The Edge of a Dream

by Kadi

Rated M

Disclaimer: This is not my sandbox. I only enjoy playing in it.

A/N: Dearest Guest Reviewers who have commented that you are "the nice ones" - you are all appreciated. My applause to you. Thank you very much for all your support.

For the guest reviewer who stated they didn't see this story on the main MC FFN page: it's probably your ratings filter. This one is an M. :) (I know, I was naughty. kate04 & narcissanerea made me do it, lol!)

I will probably be posting every other day for a little while. RL got super busy, and I don't want to run out of banked chapters before I get past that frenzy. Thank you all again, so, so much! :)

Chapter 10

The bed dipped beside him, but Andy didn't move until he felt lips touching his neck. He startled awake, and realized almost instantly that there was a woman straddling his back. "What?"

"Shhh." Sharon's hands slipped up his back. "You'll wake Emily," she said quietly. She kissed his neck again before she lowered herself onto the bed beside him. She lay on her side, facing him. "Hi."

"Hey." Andy moved onto his side and lifted his head. He propped it in his hand and studied her in the low lighting from the window. "What time is it?"

"A little after midnight. I took a late flight, and then our connection in Salt Lake got delayed because of a storm." She touched his cheek and smiled. "You shaved."

"Yeah." He shrugged. "I had to go to court on a case. I figured the cop shouldn't look like as much of a bum as the idiot on trial." Andy frowned at her. His mind was slowly clearing, and as the fog lifted, he realized that she was home early. He wasn't expecting her for another two days. "What are you doing here? I thought you weren't flying back until Wednesday afternoon?" Andy had booked the afternoon off so that he could pick her up, despite her insistence that she could catch a cab from the airport.

"I wasn't." Sharon rolled on to her back with a sigh. "I decided to take an earlier flight. My trip wasn't as relaxing as I hoped it would be." She stared at the ceiling above them while her hands rested against her stomach. "Being back in Chicago was wonderful, and I don't want to sound ungrateful, I love my family. I'm thankful for so much, but going back with the way that things are now…"

"It's different now," Andy said when she trailed off. "They look at you like you're damaged, or like they have to fix you." He had gone home, just for a weekend, after he got out of rehab. His mother had demanded it. She wanted to see with her own eyes that he was okay. It was the most uncomfortable trip of his life. "They want to help because they love you, but they don't understand that you have to do it yourself."

"Yes." Sharon's head rolled against the pillow. She looked up at him and a small smile played across her lips. "That's it exactly." She extended her arm toward him and stroked his chest with the backs of her fingers. "I knew that you would understand."

"Yeah." He gave a sad smile and a shrug. "Been there." Andy looked around the room. "Where's Emily?" He realized that she had mentioned the kid, but it was awfully late, and he didn't want her to have to move the baby again.

"I put her down in Charlie's room," she said. "I hope that's okay?"

Andy's head lifted in concern. "Think she'll do okay on the twin bed?"

"She's fine." Sharon laid a hand against his chest. She smiled at the way he worried. "She did okay with one in Chicago. I'm going to take her crib down this week and replace it. It's time. She isn't really a baby anymore."

"Yes she is," he grumbled. When she laughed at him, Andy huffed. "Shut up." He laid his head back on his pillow. "I see how it is. You run off, and when you come back, you laugh at me. I'm going back to sleep. Wake me when you're done."

"I'm sorry." She slipped an arm around his waist and pressed her body against the length of his. "Please forgive me."

Andy cracked a single eye open and looked at her. "I'll think about it." She wriggled against him and the corners of his mouth twitched toward a grin. He gathered her close and tucked her against his chest. "What happened in Chicago?" He asked quietly.

