AN: The snack of gaming is thus, drumroll please. (Drumroll) And the chosen snack is...Freshly cooked, yet cooled to perfection, hot pockets and/or pizza rolls!

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Percy Jackson and the Olympians.

Sun's Heir, Death's Guardian

X

"You!" Naruto growled as he reached for his bow. He suddenly found himself frozen and the world around him turned red and black. The other members of the quest became colorless before fading away into nothing, leaving Naruto alone.

"(Ah, ah, ah,)" the man with his one red eye revealed chided as he waggled a gloved finger, "(That's not how you great old friends,) Naruto."

"You're not my friend you sadistic psychopath!" the blonde spat as his eyes narrowed, "My father warned me about you!"

"He-he-he," the man giggled as he stepped forward into the red-lit world, wearing something similar to Konohagakure's ANBU armor. His right eye was uncovered, and this person had a Sharingan eye in the right socket, three black tomoe spinning within the red iris. His face was youthful, yet pained and the man had raven hair that was just as spikey as the blond's used to be. An old and scarred Konohagakure headband covered his left eye, similar to his old sensei Kakashi. The feature Naruto recognized from his father's description, however, was the orange spiral mask hanging at his waist.

"I'm sure he did," the man replied, his transition to English seeming flawless, save for the barest accent that Naruto shared. The man's mouth turned upwards in a cracked smile, "That father of yours is quite the prophet, though he seemed to have faltered when he was the Namikaze."

"What do you want from me, Uchiha?" Naruto asked, his eyes narrowed, "Or are you here under a master's orders?"

"You're just as gifted in sight as your father," the man chuckled insanely, "However, you're just as blind! I come with an offer, Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze. Give me the power of the Nine Tailed Fox, and I can ensure that the Crooked One never rises again."

Naruto felt his throat dry and a cold chill go up his spine. To ensure that the Crooked One never rose. It was tempting...very tempting.

Naruto then had a vision of worldwide panic, his friends from his old home and his new one now lying dead before him. Fire was rising around the remains of a city, most likely New York. His father and aunt's chariots were falling towards the ground. Olympus was crumbling, but it wasn't due to the Titans.

A giant creature with ten limbs protruding from its backside was smacking the Big Three's corpses around. A giant eye, red and ringed like Nagato's, but with three tomoe on each ring was suddenly in his line of vision. The eye narrowed and an infuriated voice hissed out two words.

FREE ME!

Naruto gasped after Thalia slapped him upside the head. He grabbed at the spot and then looked around. The room's colors had returned and the other members of the sextet had been unfrozen. All of it had been a dream, just like before. Just like with Itachi several years ago.

"(I await your response,) Naruto-kun," the man said before a giant void opened up behind him and he stepped through it. Naruto glared at the spot before holding his head and glaring at the one that struck him.

"What the Hell, Thalia-chan?" Naruto asked the girl that was returning his glare with equal amounts of determination/anger.

Her anger peaked and Thalia exploded, "Who are the people that attacked the Kelp Head over here? Who was that? I'm sick of all this cloak and dagger shit, Naruto! Tell me what happened after you left!"

Naruto's jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed, "I don't have to tell you anything, Thalia Grace."

"We aren't leaving until you do!" Thalia shot back, undeterred. Grover and Percy exchanged glances of concern and worry as they heard thunder start to boom.

"The Hell we aren't!" Phoebe replied, butting into the conversation, "Lady Artemis needs to be at the Winter Solstice meeting!"

"Stay out of it, Hunter! This is between us!" Thalia snapped, causing a lightning bolt to strike down nearby.

This is getting out of hand, Naruto thought as he took note of the storm brewing outside. Either Rai-Jiji is listening in on us, or Thalia's gifts are linked to more than just lightning.

"You know what, Thalia, I will tell you, but not right now," Naruto gave, praying to his father and grandfather that it would sate the girl's anger.

It didn't.

"No! It's always later with you! I want answers now!" Thalia demanded, almost childishly, as she rounded on him.

