Alright! So now that everyone's good and disappointed in Eric, let's see how he bounces back. This chap. actually has a lot of crazy fun, Jason Stackhouse is always good for a laugh!
Ch. 10
Well. The damage was already done.
Eric was beyond confused. Why would Sookie be waiting for him Naked in his bedroom? Peace offering? Surely she wasn't there for Sex since her brother was just a few rooms down, right? Fuck! What if that was Exactly what she was there for?
Thalia. If there was anything Eric ever regretted in his life, it was everything Thalia! He risked taking a look at her and from the Scowl she wore, she was just about ready to slap him. Good. He deserved it and he knew it.
He wasn't exactly sure how to unfuck his current situation, but the first order of business was to remove Thalia from their home.
Eric was no stranger to kicking out women; he brushed past Thalia with absolutely no expression on his face, walking towards the front door. Yes. This strategy meant there would be witnesses to what was about to go down, but everyone had already seen Thalia walk in. Making a good first impression on Sookie's only brother was no longer a possibility, and since he had nothing to lose Eric decided to play the role of Asshole (acting wasn't really necessary, he had never felt so disappointed in himself as he did at that exact moment).
As he walked away from her she stormed right after him, her heels clacking against the floor as she stomped.
"Who the fuck was that Naked girl in your ROOM Eric?"
He cringed. Everyone had heard her, including Sookie's older brother. (Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.) The only thing Eric wanted was to somehow make her leave, and so the words left his mouth before he had time to process any repercussions.
"She's my wife."
Thalia gasped and covered her mouth with her well manicured hand.
"I think you should leave." He opened the door for her and stood back, mentally preparing for her to attack him. Oddly enough, she seemed more surprised and ashamed than enraged. Maybe it was the audience of men watching her from the living room?
It took a moment for her to sort out her emotions, but when she came to her senses, the tiny woman barreled past him, hissing out a "Bastard!" before Eric could lock the door behind her. He turned around slowly, not too thrilled to see Jason's reaction to the two minutes worth of Crazy/Drama he had invited into the apartment.
Shockingly, Jason Stackhouse was laughing as he sipped his beer. Eric could only come to one conclusion: The Guy Must Be Drunk.
"WhooooWee!" Jason cheered and set down his beer to clap. Eric froze, preparing himself for the worst. Claude seemed disinterested while Alcide glared at him, frowning disapprovingly.
"Sookie SAID you were an entertaining Sumbitch!" Jason started laughing so hard he had to hold his sides. "Ha, looks like you and me are gonna get along Just Fine!"
What. The. Fuck?
"Oh yeah, brother!" Jason walked over and slung an arm up over Eric's shoulder, leading him towards the couch, "Sookie used to give me So much shit over my Tom-Cattin' ways, but she always had some crazy backup plan to bail me out whenever the shit hit the fan! Haha, that naked scheme, 'that her idea or yours?"
"That was all her..." Eric held his hands up as though he had nothing to do with it, because honestly, he had nothing to do with it. Jason just laughed and motioned for Claude to hand Eric a beer from the small ice chest they prepared earlier.
"Silly bitch! One time, the father of one girl I was...Seeing, caught me on a date with another gal at this Diner Sookie was serving at. This guy was just about to kick my ass and then Sooks stepped in, convinced him I was her AA sponsor, just checkin' in on her to make sure she was coping OK serving alcohol to people and all. THEN she somehow got my date to go along with it! Yeah, Sook had her pretendin' to be a "youth pastor"! Fuck, I don't know how she does it, but she had that man shaking my hand and apologizing, EVEN THOUGH I HAD A BEER SITTIN' RIGHT IN FRONT 'A ME!"
Eric laughed softly and took a swig of his beer. He couldn't help but feel guilty. Jason had these crazy ideas that he and Sookie orchestrated this stuff in advance when really Eric had never felt more confused in his entire life. The fact that every time he blinked he would visualize Sookie completely naked didn't inspire much intelligent thought either. Claude nudged Eric with his foot.
"Hey, shouldn't you go check on your accomplice?" Eric shot up out of his seat and headed down the hall. Jason didn't skip a beat and continued on telling Claude and Alcide more legends of Sookie Freakin' Stackhouse (what they called her in High School).
Since Sookie hadn't emerged from Claude's room, Eric assumed she was still fairly naked. As he suspected, there was an outfit in her locker (in the bathroom) he hadn't seen her wear yet. He grabbed her clothes and hesitantly knocked on Claude's bedroom door.
That was another thing that bothered him. Why would Sookie run to Claude's room? He tried to talk himself out of feeling jealous of a homosexual stripper, but part of his brain kept nagging at him that if there was ever a woman who could turn Claude straight, it'd be Sookie "Freakin" Stackhouse. He had found it hilarious before when Claude had kissed her at the restaurant, mostly because of the shocked expression on her face, now Eric was nothing but suspicious of Claude's motives.
Sookie whipped open the door with a Panic-stricken face which contorted into confusion seeing Eric standing there. He held up her clothes and she stepped aside to let him into the room, one arm across her chest holding the towel in place.
"Eric?" she questioned as she closed the door behind him. "What happened with your date?" Eric handed her the outfit.
"She went home."
"Oh, Eric, I'm so sorr-!"
"No. Don't." She seemed hesitant and bit her bottom lip. "Honestly."
"Oh. Was she your date from last night?" So much had happened that Eric had to stop and think about what he actually did the night before. Sookie misinterpreted his pause.
"OH GOD, that's not..even..any of my business!" she trailed off.
"No, it is. And no, we never even had a date. Last night I actually slept on Pam's couch. I. I just had a lot on my mind and needed to clear my head." Sookie gave him a cute lopsided smile as she took the clothes from his hand and backed a few feet away. She motioned for him to turn around so she could dress and Eric felt a sense of de ja vu. Unfortunately, all of the mirrors in the room weren't positioned well enough for him to catch another glimpse of Sookie naked. Yes, he had just seen All of her, but God, once just couldn't be enough.
"Sookie, I don't even know how to begin to apologize to you. Just, this morning, I thought I saw something, and I got angry, and I'm sorry I broke your little stick thing. It's all so stupid because, as it turns out, I didn't really even see anything-"
"Eric, don't worry about what you thought you saw." He could hear the rustling of her clothes behind him. Sookie was blushing furiously thinking Eric was talking about "seeing" her naked.
"I just-I have no excuse for what I did." Eric shamefully hung his head wondering what possessed him to even Consider fucking Thalia. Hell, he couldn't even remember her name at first! He spent the entire time comparing her to Sookie anyway.
Sookie finished dressing and couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy. She figured she'd have felt pretty ashamed getting caught masturbating by a practical stranger too. Ten seconds of standing naked for him seemed like nothing in comparison. Sookie tiptoed over to him and placed her warm hand in the center of his back.
"Hey, there's nothing to worry about. We're even now."
Eric shook his head. They were Pretty Fucking Far from even. He had immediately assumed the worst of her when she wasn't even sleeping with Anyone! Pam was right. Sookie's absolutely Perfect. She's a beautiful, funny, and smart woman who dealt with the same fucking asshat for YEARS. She DESERVED to get laid. He was the one who needed to prove something to Her.
His chest felt as though it was caving in as he realized nothing he's done in his entire life (up to that moment) made him even close to being worthy of her. Sookie deserved someone just as Amazing as herself. He wasn't sure how to go about it, especially after ruining everything by bringing some slut into the equation, but at that very moment, Eric vowed to do whatever it'd take to make Sookie happy.
"I want you to, just...Sookie," he turned around to look at her. God, she was beautiful. Her blonde hair was down and floating around her head from the static of pulling on a new shirt. She had on a cute jean skirt that wasn't terribly short and a dark-blue long sleeved shirt. He was about to read the clever saying printed on it but noticed her nipples beneath the fabric. She wasn't wearing a bra! Why wasn't she wearing a bra with her brother visiting? He tried not to dwell on it.
Eric immediately focused back on her eyes. He had already seen Sookie naked, no sense in getting carried away envisioning himself massaging those heavy breasts, too.
Sookie didn't exactly know he was "checking her out" since she was pretty oblivious to those sorts of attentions, but she knew Eric was looking at her more closely than usual. She selfconsciously pushed her thick black frames up the bridge of her nose and smiled just from seeing Eric smile at her.
