BPOV

I'd thought about him every day since that night in New York. I could hardly believe it when he leant down to kiss me, I didn't think it was real at first so it took me a few seconds to respond, but when I did it was magical, like something out of a fairy tale. And then he just left me with no other explanation than "It's not just you, ok?" I swear men are the most difficult creatures on the planet!

It had been 3 weeks since he'd left now, Alice was still with us, because Jasper didn't want her to leave, and I knew that she was in contact with Edward every day, but she said nothing about it. When her phone rang she would head out of the room with a notebook and then come back in with a couple of pages worth of notes.

She had interviewed me a few times, and although she was really very good, our conversation didn't come as easy and fluidly as it had with Edward and I. The questions seemed more like they were prying, and no longer like a conversation. Alice seemed to be working from a list of questions as well, which Edward hadn't felt the need to do.

It was the last night of the tour tonight, and after 8 weeks on the road I was completely ready to just collapse. Alice had only been with us for 3 weeks, so she didn't have the same fatigue that everybody else in the crew seemed to have.

After this show I would get a few days off and then I'd head back to New York to do the cover shoot for Rolling Stone. Alice was beyond excited about it, saying that I would 'make a great cover'. When she mentioned that the offices were in New York I nonchalantly asked where Edward had flown to if he lived and worked in New York. He'd never mentioned living in New York while we were there, and if he lived there, then there was no reason to get a flight anywhere. Alice had told me he was going to stay with his parents for while, and I decided not to delve any deeper, for fear that my heart would combust just thinking about him.

***

I had a good couple of days off after the tour finished. I turned my phone off and just hung out with my friends in Miami. I lay by the pool, topping up my nonexistent tan and reading, trying anything other than thinking about Edward. But every now and again he would appear in my thoughts for absolutely no reason. Alice had agreed to meet me at the JFK and take me to the photo shoot which was in the glamorous location of the Rolling Stone offices. She mentioned to me that Edward hadn't returned back to work yet, and I was disappointed that I wouldn't be able to see him.

When I arrived in New York I scanned the crowd quickly, my eyes falling on Alice and heading straight for her, she pushed her way through the crowd and got us both into my car. My driver, Seth was at the wheel and greeted me with a cheerful 'Good Morning'. I returned the sentiment and slumped down in my seat for the rest of the journey while Alice told me about her and Jasper. Apparently things were going so well that they were considering moving in together into Jasper's New York penthouse.

We got to the offices and I got out of the car, we were greeted at the door by a young man who led us down the stairs into a studio. Somebody brought me a coffee while I spoke with the photographer, he wanted the shoot to be simple but sexy. The hair and makeup team were going to transform me into a rock chick, all eyeliner and messy hair, and the set would be plain, making me the focus. There was red a chaise lounge, a microphone stand with microphone, a guitar and black leather armchair resting against the wall, so I guessed they were props that would be used.

While I was being transformed, the stylist came over and showed me some of the outfits I would be wearing. The first was gold sequined mini dress by a designer called Preen, which I loved, she showed me the wet look leggings and the Christian Laboutins I would be wearing with it and I nodded in approval. The next was a red and black plaid playsuit which would be worn with black Manolo platform ankle boots. The third a vintage Guns'n'Roses tee which was similar to one I already owned, and some black skinny jeans, with the same Manolo's. The forth outfit wasn't really worth talking about as it hardly existed. Apparently, to make sure as many people bought the issue as possible, I needed to appeal to all of my demographics, so the fourth outfit was a tight white tank and white lace boy shorts, and that's it. No shoes for that outfit, just the tank and panties, but hey, I'd worn less in a photo shoot before so I wasn't too fussed by it.

After approving the outfits I turned to look in the mirror to inspect my hair and makeup, and I was hardly recognisable, Heidi, the hair and makeup lady had teased individual sections of my hair into loose twists and scrunched it all up into effortless waves, it was messy without me looking like Courtney Love. My make up was striking, staying loyal to my pale complexion, my eyes had heavy black eyeliner on that extended past my eyes, making them look more cat-like, I also had black eye shadow which had a little glitter in also. I'd noticed Heidi using some High Beam, and it make my upper cheek bones sparkle with a beautiful pearl colour, my lips were a matt nude colour because of the heavy eye makeup, and to say I was impressed was an understatement.

"Wow this is amazing!" I said, leaning into the mirror to inspect myself more thoroughly, I turned around in my chair to look at Heidi, "You're amazing, can I take you home?" I joked, as Alice came rushing up to me.

"Oh wow look at you!" She grabbed my hand and pulled me upright, "You look H-O-T!"

