A/N: I'm very sorry it took so long this time. I had a bad week and only managed to write at all the last two days. I guess that's also the reason why this chapter turned out much more emotional than I originally intended. It somehow developed a life of it's own. If you think Jane or Lisbon behaved out of character, please tell me. The chapter is also very short, sorry again, but I thought to give you something, even if not much, is better than have you wait even longer. Again, there wasn't much progress when it comes to the case, but don't worry, that's going to change soon.

Thank you so much for reading and commenting this story. It means a lot to me, at the moment even more so.

Going round in circles

Lisbon let herself fall in the seat beside Jane. They plane was only half full and Lisbon initially had been in the row in front of him, trying to read. He looked up at her with raised eyebrows.

"I thought you wanted a quiet place to read?" he closed the folder on his lap.

Lisbon shrugged.

"It's pointless going through the files for the 100th time", she said.

"Well..."Jane began slowly, "I told you that ten minutes ago, but you insisted..."

"Am I not allowed to change my mind?" She was already getting slightly annoyed again. He lifted his hands in self-defence.

"I'm just surprised, that's all." A short pause. "Is everything alright?"

Lisbon sighed and closed her eyes for a moment. She was doing it again. Snapping at him for no reason at all.

"I'm sorry", she murmured, "I just couldn't concentrate." She looked at him. "I can go again, if you'd like to read?"

"No", he immediately answered and took her files out of her hands to throw them together with the one on his lap on the empty seat between him and the window.

"You're having a headache again", he remarked a moment later, a worried expression on his face.

"No", Lisbon lied. He just continued to look at her and she wavered under his glance.

"Ok, maybe", she admitted, crossing her arms in front of her chest. Perhaps she should have stayed in her own row. She didn't really know why she'd come back in the first place. Because she hadn't wanted to be alone, a slight voice at the back of her head reminded her.

"You're too tense all the time", Jane explained. "You have to relax your shoulders, Lisbon. No wonder your head is hurting."

"What do you expect after close to three hours on crappy airplane seats?"

She hated flying. The first two hours she'd been able to cope, but ever since they changed plane in Phoenix she had enough.

Jane just shook his head. "Well, I don't have a stiff neck."

"That's just because you're so used to sleeping on uncomfortable couches."

She saw the hint of a grin on his face.

"So now it's the fault of my couch?"

"Just forget it", she said, wishing again that she'd stayed one row in front of him. She didn't really mean it, though. It was strangely familiar and comforting to banter with Jane about something silly as this.

"I could help you, if you'd let me", he said that moment and she shook her head before he could finish his sentence.

"I'm not letting you hypnotise me!"

He was clearly grinning now. "Well, that actually wasn't what I wanted to suggest, but it would work too, I'm sure of it."

She just glared at him.

"No, I wanted to offer you a neck massage."

"I'm fine", she hastily said. "I don't need anything, Jane." The idea of his hands on her shoulders and neck made her shiver and she could feel the heat in her cheeks. She looked away, hoping fervently that he wouldn't notice it.

She took a deep breath, deciding that it was time to move their conversation to into a safer area, even if this meant talking about more serious topics.

"We should discuss what we're doing as soon as we're there."

"I'd say we rent a car and look for a motel...preferentially with a bed to sleep in and not just a couch."

She didn't have to turn around to know that he was still grinning at her.

"I'm serious", she said, facing him. "We have to decide what our next steps are."

Jane sighed. "I'm serious too, Lisbon. It's gonna be close to ten until we're in the city, maybe even later depending on the traffic around the airport. We're not going to do anything this evening."

She crossed her arms in front of her chest. "I didn't say anything about today. I'd just like to plan the next days."

She waited for him to object, but he didn't.

"I talked to Cho while you were getting some tea in Phoenix. I had him check on Volker and it seems he's allowed to receive visitors. It might be easier if we just go there and pretend we're old friends paying a visit, instead of trying to do it over the FBI."

She was glad to see that Jane seemed very focused suddenly.

"You want to talk to him first thing tomorrow, before we had a look at the files?"

Lisbon nodded. "We need to know what we're dealing with. Besides, if it really is Volker behind all of this, I very much doubt it that the files still will be there."

Jane remained silent for a moment, obviously pondering about something.

