Sakura's thoughts

Sasuke's thoughts

I am never working through the night again. I swear it was bad enough when people were bugging me about "me and Sasuke" all afternoon. Those damn nosey interns better watch themselves. My whole double shift was spent answering their stupid questions about "us". There is no "us"!

Sakura sighed. She knew that the interns weren't the only thing bugging her. After Hinata left her words rung in Sakura's head the whole day (and night).

There is no us, but is that really what I want?

She finished changing out of her scrubs and started leaving the hospital.

"Have a nice day Sakura."

Sakura turned to smile. "You too Kate."

As she stepped out of the hospital she took a deep breath and headed to Sasuke's house. Sakura decided not to use the shortcut this time because it have her more time to think and clear her mind before arriving home and having to deal with the source of her problems…Sasuke.

I can't love him anymore, I just can't. I fooled myself into thinking he could return my love when we were younger, but I learned that he just couldn't. The day he left, he left me there alone after I put my heart on my sleeve for him. I can't do this to myself again. I will not go through the self torture for a man who cannot return my feelings.

…Then again he has changed drastically. These past months that I've spent living with him I've seen him laugh more that I had in the 12 years I had known him before. Not to mention the extraordinary way he gets along with Sofai. Since the first moment she met him she was taken with him as if she'd known him her whole life. He even agreed to let her call him dad. Augh! This is just so confusing.

It seemed much too soon as Sakura rounded the corner towards the Uchiha Manor. The longer walk was supposed to help her clear her head, but all it managed to do is make her more confused. Damn Hinata! Sakura knew it wasn't really Hinata's fault; her feelings for Sasuke had been there all along. However, it was Hinata who uncovered those feelings once more after Sakura had buried them.

Sakura was dreading going into the house. She didn't want to have to face Sasuke while she was so emotionally confused (not to mention physically drained). She had to go in, however, because she wanted to see her daughter before she went off to the academy.

After finding her courage, Sakura got the key from its hiding place and opened the door. The sight that met her eyes shocked her. At this time Sofai would be getting ready for school, but the house was silent.

She must have slept in. I leave Sasuke in charge for one day and my baby's going to get her fist tardy. Well, if I hurry her along we might still make it on time.

Sakura shook her head as she climbed up the stairs. All she wanted to do was go to sleep but now thanks to Sasuke she would be sprinting her child to school instead. She stopped outside of Sofai's room and knocked lightly.

"Sofai? Sweetie? It's time to get ready for school."

When nobody answered Sakura silently opened the door, expecting to see a lump under the comforter. The bed was still made, looking like it hadn't been slept in.

Oh no! Where is she?!

Instead of rationalizing the situation, Sakura dropped her purse and ran to Sasuke's room. Without bothering to knock, Sakura barged into the room and attacked Sasuke.

"Sasuke wake up! Something's wrong! Sofai isn't in her room! We have to look for her!"

The whole time she had been frantically shaking Sasuke on the verge of hyperventilation. Suddenly the emotional strain of the last day caught up with her as she started crying hysterically, collapsing onto the floor. Sasuke opened his eyes, looking angry that someone had so rudely woken him up. When he noticed Sakura sobbing on the floor he immediately got up and picked her off the floor. She clung to him, crying into his chest. He stood there and hugged her, his hand rubbing soothing circles into her back in attempt to calm her. Slowly the sobs that had wrecked her body turned into quiet whimpering, then into slight hiccups. As she settled down Sasuke pried her away from him to see if she was okay. He looked down at her and saw her smiling slightly at him. Sakura's knees suddenly gave out and she let herself fall, too exhausted to try and stop it. Before she hit the floor two strong arms wrapped around her waist.

"Sakura?!" Sasuke sounded slightly panicked.

He lifted her up and sat her on the edge of his bed. She swayed slightly but them seemed to get a grip on herself. Sasuke went and stood right in front of her.

"Sakura look at me."