So conditions weren't perfect, but the air was Definitely Clearer between them. Maybe Claudine knew what she was talking about after all. Sookie made a mental note to follow her advice more often.
"Sookie..I want you to know, I Never slept with her." Now Sookie was confused, her eyebrows furrowed and Eric began to ramble on. "I promise, I just ran into her today, just a few minutes ago. She's not someone...you don't have to worry about seeing her again, ok?" Sookie put her hand up on his shoulder to chill him out.
"Whoa, hey, Eric! It's fine. Who you're interested in isn't really any of my business! You're a grown man, you don't have to answer to anybody."
Sookie did an excellent job of reigning in the small pang of jealously. That woman really was beautiful, very glamorous; just the kind of lady she could imagine Eric dating. The only thing she couldn't understand was Eric's current strange behavior. One second he was mad she didn't take his kisses seriously, then he tried to pretend she didn't exist, now he apologizes for HER ruining HIS Date, it was madness! She had been so sure they were making progress after she had Bared It All...and then suddenly it hit her!
She thought she had him all figured out-
"Eric," she started soothingly, "It's ok. Well, sure it's a little embarrassing, but I'm starting to get Used to strange women seeing me naked!" She started to laugh at her own joke as Eric was wracked with guilt. How could he forget the fallout with Bill? He frustratingly ran his hand through his hair and Sookie stood on her toes to catch his arm and stop him. "Really, you should invite Pam over more often, maybe she'll luck out and steal a peek like everyone else!" She giggled and winked and Eric faked a smile while his heart crumbled within him.
There was no denying it. Eric felt like the biggest douche in the world, and every time he opened his mouth to let her know how remorseful he was for ruining their chance at greatness, she'd just smile, cool as a cucumber, and tell him everything was just peachy! He knew they'd just keep going in circles if he told her again how Thalia was a mistake, so he tried to change the subject.
"So, I just met your brother. He seems pretty friendly." Sookie chuckled and took a step back, taking her hand away from his warm body.
"Well that's one way to describe him! I didn't even find out he was coming for a visit until he was departing from Louisiana last night! Gran says he jumped on a plane the minute he found out Bill and I finally split for good."
"Yeah, he thinks we're in cahoots."
"Why's that?" Eric sheepishly tucked his hands into his pockets before answering her.
"When I was kicking out Thalia earlier, at the door, she started shouting loud enough for everyone to hear. She asked who you were..." he hesitated meeting her eyes, "I told her you were my wife."
Eric swore she was going to start screaming at him, maybe lecture him about lying to women and hurting their feelings, but Sookie covered her mouth and giggled.
"Well that explains it! I swear, I've had to help talk that guy out of situations since he was Thirteen! He probably figured out I flashed you, eh?" Eric nodded uncomfortably.
"Sookie, I've gotta ask, why'd you run in here? Why didn't you run to, you know, Your room?"
"Well. Jas is staying in my room and I wasn't about to have him walk in on me naked! Then he'd start bringing up more embarrassing stories like Skinny Dipping in Sheriff Dearborn's pond when I was sixteen." Sookie mentioned it so casually but Eric was dying to know more. He'd have to ask for the full story later since they needed to get back to the rest of the gang before Jason kicked his ass for fooling around with his Naked little sister.
"So did Claude know you were going to wait naked...in my bedroom?"
"No. Oh, well, maybe? I did tell him I was going to 'Even the Score'. He's been really great since last night. Eric...listen, I don't like it when things are off between us. What I walked in on, I mean, I Understand why you left. Just- Can we? Do you think we can just have a Do-Over?"
"A do-over?"
"Yes. Eric, It's-I've been Ten Kinds of crazy lately. It's probably just all this Bill drama, Years of emotional stuff I really need to deal with, but I haven't really felt like myself! I've been so spastic and I swear, I haven't felt this lame since high school!" She laughed and pushed up her glasses. "But I think you and me? We're good together."
Eric felt an unfamiliar tightness in his chest at her words. He tried not to hope for too much knowing he was reading too much into what she was saying, but he would take whatever she was willing to give.
"I get what you're saying. I've been feeling out of sorts lately, too."
"See, so now we're Square! We're just going to put all the weird behind us! Everything. Starting fresh, because you're hilarious and I miss joking around, and, ya' know... hanging out with you." She blushed. "So now that you've seen me and I've seen you (she blushed harder than ever) we should be fine!" She paused to breathe and actually started to look relieved. "So-we should probably get back out there.."
"Hey, there she is! As I was saying, Sookie has this way with words. One year, before she started waiting tables at Merlotte's, Sook wrote out these speech assignments for classmates in exchange for cash. Christmas was right around the corner and Sookie really wanted to buy Hunter that fancy new Playstation 2, hah, anyway! I remember her persuasive speech, she had everyone believing the world was flat! Or remember the speech you wrote for Lafayette? Where you convinced everyone dinosaurs never really existed? You even dumbed down Hoyt's speech enough to where it looked like he did the work himself, Still tricked people into thinking Gold Fish crackers were actually cat food!"
Sookie laughed along at Jason's stories as she opened up a bottle of beer and set up another one for her darling brother. The beer he was working on was just about finished.
"Jas, I don't know how you remember all that stuff!"
"Pfft, how could you Forget? You banked over $200 in one week and all the kids were bragging about how every speech ya' wrote got an A!"
Sookie shook her head, chuckling as she made herself comfy against the wall across from the boys on the sectional. Eric couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from her. It was fun hearing about teenage Sookie, in fact, he wanted to know everything about Sookie.
"So Eric, these guys tell me you and I may just be Soulmates!" Eric choked and sputtered out beer.
"Come again?" Jason laughed and slapped him on the back.
"I'm a bit of a Ladies Man, myself." Sookie scoffed in her corner.
"Jason, you can't really dress up the term slut. Guys, this man gets around like a Record. I'd warn you to keep an eye on your sisters, but I suppose it's too late for that, right Claude!"
"My sister and I share similar tastes. Your brother comes highly recommended." Jason sat up a little straighter to look down on Sookie with a smug, satisfied smile. Well, at least he could take Claude's advances in stride. Back home, Lafayette sure did a good job desensitizing her once somewhat-homophobic brother.
"Maybe Claudine's memory is foggy. She couldn't even Walk out of that bar, she was so plastered!"
"What are you talking about, sis? I Happened to carry her because it was chivalrous and romantic!" Jason could barely keep a straight face and the way her eyes narrowed at him was more playful than pointed.
It was obvious to the rest of the roommates that the Stackhouse siblings were once quite close and must have missed this strange relaxed taunting of one another.
"Alright, now we've got all the roommates here, the game shall continue!"
Eric looked around confused but eventually found the deck of playing cards scattered across the coffee table. Jason pointed to his younger sister. "Sook, you should probably break out the hard stuff."
"Aw, we've been so loose with the rules already, do we really hav-"
"Well of course we do!"
Everyone smiled at the way they seemed to read one another's mind.
"Since Eric's new, I'll explain what's goin' down." Sookie begrudgingly followed her brother's orders and retreated to the kitchen to grab the fancy bottle of rum she had found stashed in cabinet the other day.
"So, we've just been playin' a lil drinkin' game to get to know one another. I've gotta make sure I know the men in my baby sister's life after all!"
"Jason..." Sookie growled at him from the kitchen. Jason shifted forward to whisper to the guys.
"Doesn't really matter. Honestly, anyone is better than Boring as Balls, Bill Compton." The guys all grunted out in agreement as Sookie came back into the room with the booze. She eyed everyone suspiciously as she kneeled across from her brother at the coffee table.
"What are y'all whispering about?" Jason shrugged innocently as he shuffled the deck of playing cards.
"I was apologizing to your friend Eric on your behalf. Just because he was blessed with the same God-Given abilities of pickin' up women as I do doesn't mean you get to harp on this poor boy and call him names like slut."
"Oh, I didn't rope him in with the likes of You! Eric here has Standards, you, Jason Stackhouse, You are the reason Gran can't miss a single Sunday of Church!"
"Hey, I have standards!" Sookie raised her eyebrows in challenge.
"Maudette Pickens?" Jason rubbed the back of his head guiltily. After losing that argument he turned his attention back to the game.
"As I was saying, Eric, we've just been playin' a friendly Drinking Game That Has No Name! Alcide here is probably going to profit the most out of the experience! You'll know so much about Sookie, you kids will be able to pull off a fake relationship for that Weddin' in your sleep!"
