Well I'm finally back and I have to say that I'm really sorry that I haven't been able to update earlier:( There are a couple of reasons as to why this chapter is so late, the major ones are that I have been sick with ponding headaches, and have thus not have any energy to write or think at all. I have also had a lot of homework to do now in the end of the semester, because the teachers are supposed to set our grades and stuff. Plus I have sort of had a writers block. All in all it's not really a good combination.

I think I'm gonna be able to start updating pretty regular now though, since it's soon christmas break and all, which will give me plenty of time to write I hope:) So thanks for supporting this story so far and I hope you enjoy and review this very late but long chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own bleach at all, if I did the last chapter would probably not had been so awesome. I love bleach right now!

The day was the second december, the first sunday in december. About three months had passed since Ichigo and his friends entered the shinigami academy and they had long since started to get used to their life there. Overall they liked it here.

What they had soon noticed though, was that the seven of them were not like other students. They were, as Grimmjow had said, much more talented. They had completed all tasks the teachers had given them at an incredible speed and as the teachers always did when they had especially talented students they moved them up, to higher classes. The only one who was still studying one of the four center subjects with the first years was Ichigo. Even though Ichigo had managed to improve a lot in his Kido, thanks to his and Nelliels training, he had still not been able become good enough to be moved a class up.

Yesterday they had went to their second normal meditation lesson, because last week Unohana-taichio had told them that her special lessons were no longer necessary. All seven of them had managed to achieve enough control to not harm themselves or anyone around them. She warned them that they would still need to be careful, and if anything really bad happened they might have to go back to being taught by her again. Hopefully nothing like that would happen though, she had told them in a warning tone.

That had made their Saturday pretty unusual, but this Sunday would be just as unusual. On normal Sundays the seven of them sometimes ventured into Seretei, looking around, other times they just stayed at the school to chat or train. Mostly they just relaxed and did whatever they wanted, since it was the only day that was their free day. Sadly they usually had to do some homework though. They had even more homework than ordinary students because of them being moved up.

This Sunday though, something special was happening at the school. A young girl who had just become the vice captain of the ninth squad was holding a speech at the school. It was something that every student at the entire school was going to and they all thought it had the potential of being really interesting.

The young girl who had just been given the position of vice captain of the ninth squad was sitting at the couch in the ninths squads office waiting for her captain. The two of them were soon going to leave for the academy, which she had not visited since her sister graduated.

This time though she was going to hold a speech, for the entire school. She was not somebody that was easily scared and she would do this, she would stake her pride on it. The only thing was that she had another problem besides talking in front of a bunch of people and that problem could be summarized into one sentence: The rumors about Ichigo and his friends going to the school.

A man opened the door, walked into the office and interrupted her thoughts. The man wore ordinary shinigami robs, but he had an captains haoir over it. He was the captain of the ninth squad.

"Kurosaki-fukotaicho are you ready", he asked the girl in a friendly tone.

"Of course Hisagi-taicho", the girl answered. "I'm ready."

While she and Hisagi-taicho shunpoed to the academy grounds she could not stop the thought from swirling around her head. Maybe, maybe, just maybe she would see Ichigo today. If she did she would see him for her first time in 10 years. For ten fucking years had she looked for him, hoping to find him, but for no point. Her hope of ever seeing him again had almost been crushed into nothing, and she did not know if she dared to hope this time.

At the same time she was worried. What if, if he was really there. What was she supposed to do? According to the piece of information that her father never told her that day when Ichigo died you lost all your memories of your life when you were alive when you died. Ichigo had obviously done so to, since otherwise he would have just been able to go to Soul Society and be recognized. If he had she would have met him long since.

What the hell am I supposed to do? The thought would not leave her head, she could not get it away because she really did not know the answer to it. There was no one she could ask either, no one who could help her. She did not feel like talking to her idiot of a father, she did not want to worry her sister and she definitely did not want to bother anyone else. She knew that she would be able to talk to him if she felt like it. He would listen to her if she felt like talking to him, but he was the one she wanted to talk to least of all. She hated the thought of him seeing her all weak like this. She hated it.

