A/N: Kaname is so damn confused, and it's so entertaining to write him like that XD Sorry this chapter took a lot longer to get out than I wanted it too, and I'll admit I'd been avoiding it, but with the encouragement of Aura Kuran and mdkeya86 I prevail once more!

Enjoy!

Chapter 10

"I want details on Zero Kiryuu, all of it." Kaito's voice echoed against the walls of the grandiose hall, the taping of his boot obnoxiously loud as he walked up to the desk inconveniently placed at the very end, before dumping his mission file on the awaiting mahogany.

The woman slowly shot a small glance up, looking passed the small frame of her glasses, unfazed by the obstruction tossed before her work and the harsh demand of her 'colleague' - if that's what they even were to each other.

"Good evening to you too, Kaito." She mumbled, half paying attention, as she switched her focus onto re-organising the papers thrown in her face on the neat pile sitting on the far side of the desk.

Kaito narrowed his eyes; he was in no mood for such pleasantries.

"I said I want details" He demanded, hands placed firm on the wooden surface before him, towering over her. To anyone else, he might've looked intimidating. She sighed, massaging her temples; she loathed being disturbed in the middle of something, and these people, they picked all the damn wrong times! "Now" Kaito added; voice, dangerously low.

"He was passed on to the capable hands of Kaname Kuran; that's all I'm authorised to tell you." She did not spare him a second glance, before her pen was moving back across the page in front of her.

Capable hands? Kaito almost scoffed. If the organisation called that capable, they were insane.

So that's why he's laying half dead in the bed of my apartment? He wanted to shoot back, but he stopped himself before it was too late. If they found out he wasn't with Kaname, they'd surely kill Zero without a hitch and Kaito didn't want Zero dead if he was still sane.

If it came to it, Kaito would kill Zero himself.

"And can you please tell me why Zero was left in the hands of a hunters natural born enemy?" he grated his teeth, seething. These people just didn't get it.

"Kaname knows better what he's dealing with here than we do. Zero is beyond our help now, Kaname is the only one that can save him, or at least slow down the process at the very least." There was another short period where she scrawled across the page, before stopping, seemingly in thought. "Plus, if Kaien trusts him, why can't we?" She murmured, as though she'd relayed the information a thousand times over, either that or she was just so articulately eloquent.

"Just because Kaien trusts him it doesn't meant there's no room for lies and deceit, what makes everybody so damn sure he can be trusted so easily?" Kaito averted his gaze momentarily, irritated, before turning back to her and snatching the pen out of her hand. He couldn't stand talking to people that wouldn't even look at him.

"Please, understand Kaito, there was no other choice." She paused, finally raising her gaze to meet his properly, abandoning all thoughts of work for a rare moment, not that she particularly had a choice without her pen. "What would you have done, Kaito?" Her voice softened ever so slightly, "would you have let him fall? He was my friend too, you know. This is what's best for him now."

"That's not good enough..." He murmured under his breath, fury suddenly roused within him. Why the hell was a hunter like Zero, trusted with such a wretched creature like him? "There is always another option" He thought out loud, a frown marring his generally composed features. If there wasn't another way, Kaito would always find one, no matter how impossible, or lost the cause.

"Where is Zero now, exactly?" Kaito asked, his patience wearing thin. Kaito He knew exactly where Zero was, and how bad a condition he were found in; half dead, and broken, but did these people know that?

Clearly not.

The woman shuffled under his gaze, finally showing some discomfort. "That's no longer any of the associations concern..." She trailed off a little reluctantly. They didn't know; of course they didn't know. Kaito expected nothing less. The association made him sick to his stomach. How they would disregard a comrade so easily, to give him away without as much as a second thought. Perhaps Kaito was being unreasonable here, but considering the state he'd found zero in, he was beginning to suspect something here was amiss.

Kaito rubbed at his temples in frustration, the faint clawing of a migraine scratching at the surface of his mind. "I demand to know where Kaname resides!"

"We're unaware of his current whereabouts..." She trailed off, somewhat defiantly, trying to mask the fear on her face which then morphed into that of a frown. Kaito looked as if he could kill someone within the blink of an eye, and the woman most certainly didn't miss that look that crossed his features. She didn't want to be on the receiving end of that crossbow when he was angry; that's for sure. She'd seen Kaito in one of his worst fits of rage.

