Greetings and salutations. My apologies for the extended gaps between my postings. I've been dealing with family, work stress, and depression. I'm trying to get back into it, but it might be a bit. That said, thank you to everyone who has PM'd me or left me reviews on my stories. They really help me keep going even if you don't hear back from me. All mistakes are my own, so any crimes against the English Language are my doing. I do my best. Enjoy! - Troll

Chapter 10: After Shock

Jesse watched her father on the computer screen. It had been nearly a day since he had been found and had slept locked in the pipeline while the group tried to decide how to handle the murder of Turtle. Caitlin had been taking Harry food while Jesse kept her distance, watching via the cameras. The father and daughter had managed one conversation where Jesse had told Harry just how she felt. Her disappointment in seeing the fall of her hero, despite knowing what he might have felt while she was missing. Harry had remained oddly silent as Jesse explained what kind of man she'd wanted him to be verses the man he really was. His silence had made it a rather one sided conversation.

"How is he doing?" Caitlin asked, coming in and sitting down next to Jesse. "Has he even moved?" Harry was still huddled against one wall of the cell, tucked up taking as little space as possible. The shoes they had borrowed from Thawne's office were on the opposite side of the cell. After he had finished eating, Harry had pulled the shoes off and thrown them.

"Not really," Jesse admitted. "I think he's asleep. Aside from muttering a few times, he's been quiet." They were silent, watching the man on the screen. "Will his vision return?" Jesse asked softly.

Caitlin opened her mouth to answer but a scream sounded from the screen and both women watched in shock as Harry bolted to his feet, across the cell, and hard into the wall. He hit with a resounding thud, bounced off, and crumpled to the floor. He stayed where he fell, groaning. "I need to check him," Caitlin declared, getting to her feet and racing for the pipeline. Jesse followed more sedately, glancing at the image on the screen as she stood. Her feelings about her father were still in a jumble.

They met Cisco and Barry in the hallway. While they had been working in Cisco's rooms they had the video feed from the pipeline pulled up. The two had heard rather than seen Harry's header into the wall. As the quartet raced down to the pipeline, Caitlin filled them in on what she had seen. "It almost looked like he just woke up terrified," Caitlin exclaimed. They reached the pipeline where Barry had already summoned the cell and was waiting for it to arrive. When it did, Harry hadn't moved.

As Caitlin stepped into the cell, Harry groaned and slowly started to sit up. "Who the hell turned off the lights?" Harry grumbled, putting a hand gingerly to his head. "Lib?" He called the name and then frowned. With a wince he pressed a palm to his temple and huffed. "Turn your brain on man. Libby died." He let out a breath of air and started to get up, unaware that he had an audience. "And the lights aren't out. You're blind and talking to yourself." Trying to stifle a chuckle, Cisco snorted. Harry spun around to face the group, shock sending his eyebrows up. He wavered, dizzy from the move. "Ramon?"

"Yes, Dr. Chambers," Cisco answered, still chuckling some. "Do you always talk to yourself?"

"Only when I want an intelligent conversation," Harry sniped.

"Oh, he burned you," Barry cheered.

"Barry?" Harry's eyes went wide as he realized Ramon wasn't the only one there. "Who else is here?"

"All of us except Joe," Caitlin supplied, giving Cisco a look. "Now, I'm going to help you out of there and take you up to the cortex. I need to examine your head. Put your shoes on."

"My head? The only thing wrong with my head are my eyes," Harry protested. Smiling gently at him, Caitlin retrieved the shoes and pressed them into his hands.

"You ran headlong into the cell wall. Judging by that cut on your forehead, you did so with some speed," Caitlin lectured. "Shoes."

"Fine. Whatever," he grumbled. Holding the shoes against his stomach with one hand, he reached out with the other and used the cell wall as a guide to the floor. Sitting, he paused to figure out which was the left and which was the right shoe. Already, Caitlin knew better than to try to help him. The argument they had at the hospital had been enough. After a few false starts, Harry managed to get his shoes on and tied. As he got to his feet, he grunted in pain and pressed his hand to his left side.

