A/N: Song inspiration for this chapter is All I Want - A Day to Remember

Chapter Ten

All I Want

The water was cold as I could get it as I splashed it onto my face. The dude in the mirror looked damn tired and that would be because I was. It was now the middle of whatever night as I'd lost track of whatever time and I just wanted sleep – maybe a greasy burger or something. But here I was in a Preventer Field Office bathroom, feeling a slight shake in my hands and maybe a little increased heart rate. Huh. I'd not been under a ton of stress since the pacemaker and while most of the time I forgot about it, yeah, apart from the big ass scar, now I felt the thudding of my heartbeat so fucking loud in my ears.

The bathroom door opened and Wufei walked in looking less shaken. Of course, he'd not been interrogated for the last two fucking hours.

"I feel like I'm the bad guy here," I said the anger bubbling just under the surface.

"It's protocol."

"Protocol? What the fuck is protocol about this? Dead body with my tattoo on his chest means that I'm getting my ass handed to me by fucking Merquise!"

Wufei sighed and leaned against the door, blocking anyone from coming in as he guessed I was gonna go on some angry tirade but fuck, I was too tired for that. I'd been bundled back to the Field Office in the back of a black town car and then brought into one of the lower floor interrogation rooms. I stripped my shirt off so that they could take a picture of every damn tattoo, taking each one in minute detail, my arm out for what seemed like fucking forever. I complied as Zechs stood with 'Fei and when I got damn annoyed after being asked to move my arm a little or turn or whatever for the hundredth fucking time, I could almost sense Wufei tense across the room and give me that look that I'd come to be so damn fond of – that one where it looks like I'm giving him a headache.

Then we'd discussed who knew I had the tattoo which I rolled my eyes during that line of questioning. Merquise pulled out an "Agent Maxwell" and I told him. Told him about the small tattoo shop in Berlin, about the sleeve being designed in consultation with the artist – how it wasn't something I'd just walked into the place and seen some flash for and gone "that one" or whatever. I didn't elaborate – didn't say why it was angel wings and I saw his cold blue eyes take it in coolly when I was stood in my tank. I was surprised he didn't make some kinda Heero related comment. Maybe he knew all my professionalism would vanish if he did and I might punch him in his smug face. I can be predictably unpredictable when aggravated. What can I say?

The people who knew about the tattoo I guess were pretty limited – I mean, hey, I may be a little scrawny but I have no body image issues but few people got to see me naked. Though there were nurses, doctors, people like that and when I'd worked at the garage, I had worked in tanks and shit but it wasn't like I showed off my ink. Yeah, it was there but it wasn't some damn big statement or nothing. And now I started to question every person who could've potentially seen it.

The tattoo was only the half of it. Sitting at a metal table opposite Zechs, Wufei leaning against the door, he asked the question that I knew he'd damn well ask – did I know anyone with a grudge against me? I downright laughed in his face. I'd killed people in a big ass machine of death. I'd worked undercover. I'm sure there were a list of people who held a grudge and wanted me dead but I looked over at Wufei then, saying the name out loud that was on my mind.

One person in the world had the biggest fucking grudge with me.

"Roth."

Zechs had looked across at me with steepled fingers and there was nothing else I wanted to elaborate on – he had access, he could find all the shit he needed and that was when I was done – which led me to being here in the bathroom, pissy and tired.

"He's doing what he has to, Maxwell," Wufei said as I'd not spoken and I shot him a calculating look.

"Yeah and he fucking wants me off this, right?"

He looked briefly down at the tiled floor and I found my hands balling into fists as that confirmed it. I was tempted to level a punch at a stall door or something as it had been a weird and frustrating day and I wasn't sure the last time I'd slept and if I wasn't so... so fucking drained I'd be more pissed but instead I saw a slight awkwardness in his stance.

"You agree?"

"If this has something to do with Roth, it's too personal. Perspective is needed."

It was a rational statement and I hated him for it. "Like shit am I walking away! You didn't meet the bastard – he didn't inject you with whatever shit and try to fucking kill you."

His answer was pretty damn cold. "I didn't kill his daughter."

The blow was low and I was tempted to lash out then but instead I turned back to the water I'd left running and turned the faucet off as the memories made me feel sick. Yeah, technically I hadn't pulled the trigger but I was there and I'd seen her body crumple. Heero had shot Zee, or Zadie Roth as she was actually known, but he wouldn't have done it if she hadn't been threatening me. Never wanted him to do it. Didn't want Heero to have to kill a damn kid even though it was my life or hers.

