Chapter 10: 'Nostalgia'
A/N: Okay I know it's taken me ages to update but there's a bunch of reasons why and I'm not going to go into my personal life on here, so please just tell me off, I deserve it xD btw, please review! (Please note that Cat is intentionally slightly OOC for the very first part of this chapter, but soon goes back to normal.)
OH! Disclaimer, I'll copy and paste this onto every chapter: I don't own shit.
Cat's POV: She's so beautiful. Everything about her is just so flawless. I could spend hours, days, weeks just examining her, and always be stunned by her never ending beauty.
I've felt this way about her ever since I discovered what love is all those years ago. It almost destroyed me when she started dating one of our best friends, it was about half way through high school, and she'd been dating him ever since. I expected it to only be a short relationship, I didn't think Jade had the capacity to stay with just one person for such a length of time, after all those one night stands she had with nameless faces.
I always was the only one she would tell about all her experiences, hearing such things would break my heart, but I was her best friend, and I loved her, so I would just swallow my sadness and share her happiness, or comfort her when things didn't go her way. She would always do the same thing for me of course, no matter what she always shielded me from harm. I always felt that I relied on her more than she relied on me, she was the only person I truly needed in my life. Other people would come and go, but Jade was my first real friend, and my first love, I needed her in my life forever.
At first I tried to fight the building urge to love her, there was no way I could be gay. And there was definitely no way I could be in love with my best friend. I tried dating a few boys to convince myself it wasn't real, if I was gay my parents would disown me, and if Jade found out that I love her then things might change, what if she starts to distance herself from me? I couldn't lose her, it really would kill me. All of my 'relationships' with boys soon ended anyway, I quickly realised that I didn't even like whichever random boy I was dating, and my mind always wandered back to Jade.
I was in denial. But I eventually came to accept it, I had no choice, my mind became tired of struggling against it, my heart won the fight every time.
Freak the freak out -
"Hey Jade!" I squealed, to which both her and the guy she was talking to cringed a little, but neither one passed a comment.
"Oh hey there Cat." Jade turned to me with a genuine smile, before turning her head back toward the boy she was previously talking to. The boy was a tall, well – built guy, with dark hair, a slight shadow of stubble, tanned skin and chiselled features. The best looking guys always wanted to talk to Jade. Ugh.
"Who's this?" I motioned to the boy with a smile, clearly interrupting their conversation, granted I did it accidentally, but I was happy that I did.
"This," Jade turned to me with a cheeky smile, "Is Mark McAllen."
"Oh! That's the guy who's supposed to be an amazing kisser right?!" I shouted without really realising how embarrassing it was.
"Hi, yeah, that's apparently me." The guy held out his hand toward me with a sparkly smile, I shook his hand and then he went back to talking to Jade.
"So Jade, what are you doing Friday night?" He said in a flirtatious tone at the beautiful girl stood next to me, as if I wasn't even there.
"Uh, I'm busy Friday night, sorry." Jade said, avoiding the question. I decided to pipe up on her behalf.
"Yeah aren't you going to the movies with Beck on Friday?" I said without thinking, but again, I was glad that I did say it, because it deterred this boy from asking Jade out.
"Oh, who's Beck?" Mark asked.
"Beck is Jade's boyfriend, he has great hair." I said to Mark, trying to intimidate him, all the while feeling Jade's glare burn a hole into the side of my head, I knew I was going to get it when this guy left.
"Oh, well that's a shame." The guy looked slightly disappointed but maintained a smile.
"How about our other friend Tori, she'll wanna go out with you!" I said with a smile, hopefully this would fully steer the boy away from Jade. I felt a little mischievous doing so, but it wasn't only because of my feelings for her, Beck was my friend too, and it wasn't fair for her to be flirting with this other guy.
"Oh Tori Vega right? She's hot." The guy said with a hopeful smile.
"Sure, here's her number, you should ask her out." I leaned over and wrote Tori's phone number on a piece of paper then handed it to Mark with a slightly guilty smile. I knew that Jade wouldn't say anything about my actions until he had gone because he knew she had a boyfriend now, so he was already out of her grasp.
"Thanks a lot, I'll call her tonight." And with that the guy left. I then reluctantly turned to the amazing girl sat next to me, to be reminded that she was burning me with her gaze.
"Really Cat? Really?!" Jade began to tell me off.
"What?" I said, looking into my lap, I hated it when Jade shouted at me.
