RECAP:

..."I need a shower," she blurted out, and jumped up. He nodded and she escaped down the hall, remelting bit to drip chocolate on the floors. What the fuck is wrong with me I don't like him like that, do I? Sure he's a flirt...but he surely doesn't see me like that. Especially if he was so upset about Elizabeta. Then again...anyone would be upset about something like that. No! Friends...just friends...that live together and pretend to be a couple. Totally normal

.

Ah, fuck...

CHAPTER TEN

Lovina bolted upstairs, auburn curl bouncing vivaciously as she went. She slipped into Gilbert's room to grab some clothes to change into and spotted her phone on the dresser. She was going to leave it, but grabbed it anyway, maybe I'll play Tetris while I wait for my hair to dry. Tetris calms nerves, right? Those motherfucking block won't see what's coming. I'll fucking own those shapes. Yeah, that way I don't have to think about how I awkwardly just ran away from him. She cringed, still hyperventilating a little bit. She took a few deep breaths to calm down, slipped out of the room and darted down the hallway into the upstairs bathroom and tossed her phone and clothes on the counter. She cranked the knobs on the shower until it was steaming. Shedding her clothes, she cussed when she saw her bra covered in chocolate sauce. Fuck, that's not coming out dammit.

A half an hour later she emerged from the shower, fingers efficiently resembling raisins and hair stuck to her skin. She glanced over the clothes she picked out, white shorts blue blouse and flats. Snatching the shirt off the counter she sent her phone tumbling to the ground.Oh, shit. I was supposed to call Bella.

A small grin turned up the corners of her lips when she recalled the cheerful blonde. They had been good friends for years even tho she was always a couple grades above her. Now that she was graduated and in college, Lovina saw her even less but they still were close. She dialed her number from memory and couldn't help but smile while listening to the dull ring sing in her ear.

"Lovina!" a beautifully recognizable voice chirped.

"Bella!" Lovina laughed, just imagining the blonde's eyes light up as she jumped off her couch.

"Ohmigosh, I saw what happened at the party! Damn girl, you know how to shut them boys up, but I couldn't believe-"

"Bella! How about talking over some gelato in..." she pulled the phone away from her face for a split second to make out the time, "twenty minutes?"

"Okay, where?" The smile in her voice was apparent. When they were younger they used to walk down to the same little family owned gelato shop and gossip for hours, long after they finished their treat. The little shop became their favorite place to hang out, and the family who worked there gave them a discount. Who am I to pass up half fucking priced gelato? That shit was fuel for the soul.

"You know where," Lovina giggled, laughter spilled over the line through the phone.

"Okay, see you soon, love!"

Lovina hung up, smile still on her face when she realized from a glance in the mirror that she still clutched a fluffy white towel around her torso. She ditched the towel as a damp lump on the cool cream tiles and changed into her expertly selected outfit. After throwing on some makeup and drying her hair best to her ability, she crept out of the steamy bathroom. The hallway in comparison was chilled and refreshing, but she couldn't quite enjoy it. Striking up a conversation with Gilbert did not seem to make the top of her list of things she wanted to do at the moment. That was one awkward situation that she could just let simmer out with a little time, and then she could pretend it never even happened. Why did I bolt so quickly? I just fucking ran away, making things as awkward as shit. With a sigh, she again inwardly cursed herself while creeping around the corner.

The living room was set up so it was connected to the kitchen by a doorway, but the upstairs hallway was visible from the living room thanks to a lack of wall. Instead there was railing that she promised to slide down one day, but with the situation at hand, it wasn't very helpful. Lovina dashed across the hall, and tiptoed down the stairs, the clatter of dishes echoed from the kitchen along with a pair of bare feet padding across the fake tile. She dashed past the doorway, but paused when she saw him.

