okay GUYS THIS CHAPTER IS LONGER AND ALSO THE SONG IS NOT ONE YOU GUYS HAVE EVER HEARD BEFORE BECAUSE IT IS MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD ANGIE VIGS AND SHE IS RECORDING IT THIS WEEK i WILL POST THE LINK WHEN IT IS DONE SO YOU GUYS CAN HEAR HER STUFF! HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE THIS NEW CHAPTER
KC POV
Why did there have to be an ELI and JENNA, I wish they never came to degrassi. Things are so screwed up between Clare and I. I am really getting worried she will leave me for Eli. I was trying to justify my thinking for asking her to choose between me and Eli. I would never tell anyone that I was scared to death that she wasn't going to pick me. I sat that night staring up at the stars.
I must have been staring a while because my mom came out.
"are you ready to talk now" she asked so nicely
"mom…..I messed up….big time" I said, my voice cracking
I told her about everything from Clare to jenna..to what I saw in the park.
"first of all your right you did screw up, but what's done is done and you can't change it. Ditching jenna was wrong KC. I raised you better then that. Also with Clare…..Honey I know you don't want to hear this but If she decides to go than you have to let her go." My mom finished saying sympathetically
"I know mom, I just can't let her go. I really love her. I don't think I could ever love anyone like I love her." I said as I felt my walls crumbling down
"of course you wont KC, She was your first love." I looked at her confused
"KC im a mom but the doesn't mean Im blind, I know Clare is the first girl you've ever loved because of how your acting right now"
"ok but…."
"KC, just because she was your first love DOESN'T mean there isn't another one out there for you to find. If she decides not to stay with you, then you need to accept it." She kissed me on the forehead and gave me a hug.
"Come on its late…..you have to get to bed okay" my mom left my room and I laid in bed thinking about what she said.
I knew she was right but it's a hard thing to accept, maybe I did need to move on. Is it really fair for me to hold Clare back? I know she loves me, I mean she wouldn't have given me another chance if she didn't. Is it really fair to ask for one though? I mean if I would have asked myself this yesterday I would have mentally kicked the shit outta myself for even thinking like that but now I'm not so sure.
Eli maybe weird but He really likes her, I see the way he looks at her because it's the way I SHOULD have been looking at her all this time.
I felt my heart break a little as I said this because the realization finally hit me
"Whether Clare can see it yet or not she is over me, shes just scared to let go"
I texted Clare before I passed out
"Clare we need to talk I'm sorry about my last message, can you meet me by the fence at 6"
"sure"
I fell asleep staring out my window wishing I knew what the right thing was to do.
Clare POV
I turned off my computer after I got the message from KC. I couldn't believe he wanted me to choose. Though I guess it had to happen sooner or later. I was still torn. I mean I really love KC despite his MANY MANY MANY faults but Eli is so good for me, I think I am falling in love with him too. I am so screwed up
My phone went off and I screamed when I read it
"Clare we need to talk I'm sorry about my last message, can you meet me by the fence at 6"
"ah how can he keep making me change my mind….I hated that he gave me the ultimatum then he took it back like he KNEW"
Ugh she needed a sign
I answered him and shut my phone off as well and turned on the radio a song came on by Angie VIg called CLICHÉ' and it was like she got her answer
He passed her a note in class And he thought she was pretty
And oh he wanted her number She knew, she knew it was cliché
Cliché, cliché, cliché
And if all the things he does for her
He saw in the movies
Though his romance is nothing new
She's falling, she's falling for his clichés
Solo
He brought her flowers and kissed her cheek
On the fourteenth of February
She knew, she knew it was cliché
But it made her smile
And if all the things he does for her
He saw in the movies
And though his romance is nothing new
She's falling, she's falling for his clichés
And if all the things he does for her
He saw in the movies
And though his romance is nothing new
She's falling, she's falling for his clichés
Solo
And no matter how many times it's been done before, before
Every move he makes she can't but help adore, adore
And if all the things he does for her
He saw in the movies
And though his romance is nothing new
She's falling, she's falling for his clichés
And if all the things he does for her
He saw in the movies
And though his romance is nothing new
She's falling, she's falling for his clichés
Yeah, yeah
This was her and KC's story to a T. Together we were very Cliché' and now I am starting to see that while it was great while it lasted I think it really is over.