"You just had to come along and ruin that for me? What the fuck was that about?" I was already holding back tears, Jade could shake my foundations so easily with her words.
"I'm… I'm sorry." I struggled to say, my voice cracking. A single tear escaped and was cascading down my cheek. I saw, in my peripherals, Jade look around to see if anyone was there, before grabbing me into a hug.
"I'm sorry too, I don't wanna make you cry Cat. But just think before you speak okay?"
"Okay…" I whispered. I loved getting the special treatment. Jade was staying at my house for a few nights while her Dad and Stepmother were having a few days off of work, and Jade couldn't stand to be around them that much, so after that we left school together, Jade as always drove me home, but obviously this time she parked up and came into my house too. On the way home in the car I had text Tori to let her know that Mark McAllen was gonna call her tonight, to which she responded very happily.
I love to make people happy.
"Hey miss V!" Jade yelled to my Mom as she walked in, same as always.
"Hey there girls!" My Mom shouted back, I loved how my family always got on so well with Jade. It sucked that if they ever discovered my feelings for Jade, would definitely not approve. Because it was like being the only one who knew that my friendship with Jade was on a crash course no matter what happened. It was so hard to 'just be friends' with her, it toyed with my feelings for every second of every day.
But on the flipside, if we did end up getting together by some miracle, my parents wouldn't approve, and the friendship, as well as possibly the relationship would be destroyed.
Finally, the worst case scenario that I didn't even want to contemplate, the possibility of rejection by Jade, she didn't want to be with me, and now our friendship is awkward and we're not going to be as close anymore.
The way I see it, there is no good way out of this situation. But Frankie would always try to help me wherever he could, everytime Jade was at our house, he tried to convince me to tell her.
"Just tell her Cat, it's your only plausible option." Frankie whispered to me. It was around 3am and I had walked into his room for a chat, I did this quite often, Frankie and I were really close and he could always make me feel reassured no matter what the situation.
"I can't Frankie, she has Beck." I replied.
"So what? She's bi right?"
"I'm pretty sure she is yeah, but she'd never admit it." I looked up to see Frankie's silhouette in the dark room.
"So there's a chance, and definitely a good one, I mean, who in their right mind wouldn't want to be with you, you're so sweet and thoughtful Cat." Frankie was really level – headed when it came to me, normally he's totally crazy, but no matter what he always looks after me, as long as he's taking his medication of course.
"Thanks Frankie, but it's just not that easy. She still has a boyfriend either way, and even if she didn't what about Mom and Dad?" I looked back down where I was playing with my hair uncomfortably.
"Okay fine, but when she breaks up with her boyfriend, you're telling her how you feel, and that's final. Secondly, I'll handle Mom and Dad, you don't have to worry yourself about it."
"Thanks Frankie." I genuinely felt pretty reassured. I hugged Frankie and went to get back in bed with Jade.
"Owww. Owww I'm so scared!"
"Try to relax, everything is going to be alright." Andre said to me in his character's accent.
"You have to get me to a doctor." My character replied, my heart was actually beating pretty fast, I always got really into character when I performed a scene and so I was actually pretty scared.
"Shhh! If that spider bites your eyeball you could die in minutes!"
"Oh man! Please get it off my eye!" I wasn't sure if I was saying the words or if my character was saying the words anymore, but I meant them.
"I'm going to try, now shh. Don't move, and don't, make, a sound." I was so focused on the metal Andre was holding that was about to touch my eye that the second I heard the sharp sound that I soon realised was a cell phone, I screamed and shoved Andre away.
"Oh man the ringing is back!" Sikowitz shouted, hitting himself in the ear. I was really paying attention, I was still pretty much in a state of shock.
"Sikowitz!" Beck and Jade managed to get his attention.
"Yes?" Sikowitz said, seeming pretty unnerved himself.
"That was a phone." Robbie told him. Sikowitz more or less returned back to reality immediately as he heard these words.
"Whooos-a." Sikowitz dragged out his syllables, seemingly not very happy at the disruption.
"Mine-s." Tori piped up.
"Tori!" Sikowitz raised his voice slightly.
"I swear I thought I had it on vibrate." She pleaded.
"Class is no place for swearing or vibrating." I couldn't hold back a giggle when Sikowitz said that, but I quickly hid it, I felt guilty giggling at something unclean like that.
"Maybe we should start the scene over." I heard Andre say beside me.
"Can we?" I agreed, I really wanted to show my acting off to everyone. Especially Jade.
