Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyers owns all. No copyright infringement is intended.

You can all thank Legna989, once again, for Laurent's kickass Frenglish.

And you can thank Ooohlalaaa for the chappie title/quote—she kicks ass and comes through with gold when I'm too lazy to do shit.

"Who can bring what is pure from the impure? No one!"

Job 14:4

Jasper Hale

"So, if you're not...I mean...so what are you doing...to handle...you know?" Peter asked, taking a swig of his beer.

He and I were at some Mexican dive near his apartment drinking beers. I told myself that I invited him out to catch up, but really I wanted to talk to a normal person and get a normal perspective on things. Usually James was my go-to guy for beers, but the longer I went without getting laid the less I could stand him. I didn't normally do this male bonding and talking about feelings shit, so instead I just invited Peter out under the guise of catching up and then did some backhanded manipulation of the conversation until we landed on what I really wanted to talk about. Of course, since Peter was such a sweet and sensitive bastard, that took about 30 seconds after sitting down.

I just shrugged and made the international sign for wanking.

"It's like I don't even know you anymore, man," Peter said, laughing. "I mean, it's great, but it's weird."

"It's great? How is the fact that I'm not getting laid great?"

"No, I mean that you've sort of committed yourself..."

I cut him off, "Ugh, don't put it like that. Please. I think I'm going to be sick." I finished the last half of my beer in one gulp and flagged the bartender for another.

"Jasper, it's not the worst thing. You need to stop acting like...James."

"I'm not acting like James. James doesn't commit because no girl would ever give him the opportunity. I just don't ever want you to use that word in reference to me and a girl again." A girl in white short-shorts walked past and I stared at her ass until it disappeared into the restroom. She was all snaggle-toothed and trashy but it didn't take much to distract me these days. "It's not like I've ruled out the idea of hooking up with someone else. It's just…it never seems to work."

"Hmm…so, you haven't slept with anyone since you've been with her, you hang out with her all the time, and you're developing some semblance of a conscience. What would you call that?"

"She's a teenager, Pete. I don't date teenagers."

"But teenagers are the ones you always go for."

"Exactly."

"Well, then why don't you have sex with her and get it over with?"

"Like I said, she's all scared and not ready or something. She is way more inexperienced than I expected."

"Well, help her along."

I laughed and grabbed the new beer before the bartender could even deposit it on the coaster. "I'm not a fucking date rapist dude."

"You know that's not what I meant. I don't even know why I am trying to help you here. You're actually bitching about some high school kid not putting out. Like, no shit, Jasper, what do you expect?"

"Well, I've never had this problem before," I said, wishing I had picked Felix instead. No, he'd probably relate everything to mergers and acquisitions and just confuse the shit out of me.

"Clearly your slutdar needs to be recalibrated then. Or maybe you just need to be honest with yourself and admit that you like this chick and you don't want to screw around on her. And deep down you probably even like that she's not giving it up. I mean, if I didn't know better, I'd say you almost respect her."

I snorted. "All right, Freud. Anything else I should know about? Do all my commitment issues stem from Mommy not loving me enough?"

"Shit, are you kidding? Mommy loved you too damn much and spoiled your ass, which is why you're a self-centered prick now."

"Okay, why did I want to come out with you?"

"Because if you went out with James you know he'd probably either tell you to roofie her drink or threaten to do one of her friends to make her jealous—or some other equally sage piece of advice."

"True. Still, I don't fucking appreciate the psychoanalysis."

"Whatever, that's my two cents; you don't have to take it. Personally, I hope she holds out longer. I'm really enjoying your crippling sexual frustration."

"Yeah, unfortunately I don't have as much practice at not fucking as you do."

"Touché. So what are you doing tonight, cuddling with your girlfriend and watching 'The Notebook'?"

"Yeah, want to join us or will you be busy hanging out with your cat and repressing your homosexuality?"

"Nah, I'm free, I'll come over. Maybe I can warm your girl up for you, since you're having a bit of performance anxiety."