Why was everyone so fucking useless? Shouldn't they have access to this kind of information? He couldn't believe they genuinely didn't know where Kuran was.

Was she trying to hide something from him?

"I think it's best you leave now, Kaito. You dropped off what you came for" She took the report from the pile, placing it in the filing cabinet behind her, before turning back to him."You have no further business here."

"You were nothing like a friend to him back then. Behind his back, you strove to get rid of him just like the rest." Her lips were set in a firm line as she stared back, choosing to ignore the accusation. Kaito stormed out before he could let his anger get the better of him, his finger so desperately itched to press the fire of his crossbow.

He left before he could misdirect his rage; rage he would save for the lord of vampires himself. If these people supposedly didn't know where the stupid pureblood was, then Kaito would just have to find out himself...

Starting from the place he'd found Zero.

Kaname POV

Delusional. He was seriously delusional. He was acting as if one had just lost their bonded partner. He wasn't bonded to Zero, he couldn't possibly be; but why did these sensations that plagued his body, plagued his conscious... why did it all feel so alike?

Why did he feel so physically and mentally connected to the person he hated most?

Was it these thoughts of having no one to take his frustrations out on anymore? More importantly, why had he been so frustrated in the first place? He had everything he wanted and more, yet, he still felt like something was missing.

Never satisfied...

Unless the 'everything' he had, just wasn't what he wanted anymore. Maybe he wanted something more. Something he just simply couldn't have; that wasn't just the code of human nature, but the very essence of vampires themselves. He scowled at the thought, pain holding his head in its agonising grasp.

Nonsense.

Kaname never had returned to the love and comfort of his sister that night. He just couldn't bring himself to face his dear beloved with a smile on his face; a smile full of only the harshest of lies and the sting of a betrayal so great.

Instead, he immersed himself in the comfort the courtyard of their house offered. The aggressive howl of the wind sent a shiver up his spine as he sat on the raised marble bench that over-looked the small outdoor space. The low rumbling of a thunder that promised rain to come relaxed him in a way that nothing else could, as he placed one leg on top of the other, his burning wine-coloured gaze finally, and fully taking the scene in; plants, of all the strangest and rare varieties, marble ornaments, statues, of the most random of things all in hopes to make the place look somewhat homely, but the only thing that truly reminded him of home here were the vines; red thorned roses that decorated every square inch of the place. The sight almost made him feel... nostalgic?

How silly.

If you play with fire Kaname, you're only bound to get burnt.

He shook his head of the odd thought, instead focusing on the way each droplet of water that began to fall from the sky, seeped into the cracks of the concrete ground beneath him. He closed his eyes, and before he knew it, its descent pounded mercilessly around him, lulling him in a state akin to comfort, yet that same feeling of comfort had its limits. The weather could only do so much for him now.

It was in that moment that his memories decided to play tricks on him, as he felt a pair of cold, desperate lips against his.

"Why did you do it?" he turned his head toward the voice, it's dangerous closeness sending a shiver up his spine, he could sense a mixture of anger, regret, and sadness. "Do you... hate me that much?"

When he finally opened his eyes, he was met with vast oceans of silver, taken aback for a slight second; he then moved to drop his eyes to drop to the smooth, lifeless amethyst of the ex-hunter's gaze.

Even in your death, you're still here... Haunting me...

"Yes" Kaname replied, a monotone exclamation, his expression vacant; a hard stone mask of nothing.

I hate you so much... For making me feel...

Like this.

"Kaname?" He blinked, only for silver to be replaced with a bright golden, and for amethyst to morph into that of an innocent green. It was the delicate, yet firm voice of his well trusted subordinate, Ichijou Takuma that surprised him most, breaking him out of his daze.

Kaname was losing it.

"Is everything alright?" The man had been with him through thick and thin, asked, as though he genuinely cared. Takuma would never turn his back on him, not that he had a choice... But if he did... Kaname could only wonder if he'd stay. It wasn't often that Kaname would think of such things, but lately, he wouldn't be surprised what turn his thoughts took anymore.

"Please, sit with me Takuma" he moved to seat silently beside his pureblood lord.

"Has something happened? You've seemed a bit off lately... It unsettles Yuki. Not just her, but all of us." Little did Kaname know, it wasn't just by obligation Ichijou cared for him.

"Takuma" He paused, wondering how to voice his thoughts. "If it wasn't something you had to do, would you still follow me? By your own will? Even if I'd done something unforgivable?"

