The hospital was crowded today, many people waiting in line to check on their families and meet a doctor. Many people coughed occasionally, but that was expected in any crowded room, especially when most of them were diseased.
Now that Castiel was close to death, he felt sympathy for those who were in his and Dean's position. Suffering through a whole lot of shit just to make it out alive.
As soon as Dean stood in front of the counter, he asked for a doctor Cain, the man he had spoken to about the Artemisinin.
"Doctor Cain? I'm sorry, but he's not in. His wife recently passed. Doctor Ellen will be able to help you."
Dean sighed. "Is she on the second floor?"
The nurse nodded, and he sat back down on his receptionist chair. "Next!" He called out, and Dean left for the elevator.
"What'd they say?" Lucifer asked, catching up to him, though not showing much worry in his face. More like a vague interest.
"They didn't say anything about Cas. I'm going to see this doctor chick first. I want to get the medicine as soon as I can." Dean responded.
The small jolt of the elevator as it lifted off led them to being carried up the elevator shaft and onto the second floor.
Dean didn't bother looking at door signs anymore. He had memorized 221B's location precisely, and he tapped on the door like he always did, opening it a crack.
A nurse was by Castiel's bed, attempting to make him eat some sort of gross hospital mush.
"Dean Winchester?" The nurse asked expectantly, and Dean nodded.
The nurse smiled, but as she passed, she leaned in next his ear. "Try to make him eat, would you?"
Dean didn't respond.
Castiel's eyes had lit up as soon as he heard the four taps on the door. He looked up at Dean with glad eyes, and he was sitting up, supporting himself with his elbows, although they were shaking under the struggle of sitting up. He looked thin, and Dean sighed, pulling open his jacket. In the pockets were two bulges, and Dean pulled them out individually, tossing them to Castiel.
White Castle burgers.
Castiel smiled happily, resting his head back against the pillow. He unwrapped one, taking a large bite as if he hadn't eaten for days. "Thank you, Dean." He said after swallowing.
Dean nodded, fiddling with his necklace, one from Sam a few years back.
Dean waited patiently for the doctor while Castiel rambled on and on about the poor conditions of the hospital restroom and cafeteria.
Lucifer hadn't even come into the room yet, and Dean thought he knew why. If Lucifer was right about this, then Castiel and him were on the worst possible terms.
Lucifer, beating his brother into the ground, multiple times. Lucifer, ensuring that Castiel had the place of biggest loser in the school, an object of everybody's taunting.
They hated each other, and Dean could only guess at what had started their feud.
Castiel was looking slightly annoyed, and so Dean shook his head, clearing his thoughts. "What's wrong?" He asked, and Castiel huffed.
"You're not listening." He said, and Dean apologized.
"Now what were you saying?" Dean asked, and Castiel pointed. Following the direction of his gesture, he saw Lucifer standing in the doorway. He seemed genuinely concerned for his brother, yet at the same time he looked like he wanted to say something mean or be a dick again.
"What's he doing here?" Castiel asked angrily. "He said that you drove him." He said accusingly.
Dean rubbed the back of his neck. "Cas, he's family. He wanted to see you. I know you guys don't like each other, bu-"
"Don't like each other? He tried to kill me on multiple occasions! He broken arm for fun when I was eight years old!" He shouted, and he seemed to regret it. "Dean, I just... Lucifer and I are brothers, but Dad kicked him out when we were younger. After that, we grew apart. Then he decided to start being an assbutt to me, and now..."
Dean sighed, rubbing his forehead. "Well I've always had an okay relationship with Sammy, so I thought you guys had at least some care for the other's well being."
Lucifer had left the doorway sometime during their conversation, and Castiel looked visibly relaxed. He had obviously forgiven Dean, but he still had I wonder what Lucifer had to gain by showing up here in the first place.
"Oh, and Cas! I have the money! As soon as the doctor hurries their ass in here, we can get you the Artemisinin!" Dean looked excited, and hopes radiated from him; hope to be able to save his family, as well as his future.