"Did Cho say anything else?" he asked her.

"No", her answer came a bit to fast.

She cleared her throat. "There are a few other things we should talk about before we land."

Jane raised an eyebrow at her, clearly seeing through her ploy to distract him from his question.

"I want to make a few things very clear", she began.

"Please, Lisbon", Jane rolled his eyes at her and she felt a surge of anger rush through her.

"You might be able to intimidate Wylie, but..."

"No, you're going to listen now, Jane." He opened his mouth to object but something in her eyes must have made him change his mind.

"I'm in charge, here. This is about me, Jane, which means I'm going to take the decisions. I don't want you running off on your own doing something stupid."

"I already promised you that this afternoon", he interjected, sounding a tad offended.

"You tell me about your plans beforehand, not after we're already in the middle of one of your schemes. And If anything goes wrong, anything at all, I'm gonna take the blame, I and nobody else, are we clear?"

"How often are you gonna mention that?" he asked, now clearly annoyed.

"I got it. Don't do anything, Jane. Don't let anyone see you with me, or near the former CBI, or Volker. Would you like me to hide in a motel room for the next days?"

Lisbon just stared at him, mouth slightly open. Jane never lost his temper. The only times he'd talked to her like this had been while still hunting Red John. For a moment she didn't know what to say.

"I didn't come with you to sit back and do nothing, Lisbon. I told you so earlier and I'm going to repeat it as often as needed until you finally get it. I want to help you. I'm worried and I don't give a damn about my future."

He spoke louder and Lisbon for once was immensely relived that hardly anyone was on the plane with them.

"Do you honestly think I'd continue working for the FBI if they fire you? I don't care about my job, I never have."

"But...", Lisbon began tentatively, Jane however didn't let her finish.

"You know what", he said abruptly, "I think I changed my mind. I'd like to read for a while. If you wouldn't mind." He took one of the folders and opened it, demonstratively no longer looking at her.

"At least one of us should try to save your neck, and you're obviously to worried about keeping everyone else safe than to care about your own damn future."

Lisbon felt as if someone had punched her. Her mind was completely blank and she just stared at him awe-struck. It wasn't like her to not respond, but she just couldn't think of anything to say. Instead she decided to flee, which anyway seemed to be what he wanted her to do, at least if the way he was ignoring her was anything to go by.

She didn't take a folder with her, and only partly because this would have required her to lean over him to get it. She was pretty sure she wouldn't be able to concentrate on it anyhow. Jane didn't get angry, not like this, not towards her.

One row of seats between them was not nearly enough for her taste. She found a row in the front part of the plane, with only one elderly woman sitting at the window.

"Is this seat free", she asked, embarrassed at how shaken her voice sounded.

"Of course", the woman smiled at her. Lisbon recognized a pitiful smile when she saw it… it seemed the whole plane had heard their discussion.

Lisbon sat down on the aisle seat and closed her eyes. What the hell had just happened?

"Are you alright, dear?"

She turned around. She knew the woman just wanted to help, but she was making an already embarrassing situation even worse.

"I'm fine", she murmured and managed something like a smile, not very convincingly though, based on the woman's next words.

"It will be fine. Even the best couples fight from time to time. My former husband I had our moments too." She laughed and Lisbon realized with something close to shock that her seat neighbour though she and Jane were together.

She opened her mouth to object, but decided against it the last moment. She was tired of talking and in the end it didn't matter what other people thought.

She forced another smile and closed her eyes, in the hope that this would stop any further questions, or comments.

Lisbon only wanted to pretend being asleep, but despite the chaos in her mind and the noise in the airplane she felt herself doze off after a while. She barely registered as suddenly something soft was placed around her. She slowly opened her eyes, blinking a few times before her vision cleared. Someone had put a blanket over her. She sat up, holding on to the soft fleece. As she turned her head she just saw Jane sitting back down in his seat.

"See", the elder woman said that moment, with an "I told you so" expression on her face. "It will be fine."

Lisbon ignored her. She played with the thought to get up and walk back to Jane but that moment the seatbelt sign above her head turned on and a voice over the loudspeaker announced that they started their descend towards Sacramento. She sighed and leaned back in her seat.