Ok, so she's more like Rai-jiji than I anticipated, Naruto thought before he realized something, Cripes, she was turned into a tree when she was what? 12? 13? Did she mentally mature or just physically?...Is she...? Please, whoever's listening to this, Aphrodite, Auntie Arte, Athena, Hera, or even you Hestia; please someone tell me that it isn't that time of the month!

And sure enough, he was reassured...

"This is why I told thou that men art hopeless! Thou should've joined us when I asked, that way thine feelings wouldn't be risking Lady Artemis' life!"

...Thanks to Zoë's big mouth.

"You wanna run that by me again?" Thalia asked coolly. Naruto, Grover and even Percy all had one thought.

Catfight!

"Thy feelings for Uzumaki and...vice versa I believe the term is, are making thee act irrational," Zoë continued with a frown before her nose scrunched up, "Tis almost as bad as a daughter of Aphrodite."

"Oh you are so dead, Nightshade!" Thalia snarled as she tried to rush the girl with her fist cocked back. Naruto slipped behind the enraged raven-haired girl before pinching a point at her neck, making her fall unconscious and catching her with his arm. Sighing in relief, the blond then picked the unconscious teen up and carried her towards the doors, with the other four quest goers following.

"She's going to be real pissed when she wakes up, isn't she?" Percy asked his friend quietly as they followed their apparent leader.

Grover bleated as his nerves started to calm down, "Yeah...Maybe Naruto should just kiss her and see if that helps?"

Percy stared at his friend with disbelief, "...Dude, even I know that's a dumb idea."

"Worth a try, though, right?" the satyr said sheepishly. Inwardly he thought, so much for that plan. Man, Annabeth better not win this bet. I really want more tin cans and I don't have a lot of drachma left on me!

Percy looked ahead and "Why's she so mad, anyway? Does she like...Like Naruto or something?"

This time it was Grover who stared. The Satyr shook his head with a sigh."...Sometimes I forget why I'm your friend, Percy. And it's questions like that that remind me that you need the occasional smack upside the head. Like so."

"Ow! You could've just said yes!" complained the Son of Poseidon as he rubbed the back of his head after the hard thwack he received.

Grover merely shrugged, "That's not as fun. Besides, Annabeth would've done the same thing."

"...You've got a point there," the teen admitted before looking at the blond, "What's she see in him though? He's an ass, secretive, and well, to be honest he...he reminds me of Luke."

Grover quickly covered Percy's mouth and frowned at the boy. He looked at a still walking Naruto, who was oblivious to the world as he carried Thalia back towards the car, before looking back and warning, "Don't ever let him hear you say that, Percy. Naruto wasn't...He wasn't always like he is now. Time and circumstances change people. He might be a jerk...Ok, he kind of is a jerk only to you, but...You're not exactly the best example of a camper."

"What do you mean?" Percy asked as Grover let him go.

"I'm saying this as your friend, Percy," Grover said softly as they slowly resumed walking, "Some of the things back at camp made me think. You're really not educated in our world, but it's not your fault. You might have been...sheltered, more than the other demigods. It's...kind of unfair if you think about it. Both to you and the others."

"What do you mean, sheltered? You mean like how we avoided monsters?" Percy shuddered at the thought of his mother's ex.

"Kind of...But the fact that your mother allowed you to remain ignorant of so much...Percy, if you had more information on some Kindly Ones, if you...If your mother pushed you to pay attention in school...can you say you would've remained hidden until you were twelve?"

The Son of Poseidon had no response for that. He thought about all he had been through, all that had happened on his quests. As he thought it over, Naruto's words at camp came back to mind.

"In short, you haven't learned an important lesson: The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few."

I am...was selfish...but...

"You do understand the lesson I cherish the most: 'Those who break the rules are trash, but those who abandon their precious people are worse than trash'."

Those are words that everyone should live by, Percy mused before looking at Naruto's back, Why are you so secretive, though?

"C'mon, Jackson! Let's get a move on!" Naruto called over his shoulder, "We still need to go west!"

They entered the lot to a depressing sight. Naruto's new Challenger was in flames, and the cause of it was another face that got a reaction from Naruto. This one was one of betrayal, anger, excitement and disbelief all at once. Percy however groaned at the sight of another headband wearing person.