"By all means, should I dress her like a boy to make it easier?" He scowled and I gulped down another quarter of a bottle. "I can go all night you know."

"Your chick would beg to differ."

"All-the-fuck-right, dude, quit it. I'm all fucking vulnerable and shit right now, stop kicking me while I'm down."

"Sorry. Listen, if you need to get laid and you really don't care about the commitment thing, then why don't you just go have sex with someone else?"

"I.." I started and then hesitated for a moment, trying to collect my thoughts. "I don't know. I guess 'cause her vag is like the Holy Grail now or something, and so like, all the other vaginas are just fucking run of the mill. I feel like all my energy needs to be put into that sole pursuit."

He nodded slowly, his face serious. "It's like she's Excalibur but instead of taking it out, you wanna put your sword in that shit."

"Exactly, man. Exactly."

"All right, so then figure out why she's hesitating and then address that shit. There's gotta be a reason. And if it's just nerves or morals or something, well then you have to decide if she's worth waiting for."

I nodded. For some reason, that sentence incited a weird, almost involuntary reaction in me. It was as if I couldn't even ponder that question because I'd hate myself too much if the answer was no. Something between the two of us had changed since the day Bella met my father. I didn't like to think too much about it, but I couldn't deny it either. When she stood there saying all that stuff to the Rev about me being nice and shit, I just thought who are you? Where did you come from? That girl just took me by surprise all the damn time.

"There's a party tonight, dude, maybe that will take your mind off shit. It's at Laurent's place, but you know it's better than nothing."

I nodded. I felt like a little break from Bella was a good idea. I needed to clear my head a bit and it always just got all fogged up when she was around.

"Yeah, I'll go. I'll come by later tonight to ride with you okay?" We stayed for a couple more beers and shot the shit.

Around five we paid the bill and parted ways. We planned to meet again around ten thirty or so that night.

I headed down the street towards the city center to get a cab when I noticed a group of girls in my favorite little green uniform.

I saw a familiar head of spiky black hair and as I approached the group, I saw Bella squatting on the sidewalk behind her friend, Tits, whose name I had forgotten yet again, rifling through her backpack.

Alice saw me first and rolled her eyes, calling out to the group, "Uh oh girls, I hope you're all ready to watch a serious game of tonsil hockey."

Bella looked up, squinted, and then smiled when she saw me. "Shut up, Alice. Hi, Jasper!"

I waved and just as I was about to pass Alice I grabbed her head and pulled her into a headlock, rubbing my knuckles into her hair. She squealed and squirmed from my grip.

"You need to get new friends," I said to Bella as I released Alice.

Bella stood up. She was wearing her uniform, this time a polo shirt with the sleeves rolled up over her shoulders, and the cute skirt and knee socks. That shit killed me every time. Her hair was pulled off her face with a thin white headband and she had a bottle of sun block in her hands.

"Yeah, maybe you should pick up a winner like James," Alice suggested.

Bella looked at her and smirked, "Yeah, we know how much you hate James."

All five girls exchanged a glance and a giggle. I recognized Tits and Glasses but there was a new blonde there as well. She was pretty hot, but I could tell she was a bitch from a mile away. She reminded me too much of a certain family member.

I turned to Alice, smiling. "It's too bad you don't like James. He always has such nice things to say about you."

Alice blushed hard and shook her head. "Whatever, it's been like thirty seconds; you guys must be dying to make out."

I turned back to Bella. She laughed at Alice and then winked at me. She was never really trying, but sometimes she was such a fucking vixen. I moved closer to her and grabbed the sun block from her hand. I tossed it onto the large cement planter behind her and laced my fingers into hers.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey."

I leaned in to kiss her and got about five seconds of tongue action before she pulled away, no doubt embarrassed by the audience of bitchy teenage girls—just another fucking hazard of the job.

"What are you doing here anyway?" she asked.

"You always seemed so shocked to see me. You do realize we live in the same city, right?"

"It's a big city. It wasn't meant to be an interrogation, just wondering what you're up to. You smell like beer."

