All Over Again…

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Chapter 10

Disclaimer: Victorious is not mine… I know, sad isn't it? Even the heavens cry for me.

With Nickelback in the background, Jade was found with a bucket and a rag in her hand staring at the shiny checkout counter. Satisfied with her work, she headed towards the bathroom in Riley's left wing. There, she disposed of the dirty water by gently tipping it in the sink, careful not to get any unexpected splashes on her clothes. A small smile broke out on her face as she began washing her hands, slightly tilting her head to meet her own green eyes staring back at her in the mirror. She caught herself smiling feeling like a fool. Why? Perhaps because she had a date tonight. Okay, so she had a date every night and the venue was a depressing hospital. But that didn't explain why she was feeling this sort of peace she hadn't felt in days. She closed the tap bringing the reason to the top of her mind. Tori was getting better every day, the signs were positive. Most likely she would be discharged tomorrow. And again the smile popped out. She looked up at her reflection. "Stop that!" She scolded herself trying to drag her scowl firmly into place. Failing at her attempts she resigned walking back into the front of the store. She reached for her schoolbag in the counter drawer. "Mrs. Riley, I'm heading out." Jade yelled as she shut the drawer.

"Oh Jade honey, just wait a second." She heard Mrs. Riley shout from beyond her office door.

"Kay." Jade replied, her hands tucked in the back pockets of her jeans, rocking on her heels. The Goth thought about the old woman who was feeling remarkably well these past weeks. Her illness lasted long but Mrs. Riley certainly was a fighter. Just another factor adding to Jade's peaceful mood.

The old woman smiled at her employee as she entered the front of the shop. Jade returned the smile. "Here, I just wanted to give you your paycheck for the week."

Jade took the small envelope that was handed to her. "Um, thanks."

Mrs. Riley smiled. "No thank you, you earned it. You are like my best employee."

"I'm your only employee." Jade said dryly.

Mrs. Riley tilted her head back and let out a deep laugh. Jade couldn't help but grin missing that laugh for a while. "I suppose you right, huh." The old woman said as she started checking the money at the till.

"I'm glad you feeling better."

"Oh, me too hon, I swear I feel like I'm twenty again." The old woman harboring a mischievous grin said as she stretched her arms into the air. Jade grinned at that, trying to imagine Mrs. Riley like fifty years younger. She probably hadn't changed much. "You know, one of these days I might even let Melvin convince me to give me a ride on his rocking chair."

Mrs. Riley raised her eyes and burst out in another round of laughter, seeing her favorite employee's jaw wide open, struck mortified. "Close your mouth, you'll catch flies that way."

Jade's jaw slammed shut. "Way too much information."

"Ah, well, you only young once, you know." The old woman winked. "That reminds me, what are your plans tonight?"

"I'm heading to the hospital." Jade shrugged.

"I figured as much. Here take this." Mrs. Riley handed her a magazine called Vocal weekly. "I know it gets mighty boring in there. That's her favourite, huh?"

Jade took the magazine that displayed all the latest music news and gossip. She should have thought of that. "Um, yeah it is."

She took out her wallet to see Mrs. Riley shaking her head. "Oh, no dear, it's on the house. You are just lucky I happen to know the owner." The old woman winked.

Jade smirked. "Extremely. Thank you."

"Ah, it's nothing. Well, send your girl my love."

"I will, later Mrs. Riley." Jade said as she headed for the door.

"Bye Jade."

Jade parked her car in the same spot in the hospital parking lot as she had for the last few nights. She jumped out making sure she had the bag full with entertainment material for Tori. With her other hand stuck in her pocket she headed through the automatic doors. The air was suddenly chill contrast to the surprisingly warm night outside. She squinted her eyes waiting for them to adjust to the harsh white lights. That's what she didn't like about hospital, there was too much white. She would be driven nuts if she had to stay here without a high morphine dose. Hmmm… they should think of adding some black here and there. It couldn't hurt.

