A/N
Hey guys! Thank you so much for the reaction to the previous chapter, it really made me want to push ahead with this fic and get this one out there. It's another one full of dialogue, but I hope that when you read it in full you will understand why.

From now on I'm going to be updating this fic twice-weekly. One chapter on Wednesday evenings and one on Sunday evenings (late afternoon/early-evening for those of you in the USA and late-evening edging into the night for the fellow Brits). I'd like to think I can stick to that schedule, but if I can't then I apologise in advance.

So, without further ado, here's chapter 10!
Ira 3

Albus wasn't quite sure he wanted to believe what he'd just heard.

"What do you mean, she wasn't so lucky?" He whispered into his dad's shoulder, knowing he wouldn't like the answer, whatever it was.

"She didn't survive the attack." There seemed to be no emotion in Harry's voice as he told the story, just emptiness.

"Who was she?"

"The neighbour's daughter, Louise. They were muggles."

Albus fought not to let out a gasp.

"It's so rare that a muggle survives a werewolf attack, and at that age it was next to impossible. When your mother and I got there she was still alive, but only just. There was nothing we could do."

"And James?" Albus muttered.

"He was all but unconscious, it wasn't... nice, Al." Albus felt his father's chin ruffle his hair as he shook his head, "your mother and I kept it from you for a reason. You don't want to know the details, I promise you."

Albus understood his parents' intentions, but he did want to know the details. Surly after everything they'd been through his father had realised that keeping secrets from Albus would always result in him getting more distant, and pushing himself away.

"How old was she?" Albus asked, "Louise, I mean."

"She was five," there was sadness in Harry's voice, now, "the same age as James."

"What happened to her family?"

"The Ministry wiped their memories." Harry sighed.

This stung Albus. It made him sick to think that an innocent girl had been killed, and even more so to know that all memory of her existence had been wiped from the face of the Earth.

"Albus I hope you can understand that what happened that night, it was nothing more than a terrible tragedy. There really is no-one to blame, there's no guilty party." Harry broke the hug and looked Albus in the eyes, "I think that's what your brother is finding most difficult. He has nobody to take out his anger on."

Albus nodded. He could accept that James had been going through a hard time, but what he didn't understand was why he'd directed all his cruelty at him, and only him. Still, he had enough sense to know that now wasn't the time to push the subject.

"Thanks for telling me," he said to his father with a small smile.

Harry returned the smile and squeezed his son's arm.

They sat together for a few minutes, the only sound coming from the winter rain as it bounced of the windows of the Potters' detached house.

"Hey..." They were interrupted by James's appearance, he was holding a steaming mug in each hand.

"Tea," he muttered, "a peace offering."

He placed the two drinks on the table and shifted awkwardly from one foot to the other. It didn't take Harry long to notice that there were only two cups. He stood up.

"I'll leave you boys to it, I fancy a bite to eat" he offered, collecting his newspaper as he headed out of the dining room. The Potters' kitchen was on the opposite side of the house, but even so, James closed the door behind his father - what they needed here was privacy.

Albus eyed his brother cautiously. The anger that had been there less than twenty minutes ago had vanished, but he still wasn't back to the James of old. He could sense his discomfort.

"Can we talk?" The older brother asked.

"You have until I finish this to convince me you're not a total dickhead," Albus threatened, motioning to one of the mugs of tea as he said it.

James gave a nod.

"Can I sit down?" he asked.

Albus shrugged, and within seconds his elder brother was slumped by his side.

"Look - Al... I'm really, really sorry about what I said." He sighed.

"Not good enough." Was Albus's response.

"I know."

And there was silence.

"You're not trying very hard," Albus warned as he took the first sip of his drink.

"I don't know what to say." James admitted, and he took a gulp of his own tea, "I see dad's told you about Teddy."

Albus nodded.

"He told me enough," he answered.

"I didn't know anything about it until a few months ago."

"Yeah, when you turned 17, Dad said."

"Yeah..."

"So was that when you decided you'd rather it were me who was dead?" Albus asked bluntly, "or did you already know that?"

