A/N: I don't own this, we all know who does. If I did, Rpattz would be mopping my kitchen floor right now. What? I can't get the kids to do it, plus he has those nice biceps... :D
This is unbeta'd, so any and all mistakes belong to me. That's how I roll.
This is for my wifey, Mrs. Robward. You should see the angst and heart break she's writing... Oh wait, you will. :D
Thanks to Luxure & EdwardsBloodType for prereading this. EBT is making a cake today. 3 layers. Sounds yummy...
**disclaimer **
This story is a bit taboo. Gotta mention something about last chapter. Bella's husband, buying the pregnancy thing. We all know that sometimes men have vasectomies and then go on to father children. Sometimes the things just don't take, or the tubes will not be cut, or those little swimmers are just determined little cusses. :D Anyway, The Reverend is very much about the whole God's Plan and destiny and if something is supposed to happen, it will, kinda thing. Remember, he and Bella are having sex, when he wants to. It's just not good for Bella. He probably thinks it's great, but we'll get a bit more insight on his thoughts later in the story. For now, he buys it that this is his child. He's never had a reason to doubt Bella before, she's always just done what he wanted. So why would he start now? That being said...the next chapter. :D
~:O:~:O:~:O:~
… Chapter Ten - Bump … Edward …
~:O:~:O:~:O:~
You avoid me. You drive me mad. You make me take risks I shouldn't.
I have to find you, speak to you, hold you.
Finally, the night of Prom, I see you.
I'm picking up Leah. She's beautiful, her hair curled and long, her eyes so dark and sparkling. If only she were enough for me. How I wish she was the one my heart beats for.
Behind her stands you, looking tired. Sad.
You put on a smile, taking pictures of us. I don't stop looking at you.
When you move, the baggy shirt you're wearing stretches across your belly and I see it.
The bump.
The baby that's growing within you.
It's true. And by the way your eyes glance toward mine, I know you see me looking at you.
You know that I know.
The dance passes by in a daze. I'm not really here, I'm really alone with you, somewhere no one will ever find us. I want that.
"My mom said I can stay out all night," Leah whispers to me, hinting for the intimacy she craves.
I lie.
"I got in trouble. I'm kinda grounded. My mom said I could come here, but then I have to go home. I'll drop you at the party if you want."
Her face drops. She's sad, and it kills me that I'm making her that way. But the need to see you is stronger.
She's riding with her friends, blowing me off and flirting with some guy named Sam. I can see her casting glances at me, seeing if I'm upset.
I'm not. I hope she likes him, that he can make her happy.
I know I can't.
Your husband is out of town, again, some kind of convention.
I know where the spare key is, and I park around the corner, sneaking into the dark house.
You're in your bed, quiet, still. I think you're sleeping, until you move, and I hear you gasp for air.
You're sobbing. Crying.
My heart has never hurt so much.
"Bella?" I whisper, going to you, pulling you into my arms.
"Edward?" you say, looking at me like I'm a crazy person. I probably am. I basically just broke into your house.
"Why didn't you tell me?" I ask. My fingers wipe away your tears.
Your head shakes, your eyes close, you won't look at me.
"There's nothing to tell."
"You're pregnant. I think I have a right to know," I say, suddenly feeling angry.
"It's not yours, it's his."
Your words cut me, slice through my wounded heart. I know you're lying.
I look in your eyes, and see nothing but pain...and truth.
"This is over, Edward. We can't ever be together, no one would understand. We would destroy my family, and yours. My daughter would hate me forever. I can't do it anymore."
I stumble backward, bumping into the wall, which holds me upright.
"No, Bella don't do this."
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
Your words are like knives. I have to get away, to leave. I can't be here, knowing you're carrying his child, choosing him over me.
Not when I know that if you asked me to, I'd get in my car and drive to the ends of the earth, just so that I could hide away with you. So that we could be together.
So that I could love you. Freely, openly, the way I want.
But that will never happen.
I nearly fall down the stairs, grief overwhelming me. I need to get away.
I get home, going to my room, locking the door. Keeping everyone out.
My tux hits the floor and I go to my night stand. Tucked deep inside, under the paper lining the bottom, is a picture of you. You don't know I have it.
You're so beautiful in it. It's from your high school year book. Leah showed it to me once in the school library. I copied it the next day.
Your smile is so bright, your hair in a pony tail, your cheer leading shirt riding up just a bit, showing a sliver of your stomach.
My thumb traces over it. I want you so much. Why can't you be that now? Why couldn't I have been born 18 years earlier?
Why can't I be the one making a life with you?
Why can't it be my baby you're carrying?
Why can't I be enough for you?
~:O:~:O:~:O:~
A/N: Ohhhh, Edward. :( Am I the only one that wants to just wrap him up in a big blanket...and do bad, bad things to him? :D
Next chapter...Bella's got some answers for you...insight. You'll like it. :)
Reviews are better than dancing with Edward at the Prom.
Leave one.