"I'll check your wounds as well," Caitlin informed him as she guided him out of the cell. "Now, can you tell me the last thing you remember?"

"You ordering me to put Thawne's shoes on," Harry grumped. He was struggling with the fact that he was dependent on her as a guide. If his vision didn't return, he would have to work on becoming more familiar with the lab. With each step he took, the shoes squeaked and his breath caught as he hit the floor sooner than he expected.

"Okay, do you remember running into the cell wall?" Caitlin slowed her pace, aware that Harry wasn't comfortable walking yet.

"I remember dreaming," Harry answered. "Stop, please. This is dizzying." His words were enough to bring Caitlin to a halt. Behind them, Barry, Cisco, and Jesse all paused, the girl watching her father wearily. "Thank you." As they stopped, Harry took several slow breaths, leaning forwards and trying to find his balance.

"The toxicology tests showed a number of drugs in your system when you were found. Your body should completely metabolize them all soon but there might be some lingering effects," Caitlin informed him, watching him closely. "Better?" It was obvious that he was struggling, but she wasn't going to just force him to accept her help.

"Yes," Harry answered, standing tall. "Has anyone informed Dr. McGee that I will not be finishing the security upgrade?" As he spoke, Harry squared his shoulders, let out a breath, and started walking once more.

"Joe took care of it," Barry answered.

"Good. Thank him for me the next time you see him," Harry instructed. Barry nodded without thinking, forgetting that the other man couldn't see him. "Snow, can you please tell me when we reach the cortex?"

"Of course," Caitlin agreed softly.

"Mr. Al, I've been thinking of ways to increase your speed," Harry continued. As he spoke, he also intently focused on the way everything sounded, trying to build a map in his mind.

"Yeah, I have too. What about a drug?" Barry suggested. "Something that could give me a temporary boost like nitrous does for cars." He'd been helping Wally with a project when the idea had hit.

"I've made a number of improvements to a drug Harry and I came up with, but it has the nasty side effect of killing you," Caitlin explained. "We're here," she informed Harry. "I'm going to guide you to the exam bed. I know you're body is basically one giant injury, so I'll let you get comfortable before I begin the exam."

"Wait, you guys came up with a drug that can make a speedster faster?" Anger raised Barry's voice making Harry wince.

"Volume please, Mr. Allen," Harry requested as he grasped the side of the bed, one hand covering the ear closest to Barry. Eyes narrowing, Caitlin noted the stiffness in Harry's movements.

"Yes, we came up with a drug. It can increase the speed of a speedster as well as temporarily bestow speed upon a normal person, but it causes severe cellular degradation which will result in death," Caitlin lectured. "Harry, go ahead and strip down please. I know the hospital treated all your injuries, but I would like to have a proper look at them." She shot Barry a glare, clearly indicating that the discussion was over.

"Just minor wounds," Harry responded, tightening his grip on the bed. When he had first come back from the hospital, Harry had let Snow check his eyes but nothing else. She didn't need to see what Eiling had done to him. From what she had told him, he knew Snow had read the hospital report.

"I understand that, but as your doctor, I need to see them with my own eyes," Caitlin informed him. Grumbling under his breath, Harry started to pull his shirt off, pausing to turn his blind gaze at the others.

"Fine, but can I have some privacy?" If he'd been able, he would have glowered at Cisco and Barry. Trying not to think about his silent daughter, he listened to the shuffling of feet as Caitlin gave the other three a look, eyebrow raised.

"Yeah, sorry Dr. Chambers," Cisco muttered. Together, he, Barry, and Jesse shuffled out of the room. To Barry's amusement, Cisco went to the computers and pulled up the room's camera. Shrugging, Cisco sat. "What? I think we should know what Eiling did to him," Cisco whispered. Giving his friend a look, Barry turned off the feed.

"We can ask later," Barry responded softly. For her part, Jesse gazed in through the windows, watching her father shed clothing.