"No!" James's expression was a mix of outrage and guilt, "I didn't mean what I said this morning, Al, I swear."

"If you say so." Albus knew that James was telling the truth, but he was going to have to try harder than that if he wanted his forgiveness.

"I do, Al. It's the truth."

"I get it, you know," Albus began, "you found out your dead brother was a werewolf who killed a girl and nearly killed you - I understand why you're angry. But what I don't get is how you go from being pissed off about that to spending months treating me like dirt, and telling me you wished I were dead."

There was another awkward silence, and when James finally broke it his voice was trembling slightly.

"It's not that simple, bro..."

"Then tell me why," Albus demanded.

"It's just... there's more to it."

James looked more uncomfortable that Albus had ever seen him.

"Do you know what Professor Dabbs told us last term? That only people with a pure, human soul can move on when they die. They say that some souls are eternally dammed, and that they get stuck in limbo for eternity." James was starring at the half empty mug in his lap, "like centaurs, merpeople... and werewolves."

Oh. Albus hadn't expected that. He'd assumed James was sad because of Teddy's death. It hadn't occured to him that he might be concerned about what came after that.

"I don't think it works like that James," he said, and he realised that, although he hadn't meant it to, to his tone has softened, "that only goes for people who've destroyed their soul intentionally. Like murderers and people who, you know, make horcruxes and stuff..."

They both knew who he was referring to, and the comparison wasn't comforting for James. Albus himself realised that he'd been a little tactless, and chose to say no more.

"There's a book, by Emerett Picardy, " James continued, "and it says the same thing. 'A werewolf's soul is dammed for eternity'."

"Yeah, but James-"

"Do you know what the book's called?" James interrupted, before answering his own question, "Lupine Lawlessness: Why Lycanthropes Don't Deserve to Live."

James was starring at the ceiling now, his face full of anguish.

"That book sounds like it's full of shit." Albus scoffed, "you know dad always says that the Ministry doesn't understand death, nor time, not really. They know more than the muggles, but that's not saying much. The only real evidence that they have of limbo even existing is from what dad told them he'd experienced after Voldemort tried to kill him, and he even said he could've been imagining that..."

James made to open his mouth, but Albus hadn't finished. He was on a roll, but he wasn't sure who he was trying to convince now - James, or himself.

"Annnnnd, dad said he saw Teddy's real dad with that stone thing he's always banging on about-"

"The Resurrection stone," James filled in the gap. They'd both heard the story a thousand times.

"Exactly. If werewolves couldn't pass on then how could he have been there?" Albus was quite impressed with his reasoning. It seemed flawless, but he still had more, he was beginning to feel a little philosophical, "you know sometimes I think the muggles might be right."

"What do you mean?" Suddenly James seemed more interested in listening than speaking.

"You know, that stuff they say about God, and heaven and hell. I'm not saying that there's some great wizard living in the clouds who decides who goes to the good place and who goes to the bad place, but maybe it really is based on the good that's inside a person. Maybe that's what decides who moves on to the after life or not."

James nodded.

"That would explain why Teddy's dad was able to but Voldemort wasn't, right?" Albus asked.

"I guess..."

"Exactly. So stop worrying about that, James. I promise you Teddy's in the afterlife with his mom and dad and..." he stopped for a moment, feeling a little awkward as he realised James had completely driven the conversation away from his original question. "It still doesn't explain why your problem was just with me, though, James."

Albus fixed an expectant glare on his brother. He'd seen Rose do it many times, and it always seemed to work for her.

His brother let out a long sigh and pulled his knees up to his chest. Albus was sure he felt him lean every-so-slightly towards him, as if he wanted them to be closer, but he wasn't sure.

"I think you're right," he said plainly.

"What?"

"I think you're right about good people moving on and bad people getting stuck in limbo. Like the muggles say... actually dad had already told me that. That's not why I was angry with you," James paused for a moment before continuing, he was choosing his words carefully, "you know what else the muggles say, right?"

Albus shook his head. The muggles said lots of things, the great majority of which were completely irrelevant at that particular moment in time.

