Note: I apologize for not being able to update for a long, long time... uh, six months? At the same time, thank you for all of those who patiently waited and anticipated the continuation of this fic. I love you all!!
Teaser: Tezuka confronts his real feelings including a bit of his lacking sexual gratification while Fuji despite his promise still feels confused and anxious.
REPOSSESSION
By Deranged-Insanity
Chapter 9
NIGHTTIME EVENTS
I love you.
Tezuka turned his head and searched for the source of those words.
I love you.
The words were so familiar yet they sounded vague.
I love you… Kunimitsu.
It sounded right but the words lack conviction. Incomplete… that was his feeling at the moment and probably at the coming days. Something was aching inside him. It was like a nagging sensation in his chest that kept on throbbing, a hole wanting to be filled in. Tezuka clutched his chest and shut his eyes even more. He didn't want to wake up. He was afraid to face reality.
If only…
If only everything would be the same. If only he would be complete again. No matter how much he reminded himself that he was already whole as an individual, not a mere half to be complemented by another, the incompleteness inside him wouldn't be mended. He just had to be whole. He wanted him to come back. His chest constricted again. He wanted to touch him, to kiss him, and to make love to him. His manhood too was longing as he felt it harden yet he couldn't release the urge. He desired him more and more. He was hiding it but of course, he was also a man and he wanted him. Badly. He wanted him. Worse and more than ever. He wanted him, NOW!
Tezuka opened his eyes in an instant. He was dreaming. Rather, he was in the act of comprehending and confronting his real feelings and… manly urges while he was asleep. He shut his eyes once again. He felt ashamed of himself for thinking those things. But the throb in his chest and his member was still there, he couldn't deny that thus making him all the more ashamed of himself. He reached for the blanket curled between his legs when he suddenly realized that an arm was resting over his stomach. An arm?
He turned his head and saw an angelic sleeping face partially hidden by honey-brown fringes, the arm's owner. There was another throb in his heart but this time, it was out of sheer joy. His heart hammered inside his chest. Was this a dream? He reached out his hand and gently brushed off the hair covering his face, Fuji's face. He stared at the tensai's sleeping form and everything that happened last night at the festival ran back and forth in his mind.
He remembered buying the Ring of Eternal Memory for Fuji. He remembered their pact under the tree. He remembered Fuji's promise to him. Fuji would be back, all he has to do was to wait and to be patient about it.
Another throb… in his member.
Tezuka stiffened. He tossed on his bed and turned to lie down on his side, facing away from Fuji. How shameful. He shouldn't feel like that, like a man deprived of sex throughout his life. Well, it was quite true but he shouldn't feel like that! Not with Fuji!
Fuji's sleeping form tossed, his arm moved from Tezuka's stomach down to his… groin.
Tezuka gulped. There was another throb. He groaned inwardly. Of all places to accidentally and unconsciously place his arm, why there! Damn manhood and damn amnesia for frustrating him. This was going to be hard not until Fuji awakens or 'til Fuji moves his arm anywhere but near his manhood.
* * *
"Pass the eggs, please!" Eiji said while stabbing the bacon on his plate with his fork. Kaido hissed as he passed Eiji the plate of scrambled eggs.
"Gah. I couldn't believe this meal would already serve as our lunch!" Momo exclaimed. It was almost eleven in the morning when the whole gang had their breakfast slash lunch.
Kaido looked at his rival sharply. "You should have waked early so you could've eaten a separate meal for breakfast. Baka, you pig."
"Damn you, Mamushi!" Momo slammed his fists on the table and stood up.
Coach Ryuzaki cleared her throat. "If you want to have a fight, kindly leave the table and go outside. We'll take turns betting on who's going to win between the two of you."
Momo sat back on his chair but still glared at Kaido.
"Looks like you haven't learned your lesson yet." Inui said, adjusting his eyeglasses. "Even the punishments didn't help."
"I agree." It was Ryuzaki-sensei.
"Their rivalry was evident even in the festival." Kawamura added while spreading butter on his toast.
"Nya! But we all had a great time in the festival, right?" Eiji asked as he looked around at everyone else. After all, he was the most enthusiastic of all with the idea of going to the festival.
