"So. Er. Why are there cameras on the table?"
"Found them around the flat."
"Mycroft's?"
"Probably." As John rested his head on the taller man's shoulder, there was a loud knock at the door and his phone buzzed. Twice.
John let us in. -G.L.
Please come to your door. -MH
He smirked at the set of them. It wouldn't surprise him much if they were together. They did seem to have a fondness for each other. He'd seen them getting coffee together a few times. And once out walking somewhere together. They could be friends. He doubted it.
"Who is it?"
"Lestrade, and your brother."
"Oh dear."
"Go wash your face, you look terrible." Sherlock got up and went off to clean his face as John descended the stairs again and opened the door to Greg and Mycroft, whose hands sped apart as his eyes darted down.
"Donovan owes me twenty. Come in."
"Where is he?" The older Holmes demanded as they climbed the stairs.
"Washing up. He ate." The tap was running in the washroom. Small splashing sounds. Then it went off and a few moments later the door opened. The ends of his hair were wet.
"Anderson will be furious," Greg said after a few moments of awkward silence. This set of a bout of laughter from three of them and a smirk from Mycroft.
"Where have you been, Sherlock?"
"There was a sniper. Sebastian Moran. I've taken care of him." They chattered away, well, Mycroft and Greg did, and John sat down again. Where he'd been when Evangeline fell asleep the night before.
They're both there, aren't they. -Ev
How did you get my number? -JW
I checked your phone while you were asleep. Sorry. -Ev
It's fine. Sherlock, Mycroft, and Detective Inspector Greg Lestrade. And Mrs Hudson and I. -JW
I know Lestrade. Kind of. -Ev
You do? -JW
Yes. Coworker of a friend. -Ev
Really. -JW
Kind of. I've met him. He wouldn't recognize me though. Is my green ribbon still on your coffee table? -Ev
He looked, and sure enough, it was. He grabbed it and slipped it into his pocket quickly, hoping no one had seen. Of course, Sherlock would probably have noticed.
It was. Now it's in my pocket. I owe you an apology. -JW
For pretending to accept that he was alive, just to pacify me? It's fine. I barely believed it myself. -Ev
"John, who're you texting? New girlfriend?" He hadn't expected the Detective Inspector to be the first to notice that his eyes were glued to his phone. Then again, Greg was probably smarter than the average man, wasn't he? He was the Detective Inspector, that had to take some smarts. Being placed next to Sherlock so often must be what made him seem mediocre, John reasoned.
"Uh, no. A friend."
"You have friends?"
"A few."
"Who text?"
"One." This elicited a chuckle from Lestrade. Mycroft was pestering Sherlock still, so he didn't know how he had reacted.
"Come on, it's a girlfriend, isn't it."
"No, I assure you she is not my girlfriend."
"It is a she."
"Yes."
"Molly?"
"Molly doesn't text me."
"A... new friend?" John considered lying, but Sherlock might notice that now that the Holmes brothers were paying attention to their conversation instead of bickering.
"Yeah, met her about a week ago."
"How did you meet?"
"Er, not sure I should say." A bridge. Archway bridge. She was going to jump off.
Yeah, for that. -JW
You disappeared. -Ev
Being pestered about who this mysterious new female friend who is not my girlfriend who I am texting is. -JW
That was quite the sentence. -Ev
I guess, yeah. -JW
Make sure he doesn't get your phone. Either of them. Erase these before 9 tonight. -Ev
Why 9? -JW
That's when Mycroft usually searches people's phones. -Ev
Really? Why? -JW
Don't know. I'll figure it out if we ever get on speaking terms again. -Ev
"John, really. How did you meet her? Was it a date?"
"I bumped into her while wandering around Archway." True enough.
"And you really shouldn't say that? Come on, that's nothing." Sherlock's expression changed slightly on hearing this information. Hopefully he'd come to a wrong conclusion, a plausible one, so he'd dismiss it as 'boring' and stop thinking about it.
Instead of realizing that there had been a suicide attempt that night.
Instead of realizing it'd been her suicide attempt. If it was him, it'd be easily explained away- lonliness, sadness, wanting to be like Sherlock, et cetera- but why he'd make friends with a suicidal girl who he'd just met wouldn't be quite as easy.
After all, those scars on her arm said she'd tried it before, quite a while ago.

AN: I know this is OOC. I'm not 100% sure how to fix it, and my girlfriend who sometimes reads things for me and helps me with them unfortunately doesn't know either. So uh. Yeah. That.