I shut my eyes tight – remembering the barrel of a gun and the feeling of a bullet entering my body, my heart beating way too damn fast. And now my heart rate was erratic again. I needed to calm the fuck down.

"And that's why I gotta be a part of it," I said, my tone pretty damn low as I opened my eyes and levelled my stare at him. "I don't give a damn what blondie thinks – I'll work this case with or without a badge and he can fucking watch me."

"Duo," he said and I cocked my head at the use of my name – it was a rare thing and I admit, it weirded me out little. "If this is personal then Zechs is only doing what any commander would do."

"Thanks 'Fei," I said the sarcasm dripping from my voice. "Way to back up me over that self-righteous prick – he was a goddamn enemy, remember?"

"He's our commanding officer and the war is over, Maxwell."

My eyes narrowed then as I studied his face and I figured it out. I knew people's cues – it's what had kept me alive my entire fucking life. I knew on the streets who was an enemy, who was a friend, which people to avoid and which to talk to. It was my life and had always been my life and it was what made me an exceptional undercover agent. The only person I'd never truly been able to read was Heero and I suppose I liked that. He was the kinda guy that could still blindside me, as evidenced by the ring on my finger. Always the quiet ones and all.

And Wufei was tricky, a little, as he kept everything so damn tight to his chest but I had gotten cues earlier. Little cues. When I'd talked about Zechs at the underground station and then I realised I was so damn focused on being a pissy bitch in the interrogation room that at the time I didn't process how they'd stood pretty close together. Abnormally close together.

There's this thing – like I'd always noticed it with Quat and Tro – that people who've been together – had sex, fucked, made love, whatever you want to call it – have this thing that they mirror each other or something – that they have this comfort thing with each other and it's noticeable.

And then I knew why he was defending Zechs – not taking my side. Yeah, there was an element of sense to what Wufei was saying. There was the fact that I probably need perspective. I was personally involved and shit but now I got it.

I knew it was an asshole move. But I was tired and hungry and a million other things.

"How long have you been fucking him?"

His face only twitched but it was enough. He was trying to be composed and I realised that maybe, just maybe, I should have worded it less harshly. Should've said it without my usually flare for being crude but it was all I needed.

He glared, cold, and I deserved it. "It's none of your concern."

I coulda gloated that I figured it out – made a comment about him finally getting laid or whatever – but instead all I could do was meet his stare until I realised I'd been a dick. He could sleep with whoever, free country and all, but maybe there was some wounding to my own ego – totally not in love with me anymore. Or over me. Even if him and Zechsy baby were just doing the nasty and it meant nothing.

Could I blame him as Zechs had been an enemy? Hell no. Though like hell did I really want to imagine them together – that thought fucked with my head as it still didn't seem quite right. The war may be over but he had still tried to drop a colony on the earth. Zechs was hardly a stand up guy.

I held out my hands in an apology and dropped my gaze – giving in to the staring contest. "Look, I'm sorry man – I'm tired, I've not eaten. We allowed to blow this joint?"

"You were never under arrest."

He opened the door at that and walked out. I took one last look at the dead man walking in the mirror.

"Yeah but it damn well felt like it," I muttered under my breath.

If the drive back to the hotel – Preventer escort and all – had been awkward, it had nothing on being confined in a small space with Wufei. I almost made a comment about him going to stay with his boyfriend and realised it would be the biggest douche move I could make. I stop myself sometimes and fuck, Wufei didn't deserve me being a jerk to him. He never had.

I showered and took my cell to the bathroom to make a call – purposefully out of the way. I left the water running – hey, I wasn't fucking paying for it – and dialled, using the sound of the shower to mask our conversation. I didn't think 'Fei would listen in on purpose but then the hotel room was small, the walls thin, and I wanted to talk to 'Ro alone. Woulda gone down to reception if I wasn't so damn tired.

The time was far too late or early depending on perspective and I figured it was five a.m. in Sanc but I called anyway – the phone only ringing for a few seconds before it connected, the image taking a moment to be clear and I could see Heero was holding it while lying against a pillow on his side, his hair mussed and his eyes blinking away any sleepiness.

"Hey. Sorry for waking you."