"No Cat it's too late, by now that spider would have bitten your character's eyeball and you'd be dying a spastic, painful death." The words shocked me.
"Thanks a lot Tori." I shouted to her, I can't believe she'd be so inconsiderate.
"Well we have about 4 minutes left." Sikowitz looked at his wrist even though he wasn't wearing a watch. "Why don't we chat about our weekend plans? Robbie I assume you have none." Again I giggled, I felt sorry for Robbie as he struggled for words, clearly embarrassed that even the teacher knew how he had no social life.
"I don't." Robbie finally answered.
"Rex?" Sikowitz moved on.
"Gonna partay with a couple of girls from Northridge." Rex responded. I hated Northridge girls.
"Northridge girls? That should be an adventure." Sikowitz responded with a chuckle.
"What can I say?" Rex said, seemingly pleased with himself.
"Hey! Guess what Jade and I are doing tonight!" I jumped up without thinking. I was just so excited to be spending the time with Jade that I had to tell the rest of the class. When no one answered I decided to continue anyway. "There's this new place in Los Feliz, it's called Karaoke Dokie, and they have singing competitions on the weekends, so Jade and I are gonna do a song." I motioned to Jade with a genuine smile, I loved to sing with Jade, she was so amazing at it.
"I'm picking the song!" Jade quickly made everyone aware of this, to which I had obliged.
"Jade's picking the song!" I exclaimed, I love it when she's demanding with me. After that Robbie asked if he and Rex could come to sing too, my first reaction was to be irritated that Jade and I wouldn't be spending the time alone, but come to think of it she'd no doubt bring Beck along anyway. It was cute how Robbie always wanted to be around me.
"I wish I could go to Karaoke Dokie." Tori broke my train of thought.
"Why can't you?" Beck followed up hastily, much to Jade's displeasure.
"Who cares why she can't?" This led to what would have been an argument had Sikowitz not broken it up by calling Jade a gank.
Jade and Beck's arguments were my guilty pleasure, I felt bad for wanting them to happen and enjoying them, since I never wanted anything to harm Jade, and the arguments almost always lead to her crying on my shoulder when no one was watching. But I enjoyed them because every time they argued, in the back of my mind, I thought that this might be the time, the time when they finally broke up and I could have Jade for myself. Of course, that was in an ideal fantasy universe that I could never reach.
Tori eventually explained that she couldn't come because Trina was having her wisdom teeth removed and so someone had to look after her, since her parents were going to be away that had to be Tori.
Soon after was the end of class, it was the last period of the day so Jade and I headed to her car, I was going back to Jade's house to get ready for tonight, unfortunately, Andre and Beck were as well.
We stepped outside to be welcomed by blistering heat, since it was the middle of July, I was wearing super short shorts and a tank top as always.
How does Jade always manage to get by wearing her dark skinny jeans and combat boots when it's this hot outside? She definitely pulls of the look though, and she never even sweats either! At least that's what she tells me.
I was leading the group through the parking lot to Jade's car when I heard Beck yell 'shotgun' from behind me. Ugh. I want to sit next to Jade.
As if she could read minds I heard an angelic voice a moment later,
"Let Cat sit in the front, she likes it." Sometimes I enjoyed it when she treated me like a child, it was cute, I liked to be looked after. But not always, jade didn't understand that I didn't need to be looked after all the time, I could look after myself if I needed to, but I wasn't complaining.
Beck didn't seem to mind me taking shotgun, Beck and I got along really well actually, he was like a big brother to me. A second one, that is. But to say that I was madly in love with his girlfriend, we were really close, he looked after me just like Jade did, and he always made me laugh and made me happy, of course, I couldn't really hate anyone. I mildly disliked Sinjin for his unhealthy obsession with Jade, but I truly believe he can be a good guy if he wants to.
Jade put her sunglasses on to drive since she wouldn't be able to see in this sun without them, but it was a shame to cover up those beautiful blue eyes of hers. She had the windows of the car down and music on loudly. I liked the sense of freedom I got when I was out with my friends, and especially Jade, we could go anywhere and do anything we wanted to do.
"I feel sorry for Tori not being able to come tonight." I said without moving my eyes from the side of Jade's face, it wasn't so bad that I was staring at her since it could appear that I was simply turning to include the boys in the conversation properly.
"Why? I don't care." Jade quickly replied. I giggled at her harshness. She always had it out for Tori.
"It's just not fair that one member of the group doesn't get to come out with us." I tried to phrase as nicely as possible, I hated disagreeing with Jade. Luckily Andre was the one to reply this time.
