Chapter TEN

Sami stood up and impatiently began to pace around the little cell, throwing anxious glances at the doorway out into the custody area.

"That won't make your lawyer turn up any quicker honey," the woman sharing a cell with her cautioned her.

"I know," said Sami distractedly, "I just want to get out of here and go home."

"So what did you do?" the woman asked her with a curious tilt of her head.

"Just a little damage to property," said Sami airily, trying to make it sound like no big deal.

"Oh?" pushed the woman.

"I don't really want to talk about it," said Sami with a grimace.

"Honey what else are we gonna do?" she said quite reasonably, "We're both stuck here - may as well tell each other our stories."

Sami shrugged.

"I guess," she sighed.

"I'm Crystal by the way," she introduced herself, sticking out her hand to shake.

"Sami," she said and smiled politely at the woman.

She looked to be in her mid fifties, well dressed and accessorised. She obviously had money and taste and Sami couldn't help but wonder what she was doing here.

"So Sami," said Crystal, "What's your story babe?"

"I pushed a statue out a second floor window down onto a car in the street below," said Sami and then gave her an anxious look, "But it was an accident - I swear!"

"Fair enough," said Crystal, seeming to take Sami's story in her stride.

"What about you?" she asked curiosity getting the better of her, apparently she'd learnt nothing about curiosity and the cat even after the events of tonight.

"Well mine wasn't an accident," said Crystal unapologetically, "I tried to run down my husband in my SVU."

"Oh my god!" said Sami, shocked, "What happened?"

"Ah the little bastard is more nimble than he looks and got out of the way in time so I only managed to run over a foot," sighed Crystal in disappointment.

"Oh," said Sami weakly, "But why were you trying to run him down at all?"

"The oldest reason in the book," said Crystal with a roll of her eyes, "The creep is banging his secretary! I mean his secretary - could it have been more of a cliché, I ask you?! She's all of about twenty, tits and ass like rocks, meanwhile look at me…"

Crystal gave a bit of a despondent wave down at her body but Sami could see nothing wrong with her.

"I think you look fantastic," protested Sami.

"That's because I'm all trussed up like a turkey," sighed Crystal, "When I'm naked I look like I'm melting but you're too young to know anything about that yet. Wait till you have kids and then you'll know what I mean."

"I have three," said Sami.

"You're doing well sweetheart," said Crystal, clearly impressed, "But boobs like that aren't going to defy gravity forever."

Sami looked down at her breasts that had always been rather ample and put a worried hand to them.

"No?" she asked anxiously.

She'd never really thought about it before now but Crystal was making her worry.

"You married?" asked Crystal suddenly.

"Aha," nodded Sami, still worrying about her boobs now.

"Bet you he loves those puppies," said Crystal knowingly.

"Oh yeah," said Sami, answering without thinking and then suddenly blushed.

She wasn't sure why she was sharing so much with this woman and also wasn't' so sure that EJ would be exactly thrilled to know that they were discussing him like this but then again - he was never going to know.

"Mm," said Crystal, "Until they find a pair they like better and then it's all over."

"EJ's not like that," protested Sami.

"Is he gay?" asked Crystal.

"No, of course not!" said Sami hotly.

"Got a penis?" to which Sami didn't know what to say.

"Then he's like that," said Crystal confidently.

"Look Crystal," said Sami hesitantly, "I know that your having a hard time of it right now but not all men are like…"

"Bob," Crystal supplied readily, "Bob Ball."

"Like Bob…" she continued on and then frowned suddenly.

"Wait… Ball?" said Sami hesitantly, not meaning to be rude but unable to help herself, "You're name is Crystal Ball?"

"Yeah," said the other woman flatly, "That should have been my first clue that this marriage was a mistake! My maiden name was Crystal Wazcycni and I thought that was bad!"

"Crystal Ball isn't bad," protested Sami, trying to be kind, "It's… it's memorable."

That was the best adjective she could come up with on short notice but it seemed to please Crystal well enough.

"I guess," she shrugged.

"I'm sorry about your trouble Crystal," said Sami trying again, "But like I was trying to say, not all men are like Bob."

"All men are dogs," said Crystal flatly, "Some are just better at faking it for longer - that's all."

"Don't you think that's a bit harsh?" said Sami, wrinkling her nose up, "I mean, I've had some bad luck… well more disastrous luck really with men over the years but now I've found the one I'm meant to be with and it's changed everything for me."

"Don't tell me let me guess," said Crystal with a roll of her eyes, "He rings you from work everyday, tells you all the time that he loves you, you make love nearly every day… how am I doing?"

"Well yes," said Sami a little taken aback by the woman's insight.

