Chapter Nine

Arizona felt someone lean into her shoulder that night around the campfire. She had been busy watching Calliope, so she didn't notice her brother sit down next to her. She gave him a small, distracted smile before returning her gaze to the brunette laughing and talking with Cristina.

"Oh wow…" Timothy told her, "You're not even hiding it anymore."

"Oh shush." She snapped, pushing him back with her shoulder, giving a small laugh. She smiled at her brother, still in an excellent mood from her earlier talk and kiss with Calliope.

He studies her, and when she can't do anything but smile back, he gets suspicious. "What aren't you telling me?" He asks, a smirk on his face.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she says, turning away and biting her lip.

"Come on…I know something's up. You're happy." He told her.

"What? I can't be happy? I'm always happy. I'm a very happy person." She teases him.

"Yeah, I know…but this is different." He says. When she doesn't reply, he gives her a small nudge. "You know you can tell me, right? I love you no matter what." He tells her quietly, his voice completely serious.

"We kissed." She said quickly, unable to hold it in any longer.

"Yeah…you told me about that. She kissed you on the cheek, right?" he asked, slightly confused.

"No, Tim. I mean we kissed. Twice." She tells him, eyes wide and a smile on her face.

His jaw dropped and he stared at his sister for a minute. After a second of no response, Arizona began to doubt herself. Maybe Tim was more comfortable with the idea that she wanted to be with a woman…but actually doing so was pushing him too far. What if he doesn't like me anymore? Is it possible he'll hate me now?

"Aaron." Tim said, calmly and sternly, he could see the look his sister was getting, and understood that she had taken his silence poorly. "Look at me." He demanded. She wouldn't look at him. "Please?" Finally, she met his eyes. "I'm so happy for you…but I think you should probably let Calliope in on the secret, or it could turn bad very quickly." He told her, concerned about what the Latina would do if she found out she had kissed a woman.

Arizona's features immediately relaxed. He was just concerned for her well-being. I should've known better. She smiled widely, now excited to add in the missing details. "That's the thing Timothy…she knew I was a woman when she kissed me." She whispered quietly, but with all the excitement still in her voice.

Before she knew what was happening, she felt herself being pulled up and hugged by her brother. He whispered in her ear, "I'm so happy for you Arizona." He said, emotion filling his tone. He pulled back, still gripping her arms to look at her. "You're sure going to make your Uncle proud!" he said aloud, winking at her, trying to give some explanation to the group around the fire for his abrupt hug. He clapped her on the back and they sat back down on their shared log. Lowering his voice again, he asked her, "So why aren't you over there sitting with your girl?" he asks, a suggestive smile on his lips.

"She's not my girl." She said. Her smiled faltered a little, but never truly left. "She just wants to be friends…she doesn't like women and doesn't think it would be possible to have a real relationship. But I'm not quite ready to give up. I mean, I won't push her to do something she doesn't want to do…but I can be pretty charming, can't I?" she asks with a sly grin. Her brother nodded his head in agreement. "She kissed me. Twice. So that has to mean something, right?" she asked Tim.

"I certainly think so. I wouldn't give up hope quite yet, but like you said, this isn't something to push her about…Just give her time to think about it." He told her. She grinned at him, completely happy in this moment.

XXX

Callie couldn't stop glancing at the blonde haired woman across the fire pit. She had been casually watching her since she had sat down, and when her brother joined her, Callie couldn't help but wonder what they were talking about…especially when it ended with an enthusiastic hug.

"Callie! What the Hell is with you tonight?" Cristina said, startling Callie out of her thoughts. "You keep glancing at Lover Boy…did something happen when you took a walk, or what?" She said, fishing for information.

"Uhh…Why-why would you think something happened? Nothing happened," Callie stuttered. "We just took a walk. Talked a little. Nothing special, I mean...why do you think something happened?"

Cristina's eyes went wide at her friend's reaction and grinned wickedly. Something definitely happened. "Well, honestly I was just asking…but now I demand to know. You can't lie to me Callie; you're a horrible liar." She said, a mischievous smirk on her face.

"Fine…" Callie sighed. "I was going to tell you eventually, but we may have kissed. I mean, I kissed her. HIM! I kissed him!" She corrected herself in a panic. Shit! I didn't even last a few hours…Damn it! She closed her eyes to take a breather, and when she peeked her eyes open to see if Cristina heard her mistake, or believed her horrible cover up, she was very disappointed. Cristina sat there staring at her with wide eyes and jaw dropped on the ground. After a few seconds Cristina glanced at Arizona, staring, making connections in her head. And then she turned her shocked expression back to Callie, who looked petrified at what Cristina was going to say...or do.

Callie flinched when Cristina stood up abruptly and started to walk away. The brunette's shoulders sagging at the loss of her friend. "Callie!" Cristina says firmly, tugging on Callie's shoulder. The Asian woman had fetched a lit lantern, "You are coming with me. And you are going to explain Everything. Do you understand?" she asks, her voice very calm…but deadly serious. When Callie stood up, she nodded her head dejectedly, confirming that she understood. Cristina started to make her way towards the carriage and the seclusion that lied behind it. "We're going to take care of some personal business before bed, gentlemen," she shouted as explanation to their leaving.

