Chapter 10: Paine

So many things were on my mind; I couldn't concentrate and decided not to go back to the Machine Faction at the moment. I just wanted some time alone so I stopped by a private area at the Moonflow and sat by the bank. I needed to pull myself together.

I kept thinking about Rikku, even though I didn't want to. She was on my mind all the time. I thought a lot about us being together and how I would be so happy to finally have her. If only she loved me back…

I couldn't help but feel pure hatred for Darren. I've wanted her for so long but it's over now. She's with him and there is nothing I can do about it. I hated this. I hated feeling so hopeless and empty. Rikku wasn't around anymore. She didn't want to come back to the Machine Faction. She didn't want to be around me.

I wanted to break down right now; I wanted this to stop torturing me so much. Damn her. I loved everything about little Rikku; her smile, her cuteness. She was always so bouncy and cheerful. I wondered what she was doing right now. I wanted… I wanted her to come back to me but I knew it wasn't going to happen.

I felt bad… for leaving her there crying.

No. Fuck that. I hated what she was doing to me. She hurt me and they both deserve each other anyways.

I just… I just… "DAMN IT I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!" I yelled out into the empty space. At least I thought it was empty; I thought I was alone…

"Something wrong?" Paine questioned, walking over to me.

"Uhhh… well Dr. P… why don't you tell me why you're here and why you were sneaking up on me? Aren't you supposed to be in Besaid?"

"Aren't you supposed to be at the Machine Faction?"

"Must you always answer my questions with questions???" I replied, noticing that I was sort of doing the same.

She laughed.

"Same goes for you. Anyways, I was looking for Rikku. Yuna wanted me to check up on her after the party to see if she was all right. We were both pretty worried about why she suddenly changed her mind and ran off like that. Hmmm…well I guess she just wanted to spend more time with you."

I nodded and looked back at Paine. She had a small grin on her face.

"I really think that you two should stop fooling around and just tell her how you feel! Rikku wouldn't hurt you…"

"She already has…" I looked away.

"What?" She stated in disbelief. "You told her how you felt…?"

"Well… no… not really but…"

"But what?"

"She loves someone else…" I had just realized how painful it was to say that and to know that she didn't love me back. I just wanted to give up and move on… find another girl maybe. But can I? I have never even thought of being with anyone other than Rikku.

"No, that can't be right…" Paine drifted off.

"I saw it Paine! Yesterday… they kissed, they left, and she doesn't even want to come back to the Machine Faction!"

"It doesn't mean anything…" She replied, stuttering a bit. She looked like she wanted to withdraw what she had just said.

"What are you talking about? You're acting strange Dr. P… is there something I don't know?"

"Uh…Why are you giving up so easily? It's not like you…" She snapped back, ignoring my question.

I sighed and explained everything that happened last night, at the party, after, and what had just happened a few moments ago; what Rikku had said to me.

"You really messed up."

"Thanks Dr. P… just what I needed to hear." I said with sarcasm.

"Everything will be fine Gippal, just don't give up on her." Paine said in a calm and cool tone.

"What do you know? Didn't you hear what I said? She hates me and she loves Darren, I just need to learn to accept that… you too Paine."

"Gippal! Stop saying that, you're acting completely hopeless! I thought you loved her."

"I am and I do! Damn it Paine!" I yelled in frustration. It was impossible. I don't think I could ever get over Rikku. I'd just want her more and more everyday. I'd miss her so much if she didn't come back. I don't know what to do.

"She's just confused… and hurt. You said some pretty nasty things. I think… she may have feelings for you but Darren is also her friend. I don't think she wants to hurt him, and at the same time… has mixed feelings towards you. I mean… just maybe she felt the same way about you but after what you said she might try to deny them… you know…" Paine drifted off.

"Huh? Dr. P where are you getting this? There's something I don't know isn't there??" I scratched the back of my head. Man… I have never been this confused.

"I…" She looked away.

"Paine… what is it? If it's about Rikku, I really need to know…"

She remained silent.

"Come on Dr. P!! I really need to know…"

"I thought you gave up?"

"Paine!" I shouted impatiently.

"Well?"

"I… I don't know… I still care about her. I love her so much…" I admitted. I can't stay away from her, even if she is with Darren. I wanted to forget about her, both of them, but I knew that I really wanted to be with her.