"K-Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto whispered. The man turned towards him and his lone eye widened in surprise. Unlike the last person with a covered eye, this man had grey hair that defied gravity and his face was hidden from the bridge of his nose down thanks to a navy blue mask that blended in with his shirt and slacks. He had a olive green flak jacket much like Lee and had two fingerless gloves with metal plates on the back of them. His legs were taped from the middle of his shin down to where his sandals began.

Naruto quickly fumbled his hands together while still cradling Thalia and made a clone. He handed the girl in his arms over to his duplicate before taking a step towards the man.

Kakashi recovered from his initial shock and gave his old student an eye smile and a laid back wave, "Ohayo, Naruto!"

"Uzumaki, who is this man?" Zoë asked quietly as she and Phoebe prepared their bows.

"My old teacher," Naruto replied just as softly. He stood twice an arms' length away from Kakashi, both now tense and prepared to jump.

"(We've been very worried about you) Naruto," Kakashi finally said. Naruto nodded in understanding.

"(I've...been busy with family issues,)" the blond replied before he frowned, "(I can't go back just yet, Sensei)."

"(I figured as much,)" Kakashi sighed out before he leaned against the charred remains of the car, "(But Tsunade-sama won't like it if we just parted and went our separate ways without an explanation.)"

"(Family business,)" Naruto replied without haste, making Kakashi blink. Naruto bit his lip, "(Dad's...He...I can't say, but whatever deal you have with your current employer, you have to drop. They're bad people, Sensei)."

"Hm...(Well, I suppose I should send a message back to Tsunade-sama, then)" Kakashi drawled before he narrowed his eye at the teens behind the blond, "(Your...squad?)"

"(You could say that,)" the blond answered as his hand slowly reached behind his back, "(Where's yours?)"

"(They're around...)" Kakashi drawled, glancing at the ground and back at Naruto pointedly.

"Uzumaki! Stop speaking gibberish and let's get a move on!" Zoë ordered as she and Phoebe prepared to cover the blonde.

"Gimme a minute!" Naruto called back over his shoulder, not once taking his eyes of Kakashi, "(...Sensei, why did you blow up my car?)"

"(To be completely honest with you,) Naruto, (that wasn't my fault,)" Kakashi said as his left hand slowly came out of his right pocket. The jonin's eye stared at him with mirth, "(I didn't know it was yours. My team tracked it.)"

"(Right...)" drawled the blond in disbelief, before he called over his shoulder, "Run! Run now! It's a trap!"

As he said those three words, skeletons shot up from the ground with machine guns in their hands. The four conscious members of the quest turned and followed the clone out of the parking lot, running towards the Smithsonian.

Naruto meanwhile built chakra in his legs before leaping up as the skeletons fired, shooting themselves but not destroying each other. The blond's right arm came up in an attempt to defend himself from a sudden kick.

"(Why is it you look seventeen,) Naruto?" Kakashi asked as he and Naruto traded blows while they descended to the ground. The man had to block Naruto's retaliating heel kick with his arm before he could continue questioning the blond, "(Is that your mother's genes flowing through your veins?)"

"(That's a secret, Sensei,)" Naruto countered as they landed and continued to trade blows. Noticing that the man wasn't revealing his 'secret' weapon, the blond asked incredulously, "(We're sparring now?)"

"(Meh, humor me,)" the grey haired shinobi replied with a closed eye, "(It's been seven years and I want to see how much stronger you've gotten.)"

Naruto ducked under a kick and threw a left punch, which was caught in his ex-sensei's hand. The blond rolled with the attempted shoulder throw that followed and landed on his feet. He spun around to return to the offensive, only to miss Kakashi as the man leapt away. Naruto pursued, pushing his foot down into the earth, cracking the blacktop as he jumped at the older shinobi. Kakashi ducked under his first flying punch, but was hit in the side with the following left hook.

The grey haired man released a gasp as he kicked his old student away. Kakashi cradled his side and wheezed as he felt for a fracture.

