BATSCHEME

Chapter 10

Dick tugged on his lower lip as he gave a distasteful look at the paper in his hand. Why him? As he didn't go through enough humiliation in his life as it was.

It was due tomorrow though!

One would think Bruce would actually keep up with Dick's responsibilities; had Mia not told him Dick needed to join two extracurricular activities?!

He cringed at the thought of a physical. Bleh.

Luckily, Dick's physical wasn't due until later. It could've been worse though - he could be needing those thingies with the needles that stung - what were they called? Right, injections! In the circus, he really hadn't kept up with them that well since he would only get injections when a free clinic was in town.

His aunt though, had made sure to get him up to date on all his required vaccinations (which was good considering Dick wouldn't be able to attend Gotham Academy is she hadn't).

Unfortunately however, his physical wasn't recent enough.

So he needed a physical AND a signature.

Scowling, he glared at the entrance to the den. Before he could change his mind, he barreled on in.

The paper in his hands was tense as he marched himself over towards the man on the sofa and plopped down beside him.

Bruce looked up from his tablet with considerable surprise.

Huffing, Dick stuffed the paper in the guy's face.

"Here."

Bruce took it and his brow furrowed as he read it over.

"Apparently," Dick began loudly, "you need permission to join the soccer team. Who knew, right?" he asked sarcastically.

Ignoring the obvious sarcasm (as they guy usually tended to do), Bruce looked at him curiously, "You're joining the soccer team?"

Dick snorted, "No, I just decided to bring you the clearly labeled, soccer permission slip for fun." At Bruce's unimpressed look, he exclaimed, "Yes, I'm joining the team! The school's making me join two extracurricular activities… Did Mia not tell you any of this or did you just forget?"

Annoyed, Bruce retorted, "I didn't forget. I was just curious as to why you chose Soccer."

Dick shrugged, "I also joined the mathletes. Soccer seemed to be an okay option."

Truth was, it made him feel less like a liar if he took part in what he was supposed to be doing instead of being here aka, in the presence of the world's best criticizer.

Bruce stared at the paper a little more and Dick suddenly jolted, "Oh and your signature it all the headmaster needs since he already knows about my …" Dick paused and made gestures with his hands, "you know, situation. It doesn't matter that you're not my legal guardian or parent."

Even as he spoke, Dick felt a cold dagger tauntively poke at him. Because he was lying between his teeth.

His eyes hardened.

No, he wasn't. Blood or not, Bruce was not his parent. He wasn't.

Without another word, Bruce made a quick scribble on the paper before he handed it to Dick.

"Thanks." he muttered. "Oh, and they told me that I also need a physical so getting one done sorta soon would be nice."

Bruce nodded in acknowledgement and Dick started getting up.

"Wait." The guy's voice took a more serious, stern tone and Dick's hackles rose immediately as he turned to look at Bruce's calculating eyes.

"You covered your tracks well but not well enough. I know you somehow had access to JL information. Am I correct in assuming you know several if not all secret identities by now?"

Well that was quite the wrecking ball. Bruce sure didn't deal in subtlety.

Dick worked his jaw, a million answers coming to him until he settled for a simple, "Yes."

He'd honestly done it only out of curiosity and breaking through triple encryptions had been a thrilling experience.

Ice seemingly frosting over Bruce's eyes, he said, "It is dangerous to meddle with such things - much more dangerous than you think. Don't make a habit of doing so."

Dick rolled his eyes, "Sure."

Bruce regarded him with an intense gaze, "I mean it." he paused before continuing "Clark Kent will be visiting in a few days with his son, Conner."

Dick's eyes widened into saucers. Superman?!

Cool!

Bruce cut off his excitement though, "Do not bring anything up and do try to be on your best behavior."

Dick was already getting ready to argue about how he was always on his best behavior but Bruce continued.

"Whatever this little rebellious streak of your is-"

"I prefer smart-aleck streak"

"-control it for at least that day."

Bruce was probably referring to Dick's newfound tendency to back talk (or as Dick put it, smart talk). Specifically to Bruce.

What could he say, his wisecrack retorts to basically anything Bruce said in Dick's presence were hilarious; Bruce's irritated face alone made them all the while worth it.

It was Dick's own little form of rebelling and he had yet to see how far Bruce's buttons could be pushed. Still…

Sighing, Dick answered. "Fine"

He shifted his weight to his other foot, "Anything else?"

Bruce gave a single shake of his head so Dick took it as his cue to leave.

Once within the walls of his room, he crashed head-first onto the bed.

Well that had been… interesting to say the least. All things considered, Dick was still in one piece and he'd gotten his permission slip signed - that was a win in his book

And he would get to meet Superman soon! And his son. Whoever that was as Superman's files had mentioned nothing of him.

Dick grinned mischievously onto the blue duvet: he knew how to get said info though.

/0\0/0\0/0\

He was rather dark for someone who was raised by a blue boyscout.

That was the first thing Dick decided about the blue eyed boy with the seemingly permanent frown who stood in front of him.

