©DISCLAIMER:

I do not own Fairy Tail.

It belongs to Mashima-sama. I'm just a fan trying to make a story about my OTP!

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We can't.

Juvia's ears seemed to ring and her whole body stiffened. Didn't he just say that he loves her and that he's still waiting, so what's with the negative response? What's going on? Was he just saying things and when she's finally ready to take a step forward he would step back?

Gray sighed as he reluctantly let her go and rubbed his hands on his face out of frustration. "Don't get me wrong Juvia," he breathed out rather heavily. "It's not that I don't want to. I fucking want to be with you again, there's nothing else I would want but that. But we can't just because. There are lot of things to consider. What about Rogue? Ryuu?" Your feelings, he wanted to add but thought better of it. He loves her but he could never ruin a family. He's still a man with honour and he was long done being selfish. If anything, Juvia don't deserve to be judged by other people because of him or the desire to remember everything. He sighed again for who knows how many times just to fill the silence that suddenly engulfed before he spoke again. "If you have a relationship with that man then I cannot let you commit a sin even how much I want you to be mine again."

Juvia remained silent for few more seconds still shocked from his answer and overwhelmed by his explanation. She actually never considered those things before because she was too absorbed by her lost memory dilemma and she was surprised that Gray actually thought about it. Though she knew Rogue won't actually mind it, she was touched that Gray considered Ryuu and her responsibilities to the boy which was not really a problem at all. "You seriously think that Rogue and I have a relationship?"

Gray grimaced. "For a record, you two have a son." Those words left a bitter taste on his tongue. "I might be a jerk but I do care about what that boy will feel about his mother having an affair with another man." Even if he wasn't sure about Ryuu's relationship with Juvia, the fact that Jellal himself said that that boy was Juvia's son by whatever means or circumstances he could not just wreck a child's home. He knew firsthand how it feels to grow up without his parents around. It's never easy even with friends.

Juvia's laugher caught his attention. She knew she should not be laughing but Gray's reaction was so funny, well at least for her because he looked not so pleased with her reaction. "Rouge and I are just friends!" she blurted out trying her best not to burst out laughing again. "The only link I have with Rogue is Ryuu."

"Then who exactly is that kid?"

"Rogue's son."

Gray shut his eyes and bit hi tongue trying to control his annoyance. "I know that. That's pretty obvious and I'm not stupid. What I mean to ask is; who exactly is that kid to you?"

"My son," Juvia automatically replied and before he could ask more she added, "Not biologically, but still, he is my son. That's what he knew and I don't wish for it to change. Ryuu grew up believing that I am his mother because I was always there."

"And why was that?"

"Because I owe Rogue a lot," she replied with a small smile of fondness that Gray didn't like one bit. It's silly but he's jealous. "If it wasn't for him I might not be here talking to you right now."

It took him a full minute to understand what she meant and then realization hit him. "He saved you from your accident?" he asked but he already knew the answer.

Juvia nodded and sat down on the couch. "He was there when it happened. He went after me when my car fell off of the cliff and down the rocky sea. Rogue got me out of my wrecked car before it exploded and he's a doctor. He was quick to give me the first aide avoiding blood loss that helped a lot. If it wasn't him who happened to be there that night who knows what could had happened. Maybe by now I was rotting six feet under or worst, buried in the sea."

Fine, so he owed it to that man that Juvia was alive. "But why do you have to pretend as his son's mother? Where the hell is his mother?"

"Gone," Juvia quickly replied rather harshly like he had said something thoroughly nasty. "And I am not pretending!" there was that mean look in her eyes as she said those words. "Ryuu is my son. Sure I didn't give birth to him but in my heart he is mine. He's one of the reasons I recovered fast from the accident. He was the only steady thing in my rather chaotic life for the past years that I could remember. He is my leverage and if all of these never happened. If our paths didn't crossed again when it did at Jellal-san's wedding I was already considering marrying Rogue. Though I know we will never be more than just friends our mutual respect for each other could make it work for us aside from my uncle really likes him for me."

Such idea was never good for Gray to hear, not even a part of it was appealing to him. "And you were just saying he's just a friend," he sarcastically said even before he could fully think about the words that came out of his mouth. The green eyed monster that had been sleeping inside him finally woken up and it was quick to gnaw on his senses after hearing that she was thinking of marrying another man. It doesn't need to be Rogue specifically; just the thought of Juvia with another man was enough to set him off without a warning. He's always like that when it came to her and five years away from her didn't change that. If anything it only made it worst since there was a brooding insecurity inside him after all the time she was away without a single memory of him and she was with another man playing mother to that man's son.

