A/N: I don't know whether to be delighted I have such passionate readers or fearful for my life. Thank you all for the AMAZING reviews; I'm sorry I have fell behind with replies.
Thank you to my wonderful friend worrywart for her invaluable input.
I own nothing.
I'm sure you are all aware of the purging, I'm not sure how this is going to change my story, hence my late upload. I'm working out a plan and then you guys will be the first to know!
Last Chapter:
He knew what he should do, what he wanted to do, what he needed to do…
X~X
"Hermione…I-," Severus rumbled in an uncharacteristically nervous tone.
"Yes?" Hermione asked breathlessly as she willed her hazy mind not to throw herself into his arms.
They stared at one another, both breathing heavily. The air was thick with tension and Severus' hand still lingered uncertainly on Hermione's face.
"I owe you an apology," Severus murmured sincerely as he let his hand fall from her upturned face and cast his eyes towards the floor.
Moments passed, and Hermione had yet to speak. She was desperately willing her mind to come up with something, anything, remotely appropriate, but the thoughts running through her mind were anything but appropriate.
I don't want you to apologise to me, I want you to touch me.
Apology accepted now shut up and kiss me.
You had better be apologising for the passionate attack you are about to launch on my extremely willing body.
Her silence eventually caused him to raise his eyes back to her face, attempting to gauge her reaction. When their eyes met, Hermione, in a fit of nervousness, burst out laughing. Severus watched incredulously as she clutched her stomach in mirth and covered her eyes with her hand.
"Sorry…it's just, well it's not what I expected," Hermione offered as she sobered slightly.
"Quite," he drawled with a roll of his eyes. "I can assure you I rarely apologise in life so I suggest you enjoy it.
"Oh I intend to," Hermione answered with a smile. Severus responded with a subtle curl of his own mouth before his expression turned serious once more. He was still standing directly in front of Hermione, and although there was still a certain degree of tension in the air, the atmosphere was decidedly less awkward.
"I should never have given you the impression that I was unconcerned with your welfare. I am wholly concerned with your welfare and your happiness," he admitted passionately whilst looking into her eyes. "Against all logical reason and common sense, you have come to mean more to me than…well, than you should," he scoffed at his own words self-deprecatingly.
The sound of Hermione's heartbeat in her mind was deafening. She could feel all the blood rushing to her head and she found herself trying desperately not to swoon like some Victorian heroine. "I-I have?" She licked her lips as she began threading her fingers together nervously with her hands clasped in front of her. She watched as Severus' eyes flickered over her from head to toe, studying her behaviour, and she found herself wondering if her attraction to him was written all over her face.
"Yes, you have Hermione." Severus reached out as he spoke and pried her joined hands apart; he had to stop himself from rubbing his thumbs over them gently before letting them go. "I don't know how, and for the love of Merlin I cannot even attempt to puzzle out why, but you have become…a friend to me." He frowned and folded his arms across his chest, building up his defences as he awaited her reaction.
Hermione stared at him and were it not for his insecure gaze she may not have spoken at all. However she found herself compelled by the need to reassure him and so she smiled warmly at him.
"Thank you Severus; you have no idea what that means to me," she offered with as much sincerity as her disappointed heart would allow her to muster.
It means I'm a fool for entertaining the idea that a man like you could be interested in a silly little girl like me, she thought sadly.
"You have become a very good friend to me too, and I know it seems strange what with me being your student and all, but it's just like Minerva and I, or Hagrid and I," she spoke as if it was of no major concern to her, attempting to cover up her attraction.
"Yes…I suppose it is the same." Severus nodded in agreement all the while thinking…Hagrid? She thinks of me in the same way she thinks of Hagrid? Good thing I didn't give into my urges and kiss her, she obviously isn't attracted to me. He strode over to the door and turned to speak once more before he disillusioned himself, "My classroom, 10 mintues." And with that he was gone.
Hermione slid down the wall which had been supporting her throughout their entire exchange and slumped on the floor dramatically. The only thing worse than wanting my teacher? Wanting my friend who also happens to be my teacher and who doesn't return my feelings. Nice work Hermione, she thought as she covered her face with her hands.