She walked right passed the reception already knowing the path to the brunette's room by heart. She reached the end of the corridor and then raced up two flights of stairs. About to attempt the third she caught something in the corner of her eyes making her freeze. She stood there staring down the endless passage way. Her breathe coming out a bit heavy from the stairs. Her eyes settled on the woman who stepped out of a room, crumpling to the floor just outside the door, face buried in her frail hands. The sobs drilling in the Goth's head, her breath getting painfully caught in her chest. Then familiar bloodshot green eyes looked up at her, making her heart sink. "No…" She whispered to herself, the sting behind her eyes already evident. Not even registering, her feet were already in a dash brushing of the nurses and doctors in the way. Finally, she skidded to a stop in front of the woman, the bag dropped to the floor, her chest heaving. Her eyes searching through the door, relief washing over her when she spotted the heart rate monitor still active. But she still couldn't bring herself to study the patient's face. Turning her head to the floor, she watched the woman continue her emotional spell. She couldn't take it a dark cloud hanging over her head, wanting desperately to escape this passageway, this hospital, this world.

Next thing she knew is she was also sinking down to the floor besides the woman, pulling her knees to her chest. The woman picked her head up again, their eyes mirrored except for the red in the older woman's. "Jade?"

"Yeah?" Before Jade knew it she had an armful of the older woman sobbing and straining her shirt in a deathly grip. The body against her trembling violently, warm tears seeping through her shirt near her collar. She watched through stinging eyes unsure what to do. She found her arms wrapping around the petit body. "Shshsh…Don't cry mom. Please don't cry." Her own tears silently falling now, blurring her vision. The pain in her mother's sobs unbearable. No matter what she thought of the woman in her arms, she was still her mother. "Don't cry." She murmured against the blonde hair. "Please." They just held each other for a moment riding out the storm.

Eventually sobbing turned into sniffling, and then finally just hitching. Jade's arms went pliant, fell to her sides suddenly feeling very awkward. Her mother lifting her head to look into her eyes only to catch the resentment that was forgotten moments ago. A weak moment. Jade turned her head to the side, she couldn't allow herself to feel. Every time she got remotely close to her parents or shared a connection with them, they always pulled the rug from beneath her. She couldn't get hurt again. She won't allow herself to feel the pain of rejection. Her mother watched as Jade dragged herself up off the floor, dusting off her jeans and picking up the dropped bag. The older woman's gaze sadly dropped to the floor before she was startled by a hand laid out in front of her. She looked up at the Goth, then back to the hand, bafflement settled in. "C'mon, let's go get something to eat." The Goth said her tone, low and even. Her mother looked unsure before taking her hand and was pulled onto her feet.

They headed towards the cafeteria which was seemingly busy tonight but they managed to find a corner table. She left her mother there to join the queue. Jade's mind was reeling, for a moment she let herself feel. She would be cursing herself for it later, she knew. Why couldn't she just be the heartless person she pretended to be? Why! She squeezed her eyes tight, trying to erase the future disappointment and hurt.

"Sorry lady, are you ready to order?" She was startled by a voice in front of her.

"Um, yeah." Jade nodded at the cashier.

Jade returned to the table with a sandwich and two cups of coffee. She slid the grilled cheese towards her mother. "Here, eat."

Mrs. West did as she was told. Taking small bites out of her sandwich while the Goth was looking her over, sipping her own coffee. She looked frail and aged like ten years over the past ten days. Her mother usually took so much pride in her appearance. It was looking at a whole new person. Her mother spoke, her voice tiny. "Aren't you going to eat?"

Jade dropped her gaze to the table. "No, I had something before I came."

"Oh." Her mother said barely audible before she took another bite.

"I'm going to see Tori, now." Jade told her.

"Okay." The tiny voice said. Her mother not meeting her gaze, sadness setting in again.

Jade stood, turned to face the passage, about to head down it. But for some reason she felt stuck so she faced her mother again and sighed. "Wait for me. I'll drive you home."

Her mother looked up, the surprise evident in her expression. "Okay." She nodded and looked back at her food. "Jade?"

Jade shot her mother a look over her shoulder. "Yeah?"