In the exam room, Caitlin watched as Harry removed his undershirt. He stood, awkwardly for a moment. "Trousers as well," Caitlin nagged. Before he could protest, she continued, "I know you have burns on your legs and pelvis." She could tell by the frown Harry wore that he wasn't happy with her demands. "Johnny," she began softly, aware the others were just a room over. "Please. I want to help you, but you have to let me see and know what was done to you." Reaching out, she gently touched a bruise-free spot on his shoulder. He pulled away and then swayed back towards her with a sigh.

"Fine," his shoulders sagged as he breathed the single word. Letting his eyes close tiredly, he undid his belt, then the button and zipper. As his trousers slid to the floor, Caitlin studied the bruises, cuts, and burns that littered his body. Clearly, Eiling had been doing more than just trying to make the scientist use super healing. Caitlin hadn't pushed him for information the other day. Seeing the extensive injuries, she was both happy and sad she hadn't. There was a good chance Harry wasn't dealing with it yet. Pushing him too early might just push him away. "What did my doppelganger do to Eiling?" Harry asked softly, well aware that Caitlin was staring at his wounds. He stood awkwardly by the bed, forcing his hands to stay down rather than try to cover his naked chest. Snow had said she needed a good look at what was done to him.

"Uh," Caitlin blinked and shook herself. "Thawne gave Eiling to Grodd," she managed to answer. They hadn't really talked when Harry had first returned. He hadn't been willing to say much. Now, with a night between himself and the trauma, Harry was aware that he was willing to open up.

"I didn't think it was just about speedster healing," Harry mused softly to himself. With a defeated sigh, he groped around on the bed, working his way onto it. As he settled down with his legs hanging off the side, he tried to figure out where exactly Caitlin stood. "Snow, say something please. I hate this feeling." His voice was a soft growl and if she listened closely, Caitlin could hear his fear.

"Sorry," Caitlin began. "So, has there been any improvement with your eyes?" As she spoke, she stepped up, letting one hand rest on his bicep so he'd know where she was.

"Nope. Still all black," Harry replied almost cheerfully.

"Look straight towards my voice," Caitlin ordered, standing in front of him, penlight ready. Doing his best to follow her orders, Harry fought to control his breathing as she checked his pupils.

"Has Jesse said anything to you?" Harry asked softly, opting to distract himself from his physical discomforts. Normally he didn't like discussing his private life with others, but he wasn't feeling much like his usual self. Far from it in fact. Emotions were rampaging through him on a wave of pain and memories. He needed to find an anchor. Maybe Snow could help.

"No. Give her time," Caitlin ordered. "Finding out her father killed somebody in an attempt to save her life is a big reveal." A single, almost bark of a laugh escaped his lips and Harry turned his head away.

"I get her back only to lose her again," he muttered to himself.

"I'd like you to try wearing sunglasses for a while," Caitlin began, ignoring his pity party. She wasn't sure what to do for his mental health, so she decided to focus on his physical health. "I had Cisco pick up some I special ordered when we brought you home yesterday."

"Filter out any potentially harmful rays and protect my eyes to help promote healing?" Harry guessed. A bitter part of him wondered why bother, but he pushed it aside.

"Yes," Caitlin couldn't keep the surprise from her voice or face.

"You shouldn't sound so shocked. I'm not a medical doctor but I do know a thing or two," Harry chided her. "I suppose you'll also be wanting to drag me off to some specialist if there continues to be no improvement tomorrow," he added, his voice layered with irritation.

"Harry, I just want you to get better," Caitlin lectured him. "I know you're hurting right now, but I'm here to help. Lashing out at me doesn't do you any good." She was giving the speech prematurely, but she could see his anger and frustration building.

Clenching his fists tightly, Harry let out a huff of air. Pressing his lips firmly together, he turned his head away from her. "Fine," he eventually responded tightly. "Whatever you think is best, Doctor Snow." He fell silent, and Caitlin started going over his injuries. He was littered with them.

"It would help if you could tell me what he used on you," Caitlin said, frowning at shallow cuts on his chest.