"So did Bob in the beginning," said Crystal with a hard look, "And then I'd say about a year in, he started to roam. It was just little things… didn't call me every day, less sex… he started dressing up more and wearing cologne."

"He was having affairs even back then?" said Sami in horror.

"Yeah," said Crystal, "I was just too dumb and trusting to realise but if I knew then what I know now…"

Crystal gave Sami a kind of wild look.

"I'd go back in time, take his testicles and make earrings out of them!" she said with a triumphant look, "Then we'd see who was boss!"

Crystal mimed snipping motions then plucking the newly snipped imaginary items out of the air and held them up to her ears like earrings and proudly showed them off.

"Wow!" said Sami looking a little taken aback, "Well that's really… graphic… of you Crystal."

"Honey," said Crystal with a sad shake of her head, "Do yourself a favour…"

"What?" asked Sami a little nervously as to what this slightly manic woman might suggest.

"Ditch that fella of yours before he ditches you and become a lesbian," she said looking completely and utterly serious, "That's what I'm going to do."

"Um… I don't think that's how that works," said Sami a little uncertainly.

"Oh how hard can it be," said Crystal breezily, dismissing her concern, "At least you wouldn't have to train them what to do down there."

"Well, no… I guess not," said Sami, a little bewildered.

She looked down at her watched and prayed that EJ was on his way already before she caught crazy from her cell mate.

oooOOOOooo

EJ stood at the top of the stairs to the police department and took a deep breath, hoping against hope that his favourite desk sergeant had finished his shift. After all it was hours later so the chances were good. EJ pushed open the doors and the first person he saw was Sergeant Christoff sipping on a mug of coffee and doing a crossword in his usual position behind the front desk.

Didn't this man have a home to go to?!

EJ sighed and putting his best foot forward he walked up to the desk and smiled at the man.

"Good evening Sergeant Christoff," he said calmly, "How are you this fine evening?"

The older man straightened up and folded his arms in front of his chest and shook his head at EJ.

"I know," said EJ with a smile, "I can't seem to keep away today - I think it's your excellent coffee, or possibly the rapport we've built up… it's rather special I think."

"You're one slow learner aren't you?" said the sergeant flatly, yet again not enjoying EJ's sense of humour.

"Oddly enough you're not the first person to point that out to me," said EJ with a quirk of his lips.

"Name?" said the Sergeant tersely.

"Samantha DiMera," said EJ and then gave him a little grimace as the other man arched an eyebrow at him and nodded in confirmation, "My wife."

Yet again Sergeant Christoff flicked through his paper work for him.

"DiMera, Samantha," he read out in his monotonous tone, "Wilful damage of private and public property."

"What kind of damage to what kind of property?" asked EJ with a little sigh.

"A one of a kind piece of sculptured artwork through a second storey window onto a car below," said the sergeant, supplying the finer details.

"Guess that will do it," said EJ stoically and then a thought occurred, "I don't suppose there was another woman with her at the time - tall, blonde, kind of mouthy?"

"Your wife was alone when the police officer ran her down," he was informed.

"Just checking," said EJ ruefully.

"So is that every member of your family that has been sitting in my jail cell today?" asked Sergeant Christoff flatly.

"Well I do have twin babies at home," said EJ jokingly, "Do you have a paediatric area of your jail cells at all?"

Sergeant Christoff was not amused by EJ's flippancy and just gave him that hard stare that EJ was becoming increasingly familiar with. EJ didn't know why he kept trying with this man - he just couldn't seem to help himself.

"Sorry," he apologised with a grimace, "Wildly inappropriate thing to joke about I know."

"I'm sure I'll be seeing your kids soon enough," said the sergeant stoically.

EJ made a bit of an offended face at that but at the minute it was pretty hard to play the 'we're not that kind of a family' card with the events of today.

"You know the way," said the sergeant, summarily dismissing him and going back to his crossword puzzle.

"By this stage I should have my own locker here," said EJ under his breath and headed off to see Sami.

oooOOOOooo

"So is that your guy?" asked Crystal, looking at the impossibly handsome man walking towards them.

"Yes," smiled Sami, dreading the upcoming conversation but happy as always to see him.

"Oh honey," said Crystal sympathetically, "You are boned."

"What do you mean?" asked Sami worriedly.

"That is a full time job you've got there," said Crystal shaking her head sadly at her, "You're going to be beating every woman… and man… with a pulse off with a stick to try and hang onto that hunk o' love you've got going on there."

"EJ loves me," protested Sami.

"Bob loved steak but even he didn't want to eat it everyday," said Crystal knowingly.