"Of course, you're a dear friend to me Kaname."

That's all he'd needed to hear.

"I miss him Kaname" Yuuki snuggled closer to him on their shared bed, only to watch the purebloods ever present frown deepen, as her penetrating gaze burnt into his own like wildfire.

"I know you do, Yuki" Came back his tired, lifeless reply.

"Would I be able to... see him again?" Yuki avoided his gaze, hesitant in her question, as though she didn't want to anger the pureblood lord by bringing him up again and again. She knew Kaname was steadily growing tired with it, if the twitch at his eyebrow was anything to go by.

"Sorry Yuki... No one is allowed to see him right now" He lied, his face expressionless, trying to hide the internal panic that settled at the very pit of his stomach.

Why must you bring him up every time?

Yuki could feel all the emotions Kaname had been feeling recently through the bond, and such emotions only grew stronger as time progressed. Was it normal for this to happen? Was she the only one that could feel it? Right now, all she could feel was regret and panic radiating off of him in waves. It was an understatement to say that the feeling unsettled her to no ends. She could feel the very same panic envelope her entire being as she asked, "W-what is it? I-is he okay?" unable to keep herself from stumbling over her words.

"He's getting worse," Kaname paused, averting his gaze, "you won't be able to see him anymore."

"But-"

"I told you its too dangerous!" Kaname snapped, a frustrated sigh escaping his lips. He regret the words as soon as he saw the expression on her face.

She looked scared...

His face softened as he took her face in the palm of his hand, caressing the smooth skin of her cheek with his thumb. He'd hardly realised how much he was shaking.

"Please understand Yuki, how much you mean to me" he spoke with conflicting emotions in his voice, as he stared intently into deep hazel eyes. "You still don't know, do you?" a small warming smile licked at the corner of his lips as she tried to avert her gaze, but he wouldn't let her, holding her firm in place. A light shading of pink dusted over her cheeks as her eyes faded to a dark vermillion.

It had been a while, hadn't it?

"Kaname" The name came out as a sigh filled with longing as she reached out to rest a warm hand on his torso. She gently caressed the skin, shuffling closer, and nuzzling suggestively between the crook of his neck.

"Do it, if you want it Yuki" He laid back against the bed, unmoving, as she closed her eyes and with a deliberate sensual slowness, she buried her fangs deep. Only then did he let the traces of his smile drop. Yuki sucked at the skin, hungrily, and Kaname flinched at how he could feel his emotions flowing fluently through the bond, like a rough ocean current. He tried to stop it, but it was already too late. She was doing this deliberately, trying to understand, but she was looking in all the wrong places.

He was causing such an angel grief for all his stupid mistakes. He frowned, hand entwined in long strands of soft chocolate and when she could finally bring herself to pull away, she was crying. Silent tears masking her beautiful pure and innocent feminine face. All those emotions he tried so hard to keep locked up; she could feel it all through his blood that now ran through her veins. If that was enough to jerk such a tearful reaction, what could Kaname truly be feeling? She thought, her lip quivering. Kaname moved again to cup the delicate heart-shaped face in his cold hands; the hands of a killer. He wiped the vague traces of her tear trail with a calloused thumb and could only be grateful that the bond wasn't strong enough for her to sort through his memories.

What would that serve to reduce them to?

Yuki had only wanted to be intimate with her lover, in the way only vampires could, but Kaname could only gift her with his pain, the pain that was his cause, the pain she should never have the misfortune to experience.

His dear princess... What have I done?

"Why Kaname?" She paused. Looking into those dark wine-coloured orbs she thought she knew so well. "Why do you feel such pain?"

"Is it truly bad living with me? Do you regret it at all? Do you hate this?" She said dragging her hand in a slow movement down his bare arm.

New tears began to fall.

"Please Yuki" His voice came out a lot firmer than he felt. "Please" but then he felt his voice quiver desperately "Don't cry"

Kaname gently settled her down on the bed, before towering over her, embracing his doll in his arms. "Please Yuki." She was still as he held her close. A single tear escaped his dark iris, landing on her tanned cheek; the first and the last. A crack in such a well-build facade.
It wasn't the same neck beneath his lips as he desperately caressed the surface of her skin. The vein pulsated beneath his tongue, an anticipation, that if not even wanted, would still be present by the force of vampire instincts. She parted her lips in a silent sob, as traced the entire length of her neck.

