Chopper refused to come out. Nami had knocked on the door a few times, sometimes she called out, but even she didn't have the energy to try any harder than that.
Chopper sat on the chair by the desk, sitting in this room specially made for him, where he could truly be a doctor.
He wanted to be a doctor to save lives. To help people who never wanted to help him.
After meeting Luffy... he realized he needed to be in his crew. He needed to be needed. He wanted to help those who wanted him.
Right now, all he wanted was to save the one person who saved him from that lonely self-hating existence. Chopper wanted to save him.
He wanted... he needed to save Luffy.
Slightly turning his head, he peeked at the bed, a bed reserved for his crew, his patients, his friends.
He saw a body on the bed, resting, sleeping. The man had a smile on his face as his body relaxed, and despite all the injuries, Chopper couldn't spot a sign of pain or regret on his face. Just a proud fatigue.
Turning his head away, Chopper began to cry once again. He sniffed, and he smiled, but he still wouldn't look back behind him at the bed.
"Are you starting to feel better, Luffy? You were really beaten up this time, but its okay, cause I'm here! You might find it hard to take this medicine, but I can help you with that! And when you're feeling all better again, we can have a party, and then we can have more adventures together as pirates. Just like you promised. And I'll always be there to patch you up again! Ne, Luffy?"
There was no response.
He couldn't stand the silence. Or the truth. So little Chopper continued. "You were able to save your brother, Luffy! You're so strong, fighting against those marines and warlords, even admirals... L...Luffy..." Chopper clenched his eyes shut, hoping it would reduce the emount of tears that overflowed. It didn't. He knew it was hard for everyone else too, but he couldn't keep silent anymore. He wailed Luffys name, repeating the sound over and over. "LUFFY! L-LUFFY~ LUFFY-FFY-Y" His voice went silent after his last call- his grief over-coming him, until all he could do was beg with a voice tinier than his body, sadder than his wailing and as broken as he felt.
"Please Luffy, please come back...I only went out to sea because-because of you Luffy... you're my friend, my f-first ever friend..." His voice pitched higher at the end of each silent sentence.
He sniffed, still not looking back. "I promise I'll work harder Luffy! I can become a monster if you want me to Luffy, I can do that if its for you! And then I'll come with you to the end of the Grand Line, curing you and helping you whenever I can... I'll try harder...I-I PROMISE LUFFY!"
"Shishishishi. Okay. I already decided that anyway Chopper- you're my nakama!."
Chopper smiled, his furry mouth spreading as large as to stretch his cheeks. He was so happy; Luffy agreed! He can stay on the ship with everyone, Luffy can stay now, he said he would! Now he can leave this room and tell everyone the good news, they don't have to be sad anymore because Luffy is back, he's right here-
Chopper turned around, with his smile large and hopeful, his eyes all the same.
No one was there.
The look was still on his face. Chopper stared at the bed, empty. To anyone else, Chopper would most probably still look extremely happy at this moment. But Chopper... he was as empty as that bed, as empty as the room. So empty, he couldn't move.
...Why? Why had this all happened? They were all so happy, laughing and being together. And then they were split up. But it should have been fine, things always turned out okay! So why...why was it different this time?
Why was Luffy not here?
How could it turn out like this?
...Why did Luffy die?
Why was Luffy dead? Luffy was strong, he could defeat anyone, he was going to become the King of the Pirates, he even defeated a God, so where was he, where is Luffy, he's the captain, he's our nakama, he's-
He's Luffy.
The smiled finally, finally faded. But he couldn't cry, not anymore. It hurt too much. So instead, he just stared at the empty bed. Never blinking, never sniffling or moving- he just sat there, as blank as snow.
Chopper is going to become a great doctor who can cure any disease. He's going to save anyone he wants to. He's going to save Luffy. Once he can move again, he's going to go find Luffy- he's out there, he knows he is! Its Luffy, he's not dead, he's just waiting for us to come find him, he must be injured and he's wating for me to come help him!
Just like the lonely child Chopper was, he refused to believe any of it. He's a doctor, he wouldn't accept death so easily.
"Sorry, Chopper." That was it. That was all Luffy could say to the poor animal who had looked up to him so much. One tear- only one- escaped Choppers still face. No-one was there, he could see that, so why did he still have to hear Luffys voice in his head? Why is he still imagining that Luffy is there?
Poor little Chopper never realized that this time, that voice wasn't in his head.
Luffy placed his hand on Choppers head, unfelt.
As if on queue, Chopper finally broke out of his haze, his soft furry face no longer as hard as stone. Tears began to overflow once again, like water finally escaping the cracks of his once hard face.
"Sorry...Chopper."