X~X
Hagrid? Fucking Hagrid, really? Severus had returned to his classroom and was currently sitting at his desk ruminating on the encounter he had just had with Hermione. Hermione, beautiful, half-naked, lovely Hermione, he thought before he groaned and rubbed his face dramatically, as if hoping he could wipe away the vision of her which swam before his eyes. I could have sworn she felt something more, but she seemed perfectly happy with my offer of friendship. I'm just another Minerva or Hagrid to her. Well she's got another thing coming if she thinks she can talk to me about Ronald Bloody Weasley, he thought with a snort of derision. He heard a knock at the door and braced himself. "Enter."
X~X
She knew it was immature, but Hermione couldn't help herself. As she had reached into her wardrobe for her usual t-shirt and jeans she had remembered the way everyone had looked at her the day Ron and Harry had come to visit. Before she knew what she was doing, she had arranged her hair into a rather grown-up looking chignon that was secured by not only Muggle hair grips but also a rather complex holding charm. She applied a light layer of natural make up with only a touch of subtle red on her lips standing out. She stood in front of her wardrobe and grimaced, here is where the plan to look like a mature, attractive woman fails. Hermione rifled through her wardrobe seeking something that would enhance her assets without looking too obvious. She settled on a long-sleeved top in dark blue that had a plunging neckline but when teamed with jeans looked fairly casual. The sleeves insured that barely any of her skin was showing but the top fit her like a second skin, and she knew Ron (and even Harry) had always found the neckline distracting. She decided not to bother with her robes; it's a Sunday, he wasn't wearing his, if we're brewing they'll end up coming off anyway, she thought to herself as she made her way to his classroom. Along the way she had run into a few fellow students and she had noticed the boys smiling a little more fiercely or staring a little longer than usual. She pushed her nervousness away as she reached the classroom door and smirked before knocking gently. "Enter," the honeyed tones of her professor washed over her.
X~X
Fuck, I am absolutely fucked, Severus thought as he watched Hermione enter the room. She looked breathtakingly beautiful, and the top she wore clung to her and showed all her curves.
"Hi Severus; what are we going to get up to today then?" She hopped up on his desk and favoured him with a genuine smile.
Well, Hermione, first I am going to pin you down on this desk and kiss every inch of your body, and then I think I might take you up against the wall or…no, perhaps bent over the desk. After that I will take you to my bed where I plan on keeping you for the rest of my natural born life.
"Brew potions," he stated with as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Really Granger, aren't you supposed to be the smart one?" He drawled before getting up and walking past her as if totally unaffected by her presence. Had he looked around he would have noticed the disappointed expression that graced Hermione's face briefly before she hopped down from the desk with a smile.
"What potion?" she asked from directly behind him.
"Merlin Hermione, I said you were a friend not that I wanted to become joined at the bloody hip," he growled before heading into the storeroom. Hmmm, her hips against my hips, actually that's not such a bad idea, he thought as he rooted through the shelves for an ingredient.
"Sorry Severus," she spoke from his right hand side and he jumped, knocking a few jars to the floor. When he ascertained that none had smashed, he finally looked up at Hermione in anger, trying not to soften when he clocked her sheepish expression.
"How in the bloody hell do you keep popping up beside me?" He growled incredulously.
Hermione blushed and looked down at her feet before she spoke nervously, "Severus…something is happening. It's like a kind of chemical reaction, and it's going to explode in our faces if we don't deal with it right now!"
"Hermione…I thought…I mean… I don't think we should be standing here having this conversation." Severus gulped unsure of how to proceed.
"You're right, but look," she pointed to the floor by the door, "it's spreading already, how will we get out of here?"
Spreading? Severus thought in confusion as he turned to look where her hand was pointing. Bloody fucking hell; chemical reaction, explode in our faces…it's not our attraction, it's the bloody contaminated floor coming into contact with a leaking vial of…something I can't see dammit! He backed her into the corner and covered her body with his own before he cradled her face into his chest, protecting her from whatever explosion was about to take place.
She smells amazing, I can't think clearly with her this close to me, he thought as he let his hand slide over her hair.
Oh my god, he smells amazing, must focus on not sniffing audibly, she thought as she breathed in his scent.
The puddle of dangerous looking goo on the floor made an ominous whistling sound before it splattered all over the room, covering Severus' back. Sensing the danger had passed Severus effortlessly picked Hermione up and carried her into the classroom before setting her down on the floor and shedding his shirt that was smoking and disintegrating.