Castiel studied his face. Dean looked so happy, as if the answer to saving Castiel was in the palm of his hands, and yet he didn't have the guts to tell Dean that the drug wouldn't do anything for him.
Castiel was dying.
Hell? Heaven? Who knows... He had been as good as he could, but a sin couldn't be avoided in everyone's life.
Dean was already on the highway to hell, so Castiel wouldn't want to be up in Heaven forced to know that he was suffering. He'd rather be stuck in hell and heaven together, and yet he'd quite possibly be stuck in a 18 year old body for eternity, while Dean would grow old, probably marry someone and have children, and Castiel couldn't stand the thought.
"Hey Dean." Castiel started, hesitant at first to ask the question that had been burning his mind since Dean had showed up a week ago.
Dean looked up. "Yeah?"
"Remember last week when you asked me..." He trailed off.
Dean smiled knowingly. "Castiel. You planning on saying yes?" He asked, and Cas smiled.
"Maybe." He said. "I wouldn't marry you now, but I would promise to. I, Castiel Novak, promise that I'll marry you someday." He laughed. "That sounded stupid, I'm sorry."
Dean cracked an award winning smirk, his eyes filled with happiness. Did this mean that Castiel wouldn't accept death? "I, Dean Winchester, promise I'll make sure you marry me someday." He copied, taking Castiel's hand in his own. "Cas, I know it's weird for me to ask that, but life without you seems... I don't know, I guess it's like when there's a really important character on a show. And if they died, the show would lose everything. Money, fans. Same with me, though I don't have a lot of cash, and I sure as hell don't have a fan club. I just can't imagine life without you, you know?"
Castiel smiled a little. "I know what you mean..." He sighed. "I jut met you this year, but I can't see myself being happy in the future, unless you're a part of that future."
Dean's face was colored with a light pink, and Castiel laughed with triumph. He had finally made Dean blush!
Dean averted his eyes. "Let's not make this a gay romance movie." He said, and Castiel mimicked his earlier words.
"I just can't imagine life without you." Castiel said in his best Dean impression, a deep voice that sounded fake.
Dean smiled. "I can't be happy unless you're a part of my future." Dean said, obviously much better at copying Castiel's voice than Cas was of Dean's.
After a while if comfortable silence, them staring up at a scripted-reality TV show, the door opened.
"Dr. Ellen." The blonde woman introduced. "Are you Dean Winchester?" She asked, to which Dean nodded. "Great. Someone said you needed me?"
Dean pulled out his wallet. "I need Artemisinin." He said, and the doctor laughed a bit.
"Er, I don't deal drugs to people." She said, but Dean pointed to Castiel.
"It's for him." He said, and she formed a small 'O' with her mouth before taking the money. "Artemisinin, you said? So you have Malaria?" She asked Castiel, and he nodded.
He looked pale and fragile, and Dean felt ashamed that he had added such energy to the conversation.
The doctor looked down at her clipboard. "How are you alive?" She asked suspiciously. "You haven't eaten in the past week and a half." She said, studying his face.

Castiel shoved the White Castle burger wrappers further under his sheets, worried she would see them. "There must be some mistake..." He said, feigning ignorance.
"Hmm." She said, inserting the money Dean handed her into a manila envelope, and leaving the room to fetch the medication.
Dean sighed in happy relief. "It's happening, Cas, it's really happening."
Castiel laughed. "Yeah, I guess so."
This is it. Castiel realized.
"Finally. After all that shit, we're going to get you better."
"Yeah."
This is the end. He thought.
Dean seemed to so happy as he blabbers on about what he did to get the money, elaborating on the punch he gave Lucifer at the club.
Castiel was going to die. In three days. That's what the doctor had said. Three days after today without the medicine and he would die. Even though the medication was here, it couldn't save him. There was less than a 20 percent chance of that happening. There was no way. He laughed blindly along with Dean.
Maybe Dean was right. He was a realist after all. There could be a 1% chance that saves him.
There could be a miracle.