Listening to that song made the realization that I am really over KC and his Cliché's. I have made up my mind. I will talk to KC in the morning and talk to Eli that afternoon!
I went to bed happy that night like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
The next day
I got to school and KC was standing at the fence like we agreed. I walked over to him ready to do what needed to be done but he cut me off
"Clare I think we need to break up" I was taken aback because I never thought that he would be ok with this
"I think so too KC" I said
"Clare we HAD something great but I think its far to screwed up now to fix, besides you're in love with another guy" he said with a sad smile on his face
I was in shock, was I really that obvious. He continued
"Clare you were my first love" he was crying now
"and I will always regret screwing up this relationship but you don't love me and its not fair to you for you to stay with me because your scared to love someone else"
"what….are you …talking about" I asked genuinely confused
"I had a LOT of time to think and talk to my mom last night, and Clare why are you even with me RIGHT NOW….I really didn't deserve another chance, AND there was a guy you really liked and YOU are crazy about….so why take ME of all people back…..ill tell you why, because I was safe to you Clare even though I am no good for you. You deserve better than me, and now I see it. Im going to make sure it happens by taking myself away as your boyfriend but I WILL ALWAYS be here if you need a friend" he finished still crying
I stood there dumbfounded. I had NO idea he was this tortured I felt bad but I knew he was right
"KC I will always love you but your right I have moved on, that was what I planned on telling you today. I went to the park with Eli the other night and after he poured his soul out to me FINALLY letting me in I KNEW deep down he was the only guys for me, even if I had refused to admit it out loud until right now. I want us to be friends KC." I said….he nodded in response. I rushed Closer to him and gave him a HUGE hug and a kiss on the cheek.
I whispered in his ear "thank you"
All of a sudden I heard a car door slam and I turned around and saw Eli's car quickly speed out of Derassi's parking lot
"CRAP" I thought this isn't good. I looked at KC who had that same look on his face. I must have looked worried cause he pulled me into another hug and said
"don't worry Clare talk to him after school and explain. Im sure Hell feel stupid for running off after he knows what happened". He gave me a hopeful smile. Just then He looked up and saw Jenna walking up to the school. I looked at him and he said
"hey I have to go, I have to fix ANOTHER huge mistake of mine" he said and ran towards Jenna.
KC POC
"Jenna Wait up" I called not sure if she would even acknowledge me
"what do you want KC" she said
"jenna Im sorry, I shouldn't have handled things the way I did" I started to apologize but she cut me off
"your right KC you didn't handle things right and just because Clare didn't want you doesn't mean I want you back in OUR lives" she said pointing to her stomach
I wanted to tell her off, tell her that Clare did take me back but we broke up. But I didn't I let her walk off.
I knew she wouldn't forgive me yet. I know that I Don't love jenna but she is the mother of my child and that means something. Even if we never get together (And we wont) we can at least be friends. I have to find a way to make things up to her AND my kid. I just don't know how yet.
Eli POV
I sped away from Degrassi as fast as I could tears brimming in my eyes but not DARING to fall
" I can't believe HER" I thought to myself. I just poured my heart out about Julia last night and the NEXT FUCKING DAY she is back in KC'S arms…she is just a GLUTTON for punishment. Watching Clare Kiss and hug KC was like getting repeatedly punched in the stomach. I knew now that Clare didn't want me and never would, she wants KC and always will no matter how big an ass he acts like or how badly he treats her.
I would never be good enough.
I decided to skip school today. I didn't want to hear Clare tell me in person that she didn't want to be with me. I went to my room and blasted dead hand, ignoring the 20 texts from Adam. I didn't feel like talking right now.
It was after 3 and I heard a knock at the door my mom called me
"Elijah you have a visitor" she sounded entirely to happy
I walked downstairs and said HER standing in the living room
"SHIT"
Clare's POV
I went in the school giving Jenna and KC some privacy, I hoped he was going to make things right and help with his son though I secretly hoped that they would never be together, I mean HEY im ONLY HUMAN.