Annoyed, Juvia looked at him sternly. "I said I was just considering." Which part of that wasn't clear to him? She did not say she was already planning a wedding or choosing a wedding gown.

"The fact that you actu—"

"Look," she irritably cut him off. "What I was trying to say is, if we decided to have a relationship again we won't be committing adultery or that I would be cheating not unless you have a girlfriend right now." Maybe that was it, he must be seeing someone despite all the talk they had about how much he loved and still loves her. It was her turn to feel aggravated. Jealousy surely was a nasty feeling. It's making her want to unreasonably rip someone's throat.

Gray made a face. "I never had a girlfriend after our break up." It had been a long time but the pain that always came along with that fact still sting just the same. Her being in front of him did nothing to ease that since they seemed to be having yet another argument even before they could figure where they stood in their complicated situation and then she just had to think that he's with someone else like replacing her was that easy. "And just so you know, I'd been celibate since," he added unnecessarily but the result was somewhat hilarious.

Her face suddenly burned up. "I don't think I really need to know that!"

He just shrugged casually and flopped down besides her burying his face on her neck that almost made her moan. Just the mere contact of their skin was making her feel all kind of things she should really not be feeling at that time. She snapped back to her senses when he started talking again after a moment of basking in her scent. "I just don't want you thinking that I would find someone else after you. No one could ever replace you in my heart. I solely belong to you." He said those words so solemnly that it made her heart beat extra faster than it already is if that was still possible. "But seriously, didn't Ryuu know that you're not his mom?"

That question momentarily broke the spell between them. "Gray, I don't want to talk about it."

"Why?" his arms wrapped around her again so they were practically cuddling on the couch.

She sighed and pushed herself closer to him as she found it was comfortable and soothing to be so near him and she badly needed some comfort all of a sudden. "Talking about it scares me." That's beyond what she really feels about that issue. "I don't know what I will do if Ryuu's mother take him away from me. I know he's not mine but I love him. I don't want to lose someone to anyone again."

"What do you mean?"

She shook her head. "I don't know where it's coming from but I'm always terrified of losing someone." She really has no idea why but that anxiety had always been looming around her like dark clouds in the sky since the very first day she could remember. It won't just go away.

The arm around her tightened like Gray was reassuring her though he has no clue of what was bugging her. "I don't understand but if Ryuu ever find out the truth I don't think that you will lose him. It seems like you had always been there for him when his real mother was not. From the little interaction that I happened to have with him back at the cathedral, that little boy loves you and he is strongly attached to you."

He's still jealous. It was hard not to feel that way when Rogue got something so close to Juvia's heart that he did not have but he's not as narrow minded as he used to be. It was clear that Ryuu was the only one Juvia doesn't want to lose. She's not in love with the father of the child and he was thankful for that but it won't put him in peace that easily.

"If I wasn't such a jerk before we could have been married by now and maybe even have our own child," he said out of the blue that made Juvia look at him intently. "Do you think so?" she asked sombrely.

"I know so." Of course he does. Didn't he have a ring waiting to be given to her? If only things turned out differently they surely could have been a real family long time ago.

Funny, a little while ago they were almost shouting at each other over something so trivial but after just a moment and few words passed they were there so close to each other thinking about an alternate future they could have if things from the past happened and turned out differently. Strange enough, it's not that hard for Juvia to imagine a family with the man holding her closely like she was so used into day dreaming about a happy family with him. In a way, she knew it would not be perfect but a happy one nonetheless.

"So," she nervously started after a moment of comfortable silence. "What do you think, could we start anew?"

Gray straightened up his back and looked down on her with so much love in his eyes she could drown in it. "I should be the one asking," he said lowly almost like a whisper that only she could hear. "Would you take me back though I'd been so bad in the past? Would you start over again with this stupid man who loves you so much?" there in his eyes what he said was clearly visible. Anyone could say without a doubt that he truly loves her.

She gave him a sweet smile that reached her eyes making them shine like the stars in his eyes. "I don't literally remember anything about you being bad but," she paused cupping his face in her hands lovingly as she leaned closer to him. "I am giving you a chance to make up for that and be a good boyfriend this time so, yes. I want you back and I want you to show me and make me feel just how much I mean to you. I am giving you one last shot so please give it your best this time."

If a big smile could literally split someone's face, Gray's face probably torn in two with the smile he had on his face the moment she said those words and Juvia was sure she saw some tears on the edge of his eyes but before she could say something about that he was already kissing her. All the words she was about to say was drowned in her mouth by that sinfully sweet lips of his. "I love you."

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YoseiNoAme