Sharon settled against him. She was still surprised at how easy it was to be with him, how comfortable she felt in his arms. Her lips touched his chest, and then she tipped her head back and kissed his chin before she tucked her arms between their bodies and sighed. He was so very warm, and she was tired, but he deserved to hear how her trip had gone. "My mom kept giving me tea, and my father…" She grew silent for a moment and considered her words carefully. She didn't want to give him the wrong idea. Her parents were very good people. "I love them so much. My mother saw my shoulder. I had to explain how it happened. I've never lied to them, but I think I probably should have this time. When I woke up the next morning, they had so many plans for how they were going to save me from my life. My dad spoke to a friend of his at the University of Chicago, all I would have to do is complete the application and he would walk my admission to the law school through. They knew I wouldn't want to live with them, so they found me a small house, with a yard where Emily could play. They offered to pay for everything, housing, childcare, and my education. I would just have to quit my job and move home."

That she had come home early, and was lying in his bed, told him what he needed to know. Sharon was incredibly independent. He couldn't imagine that it went over very well. That it came from her parents would have been even harder. They were, from birth, hardwired to do as they were instructed. It didn't matter how hard they fell, or how far, their parents just wanted to take care of them. Resisting was the truly difficult part. It would be easy to give in, to let their parents take care of them. The only way out of the dark, in his experience, was to do it himself. Andy reached out and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. His fingers traced the curve of her cheek. "That sounds like a pretty good deal. A lot of people wouldn't turn it down. What did you say?"

"I was tempted. So very, incredibly tempted. I kept thinking about what happened at the grocery store. I thought about Sergeant Anderson, and his wife. I couldn't get the look on his daughter's face out of my head." It was going to stay with her, just as he told her it would, and Sharon was trying very hard not to dwell on it, but there were a few truths that she just couldn't escape. "That could have been me, Andy. If I hadn't been driving, if I had been standing anywhere else, it might have been me that died that night. Emily would have been left alone. Yes, my parents would have come for her, and they adore her, but she wouldn't have had a single parent that loves her. Jack doesn't care, obviously." She looked up at him, bottom lip trembling. "And while I know that you care about her, you are not her father." She lifted her shoulders in a delicate shrug. "The job is dangerous, I've had to accept that before, I've come close before too, but not since having Emily."

"That's a pretty damned good reason to accept their offer," he pointed out. "I'd agree that Emily is worth at least thinking about it." When she looked down, he tipped her face back up. "And you know, if anything did happen to you, god forbid, I'd make sure she was taken care of. Even if that just meant making sure she made it to your folks. You do know that, right?"

Her hand curled around his wrist. Sharon smiled gently at him. "I know." He was incredibly fond of her little girl. "I have a feeling that you only want me for my daughter," she drawled, voice thick with emotion, despite her teasing.

"Probably." Andy rolled her onto her back and settled over her. His hands swept her hair back and he cradled her face in his hands. "You're pretty damn smart, hot too. So I don't have to tell you that I'm probably only half in love with you, but that little girl's already got my whole heart."

"She has that effect on people." Sharon ran her hands up his back. When he kissed her, she hummed. It was quick, and when he lifted his head, Sharon followed. She nipped at his bottom lip and lay back with a sigh. "I told them no. My mother cried. Dad was upset. Then he told me that he knows where Jack is. He's always known. He was waiting for me to ask for help. He knew he couldn't get involved until I asked. Jack is in Las Vegas. Card games and show girls are, apparently, more interesting than his wife and kid."

"Wait a minute." Andy sat up on his knees. "You're telling me that bastard took every dime that you had, and almost put you and Em on the street, so that he could go play cards in Vegas? Son of a bitch!" He stepped off the bed so that he could pace around the room.

"Andy." She hissed at the way he was stomping about, grumbling and cursing. "Calm down. You'll wake Emily, not to mention your neighbors. I can't imagine that the Clarkes appreciate you stomping all over their heads." She sat up in the bed and leaned back against his headboard.

"Don't tell me to calm down," He scowled at her. "That moron ran off with—"

"Yes." Sharon gave him a small, patient smile. "I know. I was there." She drew her knees up and wrapped her arms around them. "I appreciate that you are upset on my behalf, Andrew, but it's been handled. If you would like to sit down, I will tell you how."

He grumbled as he walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed. He turned so that he was facing her. "Okay, so how are you handling it?"