Sami looked back at EJ as he walked towards them and tried to ignore the feeling of dread that her new found confidante was causing in her.

oooOOOOooo

Thirty minutes later EJ and Sami were driving back to the mansion after EJ had secured her release. At this point the thought he could fill out the paperwork in his sleep! Sami could feel the inquisitive looks he was throwing her every now and then but determinedly ignored them. She hadn't been forth coming in the exact details that led up to the incident with him. She could tell that he wasn't going to let it go but was keeping stubbornly quiet on the subject until she was left with no other option. Sami frowned and sat up straighter in her seat when she saw him pull into a little alley way and turn off the car engine.

"What are you doing?" she asked in annoyance, "This we're not home yet - I want to go home to my children EJ."

"And you will," said EJ, perfectly agreeably, "As soon as you tell me what happened tonight."

"You know what happened tonight," she hedged.

"I know what the police report said," he disagreed with her, "But I can't help but feel I'm missing out on a few pertinent details along the way somehow. Now I thought you were planning to see Chelsea tonight - at least, that was what you told your mother and I."

"She cancelled," Sami mumbled the lie.

"Oh," said EJ and scratched the tip of his nose thoughtfully.

He twisted around in his seat and regard her carefully whilst Sami just looked resolutely ahead.

"So to recap," mused EJ straight faced, "Chelsea cancelled her plans with you at the last moment, so instead of coming home you decided to topple a large piece of art work onto a car from a great height - is that about right sweetheart?"

"It was an accident!" she said through gritted teeth, "I didn't mean to do it!"

"Alright then," he countered smoothly, "Precisely what was your intention for this evening Samantha?"

"I… I…" Sami bit her lip nervously, really not wanting to do this.

EJ arched an eyebrow at her, silently encouraging her to continue.

"I was following Rolf," she admitted in rush.

EJ's other eyebrow shot up in surprise at her admission - was everyone in the family destined to develop stalker tendencies?

"Because?" he prompted her.

"Because I wanted to know what he did on his nights off!" she said in annoyance, crossing her arms in front of her and pouting, "There, happy now?"

"Actually I'm still a little confused," admitted EJ, "How does wanting to know what Rolf does on his night off end up with you destroy private and public property? And while we're on the subject - couldn't you have just asked Rolf."

"Oh right!" she scoffed, "Like he would have told me the truth! I wouldn't have believed whatever he told me so I would have had to follow him to make sure so this way I had the element of surprise on my side. He wouldn't know I was there."

"Well he would have been the only one," commented EJ dryly, "You do seem to have left your mark somewhat darling."

"I followed him to that building," she said, ignoring his humour, "I went upstairs and saw what he was doing and it was horrifying! I guess I kind of stepped backwards or something and I hit the statue, it fell out of the window and landed on the car …"

"So…?" prompted EJ when she left it at that, "What is it that Rolf does do on his night's off then?"

"Hey if you want to know so bad why don't you go there yourself and find out?" she scowled at him, really not wanting to relive the horrors of the night.

"I would sweetheart but we can't really afford the damage bill," he told her straight faced.

He quirked an eyebrow at her.

"So?"

"He's in an painting class," she said flatly.

"A painting class?" repeated EJ in confusion, "So what is so horrifying about that? I mean, how bad can his painting be?"

"I didn't say he did the painting," she said through clenched teeth, "I said he was in a painting class."

"So what?" asked EJ a bit bewilder now, "He teaches the class."

"No," she bit out, still looking straight out the window and not at him.

"But what else is there…?" EJ trailed off as he realised, "Oh…"

EJ put his hand to his mouth to hide the grin that was rapidly spreading over his face.

"He was the model," he said then, the amusement obvious in his voice, "The nude model… I'm right aren't I Samantha? You saw Rolf naked?"

"Don't say those two words together!" she said hotly, her cheeks going bright red, "Don't you ever say those words again do you hear me!"

"Oh Samantha," he said, the laughter burbling up inside of him at the stricken look on her face.

He imagined her standing there, looking in and seeing Rolf in all his glory. It would have been priceless!

"Don't you dare laugh at me EJ DiMera!" Sami warned him heatedly when she saw the corners of his mouth begin to turn up, "I am not in the mood - I've been traumatised for life you know!"

"This?" said EJ, pointing to the growing smile on his face, "It's a nervous tic darling and I've had it since childhood. I'm quite sensitive about it actually so if you wouldn't mind not drawing attention to it please."

"OH!" said Sami in annoyance at his flippancy.

EJ laughed out loud then which only made Sami more upset. She'd had a harrowing evening and all he could do was laugh at her. Well she was going to show him!

"Stop laughing at me EJ otherwise…" she threatened him, her eyes narrowing dangerously.

"I'm not laughing at you I'm laughing at you, I'm laughing with you," he protested, with a wide grin on his face, "Besides, what are you going to do to stop me eh? Push a large statue on top of me?"

