"What's wrong?"
"I'm pregnant." Lily didn't know how to respond, she wanted to be happy, but she knew that this wasn't a good thing. Robin didn't want or really like kids, sure Robin liked her son but, this was going to be Robin and Barney's child. Barney, of all people; Robin continued "I don't know what to do."
Lily then asked the question that always came after you hear news like this, "Are you sure?"
"Ten tests and ten days late sure."
Lily again, didn't know what to say to comfort her best friend "Come in,"
Robin came in and collapsed on the couch. Lily asked her if she wanted some tea to calm down. Robin declined. Lily then asked "When are you gonna tell him?"
"I don't know. I don't know about anything right now." Lily knew Robin didn't be pestered about what she was going to do next, she couldn't handle it. They just sat there in silence, neither of them knew what to say. Then, they heard cries from Nicolas's baby monitor.
Lily thought "Just perfect freaking timing, Nick," and got up to tend to him.
"Can I observe? I'll probably be doing it soon."
"Certainly."
They were in Nicolas's nursery when Robin said "Even if I tried to talk to him he probably wouldn't want to. He's so fucking stubborn."
Lily thought "Hope the child doesn't inherit that," But said "He'll be better in a few weeks when he can use his penis again."
"Lily, I need to say this,"
"What?"
"I don't think that I can provide a good home for this child."
"Course you can"
"I work 50 hour weeks. That's on a good week. I don't even know if I can be a good mother. Kids are okay in small doses, but I don't think I can do this. Barney, I don't even know if he'll be there. If he is, he works a lot, don't know on what, but he does."
"What do you mean?" she then gasped "O my God, are you gonna get a-" Robin interrupted her and said
"I wanna give the baby up for adoption."
Lily sighed but she knew that this would be the best thing for all involved. She said "So, you're not gonna tell Barney."
"I don't know what I'm gonna tell him."
"I know," Lily said
"You know what?"
"I know what we're gonna tell him."
"What?"
XX
The Bar the next day
They were all at the bar and Lily and Marshall decided to make an announcement
"Hey guys! We have something big to tell you." Marshall said
"What?" asked Ted
"I think we'll have Robin tell it." Lily said
"I'm pregnant" she said and Barney spit his scotch out and exclaimed
"WHAT!"
"I should explain." Lily said
"Yes, yes, please do!" Barney said eagerly
"Marshall and I want to extend our family. The doctor said that it probably won't happen, sadly, so, we asked Robin to be a donor in artificial insemination. With much hesitation, she obviously agreed."
"Wait, Robin and Marshall are having a kid?" Barney asked
"No, its Lily's kid, it's just that Lily isn't carrying it." Marshall informed
"I thought you had super sperm and eggs?" Ted asked
"Turns out, that's wrong." Lily said sympatricly
"I'll buy the next round, minus Robin" Barney said and left
"There's something wrong" Ted said seriously
"What, there's nothing wrong." Marshall said trying to keep the secret.
Future Ted: "Kids, I always know when your Uncle Marshall is lying, because he sucks at it."
"She's not pregnant because of artificial insemination is she?" Ted said and looked at Robin who looked at Lily and Marshall. "It's Barney's isn't it? You're giving the baby to them when it's born aren't you?" Ted asked seriously
"You're right." Robin said "You going tell him?"
"No," Ted said.
"Why?" asked Marshall
"It's the best thing for all involved." Ted said
"Thanks, Ted" Robin said and smiled