"Simple." She shrugged. "I'm getting divorced. My father is taking care of it," she explained. "There are some advantages to having a judge in the family." Sharon didn't mean to sound flippant about it, but it wasn't an easy decision to make. "We decided that he's done enough. No one in my family has ever divorced before, but my parents don't want him to be able to hurt us again, financially or otherwise. I think I've always known that it was going to have to happen, I just didn't know how to do it." She hadn't wanted to admit failure either. The idea of divorcing her husband was a complete contradiction of her very Catholic upbringing. That was something else that being home had reminded her of, just how long it had been since she had gone to mass or sat confession. Sharon hadn't been to church since Jack left. She felt ashamed, somehow, that she wasn't able to hold her marriage together. That shame was only compounded now by the fact that she was divorcing him.

"I forgot about that," Andy said of her dad. They didn't really talk about their families, except in passing, so he hadn't remembered until she mentioned it again that her dad was on the bench. "Shit." Andy scrubbed a hand over his face. "Well, that explains how he got you into law school with a snap of his fingers." When her brows rose, he held up both hands. "Not that I don't think you could have done it, or deserve to be there. I was just…" Her eyes narrowed and he scooted back a couple of inches. "I was shutting up."

"Hm." Sharon's gaze dropped. She studied the tops of her legs for a moment. She drew a breath and let it out slowly before continuing. "My parents didn't understand why I was turning down their very generous offer. I wasn't entirely sure either. At least, I wasn't at first. My life may not be convenient or simple, but it isn't bad. It doesn't need to be fixed or handled. I like my job. Maybe I'll go to law school some day. I don't know. I may choose to do something else entirely, or I could stay with the department. I honestly haven't been thinking that far ahead. I came home early because we couldn't agree on what was best for me, and I didn't want to be angry with them for loving me." Sharon's head inclined. She met his gaze again. "Since Jack left, I've been in survival mode, and honestly, nothing came of the plans that he and I made, so I stopped making plans. I need to correct that. I should be making plans, just not the kind that my parents had in mind."

"Maybe you should." Andy moved closer to her again. He drew her legs over his lap and slipped his hand along her calf to her knee. "What kind of plans were you thinkin' about?" His mouth twisted into a half grin. "You wouldn't bring it up unless you had something in mind. I can see those wheels turning in your head. I want to know."

She leaned forward. Sharon laid a hand against his back and let it stroke slowly downward. Her other hand covered his against her leg. "I wouldn't say that I'm planning anything, not exactly. I thought about you while I was gone, probably more than I should have. There are a lot of things that I don't know, Andy. What I do know is that I'm feeling things for you that I shouldn't, not while I'm still married. I've gotten attached to you, and so has Emily. We both missed you while I was gone." A bright smile lit her face. Sharon laughed. "She called every man that she saw with a beard Andy, and I had to explain to my parents why that was so amusing." She rolled her eyes at him, but the sound of his quiet laughter made it easier to keep going, to tell him everything that she had been thinking about while she was in Chicago, and during the long flight home. "I told them that we've been seeing each other, and it wasn't until I said the words out loud that I realized just how important you are to me, and how much I missed you."

"Yeah," he said quietly, voice low and rasping. "Me too." She was only gone for a few days, but it felt like a week. Part of him worried that she wouldn't come back, and he knew that if he were in her parents' shoes, he'd have made her the same offer. He would want to take care of her. Hell, he wanted to take care of her now, but she could take care of herself. "It was a long few days," he told her. "I think the guys at work were starting to get pretty sick of me. I haven't been all that easy to get along with."

"I forgot to pack Emily's monkey," she admitted. "I meant to take it with us. I think I probably left it on the sofa in my apartment." Sharon studied his hand, or what she could see of it in the dimly lit room. She toyed with his fingers. "She cried it for it while we were gone. Then she cried for you. I felt terrible for allowing her to get that close to you, and then I felt worse because I knew that I wanted you too." She looked up at him. Her eyes were bright, and just a little damp. "Andy, I think I could love you. I'm not saying that I do. Not yet, but if that happens, I want to be free to feel it. So when my father offered to help with the divorce, despite how awkward everything was between us after I turned down their offer, I agreed to let him."