I was still confused about the Eli thing this morning, just what exactly did he think he saw. I figured I would see him in English. Last period came and he never showed. I was worried and apparently so was Adam.
"where's Eli" he asked and I shrugged
After Class I tricked Adam into giving me Eli's address saying that I was going to drop off his homework but I had other plans in mind.
I arrived at Eli's surprisingly normal front door and knocked
A very chipper woman stepped out and said
"Hello dear can I help you"
" I am looking for Eli….is he home"
"AHAH yes please come in…come in honey" she said clearly getting excited.
She called Eli downstairs. I smiled when he came down and his face fell Immediately
"ELI…..can we talk outside please" I said cautiously
He didn't say a word and he made his way to the door
We got outside and once again he cut me off before I had a chance to say anything, why must all the guys I know cut me off.
"I can't believe you Clare! You have some nerve showing up here" he said
I was surprised at his tone
"ELI…."
"no Clare listen to me I opened up to you because I thought you could be the ONE person who would understand and not judge me for all my issues and that night I thought you proved it but then this morning you were back in the douche bag's arms….THE VERY NEXT FUCKING MORNING….so you know what Clare you can't decide I will for you…..
GO BE WITH KC….I DON'T CARE ANYMORE" he turned to walk away when I mumbled
"I can't be with KC" in such a small voice….I felt so bad for hurting him so much
"WHY THE HELL NOT Clare YOU TWO ARE SO IN LOOOOVVVEE I SAW YOU THIS MORNING" he snapped at me… now I was starting to get mad.
"Eli you …don't …know what you are talking about" I said starting to tear up
" I UNDERSTAND PERFECTLY THE GIRL I AM FALLING FOR FELL FOR SOMEONE ELSE. MAYBE I SHOULD KNOCK UP JENNA THEN MAYBE YOU'LL WANT ME THEN" he screamed and something in me snapped
"ELI YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT…..THE REAL! REASON I WAS HUGGING KC WAS BECAUSE WE JUST BROKE UP AND DECIDED TO STAY FRIENDS…" I screamed back. He started to interrupt but I cut him off, im tired of being interrupted
"AND ANOTHER THING THE REASON WE BROKE UP WAS BECAUSE I AM IN LOVE YOU, YOU UNBELIEVABLE, INSENSITIVE JERK" I finished tears streaming don't me face I stormed off leaving Eli to feel like the biggest ASS in the world.
I got home and realized that though it came out by accident in the heat of the moment, I had just admitted to Eli that I was in love with him.
I felt my phone go off. It was a text from ELI
"Clare can you please come back, we need to talk, not have a screaming match"
I ignored it because that Jenna comment still hurt, I mean how he could say that even in anger, I love him so much but he hurt me with that. It started to storm really badly and the thunder rattled the house so I was glad I wasn't going to be out in it
An hour later I heard the door bell. My mom was at work so I went to answer.
I opened the door and there stood ELI dripping wet
"OMG Eli" I pulled him inside
"What are you doing here"
"Clare you never answered me…so here I am"
"its dangerous out there you could have been hurt" I said
"Clare im already hurt" he said
"I am so sorry about what I said about Jenna I was just being stupid, I didn't mean it and I had NO idea that you were breaking up with KC." He was starting to babble.
"eli you really hurt me with that comment"
" I know Clare and you better believe that when you said you loved me I felt like the worst human on the face of the planet." He said looking at his feet
I said nothing. I finally opened my mouth to speak when once again he cut me off,
"Clare I love you too….more than you know" he leaned in and kissed me. The thunder roared and lightning crashed in the background but I couldn't hear it. My world if even for a tiny moment was perfect.
i HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED IT CAUSE I LOVED WRITING THIS CHAPER...DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW! LET ME KNOW HOW I AM DOING!
btw COME ON GUYS DID YOU REALLY THIN I WAS GONNA LET ELI LET CLARE GET AWAY
TSK TSK TSK
ANYWAY KEEP ON READING!