He figured Conner could've turned out worse.

If he anything, Conner was probably in his rebellious years as well. Along with having a serious/angsty mood mixed in somewhere. He had to have something along those lines to not have a permanent smile on his face after living with Clark Kent.

Seriously, if Bruce was the epitome of dark and gloomy, then Mr. Kent was the epitome of day and sunshine.

By no means however, did that mean Dick wasn't absolutely awestruck. Because he was actually getting to meet Superman! Sure Mr. Kent wasn't aware of Dick's knowledge (and if Bruce had his way, he would never find out), but still!

Plus, if Dick had his way, then Mr. Kent would find out. Maybe.

The four exchanged pleasantries. When Bruce introduced Dick like a "friend's son", Mr. Kent gave the guy a really weird look that he probably thought no one but Bruce noticed. Obviously, he was wrong.

Dick just smiled innocently.

Quietly (and hopefully subtlety), he studied Conner. He knew he was Mr. Kent's son but he couldn't help but notice the kid looked a little too much like Clark. The hardcore investigation he'd embarked on to dig up more details about Connor (aka hack a little more on his laptop in his spare time) had produced zilch.

Literally, Conner was never even mentioned in any of the files Dick had looked at. It was quite baffling to say the least.

Dick blinked as Bruce suddenly drew him out of his thoughts. "Dick, why don't you show Conner your room?"

It wasn't a question.

Which wasn't fair because Bruce could boss him around and yet he'd told Dick to keep a leash on his mouth. Even so, the guy was probably expecting some sort of reaction in return.

But for the sake of appearing respectful in front of his favorite superhero, Dick kept his smart-mouth comment inside his mouth.

Smiling and trying to do so genuinely, he nodded. "Okay. Come on Conner."

He resisted the urge to smirk as he saw a surprised look fly over Bruce's face for a millisecond before it disappeared.

Instead, Dick continued the walk to his room, going up the stairs, taking a few turns, and of course, talking the entire time.

"So that there, is an actual armor suit, probably from some really old era."

"And that portrait is supposedly an original from Da Vinci."

"And then that vase is like super expensive and I think the writings on it are in some dead language."

By this point, Dick had to have spoken about thousands of difference tea sets, portraits, rugs, vases, and basically anything that caught his attention. Conner had simply stayed silent all throughout, not even nodding or giving any indication he was listening.

Which was why Dick almost stumbled when the serious boy spoke.

"It's Latin."

Dick gaped at him for all of 2 seconds before composing himself. "So I was right! Since you know, Latin is a dead language and all."

Conner stared impassively as Dick smirked, "And I was also right in that you can talk!" He punched the air, "Victory!"

All he received in return for his enthusiasm was a bemused look. It was some sort of expression other than a frown though so he would take it.

Gesturing forward, he continued walking before abruptly stopping at a door. "And this," he declared before pushing the door open, "Is my humble abode."

He really hadn't personalized the room as he didn't consider it his own just as he didn't consider this house - manor - his home.

For that reason, the room still looked pretty much like it had when he'd arrived: in other words, a guest room.

Well, almost like a guest room. Dick smirked, there were a few things he'd added (well Alfred had added)

Sitting on a blue saucer chair, he motioned Conner over and pointed at a red one.

Once Conner was seated, Dick took to doing what he did best… Being social and getting people out of their shell.

And no, he didn't have ulterior motives; now that he thought about it, why was he trying to befriend this kid?

It wasn't that he befriended people with ulterior motives in mind because he didn't (yeesh, he wasn't that low), but he really didn't know why he was so set on getting Conner to like him.

It wasn't because his dad was Superman, that much Dick knew.

Dick hadn't been purposefully social for a while now. Even his friendship with Barbara began w

ith her doing the whole social thing first.

Before… before Dick's life went downhill, he remembered being an extremely social person, like talk to everybody and smile at anyone-who-looked-like-they-needed-it social.

He wasn't like that anymore. And yet here he was, trying to chat with a complete stranger (well not complete complete stranger but still someone he didn't know).

Maybe he missed coming out of his shell more often not just when he was with Barbara. Maybe it looked like Conner could use someone to talk to. Maybe Dick wanted to see if he still had his legendary social skills. Maybe there was no reason.

But it felt- it felt different, it felt nice for a change. So he continued.

It definitely wasn't easy and had Dick spoken to Conner more than a month ago, he would have been very discouraged.

Living with the cold call that liked to call itself Bruce though (and that Dick had made his personal mission to annoy and irritate and generally make the billionaire frickin' notice Dick and actually acknowledge him if only as a result of the shenanigans Dick pulled. If becoming insufferable was the only way to be noticed, then that was what he was going to do), the acrobat had learned how to deal with stoic slabs of rocks.

Compared to Bruce, Conner was a fluffy marshmallow with nutella.

And also he was only 11 as Dick had figured due to his interrogation… which was basically what the first five minutes of their conversation were.

