First of all, I think I need to sincerely apologize for the fact that I haven't been uploading for like...three months. :| I had a major writing block and just ugh, it was awful. Anyway, I'm back now and already started writing chapter eleven as well. I hope this short Puck chapter will make up for my major fail in activity and I hope that all of you lovely readers still will
Enjoy!
Chapter ten – Puck
In front of the mirror, Puck was searching his own appearance. He looked at his strong jaw line, his bulged up arms and at his Mohawk. Seriously, how could someone as badass as him like a guy? A guy, for fuck sake. He scowled at himself, shaking his head in disagreement. It couldn't be true. Dudes like him didn't fall for someone of the same sex, they just didn't, it was written in the manual of mankind.
But, like always in these kind of moments lately, Blaine's story repeated itself in his head again. He sighed at himself. "It does make sense somewhere," he said softly to his reflection. But who said he wasn't mistaken his friendship with Sam for something there actually wasn't? Who could tell him if it wasn't just the fact that his best friend was confusing him, because he happened to be gay? The boy with the Mohawk shrugged at himself. Maybe he wasn't "in love" – as people called it – after all. Yeah, that should be it. It probably was the situation, with Sam who likes guys, his depression, their intimacy and so on.
When Puck noticed his hazel eyes harden, as if a wall was thrown up around his soul, he realized that his speculations weren't true. And although he found it hard to accept, he did his best to keep the Puckasaurus in his cage and let Noah come up with a solution and maybe make him see who he really was.
"I…I'm…" he hesitated, because Noah felt like saying it out loud. Of course Puck wasn't sure if it would add to the situation, but he figured to why not give it a shot. There want anything he could lose anyway.
"I…am…I…like…this is pathetic," he stated frustratingly, sliding a hand through his Mohawk and scratching his head. He glanced at himself one more time before walking out of the bedroom. He dropped the towel from his waist onto the floor and put on his boxer briefs, dressing up for school.
Later that day he had football practice. It was pouring down and Puck had figured that coach Beiste must have been on her 'happy' time of the month, because she looked determined to kill him and his teammates. After the fiftieth round of laps – maybe he was exaggerating just a little – she finally called them to hit the showers. Walking back over the soppy field, Puck glanced over at his best friend, who smiled gently at him. Instantly, the boy with the Mohawk felt that warm feeling spreading through his veins again and The Saurus silently cursed at himself.
After some thinking, Puck figured that it might was a good idea to talk to Sam about his…feelings. God, feelings. The last player of their team left the locker rooms and Puck wondered if Sam maybe had a sixth sense, considering he seemed to be a lot slower today. Then again, he could also be tired as fuck, just like Puck, from practice.
"Hey, can we talk?" Puck secretly hated to start a conversation with that sentence, because it seemed to make things a lot heavier, but he didn't know how to begin any other way.
"Yeah, sure, what's up?" Sam responded, putting on his sneakers.
"First of all, how have you been?" Puck sat down next to him on the wooden bench, searching Sam's face with concern in his hazel eyes.
Sam knew what his best friend referred to and he smiled weakly. "I'm okay," he said, "I have been having those nightmares again, though.""
Puck nodded understandingly and sighed. "Yeah, I guess what happened has taken his toll." He rubbed Sam's back soothingly. "Have you heard from him since that night?"
The blond shook his head, the smile on his face growing more relieved. "No. And if I would have, I would have told him to fuck off."
Puck couldn't withhold a soft laughter at that, a weight leaving his shoulders.
"Now what's secondly?" Sam suddenly asked.
The Mohawked boy blinked a couple of times since he had already forgotten why he had started the conversation in the first place. He shrugged at the fact that the interest of Sam's well-being did that to his memory.
"Oh, yeah," he thought about how he should start, kicking himself mentally because he hadn't thought of that before, "I think…I'm getting there. You know, with the…confusion…and all."
Sam nodded at him and Puck was happy that his friend always appeared to understand him, even though he wasn't that good with words. Sam stayed silent and Puck knew he was waiting for him to elaborate.
"So…I tried admitting it to myself in the mirror, this morning."
Sam laughed inarticulately and Puck shot him an innocent look, holding his hands up in the air a little.
"Whoa?! What else am I supposed to fucking do?" he exclaimed playfully, glad that they had a moment of laughter, because it was making the atmosphere around them lighter.
"Nothing, nothing, it's fine," Sam apologized with a grin on his face, shaking his head, "and, did it work?"
Puck shook his head in denial. "I don't know, I couldn't say it out loud." Sam's eyebrows furrowed. "The words just wouldn't leave my mouth."
"Do you think they will when we do it together?" the comic freak offered. "I mean, it might help. I feel like you always talk easier when I'm around."
Puck thought about it for a moment and decided that it did make sense. After all, he was always being like Noah when he was around the blond, so maybe it would work. At least Noah didn't have that humongous ego or robust appearance.