She and Hisagi-taicho soon arrived at the academy grounds and she snapped out of her thoughts. This was it. She would have to concentrate to have a good speech, which she had to have, but at the same time she had to look around to see if she could find that orange head of hair that could only belong to her brother.

When it was time Hisagi-taicho was the first one to talk and that gave her time to look for him. Her eyes swept over the crowd, looking for a spot of orange hair. It did not take her long to it. Her brothers light hair stood out from the crowd, confirming her suspicion. He was here. She was finally seeing her brother again.

She wanted to run down to him, to hug him, to scream at him, but most of all she felt like talking to him. It didn't work that way though, she already knew that but it frustrated her so much. He would not remember her, he would not have any idea of who she was. At least he is alright she tried to tell herself, at least he is fine.

She heard how Hisagi-taicho finished talking and knew that it was her turn. Before starting she took one more look at his brother and the friends around him. It seemed as if he had come to the same place as his three friends as she could see both Inoue, Ishida and Chad. He also seemed to have found some new friends, as she saw three other people talking to him, people that she did not recognize.

She took a deep breath and pushed Ichigo out of her mind, she needed to concentrate now. This would go well. She took one more deep breath and then she began talking.

"Hi everyone", she began. "I am Kurosaki Karin, the new fukotaicho of the ninth squad."

"That was pretty interesting", Nelliel told her friends a while after Kurosaki-fukotaicho had finished her speech. The seven of them had gathered in a clearing to hang out with each other. They were supposed to do there homework, but for now they were only chatting.

"Her speech I mean", Nelliel continued when she saw the way they looked at her. "This was my first time seeing a Kurosaki, even though they are pretty famous."

"They are famous", Ichigo asked. He had heard that last name before, but he could not remember from were, it was escaping him. He was getting a bad feeling from all this: The name that felt uncomfortably familiar even though he had never heard it, the way the girl had looked at him, plus an strange feeling in his gut.

"I've also heard that name before", Uryuu said. "I heard some people on campus talk about somebody named Kurosaki, but I didn't know it was a famous name. Do any of you know?"

"Of course we do", Orihime said and laughed. "One time when I was talking with Nelliel, she began gossiping and mentioned the name Kurosaki. When I told her I had no idea of who Kurosaki was, she got so shocked and immediately told me. I think you three are the only one who doesn't know who the Kurosaki family are." She looked at her three male friends Ichigo, Uryuu and Chad.

"You know who they are Grimmjow", Ichigo asked surprised that everyone seemed to know who they were. He couldn't help but wonder if Grimmjow was just as oblivious as he was, since Grimmjow didn't seem interested in anything but fighting.

"I know a bit", he answered in a gruff tone. "I have heard that they are supposed to be an extremely talented family and very good at fighting."

"Well I'll tell you all about them", Nelliel said. Nelliel couldn't stand seeing people not knowing anything about what was happening around them, plus she loved gossiping.

"Thanks Nell", Ichigo said before she had time to start talking. Maybe if she told him all she knew he might realize why he seemed to recognize that name, he thought to himself. He could always hope.

"You welcome", she answered Ichigo in a playful tone. "Anyway the Kurosaki family is a famous family because of the older brother in this family. He and three human friends played an important role in the war against the arrancar and Aizen. Only a few people know how they look and what their names are, since it became forbidden to talk about after the war. There are only rumors. So I don't know a lot about what happened in that war, but I think we are gonna learn more about that in school. Anyway I know that he was the one that finally defeated Aizen and there are rumors that say that the war would never have been won if he and his friends never participated. Anyway it's said that at the price for defeating Aizen the Kurosaki brother lost all his powers. Two or three years later, I don't really know, he and his four friends died and went to Soul Society. The four of them has never been found though, but there are still people who are searching for them. Anyway the Kurosaki family moved to Soul Society about eight years ago I think, and I don't really know why. The two girls in the family began in the shingami academy and they apparently had extreme potential, especially this Kurosaki Karin. As we heard before Kurosaki Karin managed to graduate in three years, which is very rare, her sister Kurosaki Yuza graduated in four years. That is not as rare as graduating in two years of course, but it's still pretty rare. Their father was apparently a shingami captain before he somehow stayed in the mortal world were he married a human woman and had children, so when he came back he was offered to become captain over the fifth squad, since they desperately needed a captain. The woman he married and the mother in the Kurosaki family is said to be dead so the three of them are the only ones living in Seretei. I think that's the most important stuff."