Eric scowled, something that didn't go unnoticed by Jason Stackhouse.
"Well it goes as such, we each draw a card, and at the same time, we reveal our card to the other players by slapping it to our foreheads! Person with the lowest value card drinks from their drink and shares an embarrassing story or fond memory of their past.
Now that's all simple enough, but there are loopholes and exceptions that Really make the game fun! IF, a person draws the lowest card three times in a row, they have to take a shot of this here Captain Morgan to "exercise their demons" and they still have to share with the class. They take a shot from then-on-out until their luck changes and someone else draws a shit card.
Now sometimes it's hard to think of anything good from your past, this is where you can elect to "Throw 'em Under the Bus". You drink some beer, as does the player that you have an embarrassing story of. Game Commissioner, who we've decided shall be Claude for the evening (Claude bowed), decides with a thumbs up or down whether the person thrown under the bus is to take a shot or not, based on the story. I plan to throw Sook under the bus every card I get! You still with me so far?" Eric nodded.
"The final rule is the "1up Rule". After the story has been told, and you have a Better story, which is related to the one you just heard, you can tell yours. If you manage to one up the other story, the original story teller takes a shot! If your story falls short You take the shot.
Now let's get started, you learn the ropes as you play!"
Everyone drew a card and after a second slapped it to their heads. Fingers were pointed but Sookie lost with a 3 of hearts. She sipped a decent amount if her beer as she thought about what to share with everyone.
"Once upon a time, I was taking a course at LSU, they had us do this quick project where we wrote down the top 5 things we look for in the opposite sex," Eric almost wished he could take notes.
"So after we finished our lists, we were split into groups of the Same sex to decide as a group what would be the top 5 things wanted in the opposite sex.
The MINUTE we sat down, this cunt beside me jumps in with "Number 1 will be Financial Security, because that is the Most important thing!" No, "Hi, how are ya?" just- Financial Security. Bam!
Well, the rest of the girls were silent, so "I" coughed out a *cough*GOLD DIGGER*cough*!
So now this bitch was Furious with me, so she RIPS my paper from my hands and says "Yea? Well let's see what YOU wrote!" So before I can stop her, she reads out my number one answer..."
Eric was on the edge of his seat.
"Protects me from BEES?" Everyone laughed and Sook took another sip of beer to take the edge off.
They had sort of been playing the game for a while now, and it was pretty entertaining, but now that Eric was participating her heart was racing. She crossed her fingers hoping he wouldn't tell the group any stories about her terrible kissing skills or her bikini wax he had recently seen!
"Well I sure as shit can't 1up that one, draw again!" Everyone drew new cards and Sookie lost again.
"Alright, this time I choose to throw my darling brother under the bus!" Claude prepared a shot of spiced rum and Jason held his hands up, wiggling his fingers as if to say 'bring it on'.
"When Jas and I were in middle school, our neighbors across the cemetery, the lovely Compton's, purchased a CHIHUAHUA dog as a pet. Anyway, this stupid ass dog was named Chico -the racists.
So Chico was the most annoying little shit! He would come to Gran's property, pee on her tires, yap like crazy at my cat, Tina, and worst of all, take a chihuahua dump right at the front door! It'd get stuck on the screen door and everything!
So one afternoon, Jason and I were pretending to be ninjas in the front yard with ninja stars and our new blow-gun. Well, Chico started walking around our yard like he owned the place, so Jas took out the real dart from the blowgun and put in a stun dart. The stun darts are plastic outside but have a small metal BB inside, so if you get shot with it, it'll leave a mean welt.
So right as Chico raises a leg to pee on Gran's front tire, Jay closes one eye, takes aim at Bill's dog's stomach, takes a deep breathe and shoots! It starts flying towards the dog, but he's a good distance away so the dart starts to lose altitude! PAP! Right in the Dick! Jason shot him right in the Chihuahua penis!"
Even Sookie was laughing at her own story! Jason drank his shot and slammed the small glass on the coffee table.
"Ya'll should be takin' shots in my honor! Chihuahua dick-shots are IMPRESSIVE! Do you know how small a target that was?"
After the laughter died down they revealed their cards again. Sookie lost for the third time in a row.
"Ahgk! Are you kidding me?" She didn't even wait for someone to pour her a shot, she took a swig straight from the bottle, wincing and shivering as it went down.
Eric tried to look away after realizing he had been staring at her the entire night. He was glad Sookie kept drawing the worst cards, at least it gave him the chance to hear more about her and where she grew up.
"Alright, do a YOU story, sis! No more throwin' me under the bus! Besides, don't you guys wanna hear more stories about Sookie?"
"YES!" Sookie smiled at their collective 'yes', it was even cuter than seeing her students shout an answer at the same time. She washed away the taste of rum with her beer thinking of a fun story.
"Our high school used to host a Career Day, so my best friend Tara and I crashed the class about Massage Therapy. We goofed off most of the time but the MT was impressed with our work, or something? So we were picked to spend a day job shadowing a real massage therapist. Of course we said yes because we'd get out of an entire day of school!
So there we were, about 5 er 6 of us girls at some weird hippie retreat to massage and get massaged. First off, the masseuse we met was honest to God, CRAZY. She was wearing a LABCOAT, her kinky red hair was All Over the place, her lipstick was smeared, honestly, it looked like she was hopped up on Pet-meds.
So the crazy lady asks us if there is any part of the body we are uncomfortable massaging before we begin. Naturally, I had to say something obnoxious. "Theee VaaGinaaa" (said in a stupid accent), so crazy-face turns around and shouts "WHAT WAS THAT?"
So Tara, the sweet girl that she is, covers for me saying "FEET! I can't STAND touchin' Feet!"
About half an hour later, the first client shows up. She's this weird housewife type woman wearin a JLo brand sweat suit and flip-flops. So the massage therapist asks "Who here didn't like massaging feet?"
Right away I point to Tara, waiting to see how hilarious it'll all play out! Tara starts shaking her head saying, "Not me! I LOOOOVE feet!"
So JLo kicks off her sandals and reveals the dirtiest, mangled feet and toes I've ever seen! So they DRAG Tara to these nasty feet and make her get into every nook and cranny. I swear I've never seen a black girl turn so white in all my life!
Then as soon as she's done, I'm just standing there laughing, Tara started rubbing her hands all over my face! She got it in my mouth!"
All the guys were laughing, but Claude slid a shot glass of rum her way.
"Well, although it was Very Entertaining, an awful lot of your story was more Tara than Sookie."
Instead of arguing, Sookie mumbled an apology and threw back the shot like a champ.
Cards were drawn and Sookie prayed for a face card. This time CLAUDE lost and Sookie stuck her tongue out at him childishly, the rum and beer was beginning to take effect.
"Once upon a time..." Claude stood up and began to gesture wildly to his audience, "during our wild and crazy college days, my friend Eric here invited me to a party at cousin Pam's place. I was hesitant to go, because I've seen the way girls get around Eric at parties, and I was SO sure he'd ditch me and I'd be stuck trying to converse with ditzy girls with nothing interesting to say."
Sookie let out a "WhoopWHOOP" and clinked glasses with her brother. Claude continued.
"But Eric was the perfect roommate and drank whatever I handed to him. Now Eric isn't a small man, there isn't any part of Eric that's small (Sookie snorted through her nose), and with all that muscle mass it takes a lot before he can work up a good buzz. I never gave up though, and before long, this asshole was completely shit-faced drunk!"
So we're playing beer pong, and I look over, I don't know WHERE he found them but Eric is just SNARFING Down these bratwursts! Not just that, he's dipping these cold brats in a jar of cheese dip. I don't know how he did it, but somehow he got that giant fucking hand of his completely lodged in this jar! AND WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF A FUCKING GAME TOO!
So I yell at him "GET CHO HANDS OUTTA THAT CHEESE!" and Eric freezes, shoulder's up, this priceless look on his face like a child caught with his hand in the cheese jar! Haha, so he finally squeezes his banana hand outta the jar, it's completely covered in liquid cheese and he grabs a pong ball and takes aim!
Right away the girls we're playing start freaking out about getting cheese in their beer, so I kick his ass towards the bathroom and he agrees that yes, he probably should wash off all the cheese. He came back good to go, so I didn't think anything of it.
Eric coughed and clutched his chest, laughing because he Just remembered how stupid they were back in college. The Stackhouse siblings could sense his anxiety and leaned closer towards Claude, waiting for the story to get good.