"Don't worry Cat, she can come some other time, she has to look after Trina." Andre put my mind at ease.
"Yeah we're still gonna have a great time." Jade said, and reached out her right hand and rested it on my thigh in a reassuring way, keeping her other hand on the wheel. Jade's physical contact sent a perfect tingling sensation all the way up my spine to my scalp, and the area where her hand was became hot, as if she was burning me, in a good way. Just from this slight touch Jade made my stomach turn and my heart beat triple in pace, she didn't even realise the power she had over me. I could feel beads of sweat running down the back of my neck at Jade's touch, and when she retracted her hand aafter a few perfect seconds, it felt like I had lost a limb, despite my high temperature that Jades fingertips on the skin of my leg had caused, and the sweltering heat outside, the exact area Jade's hand had occupied a mere moment ago felt cold as ice. I sighed at the situation I had been in for the past few years. Frankie was right, I did have to find some way to tell her.
After a 15 minute drive we pulled up at Jade's empty house, tonight was the first night Jade's parents were going to be away again, so the four of us, and maybe Robbie too, were going to stay at Jade's house.
When we walked in, the guys immediately jumped on the sofa and turned on the tv. Jade headed upstairs to get ready, since she wanted to take a shower, and she hadn't even decided what we were going to wear yet. I went into the living room and sat on Jade's Dad's armchair, which was next to the sofa, the guys were watching a football game.
I quickly got bored of a bunch of guys throwing an egg shaped 'ball' up and down a field for seemingly no reason at all, and I failed to join in the simultaneous reactions Andre and Beck had to various points in the game, so since I had heard the shower turn off upstairs, I decided to head up and see how Jade is doing.
I opened the door to see Jade wearing nothing but a leopard print pair of underwear, a thong to be precise. I immediately blushed and tried to avoid looking, despite that, first of all, I had seen Jade semi naked a million times, and secondly, I really really really wanted to look. Jade's body was utterly perfect, and I wanted nothing more to just dive on her, but I quickly flushed those awful thoughts from my mind as I continued trying to act normal, my face turning bright red. Jade dropped to the floor to pick up her towel when she saw the door open, but after seeing it was me she dropped the towel again and breathed a sigh of relief.
"Oh it's only you, shut the door then." She commanded of me, not wanting anyone else to see her.
"Sorry, I – uh…" I wasn't able to talk, despite my best efforts I still felt incredibly awkward, and I was becoming more uncomfortable the more aware I was that there was a warm liquid spreading in my shorts.
"Cat, what's wrong? You're acting as though you've never seen me naked before." Jade said through a laugh, sitting down on the bed. I finally managed to gather the courage to look at her, which introduced another issue, how was I supposed to maintain eye contact with her when her naked perfect breasts were a mere distance below?
"Are you, uh, are you going to put some clothes on?" This brought a mischievous smile to Jade's face.
"Na, I want to let my hair dry a little first, I just washed it. Anyway why does it matter? It's so cute how innocent you are Cat." Jade said to me with a smile, putting on hand down on the bed to lean on it, and tilting her head at me subconsciously. I just let out a breathless giggle, every moment becoming more difficult to not look down. "So what's up?" Jade probed.
"I just came to check up on you, the guys are watching tv and I got bored, thought I could talk to you while you get ready." I finally managed to form an audible sentence, pulling my confidence together, but failing to maintain eye contact as my eyes focused on the wall behind the beautiful girl in front of me.
"Don't you think Tori is a bitch?" I smiled, typical. Jade's favourite conversation, talking trash about Tori behind her back. I didn't approve of it, and I often told Jade off, which would almost always make her stop, but sometimes it made Jade feel better to say mean things about Tori y'know? Jade could get away with more or less anything with me anyway.
"Not this again, Jade." I grinned at her. The conversation diverting what little attention span I had away from the fact that Jade's naked breasts were less than a meter away from me.
"No seriously, who does she think she is? She's always flirting around Beck, and she's somehow managed to work her way into the group, which I do not approve of." Jade's facial expression and vocal patterns were becoming more and more aggressive the more she thought about Tori, why was she so mean to Tori anyway? Tori seems cool, and I get along with her just fine. We have a lot of fun, not as much fun as I have with Jade though.
My thoughts resulted in a smile appearing on my face. Amazing, I imagine Jade in my mind even when she's sat semi naked right in front of me. I focused back on the issue at hand, which was unlike me.