"They have their own ideas about who has a soul and who doesn't, about who goes to heaven and who is dammed for eternity."

"Yeah, so...?"

"They say witches go to hell, and atheists. Thieves and whores too."

"And?"

"And you know, they say... well they say gay people are sinners," James whispered, "so I guess they think they go to hell."

Albus froze. Literally. He felt like his entire body had been plunged into ice cold water, but the sensation came from the inside out.

"That's why I was weird with you," James admitted in a voice that was little more than a whisper, "I thought Teddy's sole was dammed for eternity, and I didn't want that happening to two of the people I love."

"That's ridiculous," Albus replied, trying to keep his voice as calm and matter-of-fact as it had been when he was ridiculing the same claims made by wizard-kind against werewolves, "and irrelevant."

"It is ridiculous," James agreed, "I realise that now. But I'm not sure it's irrelevant."

Albus didn't know what to say, and so he took a final, long sip of his tea before continuing.

"I don't even know any gay people, so I don't see why that made you angry at me." He was, obviously, lying, and James could see straight through it, "there's no reason that a crazy, muggle theory about people going to hell should have anything to do with me, whatsoever."

"OK..." James said, unsure of whether or not to push the matter.

"If this is because of what you heard Potty Chapstick saying about me then, well, you can just forget it. I am not seeing Scorpius, James, I promise." Regardless of his feelings for Scorpius, he was telling the truth now. They were not together, and they never would be. James, however, must have noticed the change in Albus's voice. Because now he seemed to believe what he was saying.

"Right," he nodded, "but not seeing Scorpius and not being gay are two different things."

He gave his brother a sideways glance, but it wasn't returned.

"Al, if you're gay you can just tell me," he finally said, shrugging his arms in an exaggerated way as he did so, "I promise I won't kick off again."

Albus didn't speak. He just starred at his empty cup.

"Al?" James nudged him, "Al come on, speak to me. You know there's nothing wrong with being gay, loads of people are gay. Look at Dumbledore! Some people say he was ga-"

"Do you wanna stop saying gay, James?" Albus snapped, "you've said it about ten times in the last thirty seconds!"

"Because it's normal! I realise that now," his brother answered, "there's nothing wrong with saying it."

Albus could feel the same old anger building inside him once again, only this time it was stronger. Why did James have do butt in? What gave him the right to interrogate Albus like this mere seconds after he'd forgiven him for wishing him dead.

He's looking out for you, a voice in the back of his mind whispered.

He's looking for an easy excuse for what he said to me this morning, more like, Albus replied, mentally.

It would be nice to have someone to talk to, though, wouldn't it? The voice again.

Yes. Was Albus's only answer.

Then, as he felt more tears welling in his eyes, he chastised himself for crying again.

"Al," James leaned his arm on his brother's shoulder as he noticed the tears, "I know you're gay. There's no point lying. If you keep trying to keep a secret that everyone already knows then eventually it'll begin to eat you up, you'll end up self-destructing. You know that, right?"

"Wh-What do you mean everyone?" Albus stuttered, panic in eyes.

"No, no, not literally everyone. I just meant in general. I haven't told anyone, I just kept it to myself." James reassured him, "and I won't tell anyone, of course not."

Albus nodded.

"So... does that mean...?" James's words hung in the air, he was waiting for Albus to finish them, or at least nod.

Albus shook his head.

"Al." James pushed.

Still nothing.

Then, after a second of deliberation, he nodded.

"Ok." James nodded too, "that's cool."

Albus tried to wipe away the tears that were rolling down his cheeks. He wasn't sobbing, he was't even really sad, embarrassed yes, but not sad. He couldn't honestly ascertain where the tears were coming from.

"Are you sure you don't want to, you know, actually say it out loud?" James asked, "I think it would make you feel better."

Albus shook his head again. Had James not already done enough? Telling him he wished he were dead and then practically forcing him to admit that he was gay?

"Just leave it. Please." Albus answered.

"OK. But just to confirm-" James began again.

For God's sake, Albus cursed to himself.