"We did." Sakuno replied while casting a romantic glance at Ryoma. "Right, Ryoma-kun?"
"Ah." Ryoma averted his eyes.
"Did you enjoy the festival, Fujiko?" It was Eiji.
Fuji looked up. He stopped slicing his ham for a while. "Yes. It was the best of the nights I could ever remember."
Everybody turned his head to Tezuka.
"Ne, why are you all looking at Tezuka?" Fuji's brows furrowed as if he was an innocent child pretending not to know an answer in a question.
"Saa," Oishi was the one who replied this time. He cast a suspicious glance at Tezuka. "Did you enjoy too, Tezuka?"
"Hai." Tezuka's brow twitched. Why does everyone make him accountable for every change in Fuji?
"That's all?" Momo asked disbelievingly.
Tezuka raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
"That's all you can say?" Momo set down his spoon and fork. "I mean, if you really had a great time, how come all you can say is 'Hai'?"
Everyone was really starting to get on his nerves. He drank his tea so as to avoid answering Momo's question.
"By the way, what time did you get home last night?" Inui interrogated. He pushed his glasses back his nose bridge.
"We went home right after the fireworks display." Tezuka answered.
Eiji's mouth hung open. "WHAT? You went home right after the fireworks display??!"
"Is there a problem with that?" Fuji scratched his chin.
"You weren't able to watch the meteor shower!"
"There was a meteor shower?" Sakuno asked. Eiji nodded his head sharply.
Fuji swallowed his soup. "That's alright. I had a good night last night. That's enough for me."
Inui adjusted his glasses. He spotted something. "Fuji,"
"Yes?"
"What's that—"
"—on your finger?" Kawamura finished the question for Inui.
"This?" Fuji showed off the Ring of Eternal Memory on his right ring finger. "Tezuka bought it for me last night." He happily said and yes, he was grinning from ear to ear.
"Are you two also engaged?" Eiji asked rising on his seat and pointing accusingly at Fuji.
Tezuka's grip of his cup tightened, his knuckles were turning white. Everyone was starting to become a pain in the neck, especially Eiji. "It's just a simple gift from me."
"Yeah." Fuji's ear-to-ear grin widened even more, the corners of his mouth revolved around his face for a couple of times already. "It's a friendship ring."
"A friendship ring?" What the heck, Ryoma thought.
"Like a friendship band only, it's a ring." Fuji retorted. He turned his hand to admire the ring.
Ryoma tagged along. "How come Tezuka doesn't have his own?"
Everyone suspiciously turned their eyes towards Tezuka again who hastily drained his tea, his left brow twitching.
"I haven't bought his yet." Fuji laughed. "We weren't able to find anything that suited his liking."
The rest of the team, including the Ryuzakis, nodded though each of them gave Tezuka a suspicious glance. One question ran on their heads, what happened last night between them? Only the two persons in question could answer.
* * *
A few hours later, the former team dipped in the pool and played once again the game they had three days ago. It was Fuji over Kawamura versus Eiji over Momoshiro. Only two did not join the game, Tezuka and Oishi. The former buchou and fukubuchou were sharing small drinks of sake by the pool side.
Oishi spared Tezuka a glance before filling his shot glass. "What was the ring for?"
Tezuka frowned. "Just what Fuji said, it's a friendship ring."
Oishi barked a laugh. "Don't answer me that. A friendship ring? Come on! There's no such thing!"
Tezuka gave a tiny laugh then downed his shot. "Alright! That lady took interest in selling that ring to Syusuke which he seemed to like. That's why I bought it."
"Is that all?" Oishi raised an eyebrow. "Well…?" He added when Tezuka did not respond.
"Well what?" Tezuka turned his head away from Oishi. He now watched their former teammates playing. It was Momo and Kaido's turn to outdrown each other.
"What happened to you last night?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?" Oishi scoffed. "Or the memory of what you did last night was so precious that both of you wouldn't like to share it with somebody else?"
"Stop it. It's not funny." Tezuka scowled. He glanced at his friends and saw them all standing around Inui who seem to be giving them instructions. He avoided Oishi's eyes after quite getting the hint of what the former fukubuchou's statement but part of it was because it reminded him of his sexual frustration which he hated — and ashamed — to think of.