"Maybe you're a little too hard on her." I said with a sympathetic facial expression.
"I'm not, Cat, I understand that you can never see the bad in anyone, but I do see the bad in her, one day it's gonna come back to bite us in the ass, but when I try to keep her in line, I'm always the bad guy for it." Jade still had anger running through her veins, but there was an element of truth to her words. I immediately regretted my next action, but it happened before I even realised;
"I never think you're the bad guy." I said to Jade with meaningful eyes as I reached a hand over and rested it on the cool skin at the top of her thigh. Despite me thinking it was a bad idea, it seemed to successfully defuse the situation.
"Uh tha – thanks Cat. You always know what to say." Jade seemed a little flustered, which was definitely not normal for her, the same can be said for the red colour that began to flush her cheeks. I didn't understand what was going on at first but I had a thought, is this a result of me touching her? My heart skipped a beat as I pondered the idea that I could have this effect on Jade just by touching her, but the moment was snatched away as quickly as it had come as Jade awkwardly got up and walked towards her dresser, apparently made uncomfortable by whatever feeling I had induced. Jade had just managed to put on a bra that matched the pattern of her thong when Beck walked in.
"Does no one ever knock anymore?" Jade said in her usual defensive tone.
"Sorry I didn't know you were still getting ready but uh…" Beck looked Jade up and down and then proceeded to say, "Cat could you give Jade and I a minute please?" I turned to Jade to see her smirk as though she understood. I did not understand.
"One minute?" Jade questioned Beck.
"Maybe twenty minutes." Beck said returning Jade's mischievous smile. I still had no idea what they were talking about.
"Why?" I said, a genuine look of confusion on my face, switching glance from Jade to Beck and back. Beck then replied without moving his eyes away from Jade, but while slowly approaching her.
"Jade and I need to have… A chat." He said as he embraced her. Oh. Now I get it. I silently arose and left the room.
"Close the door behind you." Jade said as I walked out. I turned around to close the door and as it was closing I caught a glimpse of Beck's tongue entering her mouth. I sighed as I leant on the door and slouched into a sitting position with my back against it.
My mood rapidly declined as I heard muffled giggling come from inside the room behind me, followed by the sound of the two of them falling on to the bed. I pulled my knees in tight to my body and buried my head in my hands. I had walked in on Jade and Beck before, and I had heard them doing it before, but it never made it less painful each time. I wanted to get up and walk downstairs, but I didn't want Andre to notice that I wasn't my usual bubbly self, and I hated leaving Jade, so I just sat there, completely silent save for my occasional sob as I tried to hold back tears. As I heard the springs of Jade's bed contract faster and her moans grow louder, more tears cascaded down my face.
What have I done to deserve this curse? Falling in love with your best friend is a disaster.
After more or less 20 minutes I heard Beck groan and movement slow down to a cease. As I assumed this meant they were coming out soon I wiped the salty tears from my face and practiced my best fake smile. I was never good at hiding my emotions from Jade considering that I was an actress, but I had to do my best.
I was just preparing myself to stand up when the door opened behind me, sooner than expected, since I was leaning against it I fell back with the door until I was laying half in Jade's room.
"Woah sorry Cat." Beck laughed, I hadn't exactly fell far since I was sat down anyway so it was safe for them to assume I was okay. Physically that is, emotionally I was a wreck.
"See you soon babe, Cat and I are going to get ready." Jade kissed Beck and he went downstairs, she then reached down and pulled me to my feet, our bodies came very close together for a swift moment which allowed me to detect the heat emanating from Jade's body, not to mention the scent of pheromones. "Your mascara has ran a little Cat, hang on." Jade reached over to her desk and retrieved a wipe, and proceeded to wipe away the mascara from my face, leaning down to me so our faces were mere inches away, her lips within reach if I were to just lean in. No Cat. Stop. "There you go." She smiled at me and walked over to her dresser. Jade looked after me so well.
It soon became apparent to me that I hadn't said a single word since I entered Jade's room again, and being quiet for any period of time was very out of character for me, but Jade didn't seem to notice as she lazily browsed her clothes for what she was going to wear tonight. Jade was now wearing more attire than before Beck had come in to her room, ironically. Now she had on a black pair of jogging bottoms and a black tank top, which I assumed she had just thrown on after she and Beck had done their business. "Well are you going to get ready or not? What are you gonna wear?" Jade said to me without looking away from the contents of her large wooden dresser. I moved to the bed and sat down near the pillow.