I kissed her nose. "I just had a couple beers with Peter." I reached behind her and picked up the sunblock. "And what are you up to?"

"We are going swimming at Jessica's house."

Fuck, can I get an invite to that shit? A bunch of teenage girls in bikinis all splashing around and shit? Jesus, a nice image like that would seriously last me at least another sexless week. As she spoke I noticed the string of her bathing suit tied around her neck. I reached beneath the collar of her shirt and tugged on it.

"Sounds like fun. I have a pool you know." My fingers slid along the string to the back of her neck.

"Yeah, I know. You've never invited me to use it, though." Her breathing seemed to pick up just a little bit and all I could think about was bikini, skin, wet.

"What's mine is yours," I mumbled, not even really sure what was coming out of my mouth anymore. Another week of this shit and I'd be legally retarded.

"Okay, well, I'm still going to Jessica's today. What are you doing later?"

Right, Jessica, that was Tits' name. It wouldn't have killed me to see her in a bathing suit either, but whatever.

"Party. At some French dickhead's place," I said, staring at the place where the string disappeared into her shirt and trying not to let my thoughts go to places that would make it difficult or embarrassing to get home.

"All right, have fun. Sounds like you're really looking forward to it," she said, smiling. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

I managed to drag my eyes back to hers. I moved closer. "Bright and early, Sunshine," I said, my lips nearly touching hers. I lingered there for a moment before kissing her again.

She hesitated a lot before breaking that kiss, and only did so when her friends started to laugh. She blushed and looked down at her bag.

"Sorry, forgot about the peanut gallery." I pulled her hair forward over her shoulder and kissed her forehead. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Right, bright and early. So should I expect your call around five or six?" She snickered, the bright color receding from her cheeks.

I moved my hands to her hips and squeezed, hard. "Now I see why you and the midget get along so well," I said, pressing my lips into her ear.

Instead of laughing, she shifted nervously and blushed again. Maybe I wasn't the only one getting uncomfortably turned on. The other girls were now awkwardly talking amongst themselves. I released Bella and backed away.

"Later," I said. I turned to her friends and waved, wiggling my fingers. "Byeeee, ladies!"

The maniacal giggling started up before I was even out of earshot. It was like music to my ears. With a smile on my face I flagged a cab and headed home for a pre-party nap.

Of course, sleep didn't come easily after that afternoon. Perhaps it was the beers making me all warm and fuzzy, but that brief conversation revved the shit out of my libido. Every time I closed my eyes I saw flashes of skin and bikini tops and hair and lips and flushed cheeks and suddenly they'd be open again and I'd have to catch my breath. I cursed myself for not offering to help her apply that sun block. She got me all flustered and messed up my game.

After however many minutes of trying to refocus, I gave in once again to my seemingly ever-present hard-on. That shit was getting ridiculous. As I unbuttoned my jeans, I relaxed my mind and let the many images of a bikini-clad Bella take over. In reality she was a tough fucking egg to crack, but in my mind I could do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. So today she was wearing those French-style bikini bottoms that tie at the sides, and I was going to bend her over the diving board.

I reveled in that imagery for a while, until the vision disappeared and I couldn't concentrate on anything other than my impending climax. After I finished I sighed and rolled out of bed, wondering when I'd get to come somewhere other than into a fucking Kleenex.

I took a shower and after that I finally felt relaxed enough to sleep. I didn't bother to get dressed again, instead just collapsing back into bed in my towel. I woke up at 9:00 to my phone buzzing on the nightstand. I grabbed it and squinted at the display. James.

"J," I said, rolling on to my back.

"What's up? Are you picking me up for this party?"

"Peter's gonna drive. I'm meeting him at his place so just meet us there."

"All right, I'll bring the beers since it's your birthday and shit tomorrow."

"Thanks, man. Not quite a stripper, but I'll take it."

"Oh dude, we should totally get a birthday stripper...but I'm sort of broke, can you float me some cash?"

"Lend you money to pay for my birthday stripper? Don't worry about it J, I'm good, I get enough eye-candy with no follow through as is."

