Note: I do not own or have rights to Twilight or its characters!!!

Kleenex Alert! For those of you who are sappy, like me, you'll need a couple towards the end of the chapter . . . nothing bad happens kids, it just gets sappy.

Also a note, you'll notice I'm updating this story more often than my other two at the moment . . . I'm sorry about that. I seem to be stuck in this one for some reason, 1810 Carlisle is very insistent that I tell this tale so please bear with us.

Meant to post this over the weekend but had issues with the site.

Chapter 10

Our Eden

The thick medical text lay open on in my lap, but I wasn't in the least bit interested in it at the moment. I was restless, worse the Little Deer during a blizzard, and I knew precisely why. As a predator, I was acutely aware of the slowly shifting cosmic tides the brought with them the change of seasons. The sun crept higher along the horizon as it roses and set each day and by night the positions of the constellations changed incrementally each time I went hunting.

The days were growing gradually longer and warmer and it was sunny more often than cloudy; my sister no longer needed her heavy winter cloak to go outside during the day. The snows were starting to melt too and the drifts, which had once come up half way of my thigh, were now just below my knees. At night it was still quite cold however and I would often encounter light snow showers during the dark hours.

By my best calculations, given the position of the sun and stars, it was now late February or early March. If the weather continued to improve at this rate, I estimated we would be able to begin our journey east sometime in late April. The ground would be muddy and there would likely still be some patches of snow at certain elevations, but with caution it could be done.

The sound of laughter filtered in through the cabin's open door and the light breeze that accompanied it brought Little Deer's pleasant scent to my nose. It was good to hear her laugh, and she seemed to do it more often these days. Her lessons were coming along well; I had begun teaching her elementary mathematics. She caught on to addition and subtraction easily enough, but multiplication and division was altogether a different matter.

A less pleasant aroma accosted my senses with the next stirring of the breeze, the strong musky smell of horse drifted in, mingled with my sister's scent. Cloud was a welcome addition to our little family. His presence made Little Deer happy and gave her a much needed distraction.

Under my careful supervision she tended him faithfully, applying her special poultice twice a day. The remedy consisted of whatever herbs she collected from the forest mixed with, of all things, honey. I had long known the golden nectar of the lowly bee was used widely in ancient times for the treatment of wound and that it was highly effective at retarding infection. I was very surprised, however, to see Little Deer using it.

She painted the sticky concoction on his wounds after thoroughly cleaning them and covered it with strips of cloth to keep the horse from licking the sweet medicine away. At my insistence, she also exercised him regularly in order to keep him from getting painfully stiff. He was resistant to this at first, but as with all things Little Deer managed to coax him into submission. She truly had a way with horses.

"Carlisle," the whisper of my name caused me to look up from my book. Little Deer was standing in the doorway looking very upset.

"What's the matter, did Cloud pull your washing off the line again?" I asked before turning my gaze back to my book. It wouldn't be the first time he'd done something mischievous. Cloud was a young horse, perhaps three or four, and he had a playful streak . . . not unlike his mistress. "I've told you before, child, he's not a dog. You should have left him in the paddock while you went about your work."

When she didn't budge from her place in the doorway I looked up again and took closer notice of her expression. Upset would be more accurate if I described the emotion etched on her face as anxious. My sister did not become anxious over mud on her clean laundry, angry perhaps, but not anxious. Only one of a small number of things would elicit this reaction in her; she wasn't feeling well, something was amiss with Cloud, or she was afraid of something. With a sigh I put down my book and got up.

"What is it?" I asked as I strode towards the door.

"Red Eyes," her frightened answer shocked me. I took a deep breath searching for any unwelcome scents, but I detected nothing. Undoubtedly the intruder was down wind.

"Hello, Carlisle." The sound of Iann's familiar brogue filled my ears. His call was as clear to me as if her were in the room, but Little Deer's human hearing wouldn't have detected it. I smiled, feeling a small measure of relief spread through me.

"You can relax child, Iann is a friend." I told her, hoping to soother her anxiety. "Still, I think I would rather go out and meet him than have him come here. Stay in the house until I return." I took up my coat and moved towards the door.

My sister still stood blocking my way. I glared at her with one eyebrow raised, hoping she would move as I didn't wish to be rude to her, but she continued to stand there

"Cloud is loose," she protested with a frown.

"Go and put him up . . . quickly, and then come back inside," I instructed her. It frustrated me sometimes that she seemed more concerned with the well being of her horse that with her own. "I'll wait for you."

*****

I raced across the meadow to the shelter of the tree line where I found Iann waiting for me. While I had exposed myself to the sunlight in Little Deer's presence innumerable times over the past few months, and I had become quite comfortable doing it, I now suddenly felt oddly exposed. If I should feel comfortable being myself in front of anyone, I though as I ran, should it not be one of my own kind?