I get a call from Pam the next morning. She said she was hungover and walked into her bathroom and there was just a cheese massacre! I guess it started with the light switch, then a giant STREAK of cheese across the wall, all the way to her perfect white towels now turned brown, except for the spices in the cheese dip, all hardened and gross! Haha, she never could get those towels back to their original color!"
Everyone laughed and Eric scratched the back of his head.
"She still has those towels, makes me use them whenever I stay the night at her new place."
"Another!" Sookie cheered as she grabbed a card and put it to her head. It was facing the wrong direction so Eric leaned over and flipped it for her. Finally Alcide drew the losing card.
It was then that Eric realized his friend had been particularly quiet for too much of the game. He would laugh at all the stories, yes, but he wasn't his usual chatty self. Eric quirked an eyebrow to him and tilted his head as if to ask "What's wrong bro?". Alcide shrugged and sipped from his beer.
"I'm sorry, I just don't think I'm as funny as ya'll are. This game was much easier earlier when it was just simple stuff, like first time touching a breast and who's your favorite super hero..." It irked Eric not knowing who Sookie's favorite super hero was...and if she touched another womans breasts...
"Aw, you're just overthinkin' things!" Jason Stackhouse clapped a hand over Alcide's broad shoulder. "You probably have a million funny stories about yourself, you probably just consider them more embarrassing than funny! Tell ya what, Sookie'll go first, take a topic we all can relate to, then You just think of a story, even if it's not Great! AND she'll drink her shot, no matter how boring your story is!"
"Yeah! Come on Alcide!" Sookie encouraged, hoisting her beer bottle into the air. "I'll go easy, let's see. What's a good one, an easy one we all laugh at?" Eric zeroed in on her lip she was tugging through her teeth. She had such a beautiful mouth.
"Oo, talk about farts!"
"Jason Stackhouse! Haha, that would be funny though. I tell ya' what, I got a story about pee, Alcide must have peed at one time or another!"
Jason poured himself a shot of rum while he laughed and nodded in agreement. Eric popped his questioning eyebrow and Jas shrugged. "What? I'm thirsty!"
"Alright Alcide. On my graduation night it was raining cats and dogs. My friend Tara and I rode to our friends party and drank heavily, as most graduates do. Somehow in the evening, I ended up wearing a child's play army helmet and Tara lost her phone and glasses. THEN, I get a phonecall to go to another party being held at the One hotel in Bon Temps.
Right away I said "no thanks", it was raining, my car was parked a couple blocks away. I was having a good time where I was, thank you! Anyway, they all called again and made Tara get on the line. Apparently, someone had life changing news for me and Tara, being such a hopeless romantic drags me into the streets to walk back to my car so we can drive to this hotel party.
It had stopped raining, but the roads were still muddy and all. So there we were, fancy Graduation dresses, my white high heels and army helmet and we're walking in the mud to go back to my car! That's when I get the urge to Pee.
We still had a block to go and my bladder was about to burst! Tara, who was probably more drunk than myself points to the yard behind me and tells me to pee behind this giant rosebush.
Now I don't normally go running around peeing in people's front yards, but this was an emergency! So I ran over in my muddy high heels, adjust my fancy graduation dress, and just as I get down to business, a sensor light goes off illuminating the whole front yard, and there i am -exposed- right in front of their living room window!
Then Tara, my best friend, THE SELLOUT, laughs like a maniac as she runs down the street, just leaving me there!"
Sookie drank happily as she basked in her roommates laughter. She was surrounded by beautiful men and they all just seemed so happy! It was strange how normally she'd die of embarassment sharing these stories from her past, but she was completely at ease with the men around her, Even Eric!
By all accounts, she had every reason to be weird and standoffish when it came down to Eric Northman. Even after her embarassing flasher moment earlier, she still found herself watching him throughout the drinking game. She'd forget how to breathe whenever their eyes would meet, but there was just something about the look on his face. After each story he would just stare at her with...Admiration?
Bill couldn't be more opposite than Eric. He had never appreciated Sookie's sense of humor and probably would have scolded her on her unladylike behavior that night. Sookie cherished every embarrassing adventure with Tara! She took another drink thinking about their big fallout two years ago (over Bill Compton) and promised herself to make things right again.
Tara would love the guys, she just knew it. They were always up for a good time and didn't take themselves too seriously (most of the time), just like her oldest friend.
Jason was laughing harder than he did the first time he had heard the graduation story, but Sookie figured he was just happy to be around her (and laughing) again. The last time he had visited was horribly unpleasant because of Bill, go figure... Those few times they could stand to be in the same room with one another were spent arguing over what would be best for Sookie, as if she were a child!
Jason, almost reading Sookie's thoughts, reached for her hand. At first she thought he would hold her hand sweetly, instead he gripped it, lifted it, and began a secret handshake Sookie hadn't used in years! It was fairly simple but had a lot of stylish moves, like blowing on pretend dice and Rollin' em back into another quick shake until their thumbs and index fingers pushed together to create a "Snap"!
She had really missed Jason.
"Alright Alcide, now you've gotta have a Pee story from sometime in your life! Maybe you had an accident in gradeschool?"
Alcide wouldn't make eyecontact with anyone and was fidgeting in his seat.
"Come on, Shugga..." Sookie batted her long eyelashes at him, "Now how am I supposed to pretend to be your new flame when you're practically a stranger to me?" Her accent was in full-swing.
"Sookie, it's not like any of these stories are gonna come up at the wedding! I'm not planning on throwing it out there that you peed in someone's front yard!"
"Well, at least we'd be able to make inside jokes out of em, and I say the game is Plenty Useful! Are you trying to say you won't protect me if a bee flies by during the ceremony?"
Sookie began to pout as she stared up at him with her big innocent eyes.
"Well of course I would, cher! Hell, I'd of probably done that even before I heard your story!" Jason Stackhouse began to bat his eyelashes flirtatiously to Alcide while Eric chugged the rest of his beer in a sad attempt of drowning his woes.
"My kind'a Man, mmmm!" Jason stood up and maneuvered around the sectional to take a seat next to Alcide Herveaux (Kudos Lafayette!). He practically sat in the man's lap and Alcide cleared his throat, uncomfortable with Jason's level of bromancy.
"I suppose I do have a urination story, sort of." Sookie and Jason cheered enthusiastically. "One time, during college, Debbie and I were on a break. Well, one thing led to another and I ended up drunk and flirting with this Coed at some bar. She starts telling me how bad she wants me and suggests I follow her back to her place in my truck.
So this girl tells me to meet her in the basement, which apparently is her bedroom. She starts arguing with her roommates upstairs. Those girls were telling her not to hook up with me, so I was just walking around that basement real annoyed-like, AND, I Really needed to take a piss!
There was no bathroom down there but there WAS a kitty litter box in the corner..." Jason began to laugh hysterically, and from the look on Alcide's face, the story didn't end there.
"I had no idea I had to pee THAT bad, but I literally flooded that litter box. Anyway, she came down and we ended up having weird, drunk-person sex before I passed out.
The next MORNING, I wake up to the sounds of this cat HOWLING in my face. Never heard a cat meow that loud in my life. Somehow the girl slept through it, but the cat started to burrow into the blanket that was covering up our naked assess. I was barely waking up, I had No Idea what was going on, and before I have a chance to even wake the girl up, her cat shits on her bed! Right in the blankets!"
"Fuck! Looks like I'll be taking that shot now!"
Eric continued to laugh as he poured the rum then handed the full shot to Sookie. Their fingers touched and rum sloshed over their hands and all over the coffee table between them. Eric hesitated meeting her beautiful eyes, but Sookie just smiled and swallowed the liquid with minimal wincing. Eric couldn't quite break their eyecontact as he slowly sucked the rum off his fingers into his mouth. Typical Sookie, she blushed and bit down on her bottom lip.
"Oh, I wasn't finished. That girl was out like a light so I just left her sleeping in a cat shit bed. I could see the litter box in the corner as I left, and the entire box looked like it had cemented into a giant grey brick!"
"ALCIDE! HAHA, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID ALL THAT!" Alc shrugged and looked away while everyone cracked up. Jason laughed so hard he collapsed to the floor gasping for air. Sookie had never seen a full grown man like Alcide blush that hard before. He was as red as a tomato!