Paine was just standing there, silent. I think she saw the hurt in my eyes. Deep inside I was tearing apart, knowing that I loved Rikku so much but the love was never returned to me, but instead, to someone else.

"Gippal…" She put a comforting hand on my shoulder. I just looked away, trying to hold back the pain.

"You know why Rikku was upset that night… the night of Yuna's party?" The question was for me. Did I know? I didn't… I never found out. I think Paine was about to answer it for me though, so I remained silent and nodded.

"Rikku is going to kill me for this…but I know you're both hurting and I also know that this is for the best." She commented and sighed, and continued on.

"You know… she really missed Yuna but she also wanted you to go after her that night. She thought that… maybe if you felt the same way you would beg her not to go and if that happened, she would feel better telling you…" She paused again, still looking away from me.

"Felt the same way?… Tell me what? Paine please… I need to know."

"She loves you."

"What?" I couldn't believe what I just heard. I was shocked, and excited at the same time.

"You don't get it?" She turned around and faced me again. "I said…she loves you. I was hoping that you'd hear it from her and not me… but if you just keep going after her you'll hear it from her… soon. That's why I keep telling you not to give up. You would be risking letting go of something you've always wanted."

"Paine… is this all true? You're not just saying this to make me feel better are you?"

"Why don't you find out for yourself?" She smiled and spoke with confidence. I knew from this that Paine was telling the truth; if she was asking me to find out. I know she would never risk setting me up to get hurt.

"Thank you, Paine."

"You know what to do next. I should get back now, Yuna needs my help planning her wedding. Oh and… do me a favor and tell her to turn on the Commsphere… she needs to help out Yuna too; when she gets back to the Machine Faction of course." She said with even more confidence, walking away.

"I'll see to that." I assured Paine.

My heart was pounding. I felt so relieved… and happy. She loved me all along. I wanted to run up to her and hold her; tell her everything right now. I just wanted us to be together. I wanted her to know that I love her too, and that I'd always be there for her.

I regretted all the things I had said and done.

Suddenly my happiness turned to guilt. I was grateful that she loved me back. But now, I wish I hadn't left her alone, and that I just stayed with her; to hold her in my arms and comfort her. But I wasn't there. I left her there crying because I was jealous. I was angry that she would want to be with that scum, and that he had her. But he didn't. It took me this to realize I was being selfish.

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OUT OF GIPPAL'S POV:

Rikku woke up in Darren's bed.

What am I doing in Darren's bed?… and owwiie…I have such a bad headache!

The last thing she remembered was crying and falling asleep in Darren's arms when he came to pick her up.

All she wanted to do was go back to Gippal. She tried to get up from the bed but a pair of arms forcefully pushed her back down.

"Hey beautiful." She heard Darren say and started blushing.

"Hi…"

"How are you feeling?" Darren asked.

"Umm I got this really big headache… probably from Gippal. He's such a jerk…" She sighed and watched Darren get up to look for something in his drawers.

Why is he so mean to me...?! He obviously finds too many flaws in me, but can't he understand that nobody is perfect? Or maybe, there's just something really wrong with me…

Rikku's eyes started watering but she fought back her tears.

"Here, try this… it might help" She got up and walked over to him, taking the pills from him. Who knows what they were.

A grin crept up his face as he watched Rikku swallowed them down.

"Feeling any better?" He asked.

"I guess… I'm just a bit… sleepy."

Rikku's eyes darkened, suddenly looking lifeless. She became unconscious, but still awake; like a zombie.

"Come here babe." Darren ordered.

She obeyed; like a doll under his control, and walked over to his bedside. He gently maneuvered her on top of his lap.

He took out a box containing feminine clothing and began undressing her; then dressing her back again with a short lacey black and pink dress.

"We're going to have some fun." He grinned widely, kissing her cheek.

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AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Oh no… Darren is such a sicko ;; Meh, I had other plans for this fic but I've been reading other GippalxRikku fics and they kind of got my idea before I could post mine =( So, I'm changing mine around a bit, but don't worry, it's better than what I had planned ;P This chapter is lengthier, I hope I didn't rush it much oo; I wanted to get it in ASAP.

Reviews please?! XD;

Appreciated.