"Can I come?" Mrs. West asked, her eyes still lowered.

Jade raised her brow. "Where?"

Her mother raised her head to meet the curious stare. "To see Tori." Jade's green eyes widened at the simple request.

Why? Jade wanted to ask but held her urge in. She wasn't sure why the sudden interest was. Maybe she was feeling guilty for what her husband had done. Maybe there were other reasons that the Goth was unaware of. Jade was definitely giving herself a headache with all the thinking so she decided to let it go. "I can't exactly deny you entry, can I?"

Taking that as a yes, it was meant to be, Mrs. West got up and quickly disposed of the empty containers on the table. She followed Jade closely around the turns and up the stairs. Getting to the second floor, they walked through the busy passage silently not a word passed between the two West women. Jade's head picked up as she heard familiar voices coming from ahead. There stood her friends, Cat, Robbie, Rex, Andre and Beck, hurdled around in a circle outside Vega's room, which was closed.

Mrs. West eyed the seating area. "I'll wait here for a bit." Jade gave her a brief nod as she went to join her friends.

Beck met her eyes first, he smiled. "Was wondering when you were gonna show up?"

"Yeah, why are we standing outside?" Jade asked looking at her watch. It was far from visiting hours being over.

"Oh, because the men in the white coats are checking her over." Cat said softly, an index finger tapping her temple, straining in thought. "I forget what their called." Everyone raising their eyebrow at the adorable redhead.

"Um, doctors?" Robbie replied with an exaggerated huff.

"No, that's not it." Cat shook her head. "Ooh I remember, a doctor!" Cat clapped her hands and giggled.

"Hey! I said that!" Robbie exclaimed while Rex just shook his head.

"You see that's why I say you two belong together." Rex mouthed.

"Why?" Robbie looked at his puppet, confused.

"Well, because you both need help, you might as well get the two for one discount." Rex let out a chuckle at Robbie's and Cat's frown.

Jade rolled her eyes, tired of the shenanigans of Robbie and his puppet so she turned to Beck and Andre. "How come the doctor's are checking her over?"

"Well, Mrs. V told me it was to administrate a new drug into her system to speed up the recovery of the incisions in her brain." Andre told the Goth.

"Yeah, so now we wait." Beck added with a shrug.

Jade leaned against the wall, her head dipped, eyes closed as she crossed her arms over her chest. She blocked out the sounds of the other teenagers conversing in hushed tones. Beck and Andre were busy discussing last night's basketball match while Cat and Robbie were having their usual unintelligible conversations. She couldn't help imagine how Tori would usually find herself in the middle of discussions, dominating or solving someone's problem. Which the Goth thoroughly enjoyed, watching Tori was an education. Especially if she was on a mission, Jade thought with a tiny smirk.

Her thoughts were interrupted by large sirens and the rush of nurses and doctors bursting into Tori's room. All speaking in jargon that she couldn't quite understand. Her heart started beating, almost out of her chest. What was happening? What was wrong? All the commotion was like a blur.

"What the hell is going on?" Jade yelled as she tried to pry her way into the room but she was restrained by a few male nurses. "Let go of me."

"You can't go in there miss." One of the doctors managed to seal the door. Jade's fists banged against them in defeat. She turned around to see one nurse remain at the reception.

"Well what the hell is happening?" Jade demanded to know from the scrawny nurse, Beck putting a hand on her shoulder.

"Yeah." Andre piped up behind them, Cat and Robbie flanking him.

"Well, Miss Vega didn't react well with the treatment."

"What the hell does that mean?" Jade growled slamming her hand on the clipboard on the counter..

"I…I don't know." The nurse stuttered. "I'm not a d-doctor."

"Then find me a goddamn doctor!" The Goth exasperated. The nurse nodded and stumbled back to go do just that.

"Jade, calm down." Beck squeezed her shoulders.

She whirled on him. "Don't tell me to calm down Beck!" She poked into his chest. "How the hell do you expect me to calm down when I don't know what the hell is happening in there." Her voice on the brink of breaking.