Lisbon sat on her bed, looking at the watch on the bedside table. It was after midnight, but there was no chance she would be able to sleep now. With a sigh she stood up and walked to the door. She needed some air. She stepped outside and propped her arms on the railing.

The only noise was coming from a road nearby, the motel itself seemed very quiet. Lisbon looked at the sky, brightly illuminated by the lights of the city, she could hardly see any stars.

Jane hadn't said much since they left the plane. She'd hated the silence in the car but whenever she started gathering the courage to say something, she'd looked at him and backed down again. He'd been the one to finish their discussion, so it should be him to start it again. At least that's what she kept telling herself.

She flinched as she heard a door opening. She didn't have to turn around to know that it was Jane. She hold her breath for a moment, awaiting what he would do. Was he looking for her, or had he simply wanted a bit of fresh air himself?

Her heart beat painfully hard in her chest as she heard him approach her and finally felt his elbow brush against hers, as he leaned on the balustrade beside her.

"Couldn't you sleep?"

She shook her head, still not looking at him.

"No."

"Well, that happens if you sleep the whole morning and part of the plane ride."

She could hear the smile in his voice and turned around, surprised. His expression turned serious the moment their eyes met.

"I'm sorry, Lisbon", he said softly. "I didn't mean to shout at you, it's just…" He sighed, looking out into the night.

"You can be pretty exhausting sometimes."

She laughed. "That's something people say about you, Jane. Not me."

He faced her again. "Well, recently you sometimes act like I used to. Maybe I was a bad influence."

She shook her head, a sad smile on her lips.

"You know that's not true."

He shrugged and she still could feel his eyes on her.

"I'm sorry, too", she finally said. "I know you want to help and…" She took a deep breath and started again. "I know I have difficulties accepting help. It's just so much easier to risk something for someone else, than to have them risk something for me in return."

He smiled. "Well, that's because you're a control freak, and the most selfless person I've ever met."

"I'm not." He just let her answer stay like that, but he didn't need to say anything. She knew herself that there was a certain truth to his statement, at least to the first part.

"You better start getting used to it", Jane said calmly. "I have no intentions of letting you scare me away. I'm gonna help you, whether you like it or not."

He waited until she looked at him. "Do both of us a favour and stop trying to push me away, okay?"

Lisbon turned her face away; she felt a sudden lump in her throat.

"Okay", she whispered. For a moment no one said a word.

"I do care", Lisbon suddenly said even if she'd hardly managed to get the words out. She needed him to know, even if it almost physically hurt her to admit it. She couldn't explain why this was so difficult for her.

She clenched her hands to fists, to prevent them from shaking.

"I do care about my future." She spoke very softly now, her next words hardly more than a whisper.

"I'm scared, Jane."

The cars down on the parking lot got blurry, as tears welled up in her eyes. She turned away from him, so that he wouldn't see them. She was almost panting for breath now; it felt as if everything was closing in around her.

"Hey", Jane said softly and she felt his hand on her back. His touch was almost too much and it took her all the effort not to burst into tears.

"It's going to be fine, Teresa", he said, drawing soothing circles on her back with his hand.

She just nodded, not trusting her voice that moment.

"I promise", he said, repeating his words from over a week ago, when she for the first time mentioned the possibility of getting suspended.

She closed her eyes, fighting back the tears. Part of her wanted to walk away, lock herself into her room so that he couldn't see her like this. Another part of her wanted nothing more than for him to hold her. In the end she just stayed were she was, concentrating on her breathing and his hand on her back. Slowly she felt herself calm down. Jane didn't walk away, but he also didn't attempt to come closer, probably afraid that he might chase her away at any moment.

The calmer she was, the more embarrassed she felt. He still hadn't pulled back his hand.

Lisbon cleared her throat, trying to sound casually.

"We probably should try to get some sleep."

His hand moved to her shoulder and stayed there.

"That's probably a good idea", he said, then adding slowly. "But we also could stay here a while longer. We don't have to talk if you don't want to, we can just stand here and watch the sky."

There was so much concern and affection is his voice, it was almost enough to have her tear up again. And he was right. She didn't want to go, she didn't want to be alone right now. So they stayed. Neither of them spoke a word; they just stared into the night. Jane was standing so close now, that their shoulders were touching and he took her hand, intertwining his fingers with hers.