He picked up the envelope with his left hand and stared at it for a second before frisbeeing it into the trash. He pulled out a chair a flopped down, his shoulders weren't tense, and his expression wasn't chiseled with grief. She could tell he was flipping something over in his head, examining it, and then flipping it again. He let his head rest on his palm, fingers embedded in his hair when her jerked up and looked at his hand. He saw the chocolate and a handsome smile blossomed on his face. He shook his head and chuckled softly, muttering something Lovina could not make out. He stood and Lovina ducked away, scribbling on a napkin that she was out with Bella and that she'd be home soon. She slipped away as silently as she could with a warm feeling nestled in her chest, like the sun on a summer day kissing her skin in a field. Like that, but condensed into a ball, and swimming around her ribcage.

She leaned against the front door and smiled, remembering his smile, the way it reached his eyes, leaving ghosts of little creases in the corners. In that moment she'd do anything to know exactly what coaxed that smile out of the egotistical man. Holy crap. I'm losing it. This is supposed to be a fake fling, so strings, nothing. We weren't even supposed to really be friends, it was just a ploy to manipulate Antonio. Right? Doubt spun around in her mind. She pushed herself off the door and began walking, she switched to autopilot, and her feet took her in the direction she needed to go, because all she could think about is how he asked her… No. I just need to fix things with Toni, get my sister with that german gym-freak, and put thing back where they should be. Gilbert is dangerous to be involved with. Come on. As a member as the Bad Touch Trio, that sets off a few fucking flags right there. But I guess Tony is a part of their little gang too…

Lovina gnawed on her bottom lip, do I really know that tomato bastard like I thought I did? Is he really who he acts like around me? Fuck, right now is soooo not the fucking time to think about this. Maybe Bella can help me.

As the shop came into view, so did the perky blonde. Perched on one of the metal chairs outside the store, on leg crossed over the other, big green eyes scanning the clearing until landing on the long legged brunette. She hopped up. "Lovi!" She grinned and ran to meet Lovina. The blonde caught her in a suffocating hug and cried out, "it has been so long since we have had gelato here! too long," she pouted.

"I couldn't agree more," Lovina sighed, flicking her bangs out of her eyes. Bella grabbed her hand and drug her inside so they could order their usual and giggle about how cute the cashier was. Once it was their turn to pay Lovina smacked her forehead.

"Shit, I forgot money," she growled, she was so caught up in her stealthy exit the thought of cash fled her mind.

A hand gave the cute cashier a ten, and Lovina jumped back. The hand that came to her rescue was connected to another pair of familiar green eyes. "Antonio, you didn't have to," she mumbled uncomfortably.

"My treat, it isn't every day I get to treat two lovely ladies to gelato," he smiled at her and Bella and pocketed the change. In the corner of her eye she saw Bella suppress a blush. "You don't mind if I steal her for a second, do you Bel?" he asked.

She looked uncertain, the scene from the party without a doubt playing through her head. Lovina's lips pressed into a thin line before saying, "Antonio, I appreciate you picking up the tab, but we-"

"No, Lovina it's fine. Just don't keep her long," Bella sighed.

"No worries, I have somewhere to be anyways. I'll make it quick." he smiled, swinging what looked like a grocery bag full of produce and beer. Odd, her prefers wine...beer is for when he wants to get drunk.

Gelato abandoned on the table he pulled her around the corner, she yanked her wrist away, threw her shoulders back and glared. "Lovina, I'm sorry."

Uh, not what I expected.

"I'm so sorry. You were right, I should have never been drinking at that party, and I'm sorry for yelling at you at Gil's when it was none of my business, and I'm sorry I have been such a dick lately. I'm just so sorry," he said in a rush.

Lovina just stared, her face steeled. Not as much because she hated his guts at the moment, but because she was not sure how to handle this.

"Please come home."

"No," her mind flashed back to how broken Gilbert looked, and the way he just stared into the table rejecting her offer for a beer. I cannot leave him like that. there's no way.

"Lovi, I'm a mess without you. I can't think straight!" he threw his arms up in the air, " I miss your cooking, I miss it when you call me names, I miss your singing in the shower when you think noone can hear you. I thought you didn't want me, so I thought maybe Feli could be what I wanted you to be, but I was wrong," he sighed, voice cracking.

She went cold. "You tried to replace me with Feliciana."

"Yes, but hell was I wrong," he dropped to his knees, "She's not you, she'll never be you. Noone else is like you, I know because I have looked. I've tried, but you're your own brand, you're unique, beautiful."