"For some of the cuts he used a Swiss Army knife, but I think he used each blade at least once. Other cuts are from his Army knife, combat blade. The burns are from cigars and various chemicals," Harry answered coldly. "My eyes was some random chemical he grabbed from the table. I honestly can't say really. By the time the Colonel came to my rescue, I was in a great deal of pain and pretty doped up." He managed a shrug, ignoring the pain it brought. "I suppose that in a way, I deserved all of it. Thawne is responsible for the metas here and I'm responsible for the metas on my Earth, including Zoom." His right hand drifted up towards his eyes but then dropped into his lap. "A darkness of my own making. Just as I have failed to be the father Jesse needed."

"These wounds will heal," Caitlin said softly. "A few will scar. Just use them as reminders of the man you want to be for your daughter. Reminders that it hurts to mess up, but you can still make a difference."

"Can I?" There was a bitterness to his voice. "I abandoned my Earth to a monster I created. My actions have chased my daughter mentally and emotionally away from me. I know she's standing in the other room, but she's only here physically. If I hadn't been taken by Eiling, do you think she would have stayed?"

Glancing through the glass at Jesse, who was silently shifting her weight from foot to foot, Caitlin smiled sadly at the young lady. "I know she just got a taste of what you went through for four months."

"Just proves how different we are under pressure," Harry sighed. "Can I get dressed now?" Caitlin was finishing looking him over, saddened by the amount of damage his body had taken.

"Yes, but I'm going to schedule you with a specialist for your eyes. You might also benefit from speaking with a psychologist or psychiatrist," Caitlin lectured him, stepping back to grab the glasses she'd had Cisco order for her. "Here are your glasses."

"I'm fine. I don't need to talk to anyone. As for my eyes; I'll do whatever you deem is necessary," a defeated but still fighting Harry told her. "Thank you. For the glasses." Blindly he groped in front of himself so Caitlin moved the glasses to where he'd find them. "Sorry," he apologized when their hands smacked together. Taking the frames, he carefully put them on, cocking his head to one side. "Good?"

"Perfect," Caitlin assured him. "That should help protect them from any harmful rays while they heal. The skin that the chemical damaged is healing well enough that I don't think we need to cover it. Go ahead and get dressed. Tonight I'll need to redress some of your wounds."

"Thank you, Snow," he said softly. Caitlin smiled and nodded, remembered that he couldn't see her, and patted his hand.

"No problem, Harry," she assured him. "I'm going to talk to the others while you get dressed." Harry nodded and Caitlin left the room. As she passed Jesse, she let her hand fall on the young woman's shoulder. "You need to talk to him. Really talk to him," Caitlin suggested softly.

"I'm not ready," Jesse countered. "He wasn't even listening to me earlier."

"Maybe, but I think he was." With a sad smile, Caitlin turned to the rest of the group. Joe had arrived while she had been checking Harry. "We need to decide his punishment." Her gaze travelled around the room as she leaned against the desk.

"Punishment? Caitlin, if he wasn't the doppleganger of a dead confessed killer who murdered a meta we had illegally incarcerated, he'd be in jail," Joe pointed out. "The way you're talking it sounds like he just needs to be grounded or something."

"I think we can all agree that it was extenuating circumstances," Cisco pointed out.

"We can't keep him locked up downstairs in the pipeline for the rest of his life," Barry argued. He tried not to let his gaze wander towards the room where Harry was slowly getting dressed. "He is part of this team and we need him."

"How much good can he do while he's blind?" Joe demanded. Between Eobard and Harry, Joe found it hard to trust the scientist, even though Harry wasn't Eobard.

"You know there's special computers that a blind person can use. You'd be amazed what a person with a handicap can accomplish," a female voice said from the door. As one the group turned to see Felicity Smoak leaning against the frame. "I can set one up for you while I'm here," she offered, pushing off the wall and entering the room. "But who's blind?" She looked around the group, worried about them all.

"Harry," Barry answered, jerking a thumb towards the room with the man.

"Who are you?" Jesse asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Oh, gosh, sorry," Barry babbled. "Right, Felicity Smoak, this is Jesse Wells, I mean Chambers," Barry fumbled through the introductions. "Jesse, this is our friend Felicity Smoak." The two women started to shake hands but Felicity paused.