EJ seemed to find more amusement in the thought and began to laugh again which just made Sami want to show him who was boss. She released her seat belt and turned towards him, an evil gleam in her eye.

"You think you're so clever don't you?" she accused him in annoyance.

"I have my moments," he smirked back at her, "And there is nothing you can do about this one sweetheart, I definitely have the upper hand - you made your bed and now you're just going to have to deal with the fall out… i.e. my amusement, consider it your payment for my legal services tonight."

"Is that right?" she asked him in a low voice, "So you're just going to keep on taunting me with this until you think I've paid my dues, is that it?"

"Well…" EJ considered that for a moment, "… yes, actually."

He gave her a teasingly look then and started to laugh again but Sami was not going to let him think he'd won this round. She leant closer to him until and rubbed her body up against him as he sat there beside her. EJ sent her an amused, quizzical look but seemed unconcerned.

"What's this?" he teased her, "Think you can distract me? I think you will find me made of sterner stuff than that young lady. I've got a lot more mockery intended for you."

"Is that right?" she murmured.

Sami's hand went to rest on his stomach before disappearing down the front of his pants to find his growing hardness. EJ gave a strangled little hiss as her hand wrapped around him and squeezed almost painfully.

"What's the matter EJ?" she purred up at him, "Nothing to say now - cat got your tongue?"

"Well not my tongue, no," he said ironically and gave her a little smirk, his breathing a little uneven now.

With her other hand she undid his belt and unzipped his fly.

"Samantha sweetheart," he said tightly, "What are you doing?"

Sami just smiled knowingly up at him before ducking her head down and taking his already impressively stiffening member into her mouth. EJ bucked up and made a strangled cry at the feeling of her warm mouth sliding over his rigid length, a hand instinctively going to the roof of the car, bracing himself.

"Samantha!" he gasped, as her hand tightened around the remainder of him that wouldn't fit into her mouth and began to work on him.

Suck, pump, roll and lick… she very quickly found a delicious rhythm around him and EJ's head lolled back at the sensations she was wringing from her body. He buried both hands in her soft blonde hair, his fingers pressing on her scalp and encouraging her in her ministrations. His breathing began to come in short, gasping pants and he knew he didn't have long to go.

Suddenly an elderly couple walked by in front of the alley they were parked in, taking their little dog for a walk. EJ tensed, trying to put a calm look on his face for their benefit so that they wouldn't suspect what was going on in the car. Sami wasn't making it easy for him though because she felt him stiffen and took it as a sign to go harder and faster which she did. EJ whimpered under his breath as the elderly couple turned to look at him, smiling and nodding a good evening to him. EJ tried to smile back but doubted he pulled it off as Sami quickly bought him to his peak.

He desperately willed the old couple to keep moving and stop looking at him before he lost it completely but they were walking unbelievably slowly. His breaths were coming in short, distressed pants now as he clung to his control, trying to look like he wasn't about to come in his wife's mouth while he sat in his car. The couple finally moved past the alley way and EJ nearly cried with relief, closing his eyes and giving himself over to Sami's skilful mouth.

"Oh yes!" he groaned happily, "Oh sweetheart… YES!"

Sami heard him cry out and then she had the hot, salty taste of him suddenly spurting into her mouth as she continued in her self appointed task until she was satisfied he had nothing left to give her. She released his now spent thickness from her mouth, sucking on him hard as she did and wrenching a last pleased shudder from him. Sami did up his pants again and then sat back on her side of the car.

"So," she said cheekily, seeing the completely dazed look on his face and wiping the corners of her mouth with her fingers, "Are you right to drive or what?"

"Give me a minute," said EJ weakly, holding up a hand to her, "I can't seem to remember how to drive just at the moment but I'm sure it will come back to me."

Sami laughed at his humour and he joined in, albeit a little shakily. He leant over then and pulled her into a hard kiss.

"You're amazing," he told her dreamily.

"Well you would say that after that," she said with a smirk, "We just won't mention this ever again - alright? No more teasing me!"

"What will be my punishment if I do?" he asked her with a cheeky grin.

"You won't get to find out what that little experience did for me," said Sami smugly, seeing the way his eyes perked up with interest.

"Really?" he asked her impishly, "And what might that be?"

"Drive us home and I'll show you," she told him calmly.

EJ quickly turned the engine on and put the car into gear and Sami gave him an amused look.

"I see your driving prowess has returned all of a sudden," she noted dryly.

"It's a miracle," he agreed straight faced.

"I don't think you can call being horny a miracle EJ," she said, trying to give him a stern look but failing miserably.

EJ just laughed and pulled out of the alleyway and broke more than a few speed limits on the way home.

Sami smiled quietly to herself - today had started well, had a definite low in the middle but it looked like it was going to end with a bang… and she was alright with that.