The moment Pain entered Killer Bee's Hot Topic, he was bombarded by a shrill shriek, which sounded a bit like singing. "Welcome customer, I do not kid. Come and watch me, have sex with a squid, yeah!"

It's hard to describe what Pain actually saw when he turned to see what Killer Bee was doing at the counter, but he knew he'd been very wrong, Orochimaru's weirdness had nothing on Killer Bee.

He tried to drown out the sloshing sounds ringing throughout the Hot Topic, as he browsed its shelves. "There's so many swords here."

Another wave of bad rhyming came. "Customer, don't look away, this squid is a female, so it's not gay, yeah!"

Pain felt vomit well up, in his stomach. He picked up a mug, it read, "'I Heart Squid Sex.'"

"Turns out, this squid has a penis, guess that's what happens, when you have sex with a sea fish!"

"Okay, I can't do this." Pain turned back toward the exit. As he turned, he caught a glimpse of someone suspiciously familiar. As he approached them, he mumbled to himself, "I swear to God, this better not be Orochimaru."

The familiar person, sang along, next to Killer Bee. "Oh yeah, Frank's havin' a good time, he never knew, that he could rhyme."

"Jigokudo, what are you doing here!?" shouted Pain.

Jigokudo took up a gangster stance. "I thought we saw, eyes to eyes, but I guess you're just, a poser in disguise."

"Yeah, we can still see you, we just sorta ignore you. I blocked you out entirely."

"Frank doesn't need, this stuck up loser, he's hangin' with, Killer Bee the bruiser."

Pain sighed. "Well, it seems you've outlived your usefulness. Guess I have to kill you."

Chikushodo raised his hands. "No, wait!"

Pain performed the almighty push, leveling the store.

"What's the big deal, over here?" Killer Bee rose from the ground. "You've fulfilled, my greatest fear. The loss of my store, blood, sweat, and tear, you took away, all that is dear. My squid is dead, my best friend Jed." He took out his swords. "Now I'll replace him, with your head."

"This is the lamest experience, I've ever had." Pain prepared to take on Killer Bee in hand to hand combat.

Killer Bee charged him, slicing furiously with his swords. Pain weaved around them, using his superior agility. "Fighting you is lame, this whole day is lame, I'm so bored, I should never've came. Dammit, now I'm doing it!"

Killer Bee hopped in the air, diving down in a spin. Pain made an effort to dodge, but his coat got caught in the crossfire. "My cloak of eternal sadness and puppy tears, how could you!?"

Killer Bee raised his sword. "Get a grip man, you're fighting Bee, without a plan."

"Try this one." Jigokudo put his hand on Killer Bee's shoulder, summoning the hell king. It ripped out Killer Bee's tongue, dropping him to the floor.

"Jigokudo, you idiot, now the eight tales will run free!" Pain whipped himself into a frenzy.

Jigokudo frowned. "I was just trying to help."

Killer Bee's body turned into a squid tentacle.

"So...he's not dead?" Pain examined the squid tentacle. "I'm not touching that."

"Can I have it?" Jigokudo clapped his hands.

"Knock yourself out." Pain walked away, to seek out the next Hot Topic, sure that nothing could ever reach the level of weirdness he'd witnessed today. As he left his misguided path behind, he could hear the obnoxious giggles Jigokudo made, as he poked the squid tentacle.