"True. Can I still borrow some dough, though?"

I shook my head. "Later, J."

I rolled out of bed and spent a few minutes making myself pretty. I headed downstairs and much to my surprise, found Edward and Rosalie lounging in the family room.

"Big night, guys?" I asked.

Edward did not look up from his book. Rosalie rolled her eyes but asked, "Where are you going?"

"Party. Later, guys. Don't get too crazy here."

"We're going to Carmen's later. She's having a party too, assface."

"Sounds awesome. Catch ya later." I turned to leave and then had a thought and turned back. "So who's going to this party anyway?"

Edward looked up from the book. Yeah, that got his attention. The little fucker was so fucking obvious I wanted to punch him in the face. I mean the fucking nerve.

Rosalie just sneered. "You mean like, is that Bella girl going? No. She doesn't normally get invited to those parties but I don't know…" she turned to Edward, "Did you invite her?"

Edward glared at her. "No, Rose, I didn't fucking invite her."

Rosalie turned back to me. "They are best friends now."

Edward's eyes rolled up to the ceiling. I turned to him. "Oh really, E? Best friends? That was quick—a couple weeks ago you barely knew who she was, if I'm not mistaken."

"Rosalie is grossly exaggerating. We are lab partners for a Bio project."

"Hmm," I said, "partners…what a coincidence."

Edward and I just stared at each other for a moment. Rosalie went back to inspecting the ends of her hair. "Anyway, before you go, can you buy us some beer?" she asked.

I looked away from Edward and back at her. "Yeah, all right, but you know the drill, leave me out of it if you assholes get caught."

I hopped in my car and cued up the Stevie Ray Vaughan. I stopped at the liquor store and got some beer for Rosalie and Broody-boy and then stopped at a convenience store for tobacco and rolling papers. When I got home I deposited the beer in the deep freezer in the garage and honked twice, signaling Rosalie to go get it.

Twenty minutes later, I was at Peter's. The three of us headed over to the party in his car and I thanked my lucky stars regularly for my one or two responsible friends who managed to keep my ass alive. I could already feel that it was going to be one of those mass consumption-type nights.

Laurent was in our faces from the moment he opened the door.

"Peetair, Zhames, Zhaspair, mes frères, so good to see you! Where ees Feeleex? I 'ave hees birthday presahnt steel."

I rolled my eyes and headed to the fridge to deposit the beer. Clearly while I was gone, one of those fuckers spilled the damn beans and Laurent came bursting into the kitchen all fucking fake-jolly and French.

"Zhaspair! Eet's your birthday! 'appy Birthday, mon homme! We need to 'ave a shot."

I looked up at the ceiling and back at him. "All right, Laurent. Thanks, it's tomorrow, but all right. I need more than one, though."

"I 'ave some spesseeal tequila. Take your beer, allons-y."

I followed him into the dining room area and he ducked into the liquor cabinet and reemerged with a bottle of Don Julio Silver. We sat at the table and commenced downing shots of it.

"A votre santé! Bonne Anniversaire!" he said merrily, raising his glass. I had no clue what that shit meant but I drank to it anyway.

Before I realized it, the bottle was empty, we were laughing our asses off and I fucking loved that French bastard. When I finished my beer, it occurred to me that my judgment was impaired so I got up from the table and left Peter with a plastered Laurent, who was talking about baguettes and brioches or some other type of French shit.

I wanted to hang out with James, whom I could probably tolerate now that I was drunk, but he was slobbering all over some chick on the couch. I mingled for a bit but I couldn't think straight and everyone was boring so I locked myself in a bedroom and tried to sober up a bit.

A few minutes or hours later, I pulled my phone from my pocket and called Bella. After a couple rings she picked up.

"Do you know what time it is?"

I think I grunted.

"Jasper, it's twelve-thirty. What's up?"

"You made it sound like it was late. It's only twelve-thirty. It's not late."

"Well, it is, kind of. I mean, for an unsolicited phone call."

"It's Friday."

"I know."

"Come over."

"Where? To your house?"