"Thanks!" I replied, laughing, before being pulled over to get dressed into the dress.

When I got onto the backdrop I was pleased to see it was a dark gray colour, the guitar was handed to me and I went to stand in front of the camera.

"I'm not really going to give you much direction Bella, I reckon you're pretty well experienced in photo shoots, just give me energy ok?"

I nodded and set to work posing with the guitar, sometimes just holding it, other times pretending to play it. The guitar was taken from me after I'd exhausted its use and the microphone stand was put in front of me. I instantly felt at home with a microphone in front of me and set to work posing like I was on stage, singing into the mic and playing with the stand.

I went to get changed into the playsuit and headed back onto the set, the chaise lounge had been placed in the middle, I lay down on it and posed for a while, letting the photographer get what he needed. I got up from it and then the photographer asked for the mirror ball. I hadn't seen a mirror ball anywhere but the guy who had shown us down here came round from behind a curtain with a huge one and set it down next to me. I continued to pose, leaning back onto it with my foot propped up, but I didn't like that, in another I hitched my leg up onto it, perching my beautiful Manolo ankle boots on it, and heard Alice scream that the pose made my legs look a mile long. I turned my head slightly to laugh at her and another photo was taken of that.

When I went to get changed into the tank and panties I was slightly worried about how they would have me pose, this was Rolling Stone, not Maxim, after all.

I walked back onto the set and was met with the black leather arm chair, the photographer told me to drape myself over it, so I sat on it and turned so that my legs hung over one of the arms and my elbows propped me up on the other. I chopped and changed the pose, from one leg pointed up in the air like a ballet dancer to curling up in the middle and biting my bottom lip.

When the leather chair was taken away I was given free reign, and upon Alice's request I went a little crazy, doing pirouettes and air guitar and on occasion just stopping to laugh at Alice, the photographer seemed to love it all though.

While playing with the huge mirror ball I turned to look at Alice and swear I almost collapsed, her back was turned to me as she was talking to a tall man with coppery, messy hair. I looked a little closer and noticed that it was Edward. His eyes averted her gaze and quickly glanced up at me, obviously shocked that I had noticed him. I stood, staring at him, while the photographer continued to talk to me, but I couldn't hear him. Edward's eyes were locked with my own, and Alice turned on the spot to see me staring over her shoulder at him.

I frowned at him... how could he just be there, and not even announce his arrival or anything, after how he left me? I thought that seeing him again after all this time would be the best thing, but I was just angry at him. Angry at him for leaving me with no explanation, angry at him for kissing me, angry at him for... being him.

I tore my eyes from his and looked at the photographer, "Are we done?" I asked quietly, he nodded and I almost ran off the set and quickly threw on my clothes. As I stood up from pulling my jeans on I felt a presence behind me. I looked at the mirror in front of me and saw him in it standing behind me.

I turned on the spot and stared at him, seemingly unable to speak.

"Bella..." He started, his eyes filled with an emotion I couldn't decipher.

I continued to stare at him, still too angry to form a coherent sentence.

"Bella... I'm sorry..." He looked to me for a response that I was unable to give. "I made a mistake, I shouldn't have-"

"Kissed me?" I spat, hurt that he would even bother saying it to me.

"Don't be stupid Bella..." He frowned at me, anger in his eyes, "I shouldn't have left you, I shouldn't have left... I'm sorry."

"What are you saying?"

"I needed to... Oh for fuck's sake I'm so shit at this... I really like you Bella, I have since the day I walked in on you writing that song. But you... you're this... big thing, and I'm... well I'm nothing, exactly like the magazines said."

I frowned, thinking about the media, I'd steered clear of the internet and magazines since he'd left the tour, so I had no idea what he was talking about, but if he was talking about himself, then that meant that they had spoken about him and me being together. How dare he come to my photo shoot and tell me he liked me now, if he liked me all this time then he could have fucking told me the night I kissed him. I'd laid on the table for him, all he'd had to do was admit it himself, but he didn't. And now he expected me to what? To fall into his arms and live happily ever after. I wasn't going to be taken for a mug. He told me that night that he was a journalist, and that I had proved America right about me being a slut, and I can't just forget that. However much I liked him.

"No Edward." I started, showing my stuff into my bag and grabbing my phone from the side, "Sorry, you're too late now, I gave you your chance and you threw it back at me."

I pushed past him and walked quickly past Alice, whispering a harsh goodbye to her and offering as friendly a goodbye as possible to the team I'd worked with. I left the building and got into a cab, heading for my apartment, knowing that I'd made the right decision.