I woke up that morning feeling invincible. For the first time in my life I made love and no I am not a virgin. Everyone who knows me can tell you that, even my mother although she pretends not to know but being with Marley was different. It wasn't to satisfy myself but to fill the emptiness that I have in my chest. Marley Rose completes me. She makes me feel whole and normal but she's gone.

I look around my surrounding and I'm trying to see if she's anywhere near me but it's like she was never here. If my sheets didn't smell like I would think it was just a dream. I throw my covers away from my body and jump out of bed. I try to see if I see her clothes or something but there is nothing.

I slip my boxers on and chuckle. She must be embarrassed. I lean out the window and my heart stops. The room is empty. It almost feel like I can't breathe but I am. Thoughts are rushing through my brain and before I know it I'm almost punching a whole through 's door.

"Jake?" she ask as she opens the door.

"Where is she?" I ask. The words come out in a spat and I'm being loud. I am angry and I can't control myself.

"Jake…" she repeates my name but I yell out again.

By now everyone is outside, watching us. No one moves and I yell out again. "WHERE IS SHE!?"

"JAKE!" someone yells and it's not . It my mom. She looks mad and mortified but I don't care.

"I asked you a question, where is she?!" I asked again.

"She's gone!" she yells back in my face. I stand there stunned. She's gone.

The world starts to move in slow motion and my body feels heavy. Why am I feeling like this? Why do I feel so numb?

My mom grabs my shoulder and drags me back home. I watch hide her face between her hands and sob as my mother yells at me, telling me I'm grounded.

Now I sit in my room, just staring at the floor. Part of me hopes that she's going to pop her head out the window and into my room and giggle but 's words ring in my head. She's gone.

Angry I stand up and kick the first thing that is in my way. The night stand flies off and hits the wall and that's when I see something. It's a piece of paper I haven't seen before.

I am careful to pick it up and as I open it I can hear my heartbeat in my ears. I read the whole thing. Over and over and over again until I know it by heart. She's sick. She's dying and now words are even heavier than they were before.

Did she mean…?

I hear a crack from my side and I turn my head to face who is standing before me. Her eyes are red and puffy from crying and I'm afraid that I have caused more damage that I ever thought I would.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked.

"I tried but she didn't want to" She explained. "The day that you guys went to the beach we begged her to tell you. We saw how much you loved her. We could see how you were wanting more but she refused. She was afraid you would stop loving her the way you did"

Love her? Did I love Marley Rose?

I do love Marley Rose and I never got to tell her.

"Did she…?" I asked and she shakes her head. "Not yet at least" she adds. I relax and clench in just a matter of seconds. Does that mean…?

"Marley and her mother were driving back home when Marley took a turn to the worst. They're in the hospital a town over but the doctors say it might be it" She says and I have a urge to laugh.

It. She calls death it. I would imagine someone her age would not fear death anymore but then again she is not facing it. It's Marley. A seemingly healthy 17 year old girl and just like that I don't want to laugh anymore. "I have to see her" I urge and she shakes her head.

"I don't think that…"

"I have to tell her Mrs. Rose" I say. "She can't go without knowing how I feel about her. She has to know" I say.

She stares at me for a second before she lowers her head. "Okay Jake. I'll take you to her" she says and leaves my room.

I go after her and we drive. The drive there is silent and painful. I try to prepare myself for what I'm about to see but I'm not sure what I am going to see. I'm not even sure how to react to the situation I am currently putting myself in.

I try to think of something to say but seems to rehearsed or if I should smile and pretend there is nothing wrong with her but I don't know. For the first time in my life I am clueless. There is nothing I can think of that would make this better. There is nothing I can do to make it better. It just is what it is.

When we part the pit of my stomach flips. It's a horrible feeling and it makes me nauseous but I don't say anything. I hid my shaking hands on my pocket and we walk in.

I sit in the waiting room while talks to Marley's mom. She's trying to convince her to let me in and as much as I want to go up to her and tell her that I NEED to see Marley I don't move.

Finally her mom lowers her head, just like Mrs. Rose had done when I asked and nods.

I lick my lips and stand up. It's time.

Her mom offers me a smile as she places her hand on my back and directs me to the room. The whole place smells like alcohol and something else. It's making me sick and part of me just wants me to go. Convince this is some kind of twisted dream.

We stand in front of a door that says 162. I look at her mom and she smiles again. She's been crying for a while. Maybe the whole summer. Maybe she will never stop.

"Make her happy again" she whispers before she leave me.

I lower my head and try to take a deep breath when a muffled sound catches my ears. I look up and hear myself on the other side of the room. I'm singing. And then I hear her.

We're singing. We're singing our song.

I open the door and the sound blast out the room. My surrounding are nothing and everything I imagined. She's laying on a hospital bed looking pale and almost asleep. She looks tired but a tired I've never seen before.

It takes her a couple of seconds to turn her head to look at me. "Jake" she says weakly and lifts her hand to lower the sound of the ipod.

"You recorded us?" I ask as I shut the door and come closer. She nods and looks at me with her deep green eyes.

"I was afraid that you would be mad" she answers the question we both know I want to ask. "Are you?"

"No" I say and sit near her.

She smiles and sigh contently. "Good. It's my favorite"

There is a silence between us but not in the room. The machines that are hooked to her are beeping every few seconds, the low whisper of the radio still plays along and the harsh sound of her breath fills the room.

"Why didn't you tell me before?" I ask.

"I was afraid" She answers.

"But we could have done more. We could have made it worth it" I say and she laughs quietly before she coughs.

"There is nothing I could have done to make it better" she says. "I know you think that setting goals and doing them before you die is what you should do but it's not for me. I don't want to travel. I don't want to meet a famous person. I want to live but that's not an option. At least not for a very long time" she says and I shake my head.

"It's not fair" I say and she slides her head to me.

"No one said it was" she said. "You helped me so much Jacob Puckerman" she says and holds out her head for me to take and I do. "You made me live this summer. You made me feel normal and alive and I thank you for that" she said.

"But…"

"There is no but. It's the end. That's just it" she says and I lower my head, pressing my forehead against her cold hands. There is silence again between us but it doesn't last long. "Did you read my letter?" she asks.

"Yes" I answer and I can feel her smile.

"Good" She says and breath in deeply.

I don't know how but I can feel her slipping away. It's like she half here, waiting and I don't want her to go. I'm not ready for her to leave me.

I want her to stay. I want her to live but it's like she said. It's the end.

I slowly stand up and push her a bit to the side to make some space for myself. Her eyes open and closes again and again, as if she just can't keep the open and I know it's about any minute. I lay beside her and I wrap my arms around her frame. I should have woken up to her like this morning. I should have had her in my arms and protect her from everything that was bad but I was too late.

I hear the door open behind me and the machines are starting to make a lot more noise. My world slows down again and I move my lips to her ear. "I love you Marley Rose" I whisper and she smiles.

"I love you too Jake"

I wish that wasn't the end but it was. I would go through life with the memory of the summer I found love with Marley Rose. How I would eventually move on. Make something of myself. Find someone loves me. Have a family and make my life whole but I know that it should have been her by my side.

I might be 17 years old but I know I met my soulmate. I know she was the one who was suppose to be with me to end of times. Sadly I was late on meeting her and now I have to wait until I can see her again. I still don't know a lot of things but if there is one thing Marley Rose taught me was to live. Life is short and before you know it, it comes to an end.