Claude poured another shot for Sookie, this time she actually pouted for their sympathy but Jason began to chant "Drink, Drink, Drink!", so she had no choice but to choke down the vile spicy fluid.
"Blehk! Why didn't we play this game with Whiskey?" Sookie leaned back, resting her weight on her hands. She started to hum to herself, flexing her ankles back and forth, flicking her feet daintily.
Good Lord, she was a cute drunk.
Alcide was obviously feeling more confident after hearing the feedback from the group. He was the First to draw a card for the next round. Sookie lost.
"Eric, beer me." As the Viking retrieved her beverage Sookie puffed out her cheeks thinking of something embarrassing from her past. The alcohol sure wasn't helping in the memory department. Alcide had her wait until he came back from peeing to tell her story. He didn't want to miss anything.
Once she decided and Alcide returned from the bathroom, she took a few gulps of amber golden goodness and whispered "Maudette Pickens" to Jason, shaking her head in disappointment. Jason chucked the cap from the top of his newest beer at her.
"My senior year of high school, I took a few dual credit courses to give me a leg up for college. The class was pretty small, was mostly all the same kids I saw in all my honors classes during the day." The guys began to tease her quietly with "ooo, honors classes!", but quietly enough to not interrupt the tale.
"Anyway, our instructor, Ms. Pickens, one of those OLDER ladies that dresses far too young for her age, AND SIZE?" Jason cringed. "Well she positioned all our desks into a giant 'U' shape, so you had a good look at everybody in the room, and she'd always be front and center of everyone's eyes.
So one fateful week, I had been staying over with a friend of mine's for a few days since Gran was outta town with the Descendants of the Glorious Dead group. (The guys raised eyebrows in question, but Sookie didn't stop to elaborate)
So we were running late for class, I just threw on my Jeans from the night before and we headed out!
Now, all throughout this class I felt something bothering me, like, bunched up in my pant-leg! So finally I kicked it free, big mistake. I kicked my dirty Panties from the day before directly to the center of the room! Bright orange thong, right where everyone could see!"
Laughter. Jason and Claude took a shot of rum together singing their "FRIENDS FOREVER" toast they developed the night before.
Everyone grabbed another card, Alcide actually switched cards with Jason before they revealed them via forehead. It wasn't necessary. Sookie lost AGAIN.
"FUCK MY LUCK!" Sookie finished another beer. She could drink pretty well for a girl.
"Alright, alright, I got one. YEARS ago, I bought Hunter a German Shepherd puppy for his birthday. We named Gambit. I was trying REAL hard to potty train that Mutha, so it was, like, 4 in the morning, freezing outside and i'm walking this damn dog trying to get it to do it's thing. Finally, it went and I hurried us back inside a' Grans' Farmhouse!
I threw Gambit the treat, but he was being a little BITCH and refused to eat it!" Drunk Sookie had a mouth on her! Sook took another sip of beer, probably didn't help the situation... "So he just left this treat on the floor, and THEN-I looked UP!
There, scaling the wall, was the GODZILLA of all COCKROACHES! I've never seen one that big, especially at Gran's place! I ain't a fan of Roaches, and HUGE ones haunt my DREAMS! They FLY, did you know that?" She stared into Eric's eyes, asking him honestly. He smirked and nodded that he did, in Fact, know they could Fly.
"Right, so It had to die, obviously. Problem was, Gran's kitchen had SUPER-duper tall ceilings and this Bad-Boy was wayy too high outta my REACH! So I carefully formulated my plan..." Sookie put her hands together and touched her fingertips together evilly.
"I grabbed Gambo's tennis ball and a big-ass can of RAID. See, I'm the mutha fuckin' Jenna Jameson of Pong Stars in Renard Parish, so I was pretty damn confident I'd be able to nail a Foot long Cockroach with a tennis ball! After I murdalized him with the ball, I planned to spray enough Raid his legs would melt off!
Now I don't know HOW, but that Sumbitch KNEW, he just KNEW I had it out for him, and Right as I Cocked Back my Arm to peg him with the ball, the asshole started CHARGING ME down Gran's wall, like, runnin FULL SPEED!
I PANICKED! He threw off my plan! But suddenly he was within Range, so I jumped forward and fuckin' sprayed the FUCK outta that Roach! I sprayed so much Bug Killer that there was just this layer of White Foam Raid on the wall, couldn't even see the mega-cockroach beneath it! And THEN...It fell.
I SCREAMED like a little Bitch!"
The guys started laughing hysterically. Sookie was wasted and jumping all around the living room in panic/excitement, she was a damn good story teller, even when she was drunk.
"I didn't know where it landed! He fell behind gran's fridge, and I was BAREFOOT! He coulda come from outta anywhere and attacked me back for attempted murder! You never know! And then JASON somehow materialized in the kitchen." Everyone turned to Jason who was beet red and cough-laughing. He finally caught his breath enough to join in the story.
"I just heard SCREAMING, and Sookie doesn't scream! She's strong as shit! Sometimes you'll get a grunt-scream, but not shrieking, like a girl! I ran into that kitchen before my eyes even adjusted, and there was Sookie, fuckin' standing barefoot and in her underwear, a dog curled up shaking in the corner, and when I saw the big can of raid in her hands..just walked away laughing."
"Yeah! Way to help, brother! Then, the bug didn't show it's ugly face for a while, so I slowly started backing towards my room.. then my FOOT touched SOMETHING small and I SCREAMED all over again! It was just Gambit's damn treat he left on the floor! That poor puppy was so shaken up, thought I was SCREAMING at him!
I felt terrible so I let him sleep in my bed... Screwed up on that agenda, that damn dog STILL thinks he can sneak in my bed and not get kicked out!"
"Can't say I blame him..." Alcide mumbled under his breath. Claude kicked him, not too subtle.
"AGAIN!" Jason grabbed for his next card. "I predict...Sookie goes again!" She stuck her tongue out at her brother. Eric drew a losing 4.
"Er-ic, Er-ic, Er-ic, Er-ic!"
"Bout time you lost, Northman!" He took a long sip from his beer, smirking at Miss Sookie Stackhouse as he thought of a story that could be even half as funny as some of the things Sookie had experienced.
"-Not the greatest story teller around," Alcide reached over to clink his beer with Eric's, "but back during highschool, I participated in a few slightly illegal pranks. You see, I'm a huge fan of futbol, or soccer? Yes, you people call it soccer."
"Whaddaya Mean, You people?" Jason instigated. Eric grinned, fully prepared to rile him up.
"You know...Rednecks?" Jason jumped up, still smiling but pretending to be affronted. Eric stood up too, ready for anything crazy-ass Jason Stackhouse was willing to dish out.
"Boyyy, sounds like you gots some learnin' to be had!" Jason pushed his sleeve up his bicep and Eric took a step towards the shorter man, easily towing over him. The tall viking contemplated suggesting how his Baby-Sister, an educator, could teach him a thing or two...
Sookie saw the men square off in front of her and let out an unusual "Eep!" as she clambered to her feet, then carefully stood on the wobbly coffee table. She took a step closer to the dueling blondes and held her arms out to the side for balance.
"Woah Woah Woah! Let's tone it down a notch! I can't have my boys fighting, now can I? HELL, we were all getting along 10 seconds ago! C'mon, let's just get back to the game, please? Please guys? Please?" Jason tried his hardest to fight his emerging smile.
Jason Stackhouse was no slouch when it came to picking fights, and that always came natural whenever he was in close proximity to one William Compton. Never -never- had he seen Sookie jump in to put an end to an argument between he and Bill, and maybe it was the alcohol talking, but suddenly Sookie was jumping on tables to keep the peace between him and Eric. The fact that he and the Swede were only horsing around only Confirmed his suspicions...
Eric and Jason sat back down, hesitantly. They were grinning like fools, but Sookie was far too drunk to notice.
She still gave Jason the hairy eyeball before virtually swan-diving in between the two seated blondes. There wasn't much space between them, so Sookie ended up on both laps before Jason chuckled and moved over just enough for her to slide off of him. Eric never complained about her invasion of space.
Their fake fight was in "bad form" and was therefore considered a party foul. Both Eric and Jason agreed to the rum shots assigned to them by the game commissioner.
"So, as you were Saying, something about futbol," Sookie then turned to sneer at her brother, "the game where you kick a ball with your foot..."
"Yes, my brother and I played futbol in high school."