Even though we're both holding back, the man mused before he went into several hand seals, "Katon: Goukakyuu no Jutsu (Fire Release: Giant Fireball Technique)!"

Placing a curled pointer and thumb in front of his mouth, Kakashi inhaled and exhaled, a large ball of fire was sent flying in the blonde's direction. Naruto crossed his arms in front of him as he jumped back. After the explosion and the smoke cleared, the jonin was shocked to see his old student standing there with his golden brown jacket intact, while slightly smoking.

So glad I grabbed this when I could, Naruto thought before flying through hand seals of his own, "Katon: Housenka no Jutsu (Fire Release: Phoenix Flower Technique)!"

As the blond exhaled several bullets of fire, Kakashi's lone eye widened in thought; Katon?!

The jonin ducked and weaved under the multiple bursts of fire, getting slightly scorched from the close calls. He narrowed his eye as Naruto stood still with his eyes closed. Kakashi's lone eye widened in fear and surprise as he realized what was happening.

Though his thoughts were just a tad off.

Under his breath, Naruto whispered, "God of the Wild, master of the land; grant me access to your power, so that I may join my friends again!"

His eyelids gained orange eyeliner, and his eyes became solid golden orbs with rectangular pupils. Naruto's fists clenched and he ran forward, creating small cracks in the ground with each step. Forced onto the defensive, Kakashi crossed his arms as a fist went flying faster than his original eye could track, impacting with the two limbs and breaking them. The jonin cried out in pain as he was sent skidding, before he fell to his back. He groaned in pain, earning a look of sympathy from his old student.

"(You're stronger than last time we sparred,)" Kakashi gasped out. As Naruto reached down to help him up, the jonin shook his head, "(No, you have to go. Hurry, before my employer's strange summons hurt your friends.)"

Naruto pulled his hand back before his eyes widened, "The skeletons..."

He turned to leave before calling back over his shoulder, "Sensei...(Before you go home, read up on what the natives call Greek Mythology.)"

Kakashi blinked in confusion, but before he could ask why, Naruto had bounded off with another chakra leap. Kakashi groaned as he fell to his back before chuckling.

"Well...I could always find a new book," he said in English with a thick accent.

Naruto landed hard on the ground before he felt Pan's Blessing, as he called his new version of Sage Mode, wear off. Panting, he sniffed the air like his aunt had taught him before he turned left, "The subway? Alright..."

He focused on the station that was close by before vanishing in a flash of light. Immediately after he reappeared, he was assaulted by the memory of the clone. The group was being hounded and Phoebe had been hit in the back of her leg by a stray bullet. Thalia was drowsily waking up before the clone was dispersed by a shot to the back, so he didn't know the current situation.

"Hang on!" He murmured to himself as he burst through a locked door. Following the sounds of clanging and war cries, he came across his group. Phoebe and Thalia had teamed up, with Thalia acting as her shield while Phoebe rested and covered from a distance. The skeletons seemed to have lost their guns and were using medieval weapons.

Zoë was practically dancing with how she used her hunting blades. Though each of her strikes were futile, as the skeletons just regenerated whatever she cut off, be it a rib or a hand.

Percy and Grover were copying Thalia and Phoebe, with Grover's miscellaneous junk being tossed at the undead while Percy hacked away at them. Naruto looked around for an escape and found it. A final train was boarding for the night, the underground locomotive was steaming at the wheels and preparing to leave.

Well now...There's an idea, Naruto mused, But first...a distraction. Hope Grover and Thalia-chan remember this one.

"Hey boneheads!" Naruto called out to the skeletons as he channeled chakra throughout his body, "You all look a little pasty, you know what you need?"

Thalia frowned as she recalled the phrase, but couldn't place its meaning. Grover, who was more used to remembering under pressure, widened his eyes before he dropped and covered them, "EVERYONE COVER YOUR EYES AND GET DOWN!"