"Wow", Orihime said. "You've told me this story ones before, but I still get so impressed every time I hear it. Cause just think about it, there was humans fighting more dangerous monsters than that hollow that almost killed us. I just think thats pretty unbelievable, and totally impressive."

"It sorta is", Ichigo admitted. He was also impressed after hearing that story, but at the same time it continued to give him a strange feeling in the gut. He felt like he had heard it before the same as with the name Kurosaki, like it was supposed to be familiar. He tried to pin it to the fact that they apparently was famous and that he had probably just heard somebody else talk about it. He could not shake the uncomfortable feeling of though.

"I wonder how hard it is to graduate in two years", Uryuu speculated. "At the same time I wonder how long it will take for us to graduate."

"I bet we could do it in two years if we wanted", Grimmjow exclaimed ready for the challenge. "Or are you guys to scared to try?" He continued when he saw that nobody looked ready to do it.

"Of course I'm not", Ichigo snapped back angrily jumping into the challenge. He would not back down, he would take the challenge and at the same time he might be able to forget about his gut screaming out to him if he concentrated on something else.

A little part about him could not help wonder if he would be able to do it though, with kido and all. Would he really be able to graduate the school in two years with his kido skills? "I'm on", Ichigo exclaimed. "It sounds interesting enough." He would just have to train, a lot. Which would serve his purpose just as well.

"Maybe it's for the good", Chad said with a thoughtful expression as he opened his face as he opened his mouth for the first time in this conversation. "We have just been going around with no goal and nothing. I think it would be good for us to take this challenge and get a goal. I'm in." Ichigo totally agreed with Chad. He needed a goal, something he could focus on.

"Well, then I'm definitely in to", Uryuu said with a small laugh.

"I guess we will have to take up the challenge to", Orihime said as she looked at Nelliel with a small smile.

"Of course we will", Nelliel answered pretty excited. "I'm always ready for a challenge and like Chad said, I would like to have a goal. So what about you Uluquiorra?"

"Of course I'm in", he answered in his always so empty tone.

"Sure about that", Grimmjow said and laughed not really thinking about what he was saying. "Are you really up to it?"

"Are you kidding me", Uluquiorra retorted sarcastically. "I think the possibility of you losing is a lot bigger, which would be very hilarious. Think if you are the only one not to graduate in two years, you the one who is so sure of himself. That would be sort of funny, no?"

Nelliel just could not stop herself from laughing. She had been hanging out with Uluquiorra for so long that she long since had gotten used to his sarcastic comments and this one was actually sort of funny.

"You stupid son of a bitch", Grimmjow screamed enraged. He was always easy to anger and no somebody was laughing at him thanks to this damn roommate of his. "You wanna fight me? Cause I sure as hell wanna fight you. Or are you to freaking scared?"

"I would not mi...", Uluquiorra did not have time to say more before Nell interrupted him.

"Grimmjow, Uluquiorra stop", Nelliel said before it had time to blow up. The two of them made as if to open their mouths, but Nelliel interrupted them. "I said stop. Don't step over the line." She looked both of them into the eyes, showing what would be in for them if they didn't listen.

Nelliel was no pushover. She was really good at fighting, maybe even more gifted than one of them. Plus Uluquiorra did not want to get her really mad, she was after all the only friend he had had through the years.

Uluquiorra inclined his head and nodded. When Grimmjow saw that Uluquiorra gave in it was as if all the fire left his body. "Fuck", he mumbled to himself.

"So let's graduate in two years", Orihime said trying to get the cheerful feeling back.

"Yes", everybody but Uluquiorra and Grimmjow screamed in response at the same time as Ichigo pressed the feeling out of his head. He would live in the now. Uluquiorra just nodded while Grimmjow just growled.

