Disclaimer: DON'T OWN IT!

Zola ran as fast as she could, trying to make it all the way to Alex's house, but finding it nearly impossible.

She reached Seattle Grace- Mercy West when she fell to her knees and began to sob into her hands.

Ryan had seemed so normal and cool. She really enjoyed spending time with him, and yet she could barely control herself.

All she could think about was the journal and the video of her parents with her when she first learned how to walk.

She slowly looked up and slipped out the diary, curling her knees to her chest and resting her head against the brick wall on the side of the building.

He was looking at me.

I could feel his very stare leaking in through my bones and causing my heart to race.

I couldn't take the feeling of Derek Shepherd looking at me.

And suddenly, it was like I couldn't breathe.

I pulled away and told Finn I needed some air and that I would be back.

As I began to run down the hallway, I felt as if I might throw up.

That's when I heard the footsteps behind me and a voice calling my name.

Through my ringing ears, I would know that voice anywhere.

I stepped into a lab room and glared as the door opened and shut behind me and Derek Shepherd stalked in.

He asked me if I was alright.

Yeah, as if!

"I'm not alright! Our dog died! And you called me a whore! And you're looking at me! Stop looking at me!" I commanded.

Derek narrowed his eyes. "You think I want to look at you?" he hissed. "That I wouldn't rather be looking at my wife? I'm married! I've got commitments! She doesn't drive me crazy! She doesn't make me sick to my stomach thinking about my veterinarian touching her with his hands. Man! I would give anything not to be looking at you."

And there it was- the confession.

He still thought about me too.

And with his face so close to mine, I could barely breathe.

I turned to him, all breathless and upset and that's when he crashed his lips to mine, and he kissed me in such a way that my knees felt weak.

"Zola?" Zola's eyes shot up from the diary and she found Tuck standing before her. "Are you alright?"

Zola shook her head, biting her lip. It was now dark outside. Her phone rang helplessly in her pocket, but she ignored it.

He extended his hand to her and helped her up. "Come on. Let's get you home."

Zola weakly followed after him, leaning against him as they walked to his car.

...

As Tuck drove, Zola stared out the window, imagining having that type of love that her mother talked about.

The kind that made you broken-hearted.

You never felt like with Kyle. In fact, they were done within a night.

She wanted that love and she was determined to get it. She just didn't know how.

"So..." Tuck started. "What was a pretty girl like you doing sitting on the ground in the dark like that?"

Zola blushed but it was hidden by the thick blackness that the night brought with it. "Crying," she admitted.

"Why?" Tuck prodded and then froze. "I'm sorry. You don't have to answer that."

Zola just shrugged. "I couldn't even tell you Tuck. I have no idea."

She could feel her eyes closing and she gave into them.

She dreamt of a woman who had the most beautiful, comforting smile.

The woman held her finger to her lips and whispered, "Shh."

Zola gasped and her eyes shot open. Tuck was just parking the car in front of her house, and his eyes glanced towards her.

"Good morning," he teased.

Zola rolled her eyes and they felt dry and small from all of the crying earlier.

"Zola, I know you go to college in New York. My mom told me. So what are you doing back here in boring old Seattle?"

Zola narrowed her eyes. "It's not boring," she hissed. "It's home. Or at least... it's where I grew up."

Tuck nodded. "So, what do you do for fun?"

"Small talk? Really?" Zola shrugged, smirking. "Not much really. I don't have a whole lot of hobbies."

"None?" Tuck raised an eyebrow. "You don't sound very exciting."

Zola's eyes widened. "Screw you," she muttered but a smile appeared on her lips anyway.

"One thing," Tuck prodded. "Name one hobby you have."

"I don't know. I like reading I guess. And I like music."

Tuck sighed. "What do you want to do with your life?"

"What are you doing? Quizzing me? I want to be a lawyer."

"Really? Why?"

"What do you mean 'why?' I just want to."

Tuck nodded. "It sounds like you need to get out more."

There was no more smile on Zola's face. She just crossed her arms and pouted.

"You need to mind your own business."

"I mean it Zola," Tuck sighed. "All you seem to do is complain and feel sorry for yourself. I know what happened to your parents and I'm sorry. And if there is anything else going on, I am sorry for that too. But life can't be this miserable."

"I'm not miserable," Zola insisted.

"Going to a bar and getting drunk and crying behind a hospital the next day doesn't say happy. It says mental."

"Damn you!" Zola hissed.

"I am just trying to help," Tuck said softly.

"Well you aren't!"

Zola opened the car door and climbed out, slamming it behind her.

She ran for the front door, freezing only wen she realized she left the diary sitting inside the car.

She quickly spun around surprised to see Tuck holding it out an open car window.

Zola yanked the book out of his hand and moved back to the house, unlocking the door and stepping inside.

Zola didn't stop walking until she wound up in her room, sitting on the edge of the bed, grasping the only connection she still had left to her mother.

This kiss was better than any other kiss we had ever shared.

It was all touching and feeling. Clothing was removed hastily.

The entire time, all i could focus on was him. His soft lips. His warm hands...

We had barely gotten our clothing off and we still found a way to do exactly what was on both of our minds.

Being with him like this again made me forget everything else in the world.

I didn't think about Finn who was waiting for me on the dance floor or Derek's wife who was sickeningly nice and evil all at once.

All I thought about was him and how he was making me feel and that beautiful smile on his face.

And then I stopped thinking altogether.

A/N: I was planning on writing more, but I couldn't help but end it right there. I also had to stop writing before it reached rated M lol. Please review for a quick update. And also, let me know what you think of the two boys that I have introduced into this story.