When I finally stopped some ten paces from Iann he was wearing a warm welcoming grin. I found myself very glad to see him, and when he stepped towards me, with his hand extended to me in greeting, I eagerly accepted it.

"You look well." He observed as he released my hand from his grip. "And the girl seems recovered."

"Thank you and yes, Little Deer is much better now." I replied politely. "You too seem to have faired the winter nicely."

"Ahh, but it wasn't easy by any stretch." He shook his head as he answered. "I had to resort to your methods a few times." It was then that I noticed the golden flecks mingled with the vermillion of his eyes. "I don't see how you stand it, hind blood tastes like mud compared to the sweet essence of humans. Still, I suppose it's better than nothing."

"I wouldn't know, Iann, as I've never tasted human blood." I told him plainly. He gave me a disbelieving glare but didn't comment. It was several moments before he recovered.

When he did speak, he moved to a new topic. "Where did you managed to steal the horse form," He asked as he nodded towards the house.

"Iann O'Connor, I do not steal things . . . I appropriate them." I corrected in a tone of mock indignation.

Iann laughed. "Is that so, Dr. Cullen? Well, have you taken notice of my new frock coat," He gestured towards his new attire, "I recently appropriated it from the barracks of a British Army captain in Canada. Don't you think the red color bring out my eyes?"

I found myself chuckling as I shook my head. "Little Deer found the horse," I finally confessed. "Along with the body of his former master," I added sourly.

"Don't look at me," Iann took a slightly defensive tone. "As per our agreement, I haven't been hunting in this area and besides I always dispose of my remains properly."

His words were a sudden reminder that while our relationship might be cordial, he had not proven himself sufficiently worthy to be granted the full measure of my trust. My relaxed easy demeanor shifted to one of caution, I had Little Deer's safety to consider after all.

I dismissed his explanation with a wave. "The man was shot to death, not . . . attacked. Speaking of our agreement, what are you doing here; I thought you were going to avoid my territory?"

"Can't a man visit an old friend without rousing suspicions?" Iann joked.

I greeted his words with a skeptically raised eyebrow but said nothing.

"I have news," he finally answered, his expression and tone were both grave.

"Forgive my memory, but I thought news was to be left at the outcropping to the north?" I had insisted on this as I didn't wish to have one of my traditional brethren in close proximity to my very human sister.

"It's too urgent to be left scrawled on a scrap of paper and stuffed under a rock." He insisted.

"Fair enough, what is this most urgent news?" I inquired.

He took a deep breath before beginning, "Well, I was south of here three days ago and the hunting was scares, I tried to . . . Uhm . . . behave, but I couldn't manage to control my desires. I ended up at your friend's village."

My look of horror must have come across a bit more strongly than I intended as Iann stopped his narrative and took several steps backwards. I had asked him to avoid Little Deer's village because I didn't want harm to come to anyone she might care about.

"It's not like you think, I didn't hunt there and I eventually left the village to state my needs . . . on a young elk cow." His words eased my expression and he continued his story. "Anyhow, while I was lurking about, I heard men talking in English. I guessed that it was Savoy and his fellow associates, so I took time to listen.

"It seems they're planning a little hunt of their own, and your girl is the object of their obsession. The only undecided matters seem to be the manor of her death, how much she'll suffer, and how long they intend her dying to take."

My vision went suddenly crimson as fiery rage welled up like magma within me. I didn't remember launching myself at Iann, but when I was in control of my facilities again I had him by the throat and pinned against the nearest gnarled pine tree.

"Let me go Cullen," He begged hoarsely. For the first time I noticed he was truly afraid of me. "I'm just bringing you the message . . . please don't kill me."

I was embarrassed by my lapse of control and instantly let him go; it wasn't him I wanted to kill. My father's ghostly words filled my mind, "Let us hope he does not return to strike at your heels." I turned from Iann, walked a short distance away, and put my right fist completely through the trunk of a large sycamore.

"Remind me never to run afoul of you," I heard him mutter behind me. "When you're angry you make the Volturi look like butterflies."

"I'm sorry Iann, I'm not usually a violent man," I replied calmly as I examined the hand I'd just run through a tree. "I've no idea what came over me just now." I paused and then looked up at Iann, "Did they say when they might begin their hunt?"

"No firm date, but my guess is their waiting on the weather . . . same as you." He paused and then continued cautiously, "Weather of course wouldn't be a problem if you weren't traveling with a human."

And of course, he was right, but I had an advantage that Savoy did not. That is, if Iann was willing to help me after I nearly ripped his head off. "Might I impose on you again?"

There was a long moment of silence as Iann considered my request for further aid, and then he nodded. "Impose away."