"YOU HAVE A BROTHER?" Eric was throughly enjoying himself. Sookie was so surprised to hear there was more than one Northman,
"Pretty sure that wasn't the end of the story, Sook." Alcide grumbled out as Miss Stackhouse bowed her head (while blushing profusely) respectfully nodding for Eric to continue.
"Yes, well, Henrik and I played on the same team, of course, and we had a healthy rivalry between ours and another school.
We beat them almost every match, but they were sore losers. We couldn't prove it at the time, but they slashed my brothers tires." Sookie gasped, her eyes wide with horror! Eric smiled sweetly at her drunken-overreaction. He reached towards her face, rubbed his thumb over the worried wrinkle in her brow and continued.
"Oh we retaliated. Henrik stole their captain's girlfriend and I sent the goalie's mother flowers. After the personal attacks, they targeted our school. Lots of graffiti. So we needed to prank them Back...
Their mascot was a dragon, so in the center if their courtyard stood a giant metal dragon. That night, Henrik and I snuck into their school with grandfather's tools and blow-torch and welded a giant metal penis onto their giant metal dragon."
Jason spit out his beer and the rest of the gang rolled onto one another, howling with laughter. Alcide got up to "drain the lizard" and Somehow Sookie ended up laying with her head on Eric's lap and her feet on Jason's, getting a light foot-rub no less!
"Well. Never get this girl started on PRANKS.. " Eric quirked his eyebrow at Jason.
"Oh?"
"Yes. This is the most creative bitch you'll ever meet!" Jason threw her foot down unceremoniously (back into his lap). "Yeah, I've lost a few prank-wars to her over the years. Her timing is incredible, she always gets ya when you would never see it coming!"
"Yep. I'm the Prank KING!" Sookie smiled to herself, her eyes closed as Eric ran his fingers through her hair (something everyone saw yet no one mentioned out loud).
"Don't you mean Prank Queen?"
"No honey," Jason stared Claude dead in the eyes, "She's the King!"
"Give us an example," Alcide requested as he took a seat next to Claude, fresh beer in hand.
"Well, I was an accomplice during this prank so I'm sure I'll be able to tell it better than this lightweight, here." Jason picked up her foot and dropped it for emphasis.
"Hey!"
"Besides," Jason cut her off, "there's a few circumstances I should probably come clean about.."
"Like what?" Sookie asked as she sat up a bit from her giant Eric pillow. Jason just shrugged and began his tale.
"Long long time ago, Sook and I were gracing the halls of Bon Temps high school, though we ran in completely different circles, of course."
"Oh, of course!" Sookie gestured wildly with her arms, her head safely placed in Eric's lap.
"Don't be like that, everyone still knew your name!"
"Only because my graduating class barely had 40 students, bedsides, my name might as well have been "Jason's little sister"!"
"Right, so me and Jason's little sister -" Sookie ax kicked Jason's lap, "we pulled this hilarious prank on this guy I played football with."
"Why, what'd he do to you, er, to Sookie?
"Nothing, really." Sookie shrugged, Eric felt it. "His name was J.B. DuRone. He was one of the most popular guys at our school, So so stupid, but easy on the eyes."
"They always are..." Claude added whistfully. Sookie giggled.
"I was harboring a crush of massive proportions! We were sophomores and he had told all of his friends this big scheme to get into my pants!"
Jason had wanted to tell this story, but Sookie was already carried away, what with the booze and sentimentality of it all.
"He was supposed to wait until Drivers Ed, tell me how long he had liked me and never had the balls to let me know, and THEN, planned to invite me over for a "Movie". Ugh, can you believe that guy?"
"Um, a movie invite? Yes, what a douche, inviting you to view a film!" Claude didn't get to enjoy his joke for long before Sookie nailed him in the face with a throw pillow that had previously been lodged under her shoulder.
"No no, it was his foolproof technique! He had already tried it out twice, once on Portia Bellfleur and another time with this upperclassman, Amy something or other..."
"Amy Burley." Jason added out of the blue.
"Rrright. So word on the street was, he'd invite 'em over, let them pick a movie out of his dad's huge DVD collection, and after a few moves, they'd head home hymen-free!
Well, I heard the entire thing, practically saw the blueprints, all Home-Alone style, with the paint cans and Hot Wheels? So Drivers Ed rolled around, and NOTHING! I had so many things planned to say to that Bastard, because I am a Lady, ya know? Apparently, I wasn't even worth his Joke Lay! Somehow, I think that hurt worse. As I was leaving that class, I overheard him asking Selah Pumphrey out to dinner then a movie at his place later.. I was crushed!" Sookie dramatically rested the back of her hand to her forehead and sighed.
"So I tricked Jason into helping me out. We snuck in through his window with a bunch of blank burnable DVDs and some Sharpies, replaced EVERY DVD we could with a blank one and renamed the title to something Similar, but Porn-sounding."
"Haha, and I always Knew you were creative Sook, but those titles? Phew! And you could just rename them like That! Didn't even have to think about 'em first!" Sookie started laughing and covered her face with her hands.
"What titles did you rename?"
"Shi'it, so many! Ya know, some were real easy to alter, like "men in blacks" or "Moulin Splooge", but the Kicker was the movie that dumb bitch actually picked out to watch, hahaha! "The DaVinci Load", Sook even drew the XXX on the disc!"
The guys all laughed, drinking from their beers and shaking their heads.
"You got a few good ones too, Jas. Ha, come on, Pulp Friction? You even got his Disney movies! Loin King!"
"Haha, yep. But I think it's time I came clean, Sook. J.B. was really in love with ya." Sookie laughed/scoffed and it came out as a "Pffvt!". "No, seriously. I'm not sure what Preston and the boys told you, but he was going to tell you how he had been in love with you for years."
"Jason, I know you guys have become friends over the years but you Really don't have to cover for him!" Jason set his beer down and eyed Sookie seriously.
"What? Now that you guys are drinkin buddies at Merlotte's, you're feeling guilty about the Movie Prank!" Sookie was sitting up now, the comfort of Eric's fingers stroking her scalp completely forgotten.
"We had always been friends, Sook. Football, Football camp, hell, Stackhouse and DuRone go all the way back to black eyes on the playground!"
"You mean knocked out teeth..." Sookie grumbled.
"Look, the point is, yes, J.B. was gonna confess his feelings for ya. And..I'm the reason he never breathed a word if it to you. We had, a TALK." Drunk-Sookie gasped. "Sook, we both know he was Dumber than a box of hair! The guy's all foam, no beer. He's a good friend, just not good enough for My baby sister! You woulda tired of him anyhow!"
"Maybe, maybe not Jas! Woulda been nice to let me make up My Own mind about a guy, though!" Sookie huffed and crossed her arms over her chest.
Eric hated this J.B. character immensely. He didn't have to grow up with the Stackhouse's to know that "having a little talk" with Jason wouldn't be enough to keep him away from someone as great as Sookie.
Alcide could sort of understand. It's not like he spent his every waking hour with Sookie, but it was still clear she was out of his league intellectually. Luckily, she was raised right, and always kept things light depending on the present company. He had never seen her treat anyone with disrespect, except for maybe Bill.
Claude jumped out of his seat making a mad dash down the hall, temporarily stunning the angry crowd into silence. He emerged grinning like a fool and waving a nice bottle of vodka in the air. Claude wasted no time in pouring a shot for both Jason and Sookie.
"I don't know what I'm so upset about. It's not like I'd want to be with someone who would Cave so easily, ya know?" Eric raised his beer and nodded his head in agreement.
She knew Jason was right about him too. She always had a lot of fun with JB, they'd joke and hang out, but she spent a lot of her time explaining her jokes to him... It definitely wouldn't have lasted, but it still made her feel warm and fuzzy inside knowing she sort of had OPTIONS back then. Bill used to love rubbing it in (all the time) that he was the only one REMOTELY interested in her during highschool, and now Jason had proved him wrong!
"Yeah Sook, and honestly, I was only gung-ho for the prank because I had a thing for Amy. Couldn't let the guy slide for stealing That Cherry, friend or not!" Sookie made a disgusted "blehk" noise before consuming the vodka.
"Well there's another thing, Jas! If he was Soo in love with me, how could he do all these other girls?"
"Well that's easy," Jason shrugged. Sookie raised her eyebrows waiting for him to explain. "Practice."
"Are you serious?" As if it were the most normal thing in the world. Practice? The rest of the guys seemed to mumble/grunt in agreement with Jason.