"I dunno, I'm sure I've got something in the drawer." My voice cracked slightly, but nothing worthy of taking note as I tried to respond to Jade. As I mentioned it, I motioned to the drawer of clothes I keep at Jade's house for various occasions.
"Well let's take a look, I can help you choose." Jade bent over and took out the drawer, and then placed it on the bed next to me, sitting on the other side of it. She was going to help me choose my outfit, how cute. A small, hopeful smile escaped my lips for a brief moment.
Jade then began to sift through the clothes in between us, laying possible options neatly out on the other side of the double bed. "Well what are you waiting for? Get undressed and try some of these outfits on." Jade said with a dopey grin. I blushed.
"Look away then." I whispered with a nervous giggle.
"Why? I've seen it before. Anyway, you got to see me naked earlier." She raised one eyebrow mischievously.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I exclaimed in response.
"Nothing Cat, just stop being cute and get out of those clothes." Jade said through a laugh.
I hesitantly took off my tank top from the bottom up and dropped it on the floor. Revealing a pink bra, the same colour as the tank top. I looked at Jade with flushed cheeks, and she motioned me to continue, she's paying a little too much attention to this, why does she always like to tease me? Jade said it was cute when I got uncomfortable, so sometimes she made me uncomfortable on purpose, it was a little mean, but I enjoyed any attention I could get from her.
Obeying Jade's wish I took off my shorts and put them on the floor also. This time revealing a pair of underwear that matched my bra. Jade observed the pale patch of my thigh where my tan ended, then looked over at the outfits she had laid out.
"Okay, so try these on, I picked a few out for you." Jade motioned to the clothes then looked back at me with a smile.
Feeling slightly self-conscious, I reluctantly stood up and grabbed one of the outfits. I tried them on one by one while Jade sat and watched, giving her opinion on each outfit. Jade always gave me the special treatment, so even though I know she hated many of my clothes, since they were way too girly for her, she bit her tongue and said I looked nice in each one. The final outfit was a sliver sequined tank top and a dark pair of denim short shorts. Jade always complimented me on the shorts.
"You look great! That outfit will definitely wow the crowd tonight Cat." Jade's words made me visibly excited as I hopped from one foot to the other. Jade then walked over to where the drawer of clothes, she picked out a pair of big black high heels. She handed them to me and I put them on. "There! Perfect. Go show the boys while I get ready." Her compliment caused butterflies in my stomach and I happily bounced off downstairs.
The four of us arrived at the venue to see that it was pretty full. The first thing I noticed was Robbie and Rex sat on a table in the middle of the room with two pretty girls. Jade immediately called them skanks, I didn't understand why.
We sat on the table nearest the door and watched as some people tried their best singing on the stage. Jade said that they were talentless nobodies, I didn't understand why.
Beck bought the four of us a round of drinks, but I wasn't sure what they were, I'm pretty sure he mentioned they were alcoholic but all I noticed was the pretty orange colour so I thanked Beck and drank it.
Notably, Jade was sat next to me on the same side of the table, and Beck and Andre were sat on the other, which was pretty unusual for Beck and Jade not to be sat together, but I definitely wasn't complaining.
After Robbie and Rex had their turn on the karaoke, Jade went to get herself another drink, and two intimidating girls came over and sat with us.
"First time here?" The brunette asked, taking Beck's drink from his hand and having a mouthful of it. Beck looked totally bewildered.
"Umm, yeah." He replied with a confused smile.
"If you get nervous I'll hold your hand." The girl reached out and began to stroke Beck's hand, Beck exchanged glances with Andre. Why would he get nervous? I guess she's just trying to be nice.
"I get nervous when my brother eats things without food." I interjected. Poor Frankie, "Seriously I think he ate my charm bracelet." I liked that bracelet too…
"You have insane hair!" The girl continued. She reached out her hand and began to stroke Beck's hair, he made some sort of sarcastic comment and moved her hand away, but she didn't give up so easily. I now realised what was actually going on, and as much as I disapproved of Beck and Jade's relationship, I had to intervene, no one did this to my best friend.
"Uhm… Hi… Miss." Okay, so she intimidated me a lot.
"What?" She barked.
"He has a girlfriend." I said with as much urgency as possible. I was getting pretty scared.
"I don't see her." She replied, her eyes not moving from Beck's direction. I then heard the lovely sound of Jade's voice, in her aggressive tone.