Oishi looked sheepish. "Sorry."
"Actually, we talked last night." Tezuka pushed the frame of his glasses to his nose bridge.
"About what?"
Tezuka gulped his shot. He glanced away from Oishi "We clarified things up. Me, him and what we really are to each other."
"That's… good. Right?" Oishi glanced at him uncertainly.
"…Yes," The corners of Tezuka's lips curled up into a small smile. Disregarding the fact that he shed tears last night and became over-emotional that was so not like him, everything else was good. "Syusuke promised me he would come back only if I would wait and help him regain what was lost."
"At last," Oishi smiled too. "You'd be finally together again."
"Yeah." Tezuka filled his and Oishi's glass. "Little by little, though."
"It's better than nothing, right?" Oishi tipped his glass towards Tezuka. "Let's drink to that."
"Cheers." He clunked his glass with Oishi's and downed the whole thing. His eyes darted back to his former teammates. Fuji broke from the circle. He was standing across him, his eyes open and transfixed at Tezuka. Their eyes met and Fuji waved at him. The corner of Tezuka's mouth crinkled upward into a big grin. His heart beat furiously. Even if they had broken their eye contact, his smile was still etched on his face. He could simply feel that he would repossess Fuji again.
* * *
After dinner, the whole team was idling by retelling memories they had with one another. Their one-week reunion was near to end and everyone wanted to make the most out of the remaining days.
Everyone was in the living room as the storytelling went on. Tezuka, Fuji, Inui, Kawamura and Ryuzaki-sensei were seated on the couch while the others were sprawled or seated on the floor as they laugh and reminisce of the past, Eiji especially who rolled on the floor when something really funny was told. Oishi merely stroked Eiji's hair as the redhead cushioned his head on Oishi's lap. Kaido and Momo were also seated on the floor, their backs rested on one another's. Sakuno was seated at the foot or Ryuzaki-sensei with Echizen beside her. Everybody was relaxed and casual. Only one person felt somewhat out of place at the moment.
Despite knowing that reminiscing would help him recover, Fuji felt a bit uncomfortable. He chuckled when something was funny and listened intently when a serious memory was brought up. He actually learned lots of things about himself and his teammates, especially Tezuka. He discovered that Tezuka injured his shoulder to the point of almost no longer being able to play and sought medical help in Germany. He treasured everything that he learned and vowed never to forget about them. But he honestly did not feel at ease at the moment. When silence ensued after Eiji and Momo recounted the time in their junior high when Kaidoh mistakenly thought that Inui was asking him to a date (Inui's temples twitched, his fists rounded, and Kaido's face was a furious shade of tomato red) and laughed hysterically, Fuji excused himself to proceed to the kitchen to grab a drink.
That Kaido Inui slash incident was hilarious indeed but somehow, Fuji couldn't muster even a small laugh. He needed to be alone right at this moment to absorb everything he learned from the reminiscing and to alleviate the slight pain in his head from trying his hardest to remember even just a single thing from what his friends were saying. Too much thinking and trying to remember probably strained him but he could not do anything to stop himself from thinking even if those thoughts were still unclear to him. He felt empty and useless.
He got a glass and poured water in it. His throat felt dry and so he drained the contents of his glass as if the act would also drain his anxieties. Again, he felt empty and useless and also stupid.
He was like looking at a crystal orb with only white smoke and fog to look at. He couldn't decode any image no matter in which angle he look at. The smoke obscured whatever it was that he had to see. He sighed.
Fuji was a genius. Was. How could he remain a genius if he did not even fully know his self? He sighed again and closed his eyes out of frustration. If only he could clear his head…
And so, he sneaked out of the kitchen through the back door and went outside the premises of the rest house. He stood in the middle of the road. Why in the middle of the road even if it was dangerous? Fuji didn't know; he just felt like it... it just felt like it was the right place where he had to be: in the middle of nowhere. He had to clear his mind off the white smoke and fog in his crystal orb of a brain. It felt heavy, overloaded of empty words from empty memories that were just told with no primary vision of how all the events they told look like. He couldn't remember anything except—
Now, the fog seemed to diminish. Fuji's eyes fluttered open as his knees gave away and he sank down in the middle of the street.