Karin looked around herself and realized that she had gone here anyway. She had not wanted to. He would listen to her though, which in truth was what she needed. She had to find someone that would listen to her and talk back. Someone that would come with smart ideas and maybe be able to solve her problem. And truth to be told, he was the only one that fit all the criteria.

She opened the door and looked around the very familiar room. He was sitting in the office chair, correcting documents as always. Plus Masomoto was not in the room. Karin did not dislike Masomoto in any kind of way, she actually rather liked the woman, but she knew that when Masomoto heard some interesting gossip the entire Seretei usually knew it soon. This was not something she wanted everyone to discuss.

He did not look up from his papers, probably concentrating so much that he did not see her. He should have sensed her presence though.

He must have a lot to do to not even notice my arrival, Karin thought to herself. Still she did not want to bother him so she sat down in the oh so familiar coach and thought back to the day and her problem.

She had held her speech and everything had been fine. She had been able to ignore Ichigo and the desperate feeling of wanting to meet him, of wanting to call out to him, scold him, hug him, interact with him and just be in his comforting presence again.

Then when she and Hisagi-taicho started to leave the school they passed straight by him. She had not been more than a meter from him and she had not been able to help looking at him. Well it had been more like staring.

She had stared at his back, he stood turned away from her talking to her friends. It had only been for a brief moment but her stare had been intense with longing and she knew that he had seen it. When she had readied herself to turn back and continue walking with Hisagi-taicho his gaze had wiped back and met hers. She had been overflown with all the emotions she had been trying to suppress and her eyes had watered, even though she never cried. She had made as if to take a step towards him, but then she had realized that his eyes was void of any recognition. He was no longer her Ichi-nii.

All of that had been known to her before, but it had hurt her in a way she could not explain. It felt almost as when her mother had died. The one knowledge that she would never meet Ichi-nii again. She would see an empty shell of him. A man having a similar personality and identical look to her brother, but it would not be her brother. He would have no memories of her, of his earlier life or what he had valued the most. Nothing that made him her brother would be left but his blood and genes which was not what she had looked for. She had been looking for him for ten years and all she had found was an empty shell of his old self.

Somehow she had been able to walk out together with Hisagi-taicho, but then she had left by telling some messy excuse that she needed something somewhere. She had left flash stepping away, looking for an empty place. When she had found one she had cried for the first time in a very long time, because she did not cry. Then she had come here without really thinking about it. This was the place that felt most like home in the entire Seretei to her.

She looked up and realized that he was sitting beside her in the coach. She had not noticed him arriving, she had been to deep in thought. She looked into his eyes and for the first time she was aware of her appearance. Her hair was a mess, her eyes were bloodshot, her cheeks were puffed up and there was still tears dripping from her eyes. She looked like a mess, or like a young girl who had been crying for a while and then arrived her to desperately seek for help. She could not stand him seeing her like this.

She rose from her seat and took one step towards the door then she did not come any farther. He grabbed her hand and dragged her back to him. Even though she had become strong, managing to become a vice captain, he was still stronger than her. He usually did not show it, but he used it whenever he felt necessary. Often she got mad when he did, but this time she didn't have enough energy to care.

He pulled her towards him, into his embrace. He did not try to say anything, he never opened his mouth. The two of them just sat like that, not moving at all. He was showing her that he was there for her, which he would always be. If she needed to talk to him he would be there, if she needed someone to listen he would be there, if she needed someone to help her he would be there and if he could help her in anyway he would always try. She knew all that but he wanted to show her again and again until she would completely trusted him and knew that he would always be there with a certainty.

"Do you want to talk now Karin", he said her name like a caress. She did not know how long they had sat there, it felt like forever at the same time as it felt like no time at all had passed. She felt so much better than before. Even though she could still feel the clouds hanging over her, she no longer felt as if she would drown.

"I'm waiting", he said waking her from her thoughts making her chuckle lightly.

"I was just thinking, sorry", she answered a small sad smile on her lips.

"No problem", he said looking into her eyes. "I'm waiting. I will listen when you feel ready to talk."