"Some other guy's house. This party. Come over."

"Jasper, I can't. I can't go out now."

"Come on. Come over. Just sneak out."

"I'm at Alice's right now, I'm sleeping over here."

"Alice can give you a ride. She can come. Tell her James wants to see her."

She was silent for a few moments.

"Hold on," she finally said.

I heard some muffled talking and a minute later she spoke again, "Give me the address."

I smiled and gave her directions.

I think I fell asleep for a bit after I hung up the phone. I woke up to Laurent shaking me.

"'ay, Zhaspair, your girlfriend ees 'ere. Wake up!"

I slapped his hand away. "Get out of here, I'm up."

I turned my head to Bella and flashed her my "I know I'm drunk but I'm also cute" smile. She was wearing a short denim skirt and a faded Ford Mustang t-shirt. She had to know what that did to me. Laurent and Bella exchanged exasperated looks and when he left the room, I grabbed her arm and yanked her onto the bed. She crawled over me and lay down.

"You have to wear that shirt all the time. Except when you're naked."

"You reek."

"I missed you, too."

"You smell like a Mexican whorehouse."

"You've been to a Mexican whorehouse?"

"Jasper."

I rolled over and pushed her on her back and just fucking dove in. She squirmed a little at first but after a second her hand was in my hair, the other on my chest. I pushed my hands beneath her shirt and her bra and settled in to the only base I had managed to steal so far. I knew it well, but everything felt different tonight. Her kisses were desperate and when I replaced my fingers with my mouth, she moaned and arched her back and writhed beneath me. Normally, I clocked in at about three minutes of having my mouth on her tits before she tweaked, but tonight I broke the shit out of that record.

This could be it, I thought. This could fucking be it.

Of course when I moved my hand down her stomach she grabbed it and pushed my head away.

"Wait," came her breathless whisper.

I came very close to crying. And then I felt really fucking angry. I rolled onto my back and sighed heavily, staring at the ceiling.

After a minute she rolled into me, throwing her arm over my chest. She snuggled close and pulled my earlobe between her teeth. I fucking loved when she did that shit, but not tonight. I jerked my head away.

"Bella, enough. Let's just go to sleep."

"What?" she asked, her voice betraying her—I could tell my reaction did not come as a surprise.

"I can't do this start and stop shit. I can't, I'm going fucking crazy. Let's go to sleep." I wanted to hide my frustration but it was getting impossible.

She sat up on her elbow. "You're drunk and you're being an asshole."

I turned to face her. "No, Bella, I'm a guy and I'm fucking horny as hell and that is making me an asshole." She looked away and I started to feel bad. "I'm sorry, I don't want to be like this with you. I'm just not used to it. I'm fucking going crazy."

"I'm sorry, Jasper… I am… It's not that I don't want to, it's just…I don't know."

"You don't know or you won't tell me? I wish you would help me…like, help me help you. I don't know what to do and I don't want to pressure you but…" All the frustration was sobering me up and making me feel even more annoyed.

"It's not…I'm not scared. Okay, well I am a bit, but probably not for the reasons you think."

She lay back down on the bed, and I raised myself and leaned over her.

"So why don't you tell me? I can't do anything about anything if you don't tell me what's up."

"Well, apart from the obvious that you've done so much more than me and my inexperience is going to be horribly embarrassing…I just…I know that we're not exclusive, and honestly I'm fine with that, but, I mean, going any further…I just feel weird about it knowing that there are other girls. I know that's lame and it makes no sense but I just can't help but think about it every time…"

I stared at her for a moment and then rolled over onto my back again. "You know, I haven't even been with anyone else since I met you." I felt kind of lame admitting that, but I figured if it was the truth, I should get credit for that shit.

She turned her head to look at me. "Really?"

"Yeah. I mean, it wasn't some big conscious effort, but it's not like I didn't have the opportunity, either."

"So then why? I mean why haven't you?" she asked after a moment.

I shrugged. "Just…it felt a bit off. I don't know, I don't really have a good reason and I don't want you to think it's 'cause I was being all faithful or whatever. It just never happened."