Castiel smiled and laughed along with Dean at the right times, saying yes to almost everything and pretending to celebrate.
He was worried.
I don't want to die... He thought. He had promised Dean to grow old with him, to live in a house somewhere where the sun could reach the living room, and wake them in the mornings. Somewhere they could call home, and die with each other, acceptant of their oncoming deaths. After all, natural causes were better than not-natural.
Castiel had barely registered that the doctor had come back, and now Dean held his hand while his elbow was tied off, preparing for the shot.
The doctor used rubbing alcohol to clean up a space, and Castiel cringed at the smell. He hated shots, although with the needles stuck in his arm right now, he didn't have room to complain.
The cold metal came closer to him, and Dean grasped his hand as it went in.
"I'm not a child, Dean." He said as he released the breath he had been holding in. He watched the latex gloved hand push into the syringe, the clear liquid making his arm go cold. It must have been refrigerated, judging by how cold it was.
The needle was removed and a cotton ball placed over the blood, tied off with bandage as if he had just had his blood drawn.
The doctor nodded, completed. "If it begins to itch, swell, or if any inflammation occurs, contact a nurse immediately. There may also be minor side effects, which you should attempt to adjust to." She recited, and it was obviously something she's had to tell people before. She dropped her clipboard on the way out the door and bent down to retrieve it. "You can be discharged from the hospital in about three days, Mr. Novak."
Castiel nodded, but he didn't utter a thank you. He laid back on the bed, adjusting himself to the point of lying down.
"Dean, can you throw these away for me?" He asked Dean, handing him the burger wrappers.
Dean nodded, taking them from Castiel and walking across the room to place them in the trash bin. He crossed back to the bed, leaning against it, a smile on his face.
Castiel had peered at him out if the corner of his eye, and was now interested in what had Dean smiling. "What?" He asked, and Dean answered with a small kiss on the lips and two words.
"You're okay."
Castiel couldn't bring himself to do more than lift his lips in a fake grin. He couldn't bring that lie and false happiness to his eyes.
Dean took notice, but he chose to hope that Cas was just tired.
Instead he laid back on the bed with Castiel, shutting his eyes as he wrapped an arm around Castiel.
"I love you." Dean said quietly. "And I'm sorry."
"Oh hell no." Castiel said. "Dean, you're going to go into some rant about how everything is your fault, how I got this crap from a mosquito that was caused by you, then if I die, it's all your fault somehow, but you know what? It's not. None of this shit is your fault!" He said, unable to control his rant. He wasn't about to let Dean-
Dean had just said something.
"What?" Castiel asked.
"I said that I know." Dean responded.
Castiel looked to him in a mix of surprise and confusion. "You... You're not going to...?"
Dean chuckled, though there was nothing humorous around. "If I apologize, even if it was my fault, you'd do what you're doing now. Protecting a man who doesn't deserve protection."
He kissed Castiel sweetly. "I'm already lost... I'm probably going to hell."
Cas kissed him back, curling up so that his head rested on his shoulders. "There's still time to change that." He said, but Dean sighed, and Cas could feel him shaking his head.
"I'm too far past saving." Dean said, staring up at the white peppered ceiling.
"You don't think you deserve to be saved?" Castiel asked with confusion. Dean, of all people, deserved everything to be handed to him on trays made of diamond, especially after all the shit he's gone through and was working for.
Castiel's hand rested across Dean's sternum, his fingers spreading wide over the black t shirt. "I'll save you." He said, after Dean hadn't responded to his question. "I'll save you, no matter what."
The door creaked open, ruining the moment as a nurse entered. "Young man, it is far past visiting hours, and you should not be in bed with a patient! Out, before I call security!" She shrilled as Dean gave Castiel a quick kiss before rushing out the door, the nurse glaring angrily after him.
Castiel smiled as his face pressed into the pillow. He could hear Dean's heavy footsteps running down the hall, and the nurse's heels clicking as she went to get security, although Dean was already running.
Castiel sighed, releasing a large breath before falling into a dreamless night sleep.