"Come here," Sam suddenly moved up from the bench and took Puck's hand, leading him to the full view mirror in the shower room. Puck gulped at the feeling of Sam's hand in his, but soon the feeling vanished and he was looking at his reflection, just like a couple of hours earlier. Only this time, Sam was standing behind him with a confident smile.
"Okay, you ready?" Sam asked.
Puck only nodded.
"Just repeat after me."
Puck nodded again and watched Sam's mouth moving.
"I…"
"I…"
"am…"
"am…"
"gay…"
"Dude, shut up, I'm not," Puck stated, elbowing Sam near his ribcage.
"Ouch, fuck you," Sam hissed, a hand rubbing against the spot where Puck had hit him, "you just said that you have figured stuff out."
"Yeah, duh, but not that I'm gay!" Puck exclaimed, "I'm bi, you moron."
Sam just stood there, smirking at him. It took Puck's mind a moment before it had grasped on why, but then he got it.
"Oh…" he voiced, turning back to the mirror. He looked at himself, right into his own eyes.
"I'm bi," he repeated, "I'm bi… Bi-fucking-sexual… Dude!" He turned to Sam. "Do you know what that means?! My 'to fuck'-list can be expanded now! Holy shit!" He jumped on his heels, pulling Sam into a victorious hug. Their eyes met just inches away from each other and Sam's smirk slowly vanished to a soft smile.
"I'm proud of you," he whispered.
That was the moment when Puck couldn't resist the urge any longer. Noah had taken over and now his entire body craved for just one thing. So he pressed his lips up against Sam's, who gasped in surprise, hesitated, but then answered it by deepening the kiss just when Puck was about to pull away. And so it lasted. Seconds, minutes, hours, it seemed, but when their eyes opened and hazel met emerald, they both knew nothing lasted forever.
Even when dawn had fallen around Lima, Puck still felt enlightened. You could almost say that he felt reborn, lucky, happy… Proud. He wondered if Sam and he were an 'item' now, but figured it didn't matter. Right now, the most important thing in his life was the honesty towards himself. The Puckasaurus was locked in his cage for good and from now on, Noah would be on the surface. And the most amazing thing about that was that Puck felt good about it. He felt right. Reborn.
He was walking down the block of his house into the direction of a home where a boy lived who Puck needed to thank. The rain had stopped and he was avoiding the puddles that had formed on the pavement. A few minutes later he had reached the house and rung the doorbell. Last time he was here it was thundering and not even planned.
The door opened and a middle aged woman stared in his face.
"Who are you?" she said, the slight disgust sounding through her voice.
"I'm Pu-, Noah," Puck quickly corrected himself, "I take it you're Blaine's mother? Nice to meet you, ma'am." The boy with the Mohawk held out his hand politely and he could see the woman hesitating for a second before shaking it.
"Yes, I most certainly am," she answered, still a little stunned by the boy's appearance.
"Is Blaine home?" he asked.
"Puck?" the curly haired boy suddenly showed up from behind his mother, "what are you doing here?"
"I've come to thank you," Puck smiled, surprised by how decent he was acting himself.
"Oh? What for?" Blaine asked while his eyes examined him curiously. His mother elbowed him softly. "Huh? Oh, yeah, sure, come in."
Puck nodded and stepped inside, making a victory dance in his head when he figured that Blaine's mother apparently must have liked him already when she had nudged her son.
"We'll be up in my room, mother," he said to his mom before walking up the stairs. Puck followed him on the familiar way after shooting another nod to Blaine's mom.
"So, why do you wanted to thank me again?" Blaine instantly asked as he closed the door of his bedroom. Puck settled down onto the sofa, the same spot as he had sat before, and looked at him.
"For sharing your story with me, the other day," the badass answered, "I know who I am, now."
Blaine's eyebrows crooked up in surprise. "You do?" He sat down next to him.
"Yup," Puck relaxed, "I'm bi."
"Noah! That's great!" Blaine exclaimed, padding his shoulder, "have you told Sam yet?"
"Well actually, he has helped me to admit it to myself," Puck answered truthfully.
"Really?"
"Yeah, he made me say it..." he gained a dark smirk on his face, "…then we kissed."
Blaine bounced up and down in excitement. "That's so cool!" he exclaimed, "I'm happy for you, dude." He got silent for a moment, seeming to take an opportunity to place the new information, then, his smile brightened again. "Oh my, we can go on double dates!" he stated, "there's this new movie, The Vow, which just aired and me and Kurt were just dying to see it and…"
"Let me stop you right there," Puck interrupted, waving his hand, "we aren't dating, yet. Or at least not official, I think. I don't know, actually."
"Well what's keeping you?!" Blaine asked, almost blasting through the roof in his hyper activity, "you guys would be so cute together…"
"Oh, shut up," Puck scowled, grinning, "but seriously, I don't know. We just…haven't discussed it yet."
It seemed as if Blaine was finally settling down, because he shrugged gently. "Well, I guess that's fine. I mean, one step at a time right?"
"Exactly. And today was a pretty big one."