"Wait, Wells? Like Harrison Wells?" Felicity couldn't hide her surprise.

"Chambers. As in Johnny Chambers," countered Jesse. Felicity's brow furrowed but she then she remembered what Diggle had told her about helping the Earth 2 Wells family.

"Uhm, Felicity, what can we do for you?" Caitlin asked, frowning towards the exam room as a clatter sounded followed by Harry swearing.

"Oh, we were hoping for some help," Felicity supplied.

"Who is we?" Harry asked carefully entering the room. Before anyone could answer, somebody screamed loudly. "What the hell?" Harry hadn't been expecting a scream, let alone the torrent of speech that followed it.

"Oh my God you're Harrison Wells. I thought you were dead? Wait, didn't you confess to killing someone?" The words tumbled out of the newcomer's mouth so fast that only Barry and Felicity seemed to get them all.

"Who are you?" Cisco asked, looking annoyed. "And how did you two get past my security?"

"You have security?" The strange man asked, looking surprised.

"I bypassed it," Felicity supplied. "I thought I told you to wait in the car. Nevermind. Everybody, this is Curtis. Curtis, this is everybody."

"For the record, I'm not Harrison Wells. My name is John Chambers. Dr. Wells and I were apparently monozygotic twins. Can somebody please help me back?" Harry's words were dry, devoid of emotion. He hated asking for help, but saw no point standing around while Barry and the others talked amongst themselves. It seemed he was mostly ignored.

"I'm not a dog," Curtis shot back at Felicity, his gaze rapidly flitting around the room. He desperately wanted to see and touch all the technology. "You can't just tell me to wait in the car and expect me to obey."

"Can somebody please take me back to my room?" Harry requested again. He didn't know what was going on but the high speed speech of the other man was giving him a headache.

"Johnny and his daughter came to us for help but really they've helped us more," Caitlin explained as she stepped forwards. "I'm going to put your hand on my elbow, Johnny."

"Thank you, Snow." His voice sounded tired. After Caitlin guided his hand, he clung to her elbow, hoping she wouldn't make him wait too long before taking him back to the cell.

"Neat. I'm Felicity Smoak, head of Palmer Technologies. This is Curtis Holt, one of my employees," Felicity said, motioning at the hyperactive man who had followed her inside.

"Nice to meet you both," Harry said with an inclination of his head. "I'm sorry. I've recently lost my eyesight and am frustrated by my inability to contribute. My apologies if I'm a bit grumpy." Cisco's face filled with surprise. Harry admitting that he was grumpy and apologizing for it? Hell must have frozen over.

"No problem. Though, Felicity is right. There are computers and programs that you can use to help you work," Curtis supplied. "My husband actually had me tweak one for a client of his. He's a physical therapist. My husband, not his client. His client was blind." Before Curtis could continue, Harry held his free hand up.

"Thank you, Mr. Holt. I appreciate your enthusiasm. If you have time once you have finished whatever brought you here, I would welcome any help you could give me in adapting to my loss," Harry managed. He wanted to grump and growl, but Holt clearly had no idea what was going on, so there was no point. Besides, Ramon was probably beside himself with annoyance at Harry not acting normal. It amused the older scientist to imagine the look on the engineer's face. Just because he couldn't see didn't mean he wasn't going to annoy Ramon.

"Sure, not a problem," Curtis agreed.

"I'll be right back. I'm just going to help Johnny get settled back into his room," Caitlin explained. Nodding at Curtis and smiling at Felicity, she then led the blind scientist out of the room.

Okay, I know that folks have some questions/issues. First, I'll address the SEAL aspect of Harry's life later. Second, I made him a blind for a reason. That should become clear in a few chapters. Third, thank you to everyone who has been waiting patiently and putting up with my inconsistent postings. My apologies. I'm doing my best. My vampiric zombie beta has been available for fobbing ideas back and forth with, but unable to do editing. That said, big thanks to DoctorHarrisonWells for putting up with my random inane messages. You rock. - Troll