She slowly lifted her head to find herself staring at Sasuke's perfectly sculpted abs.

Does this man ever sleep with a shirt on? Then again, with a body like that he doesn't really have to…damn! This isn't helping my situation at all.

Sakura tilted her chin upward only to be met with Sasuke's worried gaze.

"Sakura how many fingers am I holding up?"

"Three."

"Now?"

"Seven."

"How about now?"

"Five."

"How about—"

"I'm fine Sasuke honest. The all nighter got to me, that's all."

"You scared me there for a minute. First you come into my room screaming, then you start crying, then you just pass out. You sure know how to get someone up in the morning."

Sakura was about to make a sarcastic remark as Sasuke sat down when she noticed Molly on the nightstand and remembered why she had come into Sasuke's room in the first place.

"Sasuke, where's Sofai?" Sakura's eyes started to well up with tears as she prepared for the worst.

What if she got kidnapped while Sasuke was asleep? What if she's dea—No! Get a grip!

Sasuke pulled Sakura to him in a hug when he saw she was going to start crying again.

"Shh Sakura its okay, Sofai is fine. She slept over at Naruto's house last night."

Sasuke tensed as he felt Sakura stiffen in his embrace. She looked up at him with such fury in her eyes he felt a chill go down his spine.

"You were left here alone?! Don't you remember the hokage saying you weren't allowed to be by yourself? What were you thinking Sasuke?! You're on probation! Imagine the consequences for both of us if she had dropped in for one of her inspections and you were here alone! You shouldn't have—"

Sasuke suddenly let Sakura go and walked away. He swiftly climbed into bed and pulled the blanket over himself.

He did NOT just ignore me!

Sakura went to the opposite side of the bed from where Sasuke was laying down. The temptation to just start beating the crap out of him was staggering.

"Sasuke I'm responsible for you. If the hokage knew about this she would kill me! Do you understand the severity of what you just did?"

Sasuke lifted his head making his onyx eyes meet Sakura's emerald ones.

"Sakura yesterday was a stressful day. I am really tired and it is just too early for this. You can yell at me later, but right now let me go back to sleep."

Sakura took one of her hands off her hips and pointed her finger right at Sasuke's face.

"You listen to me Sasuke Uchiha—eep!"

Sasuke had suddenly reached for Sakura's wrist and pulled her into the bed towards him. Now Sakura was once again wrapped in Sasuke's arms and was flush against his bare chest.

"Go to sleep. You need to rest. You can yell at me in the morning."

His voice was tired and he slightly slurred his last words as exhaustion overtook him once more. It was obvious he was tired, but the reason was unknown to Sakura. Before Sakura had time to respond he was fast asleep, his chin resting lightly on top of Sakura's head. Sakura tried to escape his embrace but his iron grip held fast. When she had succeeded in loosening his hold, it became firmer and pulled her tighter against him so that now their whole bodies were connected except for Sakura's arms which were pinned between their chests.

Well, see what you've gotten yourself into Sakura? Being wrapped in his arms after you came home didn't help this situation 'he loves me, he loves me not' did it? Oh well, there's not exactly much I can do now and it's not exactly as if I can escape. Might as well get some sleep, lord knows I need it.

She carefully removed her shoes using her feet and kicked them off the bed. The sudden movement caused Sasuke's legs to intertwine with her own. Now Sasuke's left leg was possessively clutching her right leg, their bodies still recklessly close. Sakura blushed as she realized how their situation would look to outside eyes. After a while of just laying there in his arms, Sakura was finally lulled to sleep by the steady beating of Sasuke's heart.

--

Sasuke slowly stirred as the scent of strawberries invaded his nostrils continuously.

Wait a minute…strawberries?

He slowly started to realize that his arms were gripping someone to him. There was someone else in bed with him, and judging by how petite the body felt he assumed it was a woman.

What exactly happened last night? Am I dreaming?