"Yes James! I'm gay! OK?" He shouted, anger, fear, shame and hatred all running through him at the same time.

As soon he did it he realised what he'd done. The whole house must have heard him. Within seconds his father would be in the room wanting to know why he'd just heard his always-disappointing son screaming his perversions to the world.

He imagined the look on his face. This would surely be too much for him to take.

"Shit." Albus muttered as he put his head in his hands, "Shit. Shit. Shit."

What was he going to do now? If his dad found out then his mother would too, and they were bound to tell Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron. If word got to Rose then the whole of Gryffindor house would know, and then it would only be a matter of time before the news got back to Scorpius.

He considered running away. He still had the trace on him, but he was well-accustomed to the muggle world. He could definitely make it on his own without magic, at least for the next two years-

"Umm, Al.." James interrupted, a sly smile forming on his lips.

Albus didn't look at his brother, he'd almost forgotten he was there.

"I may have put a silencing charm on the door." His smile grew.

"You did what?" Albus's head shot up.

"I put a silencing charm on the door," he replied simply, "I had a feeling this was gonna get deep, so I thought it was better to be safe than sorry."

Albus nodded weakly as relief spread through him.

"To tell you the truth I thought I might have to viciously murder you," James smirked and winked at Albus, he was clearly back to his normal self, "I thought I'd have more time to hide the body if mom and dad didn't hear the screams."

Albus gave a small smile, but it didn't reach his eyes.

"But seriously, I have no problem with you being gay, and I don't think dad will either."

"Right."

Albus said nothing more. He didn't want his dad to know, why, he didn't even want James to know but he'd been left with little choice. He simply sat back in the sofa and breathed slowly.

"I suppose this means I'm gonna have to hug you." James asked with mock trepidation in his voice.

"There's really no need." Albus replied.

James hugged him anyway, and Albus didn't reject it.

OK, Albus thought to himself, maybe this isn't so bad after all. I'm gay. James knows I'm gay. It's no big deal.

But despite what he told himself, all he could think of was Scorpius.

Scorpius and how he was going to hate him when he found out about this.

He sighed into James's shoulder as yet more tears threatened to escape him.

"By the way," James began, "Merry Christmas."

"Yeah, Merry Christmas." Albus replied.

A/N
So guys, thanks to those of you who've made it this far! This was a difficult chapter to write as the dramatic writer in me wanted to cut out most of the dialogue and have some action, but I wanted to try and make this as true to reality as I could. I have had the fortune of having two individuals, whose situations were not too dissimilar to Albus's, confide in me about their sexuality. In both cases, they already had a close family member who knew their secret, and they had accepted them with little more than a shrug and a cuddle. That's what I wanted to reflect here with James and Albus's awkward little heart-to-heart.

Now: I know that this is not the case for every LGBTQ+ person out there. It's just a coincidence that all the people I've known who have come out had already confided in someone else, and they've always told me that their first kind of "coming out" was far less dramatic and much less of an ordeal than their actual, major coming out.

So, why am I explaining this? Well, it's because I know that it is far less interesting to read about James basically just saying ''you're gay albus, I know, so now cry and i'll hug you" than it would be for, let's say, James finding a love letter Albus had written to Scorpius and attacking him, hitting him in the chest with dark magic and Albus dying in Harry's arms. I could have written it like that, but I much prefer having a more sombre chapter, knowing that it's a reflection of, at the very least, some people's reality, and hopefully they can connect with that or even be comforted by it.

Thanks for reading. The next chapter will should be up on Wednesday evening, and it will be full of happy Christmas-y stuff. Oh, and Scorpius will be featured heavily, to make up for the last two chapter.

Thanks for reading, and as always please feel free to leave a comment, I love receiving them!

3
Ira

PS: This chapter will more than likely be re-edited when I have the time. I'm not the best dialogue writer in the world, and when I have a chapter like this that's so full of it I struggle to keep it flowing naturally. In the coming weeks I'll come back and read it through again and make changes as and when I find problems. Thanks for understanding, and I hope you can enjoy the chapter anyway :)