"Fuck," he muttered as the burning began to take effect. He grabbed Hermione by the waist and sat her up on his desk before running his hands over her arms, looking for any injuries. He noticed her stifle a shiver. "Are you ok?" he asked through gritted teeth as he cupped her cheek in his hand and stared into her eyes. She stared back before pulling him into the cradle of her legs and wrapping her arms around him, hugging him fiercely. Were it not for his burns that her hands came into contact with Severus could have stayed there forever.
"Oh…I'm so sorry. Are you ok?" He had winced under her hands as she had touched his injured skin. She pulled back to look at him, and Severus wondered of his burns would be ok as long as it took to press her onto his desk and have his way with her.
"Fine," he gritted out.
Hermione gently pushed him away from her before she jumped down from the desk and ran over to where his medicinal potions kit was stored for emergencies such as this. She came back over with a jar of burn paste and handed it to her professor. He began rubbing it into his wounds as fast as he could but the pain was unbearable. He flinched in anticipation every time he got near to a burn.
"Here, let me," Hermione offered as she scooped a liberal amount from the jar and began gently applying it to his skin. He quivered a little and she looked up at him trying to gauge his reactions. She found that if she was staring into his eyes when she touched him, he didn't flinch as much and so she kept eye contact, trying desperately to ignore the fact that Severus was shirtless in front of her and she was touching him.
Merlin, her hands feel incredible, Severus thought as he stifled a shiver.
Gods I could touch him all day, Hermione thought as she continued looking into his eyes. She began biting her lip as she concentrated on maintaining as much eye contact as possible, without blushing.
Not the bloody lip biting, Severus whined internally as he glanced away. He looked down and the vision of her worrying her lower lip with her teeth was replaced with the sight of her hands caressing his naked chest. Even worse, he thought as he struggled with his self-control. Poor girl must be scared half to death, this must be like rubbing Hagrid's naked chest for her…oh gods, he thought in mortification.
"Hermione, I am so sorry about all this," he muttered gesturing to his body before covering his face with his hand.
"What? It was my fault; I'm the one who should be sorry!" Hermione pulled his hand from his face and held it in her own.
"Yes, I have no doubt that you are extremely sorry. Your reckless actions have resulted in you having to not only see your friend and professor half naked, but touch him too. I am sure this is the perfect punishment; you will almost certainly never behave so foolishly again," he chastised her but his smirk showed it was done in jest rather than genuine disapproval.
"Hmmm," Hermione answered half-heartedly as she continued her ministrations.
Hmmm? What does hmmm mean? Severus' mind was racing as he observed her closely.
"What does hmmm mean?"
"It means I'm neither agreeing nor disagreeing with what you said," Hermione spoke in a matter of fact tone as she gestured for him to turn around so she could treat his back.
Severus turned and now that he didn't have to face Hermione, he felt a sudden surge of bravery and curiosity take hold of him. "What, you plan on causing more accidents in the future? You've already admitted it was your fault so what part could you possibly disagree with?"
"I wouldn't class this as the perfect punishment." Hermione closed her eyes in horror at what had just slipped out. She had meant to emphasise the 'perfect' to make it seem like there are worse or more appropriate punishments, but her urges caused her to emphasise the 'punishment' part of the phrase, which was the part she wholly disagreed with.
There was a pause of silence.
"You mean you wouldn't class this as the perfect punishment? That there are more nasty alternatives that I haven't considered?" Severus questioned her as he tried to understand.
"Hmmmm," Hermione murmured as she continued working on the last few burns.
"Stop with the bloody hmmmming and talk to me," Severus spat out in frustration.
Hermione was torn, she didn't want to lie to Severus, but she couldn't exactly tell him the truth; Actually this has been the best 5 minutes of my life. and I don't think I've ever been rewarded so well for bad behaviour, she thought with an ill-disguised snort of laughter.
"What's so funny?" Severus huffed as he crossed his arms, fighting the urge to peer over his shoulder.
"I would hardly class this as punishment, it's not exactly difficult, the burn paste smells quite lovely compared to some other medicinal concoctions poor Madam Pomfrey has to deal with and well…it's just not really a punishment," Hermione spluttered in embarrassment.
"Hermione, I am your half-naked, old, professor turned friend. It's like you having to rub that stuff on Minerva or Hagrid; are you saying that doesn't bother you?" Ha, she'll have to admit how freaked out she is now.
"It's nothing like that," Hermione said as she wrinkled her nose in disgust at the thought of Hagrids hairy stomach. "If any of my friends required treatment I would happily help, but you're not the worst patient in the world." There, that should get him onto a new subject, Hermione thought.