"After everyone placing Feliciana over me, after everyone just adored my sister and thought nothing of me, I thought you were different Antonio."

"I am, I can be. I made a mistake," he rose from his knees, "Chica, I can make it up to you. I'll do anything."

"You were so wrong."

"What?"

"I did want you and you broke me," she sighed, "Break up with her."

"Right away, I promise. I was already going to, I'm just scared of hurting her."

Lovina's face twisted into a snarl, and pushed him back, not hard, but still enough to make him wobble, "Do. Not. Hurt. Her. You got yourself into this, and now prove to me you can get out without scaring my sister."

His eyes were serious, "I promise," he looked away, "just please come home, Lovina. I'm begging you damn it. I won't even say a word when we go pick tomatoes and you eat half of them before we even get home."

It was so tempting. To go home, have everything go back to normal. Make pasta with my sister every night, and spend afternoons curled up next to the Spaniard watching movies. No more of the lies and nonsense. But she thought back to Gilbert. His rare sweet smiles, the way he looks when he's asleep. So innocent. She thought of the way her body reacted when they sit on the couch playing video game and watching TV when her leg was merely pressed against her own. She thought of they was they danced that night, that kiss beneath the stars. Even though they were drunk, she replayed that moment over and over in her head when she couldn't sleep. She remembered how he silently let his tears roll onto her shoulder when he read the letter, and how she didn't say a word because she knew how much he needed someone there who understands. Someone else who know what it feels like keep their secrets locked away, and their guard forever up. He needed someone who knew his pains and saw through his defense.

"I'm sorry, Gil needs me."

His eyes darkened, "I know Gilbert, and he is nothing but a player. Each girl he just sees as a challenge that he wants to conquer, don't be another notch in his bedpost."

"How could you say that about your best friend?" she spat.

"Because I know him well enough. He will feed you bullshit, tell you what you want to hear, and then when he gets what it is that he wants, he'll dump you. Like the rest."

Startled, she stepped back. His once cheerful smile was pulled back in a snarl, his jaw clenched so hard she saw the strain in his next despite the dimness of the alleyway. He towered over her, but she kept her chin up high even though a flicker of panic rushed through her. He was so dangerous and feral looking when he had said that. No trace of the beaming sunshine in his eyes were left. Unrecognizable.

He spotted the fear in her and flinched, "I"m a mess without you. Come home."

"Elizabeta is getting hitched, Gilbert got the invitation today."

He gasped, honest concern in his eyes, "Shit."

"He needs me right now," she recalled how Ludwig shook his head at her when Gilbert broke down. He was telling her not to console him, almost anyone would jump off that train in a heartbeat in hope of protecting his pride, but she knew better, "I can't just leave him."

Silence stretched between them, she knew when she played that card, it would make it final. It would remind him that he is her boyfriend, that she is choosing Gilbert over him. Am I taking this act too far? I can't tell where my pseudo life starts and my real feelings begin. She knew she could've said yes to everything he said, but she didn't, Why not?

"You looked beautiful at the party," he mumbled, looking at the ground next to her shoes, "I would have given anything to have taken you in place of Gilbert, I lost it when I saw you guys there. Absolutely beautiful."

Suddenly he seemed closer than he was moments ago, she looked away, "But you always do, with your big brown eyes and soft skin," his fingers grazed over her cheek, leaving a deep blush. Something in her chest fluttered the way it did when he used to wave at her from across the fields. He leaned in close and her breath caught.

"This is wrong," she whispered.

"Then why does it feel so right?" he asked, closing the distance with a gentle loving kiss. innocent and sweet. His hand found her hips and he traced circles with his thumbs.

She froze in shock.

This was it, this was what she wanted. Antonio wanted her. She had been pining over this man for year, imagining what their first kiss would be like. And here I am. She dreamed of those lips brushing against hers in a flurry of emotions that would transcend anything she had ever felt.

But she stood motionless.

She pushed him back.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have," he whispered breathlessly.

"You really shouldn't have."

"Lovi…"

"Shut up," she screwed her eyes closed, "I can't- I can't do this right now."