In a brotherly fashion, he reached over and rubbed the top of her head wildly, tangling up her blonde hair. She couldn't help but smile.
Eric caught himself staring for the millionth time and forced himself to look at the empty bottle in his hands. He knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, there was no other woman in the world like Sookie Stackhouse.
The women Eric was used to would bitch incessantly if even a single hair was out of place, and then there's Sookie...Her hair just got completely effed up and she was smiling about it! How could he not fall in love with her?
Eric felt a cold shiver run through his body. Love?
It wasn't like he didn't believe in the Idea of love. He had seen it all first hand, watching the way his father would look at his mother all those many years ago. But his feelings for Sookie were completely unexpected. They hardly knew each other. Eric tried to reevaluate things, but there was no denying it, he was head over heels for the girl! Every moment with her was just one surprise after another.
Just because he had an epiphany and knew exactly how felt about Sookie Stackhouse didn't make things easier for him. He still didn't deserve her and their friendship was already on shaky ground.
The rest of the guys got up to stretch, eat, piss, etc., but Eric watched Sookie as she stood, stumbled a bit, righted herself and made a beeline for the television. Eric tried to hide the disappointment of seeing her kneel down in front of their electronics instead of bending over in front of it. Come on, she was wearing a skirt! He'd kill a man for that kind of view.
Sookie squealed with delight after adjusting something in front of her and mumbled something like 'hope it's not scratched" before music started to play. She cranked up the volume and spun around/stood all at once, like a graceful dancer.
The music sounded very European, sort of like gypsy music? Sookie sang along, dancing towards the coffee table, and snagging the bottle of vodka.
She danced her way to Jason who also happened to know the words (a song suggesting one should start wearing purple, wearing purple) and they danced around and spun around, languidly, taking turns sipping from the bottle of Vodka. Claude joined in on the dancing, clapping in gypsy fashion, while Alcide opened another beer to sip, just enjoying all the craziness around him. He might be anti-dancing, but he was thoroughly entertained.
Eric, also swept up in the music, revealed A hidden bottle of wine in the kitchen and Sookie swore that one day she'd find all their secret stashes of goods, including their batcave of porn.
With all of the swinging of elbows, shots of vodka, and numerous glasses of wine, Eric didn't really notice he was drunk until he asked what the name of the gypsy band was. Sookie and Jason shouted out "Gogol Bordello" over and over, but gave up after Eric drunkenly repeated "Gargoyle Armadillo?"
The "get to knew you" game was long forgotten and Jason was leaning intimately into Eric's neck, whispering more of Sookie's childhood fears which were SURE to come in handy later. Claude and his warm bottle of wine were swaying to imaginary music. Alcide was lounging on the sectional, his eyes were closed but his feet continued to tap every so often, like a signal he was still awake. Sookie was lying on the floor.
She looked like an angel. Her hair splayed out around her in frizzy waves reminding Eric of his mother and her great love of Stevie Nicks. Her eyes were closed, her hands were clasped together over her slightly exposed belly button, and one ankle was crossed over the other (very ladylike). She was mumbling to herself.
Eric gently maneuvered out of Jason's embrace and kneeled down beside Sookie. He couldn't make out what she was saying.
"Sookie, you're speaking in tongues." Sookie giggled. It was adorable, and to Eric it sounded a bit like a guinea pig. He smiled and ghosted his fingertips over her cheek. Claude winked at Jason.
"BED." It was Sookie's one simple command. Eric nodded and lifted her gently into his arms, moving down the hallway while the tiny blonde nuzzled into his chest.
"Put her in my room," Claude shouted out to him, "since Jason's sleeping in The Potato Sack!" Claude laughed hysterically-hard at his own Joke, but Eric wasn't About to let her stay cuddled up next to someone as devious as Claude.
"She doesn't have to share with you. She can sleep on the pull-out in my suite." Eric continued on his journey.
"In that case, man, tuck her into in her OWN bed, I'll bunk with you in your Suite." He wanted to argue, but Jas actually looked serious for the first time all night. He nodded to Jason and carried Sookie to her bedroom.
She continued to smile up at Eric with her big, beautiful, blue eyes that she could barely keep open. He placed her gently on top of her sheets, admiring what all she had done to her room. There were a bunch of framed drawings around the room, her bookcase was stocked, and her desktop was even set up already. She must have kept Alcide busy since there was a railing on her ceiling that went around her bed with long white lacey curtains attached.
Sookie lifted her hips off the bed, indicating Eric should pull her covers down so she slide under and get comfy between the sheets, but Eric had to bite his cheek to ignore the small fantasy of Sookie lifting her hips so he could slide her skirt and panties off.
He pulled down the blankets and Sookie snuck her legs underneath them, yawning.
"Um, do you...do you need help, er, want to slip into something more comfortable? For bed?"
She giggled her cute guinea pig giggle and shook her head.
"Nope!" she said, popping the 'p'. "You wouldn't wanna help," she leaned forward to whisper, "I'm not wearing any underwear!"
Eric's Pants felt incredibly tight. She was naked under that outfit? He struggled all night not staring at her nipples knowing she wasn't wearing a bra, but the fact that she was so close to him, wearing a skirt with nothing underneath had him sweating.
"Why?" He asked, more breathy than usual. He wanted to kick himself the minute the word slipped out; he really didn't care why she chose to forego panties!
"Somebody brought me an outfit but no undergarments. And this wasafter he saw it all!" Drunk Sookie shimmied in her bed as she said it and Eric laughed. He ran his hands through his lengthy blonde hair.
"You're killing me Stackhouse..." She was so wasted she actually cocked her head to the side like a confused puppy. "You shouldn't tease me with this kinda stuff, especially since I Saw. It. All."
Sookie shuddered at the huskiness of his voice, THEN she realized what he had just said!
"So, did you see...everything?" She blushed. Eric couldn't resist, so he leaned over to whisper into her ear.
"I didn't know you were so fond of hearts, Sookie." She let out her embarassed "Eeep!" and covered her face while Eric laughed at her.
"It's just a bikini wax," she mumbled through her hands. "I sunbathe ALL the time!"
He coughed to cover up his laughter and started to get up, but Sookie grabbed his wrist and pulled him towards her. Eric complied and stretched out beside her, holding her hand in between them. He was thankful for the sheet that still lay between their bodies.
"I had fun, did you have fun?" She never let Eric answer. "I'm so sorry." She pouted. "I USUALLY don't drink this mush! But I Missed Jas, and I MISSED you!" He smiled at her as she yawned again.
"You should sleep little one, you're probably gonna feel like Hell in the morning." She nodded, her perfect blue eyes fluttering closed.
"Eric, are we friends?" Eric's breath escaped him. He wasn't quite sure what the appropriate response should be. Yes?
"Is that what you want from me Sookie? My friendship?" She smiled, eyes closed.
"Yes." Eric knew better than to feel disappointed, but he still wanted to run from her room. "I'm too afraid to ask for anything more..." she whispered.
Eric's heart stopped.
He waited for her to say something, anything more. Just complete silence, the only sound in the room seemed to be his heart hammering away in chest and ears. As soon as Sookie let out an animalistic SNORE (that by all means should have woken her up) he chuckled and slipped silently out of her room.
So it was sort of a drunk admission of her liking him more than she let on, but it still helped put his mind at ease after his major fuck-up that afternoon.
As soon as he rounded the corner to the kitchen, Claude, Jason and even Alcide froze as though they were guilty of something. They were all holding the bags of red Solo cups Eric had stored in the pantry.
"Hey, is she asleep?"
"Um, yea?"
"Jason had a good idea-" Jas held his hand out to stop the guys from saying too much.
"Got an idea to start an old fashioned prank war with Sookie. Question is, where do Your allegiances lie?" Jason quirked his eyebrow, waiting for Eric's response.
Eric grinned and joined the rest of the men at the sink...
(2 hours later, after Phase 1 of their prank)
"Alright, bed's good to go, got your blankets, pillow. Think you need anything else?" Eric turned to look at the shorter man next to him.
"Naw man, this is good." The two bumped fists and Eric moved to his closet. As he slid the doorway over Jason jumped into the closet like a kid during Christmas!
"Holy shit, Eric! This is some crazy 007 shit right here! Does this lead to a secret passage way to the billiards room?" Eric chuckled and retrieved a pair of sleep pants for the night. He couldn't remember the last time he had to "cover up" for sleep.