He cracked one eye open and all he saw was pink. He had almost convinced himself he was drunk when the body moved beside him. Finally he opened both his eyes and saw Sakura snuggling into his chest.

Oh. Shit. Did something happen last night?! No, I think I would remember something.

Sasuke tried to remember what had happened. He suddenly recalled Sakura waking him up at 6 in the morning saying Sofai was gone. He looked down again. He saw spooning Sakura (her back was to his front) in his bed, in his room, while they were home alone, and he was currently not wearing a shirt. If someone, say the hokage for example, were to walk in at this instant they would surely jump to the wrong conclusion. Wishing not to get Sakura into more trouble because of him, he slowly started to untangle himself from her, careful not to wake her.

He slowly unwound their legs and when that task was complete he tried to gently remove his arms from around her. As soon as he started moving his arm Sakura's arm wound itself around his arms keeping them in their current position around her waist, resting on her stomach. Sasuke cursed under his breath.

Damn, I tried. It seems the only way I'm going to be able to do this is to wake her up. I just hope I don't end up neutered. I still remember how grumpy she used to get when we woke her up while on missions.

Sasuke shuddered slightly at the memory. He sighed and settled back into bed. Everyone knew that waking Sakura up could be fatal. He subconsciously began stroking the back of her hand with thumb. He breathed in the aroma of her hair once more, and then caught himself.

What are you doing?! Weren't you saying yesterday that you didn't love her? Pull yourself together man! You don't love her. You don't love her. You don't love her.

With that little chant in his head Sasuke started to gently shake Sakura.

Nothing.

He shook her a bit harder.

Nothing.

He shook her just a bit harder. "Sakura, it's time to wake up."

Sakura stirred for a minute, but merely snuggled her body even closer to Sasuke. Sasuke hissed slightly as her behind gently grinded against his front. This was getting out of hand. Sasuke needed to wake her up NOW.

He tried waking her again.

"Sakura you need to get up. We have to do something before Sofai comes home for school and we're wasting time—"

Sakura had turned around in Sasuke's arms and put her hand over his mouth, silencing him.

"Just a bit longer, then I'll get up I promise."

Sasuke sighed against her mouth and nodded. She smiled and reached up to kiss Sasuke's cheek whispering "you're the best" into his ear. Sasuke was frozen as she snuggled herself into his chest once more, shivering slightly as he felt her warm breath across his bare skin.

Okay, she's still delirious from her sleep. Yeah, that's it. She's just tired. She's sleepy; obviously she doesn't know what she's doing. It didn't mean anything at all.

Although it meant nothing (at least that's what he kept telling himself), he hugged Sakura closer to him. He knew he was in denial about his feelings for her, but he didn't care. If he acknowledged his feelings for her, then that meant they were real. He knew that he could never tell her because of all the damage he did to her when they were younger. He had never acknowledged the love she said she had for him. When she told him that she loved him, that she would be willing to leave with him, to be by his side he made her pass out and left her there on a bench. She would never forgive him for breaking her heart into microscopic pieces. Too late now he realizes that he may have loved her all along, but the threat of his brother had stopped those harboring feelings from being acknowledged, even by himself. This is the first time he's felt something this strong for a female that was not related to him. He honestly didn't know what to do.

Well, really there was nothing he could do. He came to this realization after she had obviously gotten over him. She didn't want him, and he had to learn to accept that in reality it was his fault. Finally breaking from his stream of self loathing Sasuke turned his attention to the clock on his nightstand. 12:47 pm. Sofai would get out of school in about 30 minutes and he hadn't even gotten Sakura out of bed, let along talked to her.

I'll have to call Naruto for a favor.

Sasuke removed one arm from Sakura and reached for his cell phone on his nightstand. He dialed Naruto's number and waited for him to pick up.

"Hello?"

"Hey Naruto, its Sasuke. Listen, I need a favor."

"Sure man fire away."

"I was wondering if you could keep Sofai for another day. I still haven't talked to Sakura and Sofai is about to get out of school."