As they passed Arizona and her brother, the blonde stood, looking at Callie, "Would you like me to accompany you? It's awfully dark out there….I wouldn't want you to get lost," she offered, smiling at Calliope. However, when Callie wouldn't meet her eyes and Cristina gave her a death glare, she got confused, and started to wonder what was wrong.

"We'll be alright," Cristina told her curtly. "Come on Cal," and with that, they were on their way.

Once they reached a point where they had privacy from all the men, Cristina turned to her brunette friend, "Tell me."

Taking a shaky breath, Callie starts her story, "Okay, so at President Lincoln's inauguration ball, I met a woman about my age there. Her name was Arizona. We didn't get to talk much, but she was funny, and wanted to talk about the war…unlike most women there. Then we didn't see each other for a few months, and honestly I forgot about her. But then, these men show up to escort us to Boston, and I thought Aaron and his cousin looked familiar, but I couldn't figure out why. I just shoved it to the back of my mind, thinking they just have familiar faces. Then…I'll admit it; I got sweet on Aaron. But when he got in that fist fight, and I was bandaging him up afterward, he said the exact same thing Arizona said months earlier and it dawned on me. He was Arizona." Callie stopped talking to look at Cristina. Her face was blank, but she nodded for Callie to continue. So she did. "And well, that's when I got really quiet and moody…because I liked Aaron…but Aaron was a woman. So I don't know…I figured I take your advice and kissed her. And that kind of made it more confusing, because I liked the kiss. A lot. I was hoping to not like it…because I can't like a woman… It's not- It's not…" she couldn't get herself to say it wasn't right though. Groaning in frustration, she went on, "Then Arizona got freaked out because she wanted me to know it was a woman she kissed…worried that I would hate her if I found out I kissed a woman. I told her I knew that already, and that I kind of figured that she really did like women… She confirmed it. I told her I just wanted to be friends though, and that I'd keep her secret. But then…I don't know. I just. I kissed her again." Callie was shaking. She actually felt nauseous as well, and had sent a quick prayer up to God that she wouldn't get sick. She was terrified of what Cristina's reaction would be to the information she had kissed a woman…twice. "I apologized; she said it was okay we could just be friends…and here we are," she finished with a slightly maniacal laugh that was born from her nerves.

Cristina sighed, "Callie…I'm not even going to pretend that I understand this…because I don't." she said, and Callie felt the tears start to fall down her cheeks. This was it…the end of her friendship with Cristina. "But Callie, you're my best friend…I'll love you no matter what, even if you happen to love a woman. I don't know that I'll ever get it…but I'll stand by you." And despite her usual 'no touching' rules, she took Callie into her arms. Once she heard the words and felt her friend's arms around her, she started to sob. All the emotions and feelings of the past twenty-four hours wore her down. She cried into Cristina's shoulder, so grateful that her friend doesn't hate her. And despite her inner confusion, she felt a huge relief that Cristina would be by her…A weight lifted from her shoulders she hadn't even realized was there.

"Thank you Cristina," she choked out.

"Yeah yeah…" Cristina commented, awkwardly patting her friends back. The hug was lasting a lot longer than she had anticipated. "Just be careful Cal…Don't do something you'll regret, and try not to get hurt." She said.

"You don't think I'd actually try to be with her…do you?" Callie asked, worried about Cristina's warning about regret. She didn't think she'd ever go through with it…did Cristina?

"I'm not saying 'don't be with her'" she replied easily, "I'm saying don't do something you'll regret. If you don't like her romantically, don't try anything. Don't do it if you'll regret it. But…if ten years from now, you think you'll regret not seeing where it goes, maybe you should consider it…" Cristina said quietly. "Just…think about it Callie. There's a reason you kissed her. Maybe it was because you have feelings for Aaron, but maybe it's because you like Arizona."

Callie was flabbergasted. She didn't want Cristina to say that. I just want the answer to be obvious…Why does this have to be so complicated? It would be so much easier if she told me it wasn't worth the risk…but Nooo…she has to be all reasonable and say shit like that. However, Callie wasn't going to say that to Cristina. Not after she just accepted her shocking news. Nope, she knew deep down that Cristina couldn't make this decision for her. But it would sure be a Hell of a lot easier.

"I know…" she whispered. "That's what I'm afraid of."

"Well, I sure don't envy you Torres," Cristina says giving the Latina a gentle shove on her shoulder to try to lighten the mood.

"Damn you…" Callie muttered, letting out a small bark of laughter. She looked around them quickly, taking in the darkness. "We should probably get back to camp before they come searching for us."

"Yeah, you're probably right. Aaron seemed rather hesitant to let you go outside the camp with me. She's awfully protective, I'll give her that." Cristina replied.

Callie rolled her eyes and turned around to go back to the fire before turning in for the night.

XXX

"Do you think I should go find her?" Arizona asked Tim for the fifth time in the past six minutes. "They've been gone a really long time and I think something was wrong. Calliope didn't look too good."