"How is it different?" Severus asked stubbornly.
"It just…is," Hermione muttered hesitantly.
"How though?" He turned to face her and she merely turned him away from her once more.
"I don't know Severus. Why does it matter?" Hermione gritted her teeth an annoyance. She was finished with his burns but literally couldn't face him so kept rubbing paste gingerly onto previously burnt areas.
"How is it different from Hagrid?"
"Well you're a lot smaller for a start; less terrain to cover," Hermione remarked dryly.
"And?"
"And what?" Hermione was utterly exasperated with his curiosity by this point.
"You said for a start, so what else is different?" Severus demanded insecurely as he rotated to face her yet again
"You have a high pain threshold; less moaning for me to put up with than someone like Hagrid would do," Hermione offered with an eye-roll as she gripped him gently by the shoulders and swivelled him away from her once more.
"And?"
"That's it; those were my two reasons."
"Really?"
"Yes, really."
"Promise?"
Oh fuck I can't promise him that, my word will mean nothing if I do that, Hermione thought desperately.
"You paused! What's the other reason?" Severus smirked triumphantly wishing he could turn around and see her flustered face.
"Oh for gods sake Severus, why does it matter?" Hermione yelled in frustration.
"Hermione, I am a faculty member, watch the tone," Severus grumbled at her cheek.
Another pause took place.
"Well? What else?"
"Oh for the love of Merlin, you're not exactly the worst male specimen in the world. I mean of all the people in this school I could be forced to see half-naked, I can't exactly complain!" Hermione yelled before she gasped and covered her mouth with her hand.
Another pause took place.
"Not the worst male specimen in the world, why thank you. High praise indeed," Severus sneered in embarrassment. She obviously thinks I'm more attractive than Hagrid or Filius, but that's still not exactly glowing praise. "I have always strove to be 'not the worst'."
He still hasn't figured out that I like seeing him naked, thank heavens, Hermione thought. But now his feelings are hurt, and I've offended him.
"Perhaps I didn't make myself clear…" Hermione began guardedly before being cut off.
"Oh no, you made yourself perfectly clear," Severus drawled sarcastically.
"Oh good, so you are aware that out of all the male students and faculty in the grounds there is nobody I would rather see half-naked than you? Good. We're done here." Hermione spat out cruelly as her frustration got the better of her.
Severus turned to tell she had missed a spot on his shoulder and then kiss her thoroughly, but when all he saw was her flouncing out of the room he realised she wasn't merely done with treating him; she was done with him altogether.
X~X
Maybe I can test out? Leave Hogwarts in the middle of the night and never return, Hermione thought frantically as she ran back to Gryffindor Tower.
"Hermione, could you come here please?"
Oh shit, Minerva. What, has he flooed her already? Please remove Miss Granger from the castle she is a filthy little perv, Hermione's mind drawled.
"Oh Minerva, would you mind if I come tomorrow it's just I-"
"I'm afraid I require your presence now, Miss Granger," Minerva offered sympathetically.
Hermione walked towards her head of house feeling decidedly uncomfortable. She knows! Could this day get any worse, she thought. As she reached the office she came to the conclusion that today could indeed get a great deal worse.
"Hey Mione, can we talk?" Ron stood in the doorway with his hands in his pockets.
X~X
She would rather see me half-naked than anyone else in the school? Not Thomas or all those sixth year boys who follow her around? What about the Defence teacher, Shardlow? All the other senior girls fawn over him. Severus paced nervously across the worn floor of his classroom, still shirtless. I can ignore this and avoid her like the plague or I can use this information to my advantage and seduce her…No, I can't manipulate her like some silly girl with a crush, this is Hermione. I decided earlier today that she was a valuable friend, and I couldn't bear to lose her, I can't take advantage of her like that. Severus continued pacing but his thoughts were interrupted by a throat clearing from the doorway.
"Not that I don't enjoy the sight of a shirtless young man on a Sunday morning, but Severus don't you think perhaps you should be dressed appropriately in your classroom?" Minerva arched her brow at him, her lips quirking upwards in a wry smile.
"Bloody hell," Severus rumbled as he wandlessly clothed himself in a white shirt.
"That's better; you don't want to end up with a fan club like that bumbling Lockhart had," Minerva laughed light-heartedly.
"That is a fairly unlikely outcome," Severus declared as he winced at the sensitive skin knitting back together.