"Sure man, it's no problem. Just make sure you talk to her."

"I will. Hey man I got to go okay?"

Sakura was starting to stir on the bed.

"Yeah man. Laters."

Sasuke closed his phone as Sakura was opening her eyes.

"You know you said a little bit longer. It's been an hour already."

Sakura yawned into his chest and flipped him off without even raising her head. She felt his chuckling through her cheek as his chest shook. She finally leaned away from him and sat up. As she started to stretch, Sasuke got up from the bed and moved towards the door.

"Are pancakes for breakfast okay?"

"Shouldn't we be having lunch by now?"

Sasuke shrugged. "Do you want something for lunch then?"

"No, pancakes are okay."

He stood at the door way looking at her for a moment.

"How do you like your eggs?"

"Over easy please."

Sasuke nodded and left down the hallway. Sakura leaned back into his bed. As she buried her head into the pillow she noticed that the whole bed was giving off the scent of Sasuke. She inhaled deeply. It wasn't a cologne scent, but the natural scent that Sasuke had. It was a musky smell, but not overbearingly so. There was the smell of wilderness about him, like pines or dirt. She couldn't quite place it.

The scent of Sasuke.

She breathed in once more. She giggled to herself like a teenager and got up from the bed. She left the room and headed towards the bathroom. She knew she was in deep, but she didn't care. It would hurt when his probation was over and she would have to leave, but in the meantime she would enjoy what she could. She smiled to herself as she heard the sound of falling pans and Sasuke's cursing. Sasuke, meanwhile, was trying to focus so he wouldn't burn their breakfast.

He was thinking of his probation. When it ended he didn't want Sakura to leave, but there was no way she would stay with him of all people. He would allow himself to succumb to his feelings while he was still staying with her. He started getting a silly grin on his face as he remembered the events of the previous night. He's surprised she didn't just start beating him after he pulled her into bed with him. The smell of burning pancake brought him out of his thoughts. He stayed focus with the rest of their breakfast, careful not to let anything else burn.

Sasuke quickly finished making the food and placed it all along with two cups of orange juice a tray. He picked up the tray and climbed up the stairs, reaching the first floor as Sakura stepped out of the bathroom. As she looked up her face was a mix of shock and…could it be affection?

"Sakura, if you could please go back to the bedroom."

"Why are you serving breakfast in bed?"

"Well, this morning when you got home from work you collapsed in my bedroom, twice, and I didn't want you falling down the stairs." He said, shrugging his shoulders.

Sakura's hands were on her hips. "I'm not weak Sasuke. I could have made it down the stairs."

He shrugged once more and started maneuvering around her. "Just humor me then Sakura."

I think that may be the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me.

"Sakura, if you insist on just standing there please tell me so we can eat in the hallway. If not then get over here, the food is getting cold."

Sakura chuckled slightly and went back towards his bedroom. He was already under the covers sipping slightly at his cup of orange juice.

"Really Sasuke, we don't have to eat in your bedroom."

"Sakura, you're still tired. I can see it in your eyes."

Sakura raised her eyebrow as she climbed under the covers once more. Sasuke shrugged once more and swallowed the piece of pancake he had been chewing.

"I've gotten fairly good at reading people's eyes over the last couple of years."

Sakura finally started turned her attention to her food. "When did you learn how to cook?"

Sasuke shrugged again. "You forget I've been on my own since I was fairly young. I had to learn how to cook for myself. Trust me when I say that it wasn't without effort. There were many times when I gave myself food poisoning, but in the end I learned at least the basics of cooking."

Sakura nodded and continued eating. They sat there in silence, but it was not uncomfortable or awkward. In fact it was a fairly pleasant silence filled only with the sound of clanking dishes. When they finished Sakura got up and took the tray. She started heading for the door.

"Sakura, I really must insist that you don't walk down the stairs."

"Don't worry about it Sasuke. I'll be right back; I'm just going to take these to the kitchen."