"Lovina!" he called, but she was already running down and around the corner and slumped against a brick wall. She didn't care that the corners of the stone dug into her back. She panted, not from the run, but from that kiss. the Damned kiss. Isn't this what I fucking wanted? Why am I running away? Why do I keep running away. Away from Antonio, away from Gilbert, now from Bella. Shit! Bella!

She glanced around the corner, the Spaniard was nowhere in sight, she jogged back to the shop, the blonde politely twiddling her thumbs by her empty bowl of gelato.

"Hey...yours kinda melted."

"Lovina looked down at her pool of sugar water and hot tears made her way down her face.

Bella jumped up, "Honey if it bothers you that much we can buy you more, I have money," she consoled.

Lovina coughed out a laugh and shook her head, "Aw, do I have to go kick Tony's ass?" Bella murmured and pulled the shaking italian in a hug.

"Bella, I don't know what I'm doing."

"Shh, it's okay. You know what, forget the gelato, go home grab a pillow and a toothbrush and spend the night at my place. We can figure out whatever is going on okay?"

Lovina nodded her head and sniffed.

The blonde pulled away, "Come on now, Lovi, you're smudging your makeup all up," she ran her thumb tenderly under Lovino's eyes, attempting to rid her of the ugly dark eyeliner and mascara smudges. "There, good as new. Want me to walk you home?"

Lovina cleared her throat, "no, i'm fine. I'm fine," she took a deep breath, " I'll explain later on tonight."

"Mkay, see you then."

With a hug Lovina left, kind of wishing she requested Bellas company.

She opened the door with the key Gil gave her, and she slipped inside to see Gilbert pulling his arms through his leather jacket.

He looked up, "Oh, hey. I got your note, I'm heading over to Francis's house. You gonna be fine for the night? You know where everything is, we are just going to break open a few beers at his place, no bars."

She let out a breath she didn't realize she was holding and couldn't help but smile. She nodded, "have fun,"

"I might get back really late,"

"Don't drink and drive, idiot."

"Then I probably won't make it back until morning. Speaking of which, don't touch the Ferarri."

"Fuck!"

He laughed, and made his way to the door but paused, "you okay?"

"Hmm? Yeah, I'm fine."

He grabbed her waist, and pulled her closer, inspecting her, "Your makeup is all smudged."

Shit. "Oh, the damn breeze was tossing stuff around and something got in my eyes."

He raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.

"Oh, and I won't even be home tonight, I made last minute plans to sleepover at Bella's,"

"Home?" he grinned

She blushed, "you know what I fucking mean."

"There she is, so I guess I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah."

He made his way to the doorway, stopped and looked over his shoulder, unsaid words on his lips. He thought twice, and kept them to himself but still stood there in the doorway.

Lovina walked up to him and encircled her arms around his torso and rested her head on his back. He stiffened, but quickly lost the tension in his muscles and sighed.

"I don't like saying goodbye to people either," she mumbled into his jacket, "even if it's for a little bit."

He turned so her head was under his chin. "And here I thought I was the only one," he pulled away and looked at her, and lightly brushed away her bangs. His red eyes searching hers.

Her breath quickened and so did his, but something in his eyes shifted and her kissed her forehead and quickly made his way to his car. She watched him pull out of the driveway and drive down the road to his friends mansion.

She went back inside and grabbed a soda from the fridge before collecting her stuff to sleepover at Bella's house. She pushed aside a few beer and froze. She grabbed a beer and stared at the label. Mother fucker.

The beer had the same label as the ones in Antonio's grocery bag. She laughed Those three always buy that fucking brand as a tradition when they get together to get drunk. Weirdos. She put the beer back in the fridge and popped open her soda and froze. She grabbed the bottle again. Wait, those three always buy that brand as a tradition when they get together to get drunk, and Gilbert is headed over to 'break open a few beers', when Antonio had 'somewhere to be later'.

She ran her finger around the rim of the soda top.

She shrugged off the idea, Gilbert and Antonio weren't exactly on the best of terms as of late. They wouldn't go drinking together, especially since Antonio has such a loose mouth after a beer or two. That would just be begging for a fight.