"Oh come now; I've seen worse. You are a fine young man," Minerva informed him dispassionately.
"Yes apparently I am 'not the worst', a matter which has already provided me with a great deal of confidence today."
"I'm not sure I follow?" Minerva walked into the room and began nosing around his shelves. "Where do you keep the tea?"
"I don't keep tea in my classroom, who would I drink it with? Students?" He scoffed at the idea.
Minerva merely rolled her eyes before summoning Artie and asking for some tea. "I think it's time you and I put the past behind us Severus and moved on from our previous assumptions about one another. Although, before we go much further I simply must ask, why on earth were you shirtless?"
"Granger knocked over a vial of Bulbadox juice which came into contact with gods only knows what on the floor and exploded. I suffered severe burns, and the shirt I was wearing melted off my back."
Minerva took in the pink tinged patches on his skin and the white scrap of burnt fabric on the floor. "Oh dear, was Hermione looking for help when I stopped her? My, my, she was in rather a hurry I suppose."
"No, I told her I would be quite sufficient at treating myself; I'm sure I have no idea why she was in such a rush," Severus replied indifferently.
"Well, young Mr Weasley certainly stopped her in her tracks." Minerva joked as she began preparing the tea.
"Weasley?" Severus enquired curiously.
"Yes. Ronald Weasley turned up today seeking an audience with Miss Granger; apparently they've had some sort of a falling out, and he didn't want to attempt to fix it in a letter. Quite a mature way of dealing with the situation I must admit." Minerva handed Severus a cup of tea.
Severus stood nursing the hot drink in his hand, enjoying the grounding feeling of the heat burning his palms and jolting him back to reality. "Yes, she was…upset yesterday. To be honest, I'm not entirely sure he will leave Hogwarts with all his limbs," he snorted in amusement.
"Oh dear, perhaps I shouldn't have left them alone in my office. I presumed they would be able to sort things out fairly amicably," Minerva fretted as she sipped at her tea.
"You left them alone in your office? Isn't that a tad irresponsible?" Severus sneered sceptically.
"I don't see a problem with it. Do you really think he's in that much danger? I know our Hermione has a bit of a temper but she is a responsible young woman and I have faith in her," Minerva argued passionately.
Our Hermione, I wonder how much of our relationship Minerva has clocked, Severus thought anxiously. "It's hardly my place to comment on your little Gryffindor's; I don't know Granger well enough to speculate," Severus offered nonchalantly before draining his cup.
"Come now Severus, I am no fool," Minerva scoffed before staring him down determinedly. "I am well aware of your fondness for Miss Granger and in turn, her fondness for you. Do not attempt to convince me that you don't care for the girl, or know her as well as I do."
Severus merely stared at the Gryffindor woman in shock. Well aware of our fondness? I bloody hope not.
"Just see that it doesn't become anything that could be misconstrued by others. I know Filius, Hagrid and I consider Hermione as an equal, a friend even, but none of us are young males who seem to parade around shirtless in front of her," Minerva stood as she spoke, tidying the tea things.
"Don't be ridiculous Minerva. Why are you even here? I thought you wanted to put the past behind us and now, here you stand, throwing more accusations in my face," Severus yelled as his anger escalated.
"I throw no accusations, only an offer of friendly advice," Minerva stated calmly. "I do owe you an apology Severus, but I fear now is not the time to get into such heavy matters as the last twenty years; not to worry, that conversation will keep until you are in a more forgiving mood."
"Hadn't you better go and check on your cubs before they kill one another?" Severus spat out, enraged at the witch's audacity.
"Yes, you're probably right. Or perhaps they will have sorted out their issues, and I will interrupt their passionate reconciliation?" Minerva suggested as her eyes carefully studied the puzzling man in front of her.
"Perhaps," Severus mumbled quietly before sweeping into the storeroom to clean up.
Oh dear, what on earth am I going to do about that? Minerva thought as she noticed the pained and insecure expression that crossed her potions professor's face.
Minerva left the classroom and was stopped in her tracks by the sight of Hermione pacing back and forth across the corridor talking to herself. "Hermione, where is Mr Weasley? What are you doing down here?" She enquired kindly as she approached her favourite student.
"Oh, he left already," Hermione waved the comment off as if it was of no concern to her. "I was just going to check on Professor Snape and apologise for my careless behaviour; I caused a bit of an accident you see," Hermione spoke with a great deal more compassion than when she had discussed Ron, and her cheeks were tinged with red.