We were both silent for a while, and finally she nestled herself against me, resting her head on my chest.

"Thanks. Or whatever. I'm sorry I doubted you. It's not because of what people say even, or at least not totally. It's just 'cause we never really defined anything, so I just kind of figured you'd be with other girls."

I wasn't sure if she was baiting me, or trying to get some kind of commitment from me, but I felt like I needed to choose my words carefully. "It's all right—it's not as if it was the most far-fetched concern."

She laughed a little bit and then I felt her hand slide under my t-shirt. She ran her fingers along my abdomen and I closed my eyes. I tried to let the movements of her fingers relax me, but of course that never worked, and as they glided just below the waistband of my jeans, my eyes snapped open. I just couldn't bear the torment tonight.

"Bella." I tilted my head down and she looked up at me, her expression all innocent and expectant. "Not now, okay? I'm sorry, that feels awesome but I can't...I'm probably going to have a nervous breakdown or something, so I think maybe we should just sleep."

Outside I could hear the muffled sounds of Laurent and some chick singing "Islands in the Stream" and I was actually thankful, because it really helped stave off my impending sexual meltdown.

That is, until—instead of honoring my request—Bella's fingers moved beneath the waistband of my Calvins and began to frolic in my secret garden.

I was about to protest, or beg for mercy, or cry like a baby, when her hand moved lower still, until I felt it move right over my cock.

I brought one hand to my face and arched my head back. "Fuck..." I groaned. How could her hand feel ten thousand times better than my own?

I think I heard the chorus of "Ode to Joy" when she unbuttoned my jeans and pulled my junk out. I didn't even know what she was doing, it was all random grabbing and squeezing and touching but I didn't fucking care, because I was pretty much already about to come. She could have just looked at it for a few minutes and that would have done the trick. The best part of being with a virgin was hands down the fact that she had no idea just how pathetically fast I was going to come. But still I wanted to see where exactly she was taking this so I tried to refocus and let a string of gross thoughts (rotting garbage, FIAT cars, any music by John Mayer, Laurent in a thong, our maid in a negligee) hold the O-monster at bay for a little longer.

I rolled over and nudged her on her back. Her hand reclaimed its place right away. I groaned and even though I felt a little dizzy, I managed to get my shirt and her shirt and bra off before ravaging her mouth. After a couple minutes of basking in the glorious feeling of someone else touching my shit, I realized she had no clue what she was doing. She was pretty much just holding my dick, which was fine; she could hold it all night if she wanted to, I just kind of hoped she'd move it up and down from time to time.

"Can you show me what to do? I'm sorry, I don't really...I'm not sure..." she stammered, looking all cute and sheepish.

I nodded and moved my fingers over hers. "I should be a good teacher; I've had a lot of practice recently."

She laughed. "Sorry."

I moved her hand up my shaft a few times before removing it and showing her myself. "It's all in the wrist," I explained, immediately feeling the absence of her touch.

"It's kind of hot watching you do that," she said leaning back.

"Don't fuck with me," I said, "Get back here."

She moved closer again and replaced my hand with hers.

"It'll be a little difficult without any lube or anything, just, you know, be gentle, but not too gentle."

"Wait a sec." She crawled over me and hopped off the bed. I was getting nervous and was tempted to just tie her down. If she had any second thoughts, I would sure as shit have a fucking stroke. She crouched over her purse and returned with a small tube of Vaseline Moisture Therapy. "Will this help?"

I breathed a heavy sigh of relief. "Yeah, sure, just don't go all crazy with that stuff."

She rubbed some of the lotion between her hands and went to town on my dick. My eyes rolled back in my head and I was briefly transported to a fucking alternate dimension of awesome. She was a quick learner. After a couple minutes of wallowing in pure bliss, I slowly came to my senses and moved my hand down her back to her ass. I pulled her denim skirt up, slipped my hand beneath her panties and squeezed her ass a few times before sliding it lower. She flinched and I halted my movements.

"One thing at a time, okay?" she whispered.