*****

I made my way slowly back to the cabin. After my meeting with Iann I made a rare daytime hunt. The stress of my raw emotions left me thirstier than I cared to be in Little Deer's presence. A part of me knew that I would never hurt her, but after losing my control with Iann, I didn't wish to test my resolve further.

Upon opening the front door I found my sister pacing like a nervous cat. The look of worry etched on her innocent face was both painful and precious. A relieved smile automatically turned the corners of my mouth up as the warm richness of her personal scent filled my senses. Her mere presence was enough to relax away a measure of the tension I had been feeling. I continued to smile at her as I found myself suddenly feeling playful.

"Worried about me were you, my child?" I asked in a teasing tone. I wasn't prepared for her response.

She stopped in her tracks and turned to face me, her eyes were full of anxiety. I broadened my warm smile in an attempt to ease her distress, but it seemed of little use. I was about to tell her that I had news, hoping facts and information might make her less edgy when suddenly she exploded towards me.

She leapt at me like a panther pouncing on an antelope, throwing her arms wide to ensnare my middle. I was forced to take a step backwards as I caught her in my own arms. This was in order to soften the blow of her impact. For a human to throw themselves thusly at a vampire was rather like launching head first into a brick wall, had I stood my ground she would have injured herself.

She caught me about the waist and hugged me as fiercely as if I had been away for a fortnight instead of a few hours. The intensity of her affectionate display made my long dead heart melt like candle wax. I returned her affection, but with restraint, if I hugged her with a matching level of emotion I would likely crush her to death.

"Let me go now, Ayala." I insisted softly before planting a whisper of a kiss on the crown of her head. "Iann has given me much news, which you must hear."

Once I had her settled on the edge of her bed, I pulled up my stool, sat down, and proceeded to explain everything. The fact that Henry planned to hunt her down for the supposed murder of his brother didn't come as a surprise. We had discussed this eventuality all winter, but somehow hearing the truth of it exposed from a firsthand source upset my sister more that I had expected.

"We knew this was coming, Ayala," I soothed. "That is why I've spent the winter preparing you for the journey eastward with me."

I looked deeply into her eyes and saw mirrored in their jade depths the unspoken things that I too felt, things that I had felt for a long time, longer even that Little Deer had lived in this sad world. Things that I kept well hidden from myself lest they make my dead heart shatter like glass.

"I know child." I murmured as I reached to stroke her cheek. "I feel it too. You're not the only one who never wants to leave this place . . . our place, our sanctuary in the wilderness. I have come to love it here and, would that we could, I would remain here with you, lost in time and undisturbed until the universe ceased it tireless march. Unfortunately, that is not a reality which we have been afforded." I watched her tears come and wished desperately that I could join her. "We have no choice but to leave, to abandon this wild and magical daydream which we have been privilege to live for a brief while and face the world beyond.

"But remember, my dearest Ayala that while we may no longer live in this place, this place will forever live within use and so it shall never cease being our place . . . our private Eden."

I had moved many times in my unnatural long life. As a rule I never stayed in one place for more than four or five years, longer than that and people began to ask questions about my eternally youthful appearance. I always looked upon my nomadic life as an adventure, the chance to see new places and meet new people. Yet deep within me I yearned for something else, something that I knew I could never have. However, by virtue of a divine favor that I could not explain I had found that something . . . here in the wilderness with Little Deer . . . I had found a home as well as a family.

"Come now, it won't be so bad," I encouraged her gently. My forced happier tone was as much to improve my own somber mood as it was to cheer up Little Deer. "It's not as though you'll be alone, child. No one is tossing you out into the cold cruel world to fend for yourself; Cloud and I are coming too." I moved to sit beside her on the bed and wrapped my arm around her shoulders. "We'll make ourselves a new home and it shall be just as good as this one, you'll see."

AN: I had a hard time writing the end of this chapter, I was actually in tears writing Carlisle's little speech and I had to stop and get a grip.

While I had a firm grasp on how both Little Deer and Carlisle felt about the prospect leaving, I couldn't quiet find the right words. Then I stumbled across the song 'Maybe' by Thom Pace. I'm going to show my age now, this was the theme song for The Life and Times of Grizzly Adams, one of my favorite childhood TV shows (we're talking late 1970's here folks . . . yes kids, Blue's as old as dirt!).

Anyway, moving on . . . it expresses, more eloquently than I ever could, the sentiments of these two remarkable characters; Carlisle and Little Deer's longings to remain in paradise, their sense of loosing something very special, and the tragedy of having to leave their little slice of Eden. It also express, especially for Carlisle, the hope for one day finding a true and lasting home.

If you go searching for it on You Tube, make sure you find the whole song. It's a beautiful ballad and reminds me a lot of John Denver's 'Take Me Home Country Road'.