"Come here." Andy crawled up to sit beside her. He leaned against the headboard and drew her over to sit between his legs. His arms wrapped around her. "I missed you too," he told her again. He turned his face into her hair and inhaled. "Shit, I could smell you everywhere. On my pillow, in my sheets. On my damned sofa. It was driving me crazy. I want you," he said, voice rumbling against her ear. "In my bed, in my life, making me crazy. I said that you matter, and I meant it. You don't want me to take care of you, and I get it. You had to take care of yourself, and it's good that you can, but I could do it. I could love you too, if you let me."

Sharon turned. She knelt on her knees in front of him. Her hands cupped his face and she drew him toward her. "I think I want that," she whispered. Emotion ached in her throat. This was a man that wanted her, and she was ready to stop running from him.

"Yeah?" His arms wrapped around her waist. He laid her back and covered her with his body. "Are you sure? Be sure, Sharon. When I said I wasn't going anywhere, I meant it, but if you wanna go all in, be damned sure. There's no taking that back."

With her skirt bunched up around her hips, she lifted a leg and curled it around his thigh. "I'm sure." At least, she believed she was. As long as she was still married, she was shielding herself from him; her marriage had provided a safety net, one that was now being removed. She could sleep with him, let him share her bed and have her body, but as long as Jack had been at the back of her mind, she had known that her body was all that she would give him. Sharon had realized, while she was in Chicago, what had changed for them before she left. Her heart had gotten involved for the first time. Before that, it was just sex, heat and lust, and the way her body felt when he was touching her. She wanted more than that, she needed more than that, and she deserved to have it. "I want you, Andy," she said thickly, "all of you."

His nose touched her cheek, nuzzled playfully as his lips eased hers with light touches. "Yeah?" When she nodded, he pushed a hand in to her hair. "You got me," he mumbled against her mouth.

"Good." She gasped, and then laughed, when he rolled and pulled her atop him. She straddled his hips and sat up. Her eyes glittered down at him as she worked open the top few buttons of her blouse. Then she pulled it over her head. When she leaned over him, her hair fell over her shoulder. She placed her hands against the mattress on each side of his head. She hummed when his hands slid up thighs and moved beneath her skirt. "I missed you," she repeated, voice low and husking quietly.

"Me too," he rumbled. He lifted his mouth toward hers, but she moved out of each. Andy's eyes narrowed. His hands cupped her bottom and he drew her up his body, until she was seated against him. "What do you want?"

Her lips curved into a slow, teasing smile. "Prove it."

He pulled her down and rolled them, so that he was covering her again. "Try not to wake the kid," he grumbled, and covered her laughing mouth with his.

They were a lot more playful than they had been in the past, but there was no less heat. If anything, they felt more consumed by it. They were freer, and more at ease with one another, now that intentions and feelings were out in the open. Laughter and lust came together as they redefined who they were as a couple.

Later, Sharon left his bed to slip into one of his t-shirts before going to check on Emily. She reminded him when she returned that the toddler was no longer as contained as she would be in her crib. They had both gotten used to wearing very little when they were in bed together, but that was something else that was going to have to change. Emily proved that point when she came searching for her mother, an hour before sunrise.

She had woken in a new place, in the dark, and all alone. It was Andy that leaned over her mother and pulled the little girl into the bed with them. He wasn't accustomed to sleeping in a t-shirt and boxers, but he was glad that Sharon had urged him to do it as he tucked Emily between them. "Hey monkey girl. What's all that noise about?"

It was his voice that she recognized in the dark. Emily laid her hands against his cheeks, and although she gasped at finding them bare, she laughed at being reunited with a familiar friend. "Andy."

"Shh," he crooned, "mom's sleeping." He knew that wasn't the case. He could tell, in the change in her breathing, that she had woken Sharon up too."

"Sleepin," Emily repeated. She snuggled in to him with a sigh and closed her eyes. "Emmy sleeping too."

Sharon rolled to face them. Part of her still wondered if she was making the right decision, but the only way she would know was to try. If the recent loss of her partner taught her anything, it was that a life was far too short, and a life placed on hold, was no life at all. Right or wrong she was moving forward, and she really hoped she wouldn't have to do it alone.

-TBC-