too hard. She slowly twisted the knob, opening it into her large home.

"Who's there?" her mother called out,

Santana opened her mouth to respond but only found silence; her throat felt like it was tied up in a knot as she peered into the room around the corner. Like she had predicted her mother was sitting in their living room with one lamp on, reading a large book. The moment her mother met her expression, her face softened

"Tana?" She whispered standing up and running around the sofa toward her daughter. Santana nodded chocking out a sob borrowing her head into her mother's shoulder when she wrapped her arms around her. "Tana baby what's wrong?" she muttered into her hair, scratching her back softly as she has always when Santana needed comforting.

"M-m-mom," She chocked, her eyes burning. She was a brick slowly sinking down towards rock bottom. "M-mom, I-I think I n-need to t-tell you something," Santana managed pulling away from her mother embrace for a second, to stare at her open eyed tear tracks running down her cheeks.

"Okay," Maribel whispered, "Do you want to sit down?"

Santana tried to clear her throat nodding her head slowly, letting her mother lead her towards their living room, rubbing away her tears. Maribel pushed away her hair that was sticking to her face, trying to clear her daughters face as they sat on the sofa by each other.

"I-I don't really know how to say t-this," Santana murmured.

"It's alright honey," she soothed "you know you can tell me anything,"

"I need you," Santana gasped,

"I'm right here," she muttered "I'll always be here for you Santana,"

"Do you promise?" Santana asked innocently, looking up at her mother through tear ridden eyes.

"Of course, now tell me what is on your mind?" she murmured stroking her fingers through her hair, trying to calm down Santana.

"I haven't been completely truthful with you," Santana muffled,

"What teenage girl is?" Her mother chuckled.

"I just want to be honest with you, because I love you so much…" She slurred "And I just need to get it out before it completely eats away at me,"

"You are scaring me Tana, what is it?"

Santana took a deep breath trying to steady her ever screaming nerves, her hands shaking.

"It's about Brittany," Santana sighed,

"What about Brittany?" her mother gasped, "is she alright!"

"Yes, yes!" Santana assured her, "No well it is about Brittany but also me…"

"Santana please," Her mother pleaded looking to her, her eyes growing with worry, "Please whatever it is it can't be worse then what I have thought of in my head."

"You know when you told me that Brittany and I had a special bond, that we could never be separated because we had a special bond,"

"Of course," Maribel urged, "I always knew that,"

"Well when I was around the age of twelve, or thirteen I realized that too," Santana whispered,

"It took you that long, but you practically lived together before hand."

"Mom…" Santana whispered "I…I-I'm in l-l-love with Brittany."

Maribel looked down at her defeated daughter, her eyes fixed on her lap, not daring to look at her mother for fear of rejection. Her hands were clenched into tight fists, her eyes closed tightly. She held her breath waiting for an answer, for something, anything.

"I'm gay mami," Santana finally whispered, it was one of the first times she had ever even said the word out loud, and here she was saying it to her mother.

"Santana," her mother cooed "Look at me Santana," she whispered tilting her daughters chin up to look at her.

Santana sucked in a deep breath looking up at her mother with such desperation, her eyes clouded with the soft expression of wanting to be accepted.

"How long have you known Tana?" she asked calmly, her eyes warmly looking down at her daughter.

"I don't know," Santana whispered, "I guess since I was… fourteen fifteen?"

"Tana," she sighed, "And you have been hiding for that long?"

Santana slowly nodded her head, not sure where her mother was going with this, of course she had to hide, she would hide in that flannel closet all her high school, they lived in Lima Ohio not West Hollywood.

"Santana," Her mother said slowly, "I will love you no matter who you are, and I will love who you love."

Santana pulled in her lips, looking up at her mother with a small grin, "really?"

"Oh course, you are my daughter, and I know it can be a horrible place out there but," she paused looking down at Santana, "in this house, with your family you must know that you will be accepted, and be loved unconditionally, love is love and it does not matter to me that you love girls," she smiled, "At least now I don't have to worry about you getting pregnant," she smiled trying to lighten the mood.

Santana let out a chocked laugh, pulling her hand through her hair, "I love you mami."

Maribel smiled softly, pulling Santana into a tight huge, her eyes even growing a bit wet. It wasn't that she was disappointed or hurt, but that she knew that Santana had struggled with this for so long.

"Why are you home from the party so early?" her mother asked pulling away to look back down at her.

"That's the other part," Santana sighed, her tears finally ending somehow. "Brittany is with Artie,"

"Oh,"

"I told her a month or so ago that I loved her, but she…" Santana paused, "She said she loved me back but that she still loved Artie and stayed with him, that's why we haven't been talking that much."'

"Oh honey," her mother sympathized.

"Tonight we finally…" Santana slurred, "Well I thought things were going to change but they didn't she still went back to wheels, and she made me realize that I have done some unforgivable things to her, I don't even know why she still talks to me."

Maribel tried to soak in the new information, she always knew they were close, and even at times considered if they may be more than just friends but the actual realization of it was far different then the idea.

"You shouldn't say that about yourself," she said, "I am sure whatever you did is no worse than what she is doing to you right now."

"You don't know about our history mom," Santana murmured "You wouldn't understand,"

"Then help me understand."

Santana looked up in a calculating gaze trying to figure how much she should tell her mother. In the past she was always fairly honest with her in her heterosexual relations, but wasn't this a little different, shouldn't this be spent under the rug a little more? But as Santana looked to her mother all she could find was ultimate love, there was only concern for her daughter. Santana realized that it wouldn't matter that she was talking about a girl; her mother probably even preferred that it was Brittany since she already knew and loved her. And so without further delay Santana began to explain to her mother Santana and Brittany's long and twisted history starting off in eighth grade.

A.N Thank you all for your reviews they always keep me writing :)

I know this was kind of angsty but you have to have some here and there :P

please review and tell me what you thin and if you have any suggestions :3

and if you want you can follow me on tumblr at brittanaextreme