The skeletons had their attention on the blonde that was making himself an easy target. Naruto grinned and shut his own eyes as he started to glow. Internally, he prayed that this would work like it did before, but without the god-awful pain that followed it last time. The other members of his quest had followed Grover's example, shielding their eyes, but Percy had an eye open to a squint, curiosity getting the best of him. His eye was forced shut when Naruto's light outdid that of the faulty lights of the subway.

"Y'all need a tan! SOLAR FLARE!" Naruto cried as he released his built up chakra and became a living explosion of heat and light. The skeletons shrieked in pain as the pure chakra coursed over their bodies, reducing them to ash. Naruto kept flooding the area with superheated light for a good minute before it died down and he fell to his hands and knees.

Naruto bit his lip to keep from screaming in pure agony as his body felt like it was on fire. His arms wrapped around his sides and he groaned in pain.

DAD YOU CAN GO SUCK BALLS! He thought angrily as his body burned from the inside out. He felt someone grab the underside of his arm and pull him up.

"C'mon, Naruto!" Grover's voice urged, "We have to go."

"Where do we go?" Percy asked, "And what was that?"

"The train!" Naruto gasped out, "Quick! Jackson, give me a hand. Thalia-chan, help Zoë-chan with Phoebe! We have to go. It won't keep them down long!"

"They're ashes, what do you mean they won't be down long?" Percy asked in confusion. Naruto cracked an eye open and glared at the boy.

"Are they golden dust?" the blond hissed through his teeth.

"No...Oh...Oh!" Percy felt like he should smack himself in the head.

"Glad you understand," Naruto grunted as he was carried towards the train. As the group boarded the ashes of a skeleton slowly began to reform and a blackened bone hand clenched into a fist.

It had been three trains later, a total of five hours between their train hopping, before the group of six had disembarked into a run-down train station somewhere near a freight yard. Naruto, now recovered thanks to his healing abilities, was walking with Percy and Thalia while Zoë helped Phoebe and Grover trailed after them like a lost puppy, the three latter hiding their shivers due to their cloaks and fur in Grover's case.

"So that was something your dad blessed you with?" Percy summed up after Naruto explained his photokinesis, "You can become a giant light bulb?"

"Ha! Good one, Kelp head," Thalia snickered out. Naruto glared at her before he turned to Percy once again.

"Yes, and I can bend the light around me so that I become invisible to the naked eye," Naruto explained as he demonstrated before he returned to a visible state, "The Invisible Man was based off my brother, H.G. Wells', antics."

"H.G. Wells?" Percy repeated. Naruto groaned.

"The author of War of the Worlds? The Time Machine? The Island of Dr. Moreau? Seriously? You've never picked up a book in your life?" the blonde asked, appalled. While he originally disliked reading due to his own dyslexia, he had picked it up shortly after he integrated himself in the real world. He once joked with Annabeth that maybe he was the secret love child between Apollo and Athena due to his newfound love for books.

"Dyslexic," Percy replied only to be slapped upside the head, "Ow! What the Hell?"

"It's not an excuse, Jackson," Naruto chided with a frown as he lowered his hand, "I'm Dyslexic, too, and I managed to overcome it. Sure, I have the occasional struggle, but I can figure it out if you give me a bit of time."

"I guess I just don't like reading," Percy mumbled with a shrug. Naruto rolled his eyes.

"Better pick it up if you want Annabeth to like you," murmured the blond jokingly as he walked ahead of the two. As he did so, both Percy and Thalia started to shiver.

"Why's it so cold all of a sudden?" Percy asked through chattering teeth. Naruto looked back and laughed once he put it together.

"Sorry about that," He apologized while scratching the back of his head. He walked back to them and they felt the chill vanish, "Thanks to dad, I'm hot. Literally and figuratively."

"Like a walking furnace," Thalia murmured as she inched closer to the blond, "What about the others?"

"I'm not a campfire," Naruto admitted before taking note of a sudden warmth to his right, "But I'm sure he's willing to share."

To the right of the group was a bundled up homeless man, his features hidden by a hood and seated in front of a fire. A partially toothless smile was sent in the teens' direction. He reached out with a wrinkled hand and patted a stray newspaper as well as the ground.