It wasn't the same sweet blood filling his mouth with every gulp he took from the girl beneath him. It wasn't the same emotions he felt, the anger, the frustration, the mercilessness; it was all absent, replaced with a love that seemed so out of place.

It wasn't the same rough, pale skin he unclothed, bit by bit and it most certainly wasn't the same arousal he felt, nor the same warmth he pounded into as the form shook and writhed beneath each, not quite so gentle ministration.

Kaname was slowly losing himself.

Once such a perfect facade... What was it now?

Where had it gone?

"Please" He panted, realising it wasn't the same body fixed beneath his muscular form, not the same carnal desire wracking his senses, but instead just a forced gentleness, in hopes he wouldn't break the fragile body.

It wasn't the same slender, unbreakable form lay beneath him.

This was different.

It wasn't Zero.

He was with the wrong person.

Zero POV

Darkness... It was that darkness he welcomed and relaxed in, and the same darkness that struck that all too familiar fear. A fearful darkness he knew all too well. While one side of his heart longed to be embraced by the shadows, the other half longed for freedom, that same escape he could never truly be granted; not really, anyway.

He struggled uncomfortably, not being able to see a thing, as he tried to break the sudden haze that suffocated his senses. His entire body froze and he ceased all movement when he heard the brief clinking of... chains?

Fucking chains... He wouldn't be surprised if they followed him all the way to his grave, he thought with dark sarcasm. He yanked at the force that held him captive, as he tried to see through the endless dark, but all thoughts of trying to escape vanished as he began to choke on the very thin of air. His priority was getting oxygen in his lungs as he gasped for his life. It was like he'd been thrown into a vacuum where any hope of breathing was non-existent.

As if things couldn't get any worse, the sudden intense throbbing pain in his chest spread like wildfire around his body, igniting each and every one of his limbs with the flame of its fury.
It was a pain he would never forget, for the person that had caused him such pain, had burnt their very existence into his mind and body.

"Zero!" He groaned desperately at the sound of the voice breaking through the spell that hung over him, and Zero thrashed around frantically seeking its source. "Zero- Wake up damn it!"

"K-Kaname!" He screamed, as he panted for air, bolting upright as he broke free of the dark spell, opening his eyes to the blinding light of day, and a very worried looking Kaito. The memory of the pain still singed his body with every brash movement, but that didn't stop him from collapsing with relief on his pillow, as he still gasped for air. Zero's entire body was soaked with sweat, it was as if he'd just taken a dip in a pool and got back into bed. Beads of sweat ran down his forehead, a light tickle against his skin, but he didn't care about lying in a puddle of his own perspiration. He could breath. And right now, that was all that he cared about.

He almost jumped up again at the sudden coldness that took place on his forehead, like a block of ice against his scorching skin. It didn't take him long to discern it as a wash cloth.

"It's okay Zero, calm down," he relaxed at the sound of that voice. It was the voice that saved him. He closed his eyes again, relaxing under the coolness of the cloth.

"K-kaito" His voice croaked, throat as dry as sandpaper.

"I'm here now... you'll be fine." Kaito soothed him, taking away the wet cloth and bathing it in a bowl of cold water before gently placing the cloth back against his forehead.

It seemed that even in his false sense of freedom his dreams would be back to haunt him, hurling him back to that one place, that one person that he loathed so much.

His nightmares would always be there reminding him of where he truly belonged.

Zero held his eyes closed, and Kaito waited for his breathing to calm down as he watched the soft rise and fall of his chest. Zero opened dulled amethyst orbs, and in that moment; zero looked so much older, tired, a man who'd thought a thousand wars alone, both emotionally and physically without a wink of sleep, or a small space of well needed rest.

Those amethyst orbs stared straight through him, as if he weren't even there.

"You said his name" Kaito frowned. "Zero... What has he done to you?" Zero mirrored that frown, breaking his eye contact and turning away. Silence filled the space between them. Zero couldn't talk about it even if he wanted to and it only made him ask the same question...

What has he done to me?

A/N: I hate Yuki too, but that scene was necessary, I intended to make it a lot longer too, but figured I shouldn't in case people start hating on me, haha. XD
eh, I really wasn't sure how I wanted to end the chapter but that will suffice.
Hope you liked it, please take the time to review and tell me what you think :)