"Turn around." The girl slowly turned to see a very menacing but beautiful Jade glaring at her. "Now you see her." I could feel the poison in Jade's words.
"I don't see much." The girl bravely replied, not seeming fazed by Jade's presence. Jade looked as though she was about to tear the girl apart, but the girl still was not affected, she stood up and squared herself against Jade. Andre, Beck and I all jumped to the feet and Andre, the usual peace keeper, began to make very futile attempts to defuse the situation. The second, much quieter girl positioned herself beside Andre,
"Hey, check out dude's jacket." She motioned towards the 'HA' on Andre's jacket.
"Oh! Hollywood Arts! The school for wannabe's." The first girl responded.
"You might wanna be shutting your face there." Jade threatened. I felt completely helpless and worried in this situation, I hated conflict of any kind. After another attempt at cooling things down from Andre, I stopped paying attention to the conversation, my attention span had run it's course. I heard the girls mention something about singing, and buffalo nuggets.
"I like Japan!" I exclaimed, attracting everyone's attention. "Except my brother got stabbed there." Poor Frankie again. "It was an accident." I failed to mention that it was caused by him playing with knives in a sushi restaurant and the waiter trying to stop him. "He's better now." I breathed a sigh of relief as if I was living that moment all over again. My train of thought swiftly moved to the next topic. "Are buffalo Nuggets spicy?" My actions had seemed to inadvertently saved the day since the girls wandered off somewhere and the situation had defused. We sat back down and I began to play with Jade's purse, it was really neat, it was black and soft and it tickled my face. I noticed she was watching Robbie and Rex with the Northridge girls. I decided that jade wasn't paying me enough attention.
"I like your purse." I told her.
"Thanks." She looked at me for a split second. Not enough.
"What is this?"
"Monkey fur." And all of a sudden I was horrified.
"Oh." I placed the purse down on the table just as the DJ began to talk over the tannoy. Announcing that the two girls Jade almost pummelled into the ground were going to sing.
After what even I can only describe as a pitiful performance, our table clapped sarcastically.
"Yeah, we're clapping because it's over!" Jade shouted, this actually made me laugh a lot, but it was still mean, so I playfully pushed Jade's leg.
Then it was our turn to sing, I threw Jade a very flirtatious look, (I think it was the drink) and then got up to go and sing. Jade and I sung our very best, her voice was pretty amazing. And we danced in an extremely sexy way, which was the theme of the song, which meant we often found ourselves rubbing up against each other, we always did this anyway while dancing, but it never failed to make my body throb and heat up in excitement to feel Jade so close.
After our extremely thought provoking performance, the crowd went insane. Not to be arrogant, but there was no doubt that Jade and I had won this 'competition'. To my disappointment, when we'd finished Jade ran straight over to Beck and kissed him, which immediately washed away any sexual charge that experience had put in me. After we got off the stage the DJ immediately ran on to the middle of the stage to introduce the owner of the venue, and the judge of the competition.
"…I think two girls really stood out in particular tonight." Jade and I exchanged excited glances. "Hayley and Terra!" The looks immediately changed to that of rage when we heard the names, the crowd jeered at the girls as they hopped on the stage to get their trophy. From across the room Rex began to shout out what everyone was thinking.
"Are you wazzing me? Those scrunges can't sing!" Rex said it in his own weird language, but he still got the point across. Even I was pretty angry in this situation. Beck and Andre got involved too, which included a very out of character threat from Andre, surprising everyone, Beck put a hand on his shoulder as an indication to calm down.
"Hey I own the club, so I decide who wins." The owner followed up.
"Thank you Dad." The brunette said to the owner, everyone then seemed to realise something that I didn't which threw me into another world of confusion. I voiced my thoughts.
"Wait why would she call him Dad unless.." Then my thoughts clicked into place, and I was mortified. "I bet he's her Father!" I slapped a hand on Jade's wrist in anger, she wasn't fazed by my pathetic strength and she placed a gentle hand on my shoulder, which calmed me down considerably. Once again Rex began to shout everyone's thoughts.
"Fix! Fix!" Rex's outburst created even more aggressive jeering from the crowd, which was interrupted by the brunette on stage.
"Hey! We won, because we rock." I couldn't hold back an outburst at this point.
"Don't believe everything your Daddy says!" That seemed to sting them a little, even more so when Jade followed it up.
