*Warning!* Suicidal thoughts! Sorta. Ish. And mentions of awful writing and laziness when it comes to responsibility!

Continue at your own risk. The dog bites!

Cas POV

My breath hitched as I learned the news of Mandy.

A week after I left there was a break in, nothing was damaged or stolen, well except Mandy of course. At first they thought she had just run away, but they had found a smear of blood on the wall leading to the window.

They followed the path and found the grass made an imprint of a body as if it had been dragged. Other than that there was no trace.

The police checked everywhere, the neighbors were interrogated, and the surveillance cameras where watched until there were stars in their eyes.

Nothing.

I thought I would feel something, boiling anger, pure loathing for her captors, or even a twinge of sadness. But no, I was left with this awful void, that made me feel like I was floating and any physical harm that could come to me would not be able to overcome the hollowness in my bones.

It has deadened me and I am petrified.

Ellen explains to me that she works for the FBI and that they were doing all they could to find her. She went on telling me about all the specifics before patting my shoulder and handing me a business card.

I said nothing throughout the whole interaction, and I guess she's used to a one sided conversation.

How sad.

"Call this number if you have anything that could help, or if you just need to talk." She gave me a small sad smile, and presumably made her way to Dean's room.

I didn't move, couldn't move. I had no control over my limbs anymore. So I just sat around like a vegetable, letting my mind rot with all the terrible thoughts.

I really had nothing now.

What is the point of getting up when your only reason was quite literally ripped from you?

Well that's exactly it little Cassy! There is no reason anymore!

My mind raced through all the people who I knew.

Grandma. Dead.

Mom. Left when I was three.

Dad. Drunk bastard who I only saw on weekends, when his dead end job left him needing a punching bag.

Aunt Renee. If she loved me as much as she said then why didn't she save me from my father as soon as she noticed the bottles?

Mandy. Kidnapped and announced dead.

All the people in my life either left me, or didn't give a shit about me.

So what was really stopping me from leaving and joining Mandy? Was there anything I'm missing?

No Cas, there isn't a single thing.

Cas? Cas. Where have I heard that?

Dean.

Sam.

That's what's keeping me. I need to help Sam and Dean. I have to help a family, and keep them from having to understand this emptiness.

That's my purpose now isn't it. Not exactly the purpose I wanted. Not exactly the purpose anyone wants.

Can I do it?

Sam POV

I was hesitant to leave Castiel behind with Ellen. I've only known her for what? Twenty minutes? Not even that long.

I kept lingering behind, looking back at him before Dr. Al gave out a dissatisfied grunt and I sped up. We've been walking for an estimated ten minutes and I still haven't recognized a single thing.

That's to say if there was a lot to distinguish between the seemingly endless sterile white walls. We passed door after door and still he hasn't shown a sign of stopping.

Damn, this place is bigger than it looks!

There seemed to be no real order of the rooms as we just passed room 193 and 429. Great.

Now if I get lost there will be no getting found. No wonder Cas got all turned around.

Finally, finally, we reached his door, room 3751.

The doctor pulls open the door and I turn my head to see my brothers' pale and gaunt face. I walk over to his bedside and pull a chair up.

"Now about your brothers' recovery I didn't tell you everything you needed to know." Dr. Al informed me.

"What do mean?"

"I mean you're gonna have to make a deal with me." He said his eyes glazing over, turning a sickening yellow, and his voice now had a malicious edge to it.

Startled, I yelped and knocked over the plastic chair.

"Oh Sammy! Don't act so surprised!" He sneered. "You knew there was no way he would wake up! That would take a miracle!"

"Wha- what are you?"

"Why I'm a demon, silly boy!" He barked out a laugh, then his eyes went cold again. "And you can call me Azazel."

The name for some strange reason, sent shivers down my spine, as if I'd heard it before. There's no way I could have.

"What makes you think I'd make a deal with a demon?"

"To save your precious Dean of course! You'd do anything for him wouldn't you?" He leaned in close, eyes narrowing. "Even something like selling your soul?"

I gulped and he laughed. It was awful, like nails on chalk board, with no humor in laced in what-so-ever.

"How about this. I'll tell you the technicalities and you can sleep on it, yeah?" He proposed. Before I could even nod he started up again.

"I'll patch you brother up, he won't have a problem. Walking fine, no amnesia, the whole nine yards!" He spread out his arms and continued. "And you'll get one whole happy year with your brother, before you have to hold up your end of the bargain."

"I'll leave you to talk it out with brother dearest. Until then!" He sighed, closing the door with a harsh bang.

I put my attention on Dean once again. Would this be for the better? Could I really save Dean?

I thought that yes, this was the best and only option.

Dundunduuuuun!

He's evil! And Mandy's dead! Waaah?! What's really going on here? This chapter's title song is by Linkin Park! Yeah! I don't think I'll get another chapter up by Christmas or New Year so I shall say it in advanced!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I'll see you in 2015(Holy shit!)

Ta ta!