"C'mon an' join me, kiddies," he said with a whistling voice, "Plenty o' room 'round the fire."

"G-great!" Grover exclaimed with a chatter as he sat down on the man's right, "M-My H-h-hooves a-are s-shaking!"

"Feet!" Percy hastily corrected as he took a seat next to his friend. Naruto sat next to him, followed by Thalia, then Phoebe, and finally Zoë took the spot closest to the homeless man's left.

"T-This i-is g-great," Phoebe complained with a shiver as she bundled up in her cloak, "S-Stuck i-in g-gods only know w-with two boys a-and a beast!"

"Hey, I resent that remark!" Naruto called out with a frown, "Percy can't help his father's ingrained instincts!"

"Hey!" Percy replied with a slight blush.

"She was talking about thyself, Uzumaki," Zoë said with a smirk. Naruto pouted.

"Meanie."

"She has a point though," Thalia chimed in with a frown, "At this rate, we'll never get where we need to be."

"An' where would that be, girly?" the homeless man asked curiously.

Naruto replied almost instantly, making the others look at him oddly as he gave out the information, "We need to go west and fast. Any ideas?"

"West, huh? Sure, I know a way...you could always follow the sun!" the homeless man chimed with a mad cackle afterwards. The group eyed the homeless man oddly and he sighed before pointing at a run down advertisement.

"Sunwest Line, huh?" Naruto replied in disbelief as he stared at the homeless man, "So...what's your name again?"

"Oh, they call me Fred," the homeless man said with a smile. Naruto merely sighed and scratched the back of his neck before the group decided to take the Sunwest Line. The blond only wondered how much trouble 'Fred' was going to be in. He noticed Percy look back to thank 'Fred', only for the campsite to be missing.

Meanwhile, on Olympus the goddess of Love was searching through notes she had jotted down. Eventually, she stopped and pulled at her hair.

"Ugh! Damn it!" she swore before storming out of her temple, "Where is he? EROS! EROS, GET OUT HERE!"

A child with a Nerf gun stopped shooting at some nymphs before running over to her. He wore a red shirt and black shorts, his feet covered by white running shoes. He stopped at her side and smiled, "Hello Mother."

"Don't you 'Hello Mother' me!" Aphrodite scolded the boy, "Where is my Percabeth book?"

"Percabeth...Oh, you mean the Seaweed boy and the Owl girl scrapbook you're making?" Eros asked after a moment, "I dunno. Maybe Ares has it. He did say he was running out of demigod pictures to use for his dart board."

Aphrodite scowled and stormed towards the War God's temple, intent on getting her book back from her lover. As she stormed, she walked passed a very empty temple of Apollo. That got Aphrodite to stop and walk back. She poked her head in and looked around.

"He never leaves his temple unguarded...humph, well if Artemis didn't slack off, he wouldn't be so forgetful," Aphrodite snorted as she entered the room. She walked around and eyed a few things before taking note of Apollo's seeing glass. It was focused on the eldest of this generation, Naruto.

Hmm...tall, strong and devilishly handsome, Aphrodite mused with a smirk, before frowning as she took note of his company, Hunters? Blech! How droll...Ah, but Zeus' dirty laundry is pining after him...I wonder...Nalia? no, no, Tharuto! ...No, maybe Naria? Ooh, I like that. Naria...Maybe that's the paring for him!

"Aphrodite?" Hermes' voice made the goddess jump and spin around. The travellers' god eyed her with a frown, "What are you doing in here?"

"Nothing! Nothing...just helping Apollo with a little deal we have going on..." the goddess of love lied, as she had been snooping before she left the temple, "Things to do and all that...so long, Hermes!"

"Uh-huh...right..." Hermes drawled in disbelief before he smirked, "Can't bullshit the bullshitter, Aphrodite. What are you thinking about in that love obsessed head of yours?"

AN: What is Aphrodite planning for our favorite blonde? And how will Fred and Naruto get along? Will there be another team from the Elemental Nations? And what's this? TOBI? Mask-less? The plot thickens...And for goodness sakes, what will I have for dinner tonight? Pizza? Steak? Chicken patties?

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