"Like when he tells you you're pretty." The crowd enjoyed this very much, it was rare that I enjoyed people being ridiculed, but in this case, they deserved it, besides, Jade was having the time of her life, and anytime Jade was happy, I was happy. Well, for the most part, it was a little hard to be happy when the thing making her happy was the love of someone else. The fun ended with them banning us from singing there ever again.
- Present day -
Jade's POV: It felt like years since. I could feel the enormous weight in my stomach, it was there for two reasons; the emotional distress, and the fact that I hadn't eaten since.
I'd just moved from one place to another. Not acknowledging anything or anyone, just drifting to the next location, and sitting there for hours until something meant that I had to go somewhere else.
I was far, far from my usual self.
I had about 300 missed calls and texts from people trying to see if I was okay. I didn't answer to any of them. Tori had apologised a million times, she clearly was taking full responsibility for her actions, and I respected that. Despite everything, I didn't have it in me to hate her. I'd forgiven her and left it at that. It wasn't worth it anymore.
Nothing was.
I had returned to exactly what I was before I fell in love with her. An empty shell of a human. Only now I didn't even have my passion to keep me going.
Before, I always had hatred, anger and passion for things I truly believed in, but now I had nothing, I had lost everything that was important to me, and so my emotions drained and so did everything about me.
I wanted to die, nothing was worth it anymore.
This is why I never let people get to me before. It never ends well. Fuck optimism. This is how it always ends up, no matter what.
I had been sat in that sickly pink room for every hour they would allow me to. School hadn't even crossed my mind, they could all go fuck themselves. I'm pretty sure they wouldn't mind me skipping school though to be honest, all things considered.
On the other side of the window to my right I could see a tall, dark haired man in his thirties talking to a short, plump woman. They both had grim looks on their faces as the man turned to look at me, attempting to feign a smile, while I sat there staring, no emotion in my face, no colour in my face.
I hadn't slept, bathed or ate in days, what was the point without her? In actual fact, despite how I felt, it had only been about 4 days since it happened. Maybe 5, I can't even keep track of time anymore.
I attempted to clear my mind as the dark haired man who was stood outside came into the room.
"Good afternoon Miss West." He tried to cut through the obvious tension in the room. I just grunted. I wasn't trying to make things harder for him, but I really couldn't have done much more. "How are you doing?" He pressed on.
"About as well as I look." I croaked, not a hint of humor in my tone.
"Well I'm afraid that no matter what the current situation, we're going to have to talk about it." I looked up into the man's eyes with an empty look, and silently nodded. It was only then the both of us looked over to the one thing in the room I had been trying to ignore completely – the red headed angel lying in a bed to my left. Looking more peaceful then she ever could, completely silent, unable to make a sound or movement. "You can't keep coming here like this every day. It's going to kill you. You need some sleep, and something to eat." He said, looking back in my direction.
"I don't care." I grumbled, my eyes examining every inch of red coming from her scalp.
"Well you being here isn't doing anyone any good. Threatening the staff is inconveniencing us, and clearly you're not doing so well." I shot him a menacing glare. "Look, I understand what you're going through, but driving yourself into the ground isn't going to help, you have to attempt to return to normal."
"Normal? How the fuck am I supposed to return to normal without her? She is my normal." I felt like I was going to cry, which I didn't even care about at this point, but I had nothing left in me. I was completely dehydrated. "Well you wanted to talk about it, so go ahead, tell me what you need to tell me." My voice cracked considerably.
"Well…" He sighed. "She seems stable. Her vital signs are normal, as is her heart rate, blood pressure, breathing rate, more or less everything."
"Then what's the problem?" I responded, urgency and desperation in my voice.
"Well, she took severe trauma to the head, her skull is fractured and well…"
"What? What is it?" I almost screamed at him.
"We don't know if she will ever wake up." There were no sounds for quite a few seconds after hearing this, other than the gradual sound of the heart rate monitor over in the corner of the room. The doctor decided it was time to continue. "There is another thing."
"What?" I attempted to say, but no real sound came out. He understood.
"Well, in the event she does wake up, there is a very good chance that the damage her brain took could leave her with some degree of amnesia."
"What term?" I looked up at him once more.
"Well it's hard to say at this point, it could range anywhere from a couple of days to years of her life that she will lose."
"Is there any chance she will be able to get those memories back?" I said, with a distant glimmer of hope in my words.
"Don't hold your breath."
A/N: Finally! I can't describe how sorry I am, also, sorry if this chapter is a little slow, might explain why it was so hard to write but, whatever. Please review, and I swear this won't happen again (Y).