Minerva eyed the girl warily and considered some previous whisperings she had heard. Poppy, some friends in Hogsmeade and several portraits had commented on the developing friendship between Severus and Hermione. Minerva herself had thought he seemed quite enraptured by Hermione's beauty the day she had allowed the girl to attend classes in non-uniform. She thought of Albus and how he would deal with the situation, and although it pained her sever the two war heroes from one another, she felt it was the right thing to do. "Hermione, Professor Snape is fine, and I assure you he does not blame you for the accident," Minerva began, feeling a great deal of guilt at seeing how pleased this information made Hermione. "However, unless you can find a few willing participants to join you, I'm afraid we must put a stop to these weekend potions lessons." Minerva watched as Hermione's face fell and was left absolutely sure that she was doing the right thing, judging by the girl's emotional response. "It just isn't safe; had both of you been injured there would have been nobody to raise the alarm, and you may not have been happened upon until Monday morning! I really must insist that unless there are more students involved that it does not continue." Minerva watched as a fire began to burn in the girl's eyes; Hermione was always respectful, but Minerva was well aware that she had no problem arguing with faculty members.
"That seems a bit extreme Professor; I'm not sure Professor Snape will appreciate his authority being undermined," Hermione began arguing proudly as she stuck her chin out. "In fact, I am almost certain that he will-"
"Hermione, Severus agrees with me; he thinks it is for the best." Minerva cut her off sharply not giving the girl any more rope to hang herself with.
"Severus agrees with you?" Hermione asked quietly.
"Yes, he does. So shall I help you recruit more students for this little club or-"
"No, it's fine Professor. These potions lessons have been a bit of a waste of time if I'm honest; it's not like I'm going to fail, there's really no need to put Professor Snape out." Hermione lied convincingly although Minerva saw through the act. "At least, I'll have my weekends back now!" Hermione laughed before heading down the corridor and out of sight.
Minerva heard the door of the potions classroom click shut and with a sigh she walked back and knocked on the door.
"Enter."
She walked in and saw Severus scribbling furiously on parchment, his robes back on and every button in place.
"Severus, it seems Miss Granger will no longer be requiring-"
"Yes Minerva, I heard. It is of no concern to me."
"Excellent. I shall see you in the Great Hall for lunch," Minerva offered before leaving the room and closing the door behind her. As she walked briskly down the hallway she sighed dramatically. All this meddling is rather vexing, even if it is for the greater good, she thought to herself as the guilt began to seep in. She couldn't let Hermione and Severus damage their reputations by allowing these private sessions to continue. She could see the lines of proper behaviour were already becoming blurred and, unfair as it was, there was a difference between Hermione and Severus being alone together and Hermione and Hagrid being alone together. Severus was, despite his flaws, becoming quite a catch. He was a war hero, whose bravery eclipsed even Harry Potter himself; he was one of the most successful potion masters in the wizarding world and he was a fairly young, attractive, single wizard. It would be improper for me to allow their relationship to flourish while Hermione is still a student of Hogwarts, she justified the matter to herself. Besides, she is entirely too young and too good for a grumpy, former Death Eater in his late thirties, no matter how much we all owe him, Minerva thought sadly.
X~X
After Minerva had left his classroom the first time Severus had waited a few moments before deciding to seek Hermione out. When he reached the doorway he heard voices and he paused to listen-
"Yes, he does. So shall I help you recruit more students for this little club or-"
"No, it's fine Professor. These potions lessons have been a bit of a waste of time if I'm honest; it's not like I'm going to fail, there's really no need to put Professor Snape out. At least I'll have my weekends back now!" He heard Hermione say before she laughed gently.
Severus closed the door without giving a thought to alerting them to his presence. At least I'll have my weekends back now, he thought bitterly. He spelled his robes back on and marched over to his desk, pulling out a sheet of parchment and a quill. He began writing down everything Hermione had said in the last few days, trying to determine what she actually did want, when he was interrupted by Minerva.
"Severus, it seems Miss Granger will no longer be requiring-"
"Yes Minerva, I heard. It is of no concern to me," he interrupted trying not to acknowledge the disappointment he felt.
"Excellent. I shall see you in the Great Hall for lunch," Minerva offered before leaving the room and closing the door behind her.