He couldn't remember anything except Tezuka and a bit of his own family.
The kiss under the mistletoe, Tezuka and his family in the hospital, Tezuka with him everywhere, Tezuka who cried and almost begged for him to come back… almost everything was about Tezuka with a small portion of his family.
The white smoke thinned revealing just traces of what he was supposed to see in the crystal orb. Fuji stayed rooted on his spot as the smoke continued to reveal gradually his destiny.
* * *
Tezuka wondered what took Fuji too long to grab a drink. Almost fifteen minutes had passed and Fuji was not still back in the living room to hear the Golden Pair's memories, of how they became doubles partner and developed their friendship. There was a glint of happiness in Oishi and Eiji's eyes as they share their history. It was unfortunate that Fuji wasn't there to listen to this.
Tezuka straightened on his seat. He was not a worry-wart but when it came to Fuji, things were different.
He had already foreseen that Fuji might not be very comfortable of sharing memories when the tensai have nothing to share although it would be helpful for him to remember fragments of his past. Despite Fuji's eternal smiling countenance, Tezuka always knew the real emotions behind it and just a while ago, he could feel that Fuji was struggling to make sense of everything and to feel comfortable of the whole thing. When Fuji finally stood up to get some drink, he knew that it was already the limit.
"…'Til that moment, I committed myself to become Oishi's double partner and friend." Eiji said as a conclusion to his and Oishi's story.
"Wow! What a really strong bond you have!" Sakuno exclaimed, her grip tightening around Echizen's.
Oishi smiled and continued to stroke Eiji's hair gently. "Yeah… strong bond…" He mumbled and there was a moment of silence once more among the team.
Tezuka alone heard the compassionate tone in Oishi's words. It was about time for the two to face the real state of their bond, a bond similar to the one he shared with Fuji.
Fuji.
Remembering Fuji again, who wasn't back yet, he stood up to proceed to the kitchen.
Inui's eyeglasses glinted. "Where are you going, Tezuka?"
Only one name escaped from his lips, "Fuji."
With that, everybody already understood and let Tezuka went on his way.
.
Something was already making sense in the crystal orb. There was an image of a face of a person still obscured by the smoke. Fuji stood up and looked up at the sky. There were stars, more visible and vaster… unfathomable. Just like everything to him now. He couldn't comprehend most of the things because of damn amnesia. He continued to gaze at the stars and let his unclear thoughts sway his mind, engulfing him more to confusion. White smoke and fog once again dominated his crystal orb, erasing the image of the person. If only Tezuka was there right beside him. If only he could talk to Tezuka right now without feeling stupid. For some reason, Fuji could not approach him. If only Tezuka would call his name and be the one to approach him, even if it would not help him clear his head he knew it would make him more secure and comfortable.
"Syusuke,"
Fuji tore his gaze away from the sky. What was that he heard? He turned his head and saw Tezuka standing by the gates of the rest house. His eyes widened.
"Tezu…ka," He mumbled.
Out of nowhere, everything brightened as if a spotlight was blared at Fuji's direction, blinding him. He covered his eyes with his right hand.
"SYUSUKE!" Tezuka yelled, running after him.
Fuji shaded his eyes with his hand. He now finally realized that the light came from a car approaching his direction. It was only then did he realize he was standing in the middle of the road. His eyes widened in fear.
Everything seemed to be in slow motion. He turned his head and saw Tezuka running towards him. His breath was caught in his throat. No… no… He turned again, the car was fast. It swerved to the right, heading for Tezuka. No, no, NO!
"TEZUKA!!"
"SYUSUKE!" With the speed of a professional tennis player, Tezuka made it on time to reach Fuji. He wrapped his arms around the smaller man and tossed themselves to the other side of the road. The zooming car did not stop and continued without even looking back at the two persons who were almost hit.
Eyes still wide and heart hammering furiously in his chest, Fuji remained wrapped around by Tezuka's lean arms. It was like a déjà vu when last time, both of them fell on the floor because they were fighting over a camera. But now, they were both on the ground because Tezuka saved both their lives. He was still shocked at the whole thing. Tezuka's arms were still protectively wrapped around him.