The hand job would be a bit more fun if I was knuckles deep in her lady parts, but I was so fucking elated that I was more than happy to just stare at her boobs while she wanked me.

"Yeah, sorry," I mumbled before kissing her.

"It's okay, I just need to concentrate," she said, continuing the kiss as soon as she finished speaking.

Just the thought of her concentrating on my cock made my balls tighten. I held on for as long as I could, partly due to my pride, but mostly because of the high possibility that this was all some fucked up dream that may never repeat itself. If I woke up with my dick in my hand, I'd probably need to punch someone in the face.

Bella's gentle squeezing told me this probably wasn't a dream and her last few strokes were so right on that I had to pull my lips from hers to groan out a warning. "I'm gonna come any second."

"Where?" she asked.

"Right here," I breathed, grabbing her hand and angling myself just before blowing my load on someone's grey bedspread.

Bella allowed me a few minutes to catch my breath before asking, "Whose room is this?"

"No idea."

I looked around and noticed a little French flag pinned to the corkboard by the computer desk. I smiled to myself and grabbed a box of tissues off the nightstand and cleaned myself and the comforter up a bit.

"Hey, did you come here with Alice?"

She slapped her forehead. "Yes. Oh my God, I'm a terrible friend. I should go find her."

She sat up, but I grabbed her and pulled her back down on to me. "No."

"Jasper, she's out there with James and a bunch of people she doesn't know," she said, not really fighting my grip.

"She's probably having fun. Stay."

She straddled my waist and lowered her head onto my chest and I played with her hair.

"Was it any good?" she asked, her voice vibrating against my chest.

I pulled her hair to the side and ran my fingers down her smooth back. "The best," I reassured her.

I wanted to believe that in my previous state anyone would have been the best, but I knew that wasn't true. As retarded and confusing as it was, it was better because it was her. I shook my head, disappointed by the increasing frequency of those kinds of thoughts.

We lay there for a while just talking and touching and kissing. At some point, there came a soft knock at the door and Bella shot up, scanning the bed for her clothes. She quickly grabbed my t-shirt and threw it on. A second later Alice came in, dragging James behind her.

"He's too drunk," she said. "He needs to go home or go to sleep. He needs to stop trying to sing Def Leppard."

James shook his hand out of Alice's grip and held it to his face like a microphone. He pointed at Bella and stumbled over to the bed.

"I'm hot, sticky and sweet, from my head to my feet, yeahhhhh." He made some guitar noises and did a bit of air guitaring before collapsing onto the end of the bed. Alice climbed onto the other side next to Bella and squinted at her.

"You're wearing a different shirt," she said. She turned to me, "and you're not wearing one at all."

Bella opened her mouth but I spoke first. "Which begs the question, what the hell are you guys doing in here?"

Alice frowned. "I'm tired of babysitting."

"Is that what you were doing?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

Alice scowled and Bella slapped my arm. "Ignore him. I'm sorry, Al, I lost track of time. I thought you were probably having fun."

"I was 'til this guy got too sloppy to stand on his own," she said gesturing with a thumb to James, who was dangerously close to rolling off the bed.

"Aw, you've been taking care of him," Bella teased.

Alice blushed and shook her head. "Someone had to, since his best friend was in here doing God knows what to you."

"I wasn't doing shit. It's what she was doing t-"

Bella clapped her hand over my mouth. I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her down with me. Alice just stuck her finger in her throat, as she was apt to do in our presence. We all made fun of each other for a bit more until the conversation faded and we were lulled to sleep by the gentle sounds of James' snoring.

Just before I nodded off, I grabbed Bella's chin and turned her face up to mine. Her eyes fluttered a bit but never really opened. I wanted to thank her or tell her how pretty she looked tonight, or apologize to her for how drunk I was, but she was sleeping and she looked all peaceful and beautiful, so instead I just kissed her nose and her forehead and then let my head fall back onto the pillow.

Okay—as usual I suck at review replies but I promise I like shit my pants over all of them. Srsly. (Okay, not seriously, but you know).