What in the bloody hell is Hermione thinking? She wants to work with me one minute, she doesn't the next? We agreed to continue these sessions only this morning when I was in her room, he thought as he attempted to figure the beautiful girl out. I would think that perhaps my obvious attraction towards her has made her uncomfortable, but she just said she would rather see me half-naked than anyone else at Hogwarts. Severus got up and began pacing furiously around the room. At Hogwarts…Weasley wasn't at Hogwarts when she said that. Now she's seen him and suddenly she doesn't want to see me at all, let alone half-bloody-naked. She must have realised my attraction towards her and been flattered into behaving flirtatiously. I am an idiot, when will I realise that not everyone feels as strongly and loyally as I do. He tore up the parchment in front of him in anger. She obviously sees me as nothing more than a friend to flirt with when her boyfriend has upset her. Well, he thought stubbornly, if she thinks she can boost her self-esteem by getting a reaction from me she can think again. I will never allow it to show that I feel anything other than a platonic kinship with Hermione ever again.
X~X
Hermione closed her bedroom door before leaning wearily against it. As soon as she was ensconced in her room a few tears began to fall, and soon enough she was outright sobbing against her door. How could I be so stupid? Her breathing grew erratic is she hiccupped her way through her tears, causing her to panic. Breathe Hermione, it's one thing to have panic attacks over seeing people die before your eyes, but not over a failed attempt to seduce your teacher! Hermione had felt like a complete idiot over what she had said to Severus and how she had left things; she had spent her entire conversation with Ron planning exactly what she should say to him.
She had decided to apologise for storming off and saying inappropriate things. Her plan had then been to plead with him until he was willing to move on from it and never mention it again. A little part of her had dared to hope that he wouldn't want to forget what had been said, that he would acknowledge her feelings and return them. She knew now that such thoughts had been childlike and fantastical. As if a responsible, honourable man like Severus would be swayed by a silly girl's adolescent confessions, she thought despondently. She didn't know why she was surprised when Minerva told her he had agreed that their private sessions must come to an end. How did I expect him to react? What would I do if I was a teacher and one of my students claimed they wanted to see me half-naked? I'd report the entire situation to the necessary authorities! I should think myself lucky he has spared me by keeping it to himself, Minerva was obviously unaware of why he wanted to end the sessions. Gods, he even managed to make it seem as if it was all Minerva's doing and he merely agreed. Hermione brushed the tears from her cheeks and sniffed pitifully. I need to keep my distance, she thought with a new sense of conviction. I won't push him away or ignore any attempts at civility, I will be perfectly friendly if I come across him, but I will avoid him at all costs. It's what we both need.
Hermione began inhaling deeply, relieved that her new breathing exercises seemed to be helping her avoid panic attacks. Ron was always uncharacteristically patient when she suffered from one of her attacks; he was always so good at calming her down. Their conversation earlier hadn't been much of a conversation at all; she had seen him standing there looking sheepish and had thrown her arms around him, whilst apologising profusely for hexing him. He had accepted her apology and offered his own in return for his insensitivity. When he had moved in to kiss her though, she had pulled away. She had explained that she wasn't sure what she wanted or where they stood as a couple, but that she loved him with all her heart as a friend and she was so glad to see him. Hermione felt that he had taken it surprisingly well; he had looked a little put out but he told her he understood if she needed a little time to think. And then he had given her just that; all he had asked as he had grabbed a pinch of floo powder was that she would meet him in Hogsmeade soon and have a proper chat with him, a stipulation which she had readily agreed to.
Hermione felt a kind of calm settle over her. She would seriously consider her relationship with Ron but she was already fairly certain that they should part ways, and soon. Seeing how he had behaved today had allowed her to feel hopeful that their friendship could be salvaged. Despite the disastrous encounters with Severus today, she felt she had reached an important turning point; she had accepted that they would never be anything more than friendly acquaintances, and despite the dull throb of pain she felt in her chest at the thought of never being with him, she knew this was the most sensible way to deal with the situation. It was a crush that had gotten out of hand, and it would never be anything more, or so she thought.
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A/N- I'm sure some of you will be unhappy with the lack of smooching but before you flame please realise that this chapter is an important point in the plot. A student and a teacher, especially with a shared past such as Severus' and Hermione's wouldn't fall into bed together without some serious build up. I mean, he's her teacher...you don't just lean in for a snog and hope for the best lol. I can promise you that the next few chapters are a culmination of all the tense build up we have seen and that you will all get what you are looking for soon. I aim to update at a much quicker rate for the next few chapters so please hang in there my lovely readers. x