"Sakura."

Sakura turned to face Sasuke once again. He was not meeting her eyes, his focused on his hands in front of him, resting on his knees.

"I need to talk to you about something when you come back."

Sakura gulped slightly at the faint pain radiating from his voice. She nodded weakly and turned to leave. She quickly walked down the hallway and carefully walked down the stairs lest she actually fall. She hurried back upstairs, eager and at the same time nervous at what Sasuke wanted to talk to her about.

Maybe he realized that you're showing affection towards him again. Maybe he's going to apologize for stringing you along, making you think he cares. No, stop that. He sounded sad, but it was strained as if he was trying not to show it. I think this issue might be more serious than he initially let on.

As she entered the room, Sasuke was pulling on a black shirt. He refused to look her in the eyes as she approached. He only took her hand and led her down the hallway, passing several more hallways. They finally reached the last hallway. He only stared down it for a moment. Sakura turned to see him clenching and unclenching his jaw, as if he was feeling physical pain from this hallway. She squeezed his hand lightly, as if telling him that she was here. He turned to her and smiled slightly, but the emotion didn't reach his eyes. He slowly started leading her down the hallway, her eyes alert to their foot prints in the collected dust, the pictures on the wall so caked with dust that you couldn't see them anymore. When she looked forward once more she noticed the single door at the end of the hallway. Sasuke stopped in front of it and took a deep breath in an attempt to steady his rapid heartbeat.

It's now or never.

He let go of Sakura's hand and slowly opened the door. Sakura stared into the room. It looked quite normal. There was a great bed to one side, the sheets all black. Then she stared at the other side of the room and gasped. She noticed the picture first of all. She walked into the room and looked upon the faces of Sasuke's family, their blood splattered features. She saw the Sasuke of her past, the young carefree boy. He was perched on the knee of his mother, his father standing proud behind them. To the side of his father was a younger Itachi. She felt an involuntary shiver and tore her eyes away from the picture. She turned back to see Sasuke still standing as she left him, his face still and emotionless.

She walked back towards him slowly. He stood staring straight at the picture of his family on the other side of the room. As she walked closer his gaze refused to budge. Making no noise she silently put her arms around him, locking her arms behind his back. He slowly moved his arms to return her embrace, his silent tears streaming down his face. She felt the tears falling down onto the top of her head, but she refused to move her position.

He wanted me to see this. He's finally letting me in.

Sasuke finally let go of the self control he had been holding onto since he was 7 years old. He broke down. He started sobbing, losing feeling in his legs and letting himself just fall. Sakura held onto him the whole time, sitting on the dusty ground with him while he sobbed. He cried for a long while, letting all the built up pain of losing his family go in one blow. Sakura held him closer as the sobs racked his body, her hand running through his hair letting him let go. Once he had stopped crying he allowed Sakura to help him up. He kept his head down as she led him to the bed that had once belonged to his parents.

Sakura sat Sasuke and herself on the bed, her thumb rubbing circles into the back of Sasuke's hand. He finally looked up to see her looking at him. She wiped away two remaining tears with her other hand and cupped his cheek.

"Whenever you're ready Sasuke, I'm here to listen. Take your time; I know it's hard for you."

She smiled at him in reassurance and he smiled back slightly.

"I honestly don't know where to start."

"Well, why don't you start from where ever you can remember best."

Sasuke nodded and took a deep breath. "When I was younger…"

TBC…

Whoo! Another chapter up! i just want to take this moment to thank my faithful reviewers and all the people that have read this story thus far. I checked and therer have been over 7,000 hits on this story so i am extremely pleased :)

I'd also like to thank Trelunas for pointing out that mistake.

Also, I'd like to announce that this story will probably wrap up in the next 3 or 4 chapters. But on the bright side you'll find out who Sofai's father is in either the next chapter or the chapter after that. (whoo!)

Please review! Good, bad, or stupid i want to know your opinion!