He grunted and moved his position to sitting, the phone camera giving an angle of his naked chest as he sat up.

"You heard?"

"What do you think?" he shot back, a slight arch in his eyebrow visible on the small screen.

"I think you'll be tracking everything I'm doing."

He gave a little look in answer that said it all. I paused, looked at him, at the fact he was still fucking gorgeous on a tiny screen, even when he'd been woken up abruptly and hell – me? I looked like shit. He was far too good for me in so many ways.

"You think it's Roth?" I asked, the name harsh on my tongue.

"I don't think there's enough evidence. Don't jump to conclusions."

"You sound like 'Fei..." I said and I saw a small twitch of his mouth that no one else would've picked up but I let it slide. Hey, after all, I could reassure 'Ro that he wasn't after my ass anymore. "But you didn't see it 'Ro, it was mine, and no one knows this shit."

"Other people have seen it."

"Not that many."

"It doesn't have to be him."

"Yeah but who else would go outta their way to get someone tattooed and then kill 'em? Or tattoo a corpse? I mean, how the fuck does that one work? Who else hates my ass that much?"

"Duo," he said my name so damn softly sometimes that it made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end or something and I just didn't want to be here.

All I wanted was him, here, and I was hating the distance between us, hating that I was in London and he was in Sanc. I itched to touch his hair, to run my fingers through it as I did a lot when he was half asleep or when we lay in bed together on scratchy sheets.

Shit, I was getting all sappy and sentimental but I was tired and I blamed that rather than anything else.

"If it's him, it is. Now go get some sleep," he said, his tone a little teasing.

"Hey, you know I never take orders, babe."

"I know."

I saw his smile, that little one that was only reserved for me. "Since we're on the phone and all… you know we could…"

The rest of the sentence didn't need to leave my lips as I did a suggestive waggle of my eyebrows, which was enough. I wasn't actually a hundred percent serious being that Wufei was in the next room but he snorted and did that little eye roll thing that I kinda adored.

"When you're in a small hotel room with Chang?"

I shook my head and let a little snort out. "Showers on and plus he's screwing Merquise so you know, no longer fixated on my ass, though does seem like he has a hair fetish..."

My voice trailed off and Heero looked thoughtful at that information, as though he was trying to figure out if it was useful. He seemed to dismiss it – or maybe he just didn't care who Wufei did as long as he wasn't still interested in me. Fuck knows. As I said I can read a million people's cues – but 'Ro was still something else.

"You should sleep."

His concern for my welfare was cute and all but I wanted to fall asleep listening to his voice. Impossible unless I decided to sleep on the cold hard tile – which actually was kinda tempting.

"Yeah – I'm going. Just needed to speak to you."

"I have work in an hour."

I knew what he meant. It was a "get off the damn phone and let me get a little more sleep" or go to the gym or shower or whatever. And it was kinda endearing that he didn't just say "shut up, Duo" or hang up on my rambling ass. He'd grown as a person I guess. Patience for me. Shit, me, his fiancé. Hated that fucking word.

"Work," I mused and then added, joking, "hell – don't do anything I wouldn't do."

Even through the tiny screen and the pixels, I almost felt like I could feel the heat of his glare. It looked kinda cute miniaturised and it looked less angry and more petulant.

"And that would rule out what, exactly?"

I pouted my best puppy-dog pout. "Remember, I'm on my best behaviour and all. No trouble from me."

There was a little sigh that left his lips and I knew I should disconnect but I was being a little needy or whatever. Still blaming the bone-weariness.

"Go to sleep," he said and I finally admitted I sure as hell needed it and I needed it now.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm going," I replied and then I smiled that smile that only he got – the genuine one not disguised by any of my bullshit. "Take care of yourself, babe."

He didn't answer, only quirked his lips a little and disconnected the call. I didn't mind him hanging up on me or whatever as it wasn't like that – we weren't those people who had endless talks about our feelings or whatever so our goodbyes were never gonna be intense.

But I felt better having talked to him, my heart beating at a normal rate as I turned off the shower and exited the bathroom, making my way to the bed, only nodding my head to indicate Wufei could use the bathroom. I slipped into boxers, throwing the towel wherever and slid into cool sheets and while all I wanted was Heero, him in the bed with me, his hand with my hair wrapped around it, I was too tired to stay awake, falling asleep dreaming about a corpse with angel wings sprawled on the floor.