He gathered the straining Goth up in his arms. "I know, I know…" Finally she went pliant when he murmured against her hair. "It will be okay." He hoped.

Most of them were seated in the small waiting area near Tori's room for over the last hour. Robbie had driven Cat home, both wanting to be notified if there was any news. Mr. and Mrs. Vega had been contacted and arrived with Trina shortly after the commotion had begun. No one spoke, no one understood what was happening, they just waited in a morbid state. Jade picked up her head when she realized she heard her mother and Mrs. Vega deep in conversation. What were they talking about? What did they have to talk about?

She was brought out of her thoughts when someone stepped out of Tori's room. Everyone stood up at the same time, scrutinizing the doctor who wiped the sweat off his forehead with his sleeve. "Victoria Vega?" He announced in a nonchalant tone.

"Yes?" Mr. Vega drawled.

"She is going to be just fine, the worst is over." The doctor said. Relief swam through everyone and most of them relaxed their tense stances. "However, there was a complication?" Everyone tensed again.

"What sort of complication?" Mr. Vega asked concern dripping from his tone.

"Well as I said the worst is over on the sense of life threatening situations but there was a mental impact that had occurred."

"I don't understand." Mrs. Vega said.

"Well, during the administration of the new drug, Tori's body rejected it at first causing her to have respiratory complications which starved the brain of the oxygen it needed at that point. And when your brain is deprived-"

"Get to the damn point!" Jade fired. Everyone turning to her for a second startled by her outburst before their eyes were back on the doctor.

"She suffered some memory loss. It is still uncertain up to what extent her memory was severed in her current unconscious state." He stated everyone staring at him as if he was just speaking Chinese.

"You mean my baby might not remember me?" Mrs. Vega asked her voice small.

"Unfortunately that is a possibility Mrs. Vega, she might not remember most of you at first. But the more her brain heals the more chance of her remembering." The doctor said hoping a positive aura would travel through this bunch of loved ones.

"A chance?" Mr. Vega asked. "You mean that there's a possibility she won't get her memory back?"

The doctor stared at the floor. "Yes, that's a possibility."

"Well that sucks!" Andre mumbled. Everyone shot him a glare. "Well it does!" No one else was able to speak.

"But keep in mind she is alive and healthy." The doctor reinforced and then sighed. "Look there's also a good chance that in the long run, two to six months, she could remember nearly everything and everyone. It's just a matter of how her brain stimulates to the intake." He was glad when he saw a glimmer of hope in the faces in front of him. He turned to Tori's parents. "We should continue this conversation in my office but I feel it's best if her friends were also aware."

"No, its fine you can say whatever needs to be said right here." Tori's mom encouraged as she took her seat.

"Okay but there are risks or she might not be able to regain her memory fully. We can't overdo the stimulus. For the first two weeks I say she should be kept completely isolated from the outside world except from her immediate family. This is to help her get some sense of security and mental balance. After that she should be able to resume school and interact with other people moderately in her own way. Don't push her as that might have a negative impact." The doctor looked over all of the people gathered in the waiting room. "It is obvious that she is cared for deeply by every one of you, but it won't be easy, so she needs your patience."

Mr. Vega stood up and shook the doctor's hand. "Thanks doc, can we see her now."

"She's asleep but sure." The doctor smiled as he left the room.

The night started to chill down as Jade peered over the hospital rooftop taking in all the lights of night. She wrapped her arms around herself as she closed her eyes taking in the sounds allowing her mind to drift. She didn't know how she was feeling at the moment. But it didn't really matter, did it? Tori was alive, she would be fine. But would she be Tori? Jade sighed. She just didn't know what to expect after tonight. How did their lives tailspin so fast and hard? She understood clearly what the doctor had explained tonight. But understanding and accepting were two different things. Would she be able to accept that Tori wouldn't remember her, what they had? Have? Would she be able to handle it? Her heart was already aching. Two weeks would only tell…

"There you are." Jade was startled out of her reverie by a familiar voice.