Literally. Dick would ask questions like how only are you? and do you play sports? And receive one-worded answers.

So throwing caution to the wind, Dick crossed his arms and lifted an eyebrow. "You know that feeling you get when you're trying to socialize but you are getting no help whatsoever? It's very irritating." he deadpanned.

Conner just shrugged.

Dick sighed. Then he smirked.

Conner was indeed 11. Dick had indeed some things that personalized his room.

Like the latest FIFA video game.

"Say, Conner, do you like Soccer?" He asked, his voice dripping with innocence as he stood and began rummaging through a drawer.

Giving him a suspicious look, Conner slowly nodded.

Then his eyes became saucers and his jaw dropped at the object Dick suddenly held in his hands.

"You have FIFA 18!?" he exclaimed.

"Mhm." Dick answered slyly before breaking out into a contagious grin. "Wanna play?"

Half an hour later and both boys seemed like they'd known each other forever.

"Quick, do a foot fake!" Conner anxiously instructed.

With his hands automatically moving on his controller, Dick's eyes stayed locked on the screen as he moved closer and closer to the opposing team's goals.

Defenders swamped him and beside him, Conner growled with frustration. "Come on, come on!"

Undeterred, Dick quickly did an advanced rainbow and chased after the ball. He made his player do a quick hocus pocus which diverted the attention of the player trying to block him. With the area clear for a split second, he aimed, he shot…

"GOOOOAAAAL!" Both boys cheered enthusiastically.

"That was so cool, dude!"

Grinning, Dick answered. "What can I say? I'm a natural. You're pretty good yourself."

Conner just shook his head, "Still, wow. Do you actually, like, play?"

Dick nodded, "Yeah. I actually just joined my school's soccer team and," he paused and beamed proudly, "I'm just as good on my own two feet."

"I can believe that."

Happy at the progress he'd made, Dick asked, "How about we take a break? Do you want a snack?"

Conner nodded, "Sure."

As both walked down to the kitchen, Dick mused out loud, "What's your Dad talking about with Bruce, anyway?"

The change was subtle - barely there, really. But Dick still saw it. The slight stiffness.

"Work Stuff, probably. What are we having for snack?"

The answer was too quick, too dismissive, too how about we drop the subject and move on.

Yeah, Conner was definitely aware as to who his father was. Well this was interesting.

"I don't know. Whatever Alfred deems suitable I guess."

The tenseness disappeared as Conner appeared to visibly deflate.

Interesting indeed.

"So random question," Dick began once they were back in his room. "Is it weird that Superman is my favorite superhero even though I live in Gotham City? One of my friends seems to think so. What do you think?"

Conner squirmed, "I guess not. I mean, you haven't even been in Gotham City that long, right?"

Dick nodded nonchalantly, pretending nothing seem odd. "Right and anyways, had anyone actually seen Batman? He could just be a myth, you know."

Glancing nervously around the room, Conner nodded shakily. "Y-yeah."

Dick smirked, "Here's a piece of advice from friend to friend; don't ever become a criminal."

At Conner's baffled look, Dick continued, "You wouldn't be able to lie your way out of a brown paper bag."

Despite the situation, Conner scowled. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Grabbing a notebook, Dick started writing a message. He had to take into consideration super hearing after all.

I know who Bruce is and I know who your dad is. Bruce knows I do.

Conner just gaped at him before his shock gradually morphed into a wary look.

Are you lying about Bruce knowing?

Dick gave him a seriously look and scribbled down his response.

Do you not know the man I live with!?

This at least earned him a small smile.

Yeah, you're right. How'd you find out?

With my awesome genius skills.

Conner rolled his eyes.

Whatever

Fingering the pencil in his hands, Dick hesitated for a second.

So I really want to meet your dad but Bruce doesn't want him to find out. Can I count on your help to do the impossible aka defy the wishes of a bat?

After reading his inquiry, Conner gave him a long stare. Studied his vulnerable look. And he nodded once.

Let's do it.

AN: I have played FIFA like 3 times in my life so I literally had to look up FIFA Moves on google, sad I know. Lol.

Connor and Dick were originally gonna bond over an epic nerf gun war but then I realized that a nerf gun is well, a gun and Bruce and yeah...

I AM ABOUT TO SMACK SOMETHING. LOOK OUT PILLOWS LOOK OUT PLUSHIES BECAUSE I AM READY TO-

Ahem, sorry. But... whyyyyyyy?! I was literally ready to rant about how my laptop kept on autocorrecting Connor to Conner and how the correct way to spell Conner's name is ConnOr but it's not!

My whole world just exploded.

Oh well. I just fixed it. yay.

Anywho, crazy moments aside (To any concerned person, My plushies are in perfect health without a single bruise), I hope everyone reading this enjoyed Conner and Dick getting to know each other (they're little scheme will be continued next chapter btw).

And Dick being sassy with Bruce was awesome to write.

I loved writing this chapter and I hope you all loved reading it.

Thanks for reading, thanks for the support, and see you next time!

;D

~LB