"S-Syusuke?" Tezuka removed his arms around Fuji and discovered the smaller man was shaking. "Are… are you all right?"
Fuji did not respond. He wasn't seeing Tezuka. Instead, black and white events flashed in his mind. He saw a vision of himself driving, swerving sharply the car. He saw before him how his car crashed to another car. In his next vision, he was already in the hospital with his sister and mother then it jumped to a scene at home when Tezuka visited him.
"Syusuke," Tezuka called out in vain.
Next, Fuji saw Tezuka's face coming near to his face for a kiss under mistletoe… Tezuka's brief hug when their friends arrived and he was nervous to face them… Tezuka's fingers were interlaced with his under the blanket… Tezuka's topless body pressed near him… Tezuka talking to the plants… Tezuka angry at him… Tezuka kneeling before him… Tezuka slipping the ring of eternal memory in his finger… Tezuka… Tezuka… Tezuka… His visions were filled with Tezuka.
"Syusuke,"
Fuji snapped back to reality. Tezuka was shaking his shoulders; his eyes were full of fear and concern for him. "I-I'm fine."
"Thank god!" Tezuka pulled him into a tight embrace. "I was so afraid. I thought… I thought…" His voice trailed off.
Fuji's eyes swelled with tears. "Thank you. You saved me again."
Tezuka found his voice again and continued. "I-I don't know what I'll do if you… if something happened to you again. I wouldn't forgive myself. I won't let anything separate me from you again. Ever."
Fuji blinked and tears flowed. He wasn't sobbing, he was simply crying out of relief. With Tezuka's endearing, and compassionate voice, something flickered inside him. His crystal orb was finally empty of fog and smoke. He could now clearly see what it was trying to conceal. Everything now made sense. It was Tezuka in the crystal orb. Tezuka was his destiny.
Fuji pushed back to free himself from Tezuka's embrace. He was surprised to see Tezuka's eyes were moist, and Tezuka seemed to be also surprise to see Fuji's tears-stricken face.
"S-Syusuke…" Tezuka breathed.
Fuji stared intently at Tezuka's eyes, trying to communicate his every emotion. "Now I know…" He pressed lips with Tezuka's and for some time, they kissed feverishly and hungrily. Fuji finally found what he lacked while Tezuka finally had Fuji back.
Fuji broke their kiss. He continued to stare at Tezuka's amber eyes. He smiled and said, "Now I know… I love you."
RANDOM NOTES
At last, I've finally updated. Forgive me, my dear readers, forgive me. I do hope this chapter makes it up. Oh, and special thanks to Fujitachiha! ;)
As for Tezuka's sexual frustration… I know it was quite out of line to suddenly insert something like that which is a bit out of his character. But hey, he's a man too. I'm quite sure any man or anyone who is erm… kind of sexually involved with someone would want that kind of need and desire to be satisfied.
With regard to the memories of the team I've mentioned, most of them actually happened in the anime series. Like that one when Kaido thought Inui was asking him out when it was actually about Momo's dating of Tachibana An and the Golden Pair's memories. Fuji's memories of Tezuka in the latter part of this fic, on the other hand, are events that happened only in this fic. You may check them out in the previous chapters.
So again, I hope this chapter satisfied you. I do think I would be able to update this more since it would be just a few more chapters to go. Oh yeah, it's been a year since I've created this fic. Thanks for all the support! I LOVE YOU ALL!
Oh and yes.. I want to promote my other fic, KILLING TIME. It features Yukimura and Fuji slash. I know it is a non-canon pairing but don't you think they make a very, very good pair. Plus, they're both sadists! HEHE. I do hope you'll give it a chance. Watch the OVA series (specifically Ryoma and Yukimura's match) in YouTube where Yukimura was absolutely hot! Though he was kinda scary there.
Lastly, Err… I'm thinking of including a love scene. What do you think? A love scene before I totally end this… though I myself am not sure if I will be able to manage it. I want to hear from you so please don't hesitate to leave me a review. Xiao. :)