Jason's eyes widened as Eric began to disrobe right in front of him and quickly made himself scarce. Eric thought Jason would be getting comfy on the pull-out bed but found Mr. Stackhouse lying in a joking/suggestive position on his own bed.
"Comfortable?" Jason just laughed and rubbed the sheets invitingly. Eric shrugged and lay down next to him anyway.
"You like my sister." Eric placed his hands beneath his head, secretly hoping that the view of his arm-muscles might be enough to show Jason he wouldn't be intimidated by one of his famous "talks".
"I think you'd be good for her." Eric's head snapped around to stare at Jason with disbelief. "I'm serious here, Eric."
"Jason, I don't know what you're talking about."
"Well of course you do! You don't even have to try and hide it. Hell, you can just shut up and let me do all the talking."
"Listen, it's not what you th-"
"Don't act dumb, I saw the way you look at her! Hell, she looks at you the exact same way!" Eric tensed but searched Jason's face to make sure he was telling the truth and not just fuckin' with him.
"Jason-"
"Don't try to talk your way out of it. You're probably TERRIBLE at poker, Northman! I saw how you reacted when you first saw me, then when you realized who I really was! I just spent an entire evening watching you stare at my sister with stars in your eyes! Hell, before I even got here, Gran asked me to check you out and see if you were everything Sookie claimed you were...
Listen, I know Sookie. I know that I haven't seen her this happy in years. I know that she's comfortable enough to dance like a fucking gypsy around you, I know she woulda thrown a punch at me if I didn't stop hassling you during your story for our drinking games! You know that Sookie's never let anyone carry her, ever? She could be drunk out of her skull, and Insist that she'd rather crawl home than let anyone pick her up and carry her-"
"Why?"
"Oh, well, I'm sure she's still carrying around weight issues from middle school. I suppose I should just tell ya her whole life story so you can get a sense of where she's coming from, because you'll be fucked if you try to compare her to any other girl you know. I can't say I'mma tell you everything about her, because there's a big part of Sookie's life she's just gotta tell you herself. You hear it from me and you'll look at her differently, and she'd kick my ass if she found out I was the reason you started acting strange."
Eric paled and Jason's words. Deep down he always knew there had to be some giant skeleton in Sookie's closet. Nobody could be THAT perfect, and Jason was just waiting to drop this bomb on him that'd have him running for the hills, the sadistic son of a bitch! Almost as if Jason could feel his inner turmoil, he tapped Eric's calf with his big toe.
"It's nothing bad, just, usually people see what she's done and all these guy's wanna propose and shi'it."
Eric growled a little.
"Life hasn't been so easy for her, ya know, I mean, even before Bill. Our parents died in a flash flood when we were young. Too fuckin' young, man. Sookie was only 4 when it happened and I know it kills her inside that she can't remember them all that well.
Our Gran took care of us, we didn't have a lot of money growing up, but we always had a lot of love...and biscuits, and the best creamed corn you've ever tasted!" Eric cleared his throat and Jason apologized for getting off topic.
"Years went by, we were happy, but Sookie wasn't always the best looker. Short, chunky all around, braces, those thick dorky glasses she loves so much. Yea, she got teased a lot, but she was still just lovable ol' Sookie! She had tons of friends, just, she let all that ugly go to her head, I guess.
Jesus, no one saw it coming, but pretty much overnight, she shot up 5 inches, all the weight settled to where it was supposed to, braces got taken off, and worst of all, these enormous boobs showed up out of nowhere, I swear I got suspended from school from kicking so many kids' asses! Ya know, with our daddy being gone and all, I needed to look after her, but Sook was so focused on...other things...she never even noticed all the attention she was getting.
I mean, I suppose in a way I'm kinda grateful to Bill. Sookie deserved more than the kinda life a Bon Temps guy could offer her, but that didn't mean she had to spend the rest of her life chained up to him! Guy's a fucking vampire, I swear! For Years, he sucked the fun right out of her soul! I've seen my sister joke, laugh, dance, drink and curse more in these last two days than she has in five years!"
That sentence brought a small smile to Eric's face.
"So anyway, some Stuff happened, and Sook? She had to grow up fast. Too fast. But Sookie never once complained! She's good at being responsible. You'll see! She'll always have her rent in on time, you'll never just be out of something, like peanut butter, or Paper towels! Hell, she'll probably make sure each of you guys brush your teeth every night!" Eric chuckled. That was something he noticed about Sookie right away. She had barely been living there a week and mothered all the guys; always making sure they were fed.
"Not necessarily a bad thing! She gets it from our Gran. Now THERE'S a good woman, you'll see when you meet her."
"Yea?" Eric did a piss-poor job of hiding his excitement. Hearing Jason give his blessing on pursuing his sister could just be another one of those famous Stackhouse pranks, but Jas brought up meeting the woman who raised them like it was Going to happen. Eric allowed himself to hope Jason was 100% serious about this little talk.
"Yeah. Gran's gonna love you. She never thought Bill was good enough for Sook, but she might have a heart attack once she gets a look at you!" Eric smirked. "Yeah, and her Heart might Stop when she imagines how pretty y'alls babies will turn out!" The Northman smirk vanished. "Hahaha, I'm just kidding, Eric! Gran's healthy as a horse!"
"You Stackhouse's...big family of comedians," Eric grumbled as he tried to get comfy for sleep.
"It's true. Never met a Stackhouse I didn't like! Now, let's get down to brass tax. You're in love with Sookie..." Eric swallowed the pool of spit that formed in his mouth. "Course you are, Sook's amazing. I know I can't tell you everything she's done, but Eric, you'll never find another girl like her. She fucking deserves to be happy. Now I know my sister, and from the way she speaks about you, hell, the way she looks at you, I know you're the one that can bring that girl back."
"Jason, don't put all this faith in me, I've already fucked up, there's no way-"
"Oh, you mean that girl you brought home with you? Shi'it, Northman, there's nothing to worry about! I told you, I know my sister!" Jason slapped Eric's bare shoulder. "Right now, Sookie's under the impression she ain't good enough for you. She wants you to be happy and Expects you to go for those women she thinks out class her.
She's no stranger to the way you've treated your women, so it's not like seeing you with someone else came out of left field and broke her heart. You've never formally declared y'all are going steady and all that shit. You never said you're serious about one another, and honestly, that's the kinda thing she needs right now! Just keep it casual." Eric stared at him incredulously and Jason shrugged.
"The girl just broke up with a guy she's been faithful to for 6 years! YEARS! Ended a relationship with a man she planned to marry, buy a house with, have his fucking babies, grow old with!" Eric's teeth were clenched together so hard his head began to ache.
"Seriously Eric, she Doesn't need to jump into something that serious again. Last time she did it she was lucky she got out before making the biggest mistake of her life! She's scared of making those same mistakes.
She likes you, but she knows good and well you're not a one woman kinda man. She's too smart to invest much in someone with your reputation. THAT, plus she doesn't think she's worthy of ya doesn't help much...
So you've Gotta tread carefully, she spooks real easy. You've gotta grow on her like a fungus! Be there for her when she needs ya, like you have been, no more bringing bitches home, and most importantly, DON'T PURSUE HER."
"What?"
"I'm serious. It's been so long since Sookie's been able to make her own decisions. She needs to feel in control of her own life. She'll come to you when she thinks she's ready.
Eric, I know i'm asking a lot, and if you're as much like me as I think you are, you're gonna have to make a bunch of changes and have a lot of patience. -And probably a case of blue balls."
"Jason! I think you're getting way ahead of yourself here. I mean, I may have pursued her a little, but it didn't work out. It's like, for every step forward we take 12 back.
I'm not really sure why you've got all this faith in me either! I'm sure everyone in this house has told you I'm not a relationship kind of man, Aren't I the kind of guy you want to keep away from your little sister?"
"Nah, she's a scrappy little thing and I know for a fact that girl Is stronger than she looks. She can take care of herself just fine. I've learned my lesson, let Sook choose her own men, otherwise, that insecure nerd next door will end up with another asshole like Bill.
You and I are a lot alike, Northman. And as far as I'm concerned, for guys like us, its not so much changing our whole way of life, it's more like, you've been waiting for this girl all along."
Jason smiled to himself, looking wistfully at nothing in particular before adding:
"Besides, if you REALLY fuck up, I've got my shotgun."
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