"Well you see", she said after a short while. "It's got to do with the rumor surrounding Ichigo." She didn't need to say more before she saw understanding flash through his eyes. That was one of the things she loved about him, he and she understood each other, she never needed to explain a lot because he always understood her.

"Is it true", he asked silently needing some sort of confirmation even though he was almost already sure. He knew that there was few things that would upset Karin this much, but this was a reason that would probably put her in the state that she was.

"Yeah", she nodded. The two of them just sat like that in silence. He was waiting for her to feel ready to talk and she was gathering herself.

"Toshiro", she said softly. "What should I do? I really don't know what would be right."

"I don't have a perfect answer Karin", he answered her just as softly. One of the other things she really liked about him as well was that he was always honest. He did not just say something to make her feel better, he told her the truth. "I can try to help you. We can work out an answer together, but I will never be able to tell you what answer is right and wrong. I can only tell you my opinion. So what do you think about it all Karin?"

"I sort of don't know Toshiro", Karin answered a tone of desperation creeping into her voice. "I just know that it hurts. When I look at Ichigo, I still don't see Ichinii. When I meet met him today I just started to think that maybe I would never meet Ichhinii again. Ichigo, yes him I know I will meet, but not my brother. I know he is still my brother but right know he doesn't remember anything. I don't want anyone else to share my pain, so I don't want to tell anyone else."

"Always thinking about others", Toshiro said lovingly. "In that perspective you're so much like your brother. There is another alternative though. Tell Ichigo the truth, with every highseated person from the 13 protective squads supporting you he will be forced to believe you."

"I know", she answered but said no more. A few minutes passed before she opened her mouth again. "I have already thought about that, but I don't want to do that to him. He has been living here for ten years. He will have already created a new life for himself here and he truly looked happy talking to his friends. When he was in the living world he didn't look happy very often. I don't want to take this new found happiness from him."

"I thought you would say that", Toshiro told her seriously. "I just wanted to make sure you had considered all the possibilities. From what I hear though you have already decided what to do, haven't you?"

"I think so", she answered him softly. "But I don't know if that is the right choice. At the same time I don't know what else I could possibly do. I guess I will have to wait. Even though I don't know if it's the right choice I think it's for the best."

"I think waiting is a noble choice Karin", Toshiro answered. "It would be better for everyone if he remembered himself, or if he realized who he was one his on. If you are lucky something might even trigger his memory. I mean almost no souls ever truly remember their life as living person, but he is not a normal soul. The fact that he knew a lot of people in Sertei, people he will meet sooner or later might give him a bigger chance at remembering all this. I think that the chance that something might trigger his memories are pretty big."

"Thanks Toshiro", she said smiling. "You truly made me feel better and what you said make sense to. I guess only the future can tell anyway. I'm glad I talked to you anyway."

"I'm glad you talked to me", he answered looking deep into her eyes. Then the two of them just sat like that comfortable in each other presence. Only one thought flew through her head. Maybe there was some good parts to all the bad stuff that had happened, because getting to know Toshiro better was definitely a plus.

When Ichigo went to sleep that night he had hoped, prayed to get an peaceful night of sleep. After this exhausting day he really needed it. He wanted a deep sleep without any sort of dreams. As all other nights though, nobody seemed to be listening. Once more he was hunted by the same dream. The dream had come on the night after they had trained with Unohana-taicho for the first time. Then it had kept coming with smaller and smaller intervals between it. This week the dream had been coming every night.

It was dark around him, as it always was when he found himself in this particular place. There were huge shadows looming around him. He had still not been able to find out what the things that caused the shadows was. He only knew that they were humongous. They were probably the biggest things he had seen and he wondered what they would have looked like if he could see them clearly.

He started to walk around exploring the place. Wondering if he could find something new before the old man found him. The other times he had tried never found anything worth looking for, but since he had a small amount of time he might as well spend it on something that might become useful.

He did not have to walk around in the dark place for long before he heard the steps from the old man, so he stopped walking to wait him in. Neither the old man or this place really scared him anymore. With the lessons in the academy explaining about a full shinigamis powers he had soon realized what this place was. Somehow it was his inner world, and somehow the man walking towards him was his zanpakuto. There was something else that made him pray to be able to not come here.