"They've only been gone fifteen minutes Aaron. You know how long it takes to do your personal business with all those clothes on…or have you forgotten?" he added in a whisper, teasing his sister. "I'm sure they're fine. Just wait a bit longer." He said, trying to relax the anxious blonde next to him.

Arizona just grunted in response. She stood up and poked a stick in the fire for a bit. I wonder what was wrong with Calliope. Arizona was really worried. Cristina looked different as well… She was sure something was going on, and she wanted to be there for Callie. What if she doesn't want you there? Arizona hated this turn in her thoughts, but it was a very valid point. Maybe Callie just didn't know how else to react earlier. She may have realized how crazy Arizona is and is trying to figure out how to avoid her. Well if that's the case, she's going to have to come out and tell me. Until then, I'm going to assume it's something else. Arizona thought with a nod. She pulled out her pocket watch again and looked at the time. She sighed. "That's it…I'm going to go look for them." She told her brother and started to make her way towards the carriage.

"Wait Aaron." Tim stated quickly, jumping up to grab her arm.

"No! I'm done waiting Timothy." She told him, her voice low, in case any of the men are listening.

"Aaron…" he said, warning clear in his tone.

"Tim-" she was cut off by laughter behind her. She quickly spun out of her brother's grasp and turned to see Callie and Cristina returning, smiles on their faces. She instantly felt relief at the sight of Callie. She's okay. That relief quickly turned to insecurity however, when they both walked past her, hardly even acknowledging her. "Callie?" she asked. Calliope stopped walking and turned to her. "Everything okay?" She asked softly.

Callie just smiled at her, "Yeah, I'm good. We're going to tuck in for the night though. I've been struggling to wake up in the mornings," she says with a small laugh. "Goodnight Aaron." She turns to follow Cristina towards their tent. "Night everyone!" she told the men still around the fire, earning a scattering of 'goodnights' and grunts in return. She then disappeared inside of her tent.

Arizona frowned at her back. What the hell was that? She wondered. She turned to her brother, who just looked gave her a sad look and shrugged his shoulders. She went to sit back down in front of the fire. She had noticed Alex had been glancing at her throughout the night, but he had been getting chummy with Jackson, so hasn't made his way over to her yet. She knew eventually he would pester her until she told him what was up, but tonight she wasn't up to it. Her happy mood had taken a sudden hit, and she was feeling rather down. Staring into the fire, she decide she would just go to bed now, that way she could be asleep by the time Alex and Tim joined her in the tent. Standing up, she stretched her back, hearing it crack a few times. She turned to Timothy and told him she was going to head in for the night, and gave Alex a nod goodbye.

Once in her tent, she took off her belt and pants, leaving her in her drawers. Obnoxious things that went stopped just under her knees, and provide no support...though she figures it would be a lot worse as a guy. She took off her first jacket and button up, leaving just a shirt and removed her bindings for the night. Since both Tim and Alex knew she was a woman, she took advantage of sharing a tent with them. She wasn't going to suffocate in those damn wraps anymore than she had to. She unraveled her rolled up blanket and laid it in her corner. Next, she grabbed her rolled up sheets and beat it a bit to make it less stiff. They didn't have pillows...one thing she sorely missed from home. They would use their extra blanket on warm nights, and sometimes she would use her wadded up clothes for cooler nights. Sighing, she crawled on top of her blanket and laid her head down. She was exhausted...more emotionally than anything else. It had been a crazy couple of days, and she's sure it's only going to get crazier from here.

Her thoughts, as usual, drifted towards Calliope. She so wanted to know what was wrong with her tonight. Hopefully a good night's rest will do her good as well and they can talk in the morning. However, she would have to be vigilant in keeping her eyes peeled for people. They were expecting to reach a town tomorrow evening or night, and they weren't sure what to expect. They knew throughout the day they would probably encounter more farmers and woodsmen the closer they get to the town, but because it's such a small town, there shouldn't be that many soldiers, if any. Hopefully the Southern soldiers would be closer to the Northern border. Needless to say, they were taking a few risks the next couple of days, and had to keep sharp.

Arizona startled slightly when she heard the tent flap rustle. Knowing it was one of her boys, she decided to feign sleep. She didn't really feel like conversing with either of them. Her backs to them, she listened as the undressed and set up their own beds for the night. Not five minutes later, she heard two distinctly different snores. She rolled her eyes. They were so lucky to fall asleep so effortlessly. She made a mental note to dip some cotton into wax, so she could have something to plug her ears... They came in handy throughout training to be a soldier, and even better when she started sharing a tent with those to idiots. However, she's forgotten to make them the past few nights, and has suffered the consequences.

Rolling on her back, she closes her eyes. "Goodnight Calliope," she whispers into the dark. After another ten minutes of listening to the crickets and snoring, Arizona finally lets sleep over take her, thoughts of talking to Callie floating through her head.

AN: Hey! I know it's been a while...I've just hit major writer's block on how to get the story where I want it to go. I have an outline planned to the end, but it's proving difficult to actually write the chapters without holes. But, I won't give up! Thank you for all of you still reading this, and I always love reading your reviews and every time I get a notification about a follower or favorite, I get giddy with excitement! Love you all!