Author's Note: Sorry for the long wait. I had to start school back again…and I still hate science. One other reason it's been so long is my Word program keeps messing up. I need to get an upgrade. Ugh… By the way, thanks to the anonymous user delavega for the inspiration for this chapter. I'll probably be using a lot of the suggestions. Anyway, the FFX disk I got is too scratched up to play so ;(. Have fun!
Disclaimer: Still don't own it…
Babysitting?
By Aurora M. Tepes
Chapter 10: HOSPITALS!
"He's still not awake," Loz informed for about the hundredth time that night. Sephiroth shook with anger as he iced the cake.
"IS HE DEAD DADDY!" Kadaj screamed. Sephiroth bit his lip and washed his hands, walking over to where Loz and Kadaj were standing over Yazoo afterward.
"I already told you. He's not dead, he's just sleeping. He ate too much sugar and that's what happens. Let this be a lesson to both of you," Sephiroth said.
"BUT IT'S BEEN ELEVENDY-TWO HOURS!" Kadaj argued.
"Yeah, and he's never slept for- Kadaj! There's no such thing as 'elevendy-two.' What are you? Five?" Loz teased, laughing shortly after.
"Loz, Kadaj is five," Sephiroth deadpanned.
"YEAH, LOZ, YOU BIG STUPID-HEAD!" Kadaj screamed. Loz scowled at Kadaj.
"Boys, no fighting, especially when your brother's comatose," Sephiroth chided. They stopped.
…
……
………
……
…
"Wait…YAZOO'S COMATOSE!" Sephiroth exclaimed. "OHMYGOSH I'VE GOT TO GET HIM TO A HOSPITAL! TO THE HOSPITAL!" Sephiroth ran to the open window and jumped out, as if to fly. He held up a sign that read 'Yipes' and fell to his impending doom. Seconds later he was back in the room. "Okay, let's try this again. TO THE HOSPITAL!" He grabbed all three kids and dashed down the stairs, got in the car, and drove 9,999,999,999,999.456 miles per hour over the 55 mph speed limit.
Kadaj screamed joyously.
Loz cried.
Yazoo's head lulled to the side.
Sephiroth thought about his beloved Hello Kitty collection.
They reached the hospital.
"WHAT'S A HOSPITAL!" Kadaj asked as they pulled up.
"It's a place where sick people go to get well. Kinda like a doctor's office only for more serious things," Sephiroth explained as he un-seat-belted Yazoo and picked him up.
They walked in and were greeted by the receptionist.
"Oh, hey Seph. And who are these cute widdle guys?" she greeted, quickly switching to her baby voice when she saw Loz, Kadaj, and Yazoo.
"Oh, hey…(what was her name again? Oh yeah)…Brandy. Yeah. They're…uh…um…my…well, let's see, how to explain this…they're my…sons?" Sephiroth said quickly, then closed his eyes and waited for the impending…
"YOU HAVE KIDS!"
WHAP!
Sephiroth lifted his hand to his now red, stinging cheek.
"Well…yeah… Anyway, this one's comatose and needs some kind of care. Not quite sure what yet."
"YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE SINGLE!"
WHAP!
"I AM!"
WHAP!
"I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR LIES, SEPHY-KUN! WE'RE DONE!"
"Did we ever have a relationship to begin with?"
WHAP!
"DADDY! WHY IS THE MEAN LADY SLAPPING YOU?" Kadaj asked as innocently as is possibly for Kadaj to ask.
"MEAN LADY! HOW DARE YOU CALL ME A- I mean, Hello, what's your name little guy?" the receptionist said, smiling in her sick-sweet way. Kadaj screamed and whacked her with his toy sword.
"THE MEAN LADY'S TRYING TO TURN ME TO A PUMPKIN!" he screamed, still whacking the receptionist. Loz was confused and Sephiroth had fallen to the floor in laughter. Yazoo still lay comatose.
"Vat's all theeeze rukas?" Dr. Jaques Von Schtorkenheimer, the famous French-German physician who traveled the world in search of never-ending molasses but turned back on find that he liked chocolate much better and was cursed by the Wicked Witch of the Diagonals and became a high-school girl's finger, then broke the curse and was turned into a giant frog, demanded as he hopped into the room. Yazoo's eyes shot open. He sat up and pulled out his toy-turned-real gun. He shot a suction-cup dart thingy at Dr. Jaques Von Schtorkenheimer, the famous French-German physician who traveled the world in search of never-ending molasses but turned back on find that he liked chocolate much better and was cursed by the Wicked Witch of the Diagonals and became a high-school girl's finger, then broke the curse and was turned into a giant frog. "AHH! THEEZE SUCTION CUP! EET 'URT MA FACE! ribbit"
"Yazoo! You're awake!" Loz rejoiced.
"KILL THE GIANT FROGGY!" Kadaj screamed, jumping at Dr. Jaques Von Schtorkenheimer, the famous French-German physician who traveled the world in search of never-ending molasses but turned back on find that he liked chocolate much better and was cursed by the Wicked Witch of the Diagonals and became a high-school girl's finger, then broke the curse and was turned into a giant frog. Sephiroth grabbed him from the air.
"Uh, that's not necessary, Kadaj. And since Yazoo's all better, we'll be going now. Sorry for all the trouble we've caused you, Dr. Jaques Von Schtorkenheimer, the famous French-German physician who traveled the world in search of never-ending molasses but turned back on find that he liked chocolate much better and was cursed by the Wicked Witch of the Diagonals and became a high-school girl's finger, then broke the curse and was turned into a giant frog," Sephiroth said quickly, grabbing the three boys and dashing back out to his car.
"COME BACK 'ERE!" the doctor shouted running after the car. "SEPHIROSS! YOU VILL PAY FOR THEEZE!" A plan formed in Dr. Jaques Von Schtorkenheimer, the famous French-German physician who traveled the world in search of never-ending molasses but turned back on find that he liked chocolate much better and was cursed by the Wicked Witch of the Diagonals and became a high-school girl's finger, then broke the curse and was turned into a giant frog,'s mind. He would become an evil villain…AND TAKE OVER THE WORLD. And then, then he would take Sephiroth's role as main bad-guy in the Final Fantasy VII. Dr. Jaques Von Schtorkenheimer, the famous French-German physician who traveled the world in search of never-ending molasses but turned back on find that he liked chocolate much better and was cursed by the Wicked Witch of the Diagonals and became a high-school girl's finger, then broke the curse and was turned into a giant frog, laughed maniacally and Brandy the receptionist groaned in pain.
---
Author's note: Okay, I'm going to try to update this fic and my HP x-over one every weekend. No promises though.