"Ichigo", the old man said to him when he came into view. He did not have time to say anymore though because Ichigo interrupted him.

"Why did you bring me here again old man", Ichigo growled. "I thought I told you that I would need a proper night of sleep, and not a night of nightmares. Which I always get after I meet him." His tone got quieter and more desperate for ever word he said. When the word him touched his lips he was whispering, not wanting to say it too loud because he did not know if it could make him come here earlier.

"Ichigo I do not have time to argue with you", the man said in a hurried tone. "It seems as if he is late because of some reason. I will finally be able to tell you something of importance."

"Can you tell me your name", Ichigo asked hoping. None of his friends had achieved their zanpakuto yet, would he be the first?

"No", the man answered in a final tone not caring about the disappointment in Ichigos face. "That would just make him come here faster and your not ready for it anyway. There is one step before hearing the name."

"Materializing your zanpakuto", Ichigo guessed. He should have realized that.

"Yes exactly", the man said as he looked around himself as if he could pop up anytime. "If you manage to materialize me it should make the balance a little bit better here at least. I also know that you are already at the stage were you should be capable at doing it. You only have to mediate for real and really try."

Ichigo realized what he was hinting at. At yesterdays mediation lesson he had not really meditated the way he was supposed to, instead he had done the sort of control exercises that Unohana-taicho had taught them. He had convinced himself that they would be more useful since he dreamed himself here every night anyway.

"I'll do it next Saturday, when I'm supposed to", Ichigo answered not happy with the thought of having to come here more then he must. Not happy that he might have to meet him more often than necessary. "But then you have to give me at least some nights of sleep next week", he exclaimed.

"I will try", the man answered not explaining. Then they stood there in silence. The two of them waiting in the inevitable. Ichigo could sense him getting closer, could sense his presence.

"What is he anyway", Ichigo asked trying to sound as matter-of-factly as possible. "I've never heard of anything like him in any lesson. Not even Unohana-taicho who taught us control told us to be ware of something like him. None of my friends seem to have someone like him either.

"It's a long story", the man answered not wanting to explain further. "Let's just say that he was almost the same as me from the beginning. Then something happened that separated us. Something made us able to exist here at the same time, when we before could only be one at a time here. Then he got more power for reasons I can't explain. If you managed to materialize..." The zanpakuto did not have time to say anything more as he was upon them.

He came from behind one of the buildings, tearing through the old man who vanished. Ichigo had seen the old man seemingly die before, but the man had always come back alive next time he dreamed.

There before him now stood the man of his nightmares. The man was identical to him, only made in black and white. There was another difference as well, where he was black, the man was white. It was as if all their colors had been swapped.

The man looked at him and a cackling laughter escaped from his mouth.

"... is wrong", he said in a voice that made Ichigo shudder. He also could not make out the first word he was saying. "I am not the one hindering you from hearing his name. It is once more your fear that is stopping your progress." For every word he said he took a steep closer. Ichigo tried to step back, but found himself frozen in place.

"You fear that I am also part of your true zanpakuto and you want to have anything to do with a monster like me", he finished cackling once more. He stood right in front of Ichigo right now, if one of them would straighten an arm out they could touch the other. Just the thought of it made Ichigo want to sick up.

When the man stood so close to him Ichigo could truly feel his powers, they were huge. Far bigger than anything he had ever sensed before. They were also malevolent, sinister and cruel feeling, they felt a bit like the hollow they had encountered.

"Why would I want to hold you back", he began to speak again. "I want to crush you, but there would be no fun in fighting you now. No fun at all..."

The rest of the words muddled together since Ichigo finally had made himself wake up and get out of that world. It would take some time since he could get back to sleep again.

I hope you like this chapter. Please stop by and leave a review to tell me what you thought about it, constructive criticism is always welcome. I would also love if you would like to leave suggestions or favorite parings you would like to be included. Since I have not completely decided the course of the story it is quite likely that I would use it:)