"I needed some air." She said quietly but didn't turn back instead Beck walked to stand besides her also staring off the ledge.

"Yeah, me too." Beck took a deep breath and then nudged her playfully with his shoulders. "You okay?"

Jade let out a weak smile. "Yes, but it just feels like we stuck in some bad movie."

"Right… I always thought amnesia was like a myth."

"Me too." She sighed.

He looked at her through the corner of his eyes. "Are you going be able to handle that? Handle that she might not remember what you two have. Remember you?"

She turned to face him, it wasn't surprising that he always knew what she was thinking about. "She's alive Beck and gets to live her life, that's all that matters…"

"I know that but-"

She shook her head and interrupted him. "There's no but about it." He stared at his best friend with awe and so much admiration, he couldn't help but smile. "What?" She asked when she was feeling uncomfortable with the look he was giving her.

He shook his head but couldn't wipe the grin off his face. "Nothing."

"Clearly it's not nothing. Tell me?" She raised a brow.

"Okay, well I'm just proud of you, that's all…" He nudged her again with his shoulders.

She couldn't help but let out a small chuckle. "Why?"

"Well because when I first met you, you were the most selfish person I met. I mean like seriously down there selfish, only caring about yourself. Never ever giving another person a thought. Always being mean and-"

"I get it, Beck!" She cut him off wanting him to get to the point.

He grinned. "Right well, now you're the complete opposite and it's beautiful."

Jade never took well to compliments so she couldn't meet his eyes to his amusement. "Ah, well jeez… should I say thank you or throw you off the ledge?"

"I prefer the thank you." He smiled.

"Thank you, now let's get out of here before I change my mind." He chuckled as they strolled back into the hospital…

Two weeks later…

Jade pulled up to school in one swift turn, just beating the other guy to the last parking spot. Ha! She was late and she knew it. She never even had time to stop into Riley's before she got to school. Pulling the keys out of the ignition and grabbing her books from the front seat, she hopped down out of her car. Pushing the door shut with her black boots and pressing the car alarm with her teeth, she made her way through the parking lot. She maneuvered through the cars cursing herself for waking up late. They had come home extra late from the hospital last night. Jade would drive her mother to the hospital to spend time with her dad and while she did her homework in the car. The Goth still refused see her father who was still in a comatose state. Her mother and her argued about it often but their relationship altogether had mellowed down. They could stand each other for more than ten minutes at a time. Jade wouldn't say it was progress but more of tolerance. She especially didn't want to be late for this day as she assumed Tori would be at school today. She wasn't sure what to expect but she was definitely ready to see the half Latina again…

She was almost by the entrance when- Bam! All the items in her arms went sprawling. "Dammit, watch where you going!" Jade started scrambling her books together.

"I'm so sorry, let me help you." Jade's head shot up at the sound of culprit's voice. She met the most amazing brown eyes that had haunted her for the past few years. Tori smiled sheepishly, flipping her hair out of her face. "I'm sorry, I wasn't watching where I was going."

Jade lost her tongue, not sure what to make of the situation. But the pang in her stomach confirmed that indeed the brunette had no inkling of who she was. Jade watched as the curious eyes were set on her expecting a response. "Um, no it's okay." She almost stuttered.

They stared at each other for a moment before Tori smiled once more. "You might want to take these books back." Tori gestured to the books she was holding.

Jade snapped out of it, never quite feeling so foolish in her entire life. "Oh right." She grabbed the books out of the brunettes hand and Tori apologized once more before heading for the door. All Jade could do was watch. Watch as the past year seeped out of those beautiful brown eyes, her own heart burning in despair.

Then the brunette halted at the door and turned around to face the Goth once more. Their eyes held like they had a million times before, that emerald green meeting the chocolate brown. "Oh by the way, apparently my name is Tori Vega. And you are?"

Jade used all the will power in her body to swallow the waves of emotion that threatened to overflow. She spoke, her voice low, emotions hidden. "Jade, Jade West."

Okay, even I didn't see that coming…

Curious? Huh? Huh?

Tell me… ;)

You know what to do…

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