Chapter 10:

Risks

Soda

I was never much of a partier – never really drank, never really got into any drugs besides cigarettes, and definitely never got a girl knocked up. I was always the one to drive others, like Two-Bit and Dallas, around after they could no longer stand because they were so drunk; I was always the one to shelter them at the house against Darry's word because I didn't want anything to happen to them; I was there for Dallas when he got a broad knocked up and nearly went insane.

That's my problem, I guess. I'm always there for people; always there to pick up their pieces; always there to fix and mold them back into some shadow of their original self.

But no one is ever there for me.

There's one night I remember vividly; it's one I'll probably never forget.

"Come on, Soda," Steve hollered around my bedroom door. "It'll be fun!"

"I told you, Steve: I ain't going." I shouted back as I shoved my legs through a pair of sweatpants.

"Why the hell not?" Two-Bit's voice joined Steve's now, and I sensed that Dallas wasn't far behind them. With a sigh, I hastily opened the door and whisked past them into the living room.

"Because," I said as I sat down on the couch and narrowed my eyes to face the three of them, "I'm not up for it."

"You're never up for anything, Curtis." Dallas' face came into my vision from where he stood out on the porch, smoking a cigarette casually.

"That's because whenever I do participate in something that involves the three of you, something bad happens."

"Not always!" Steve and Two-Bit scowled in unison, rolling their eyes.

Dally sighed loudly, clearly aggravated. "Come on, you two," he said, pointing a finger at Two-Bit and Steve. "Just because Soda ain't going doesn't mean we gotta miss the fun of –"

"Shut up, Dallas!" Steve shouted hurriedly, making it impossible to figure out how Dally had finished his sentence.

"You've gotta branch out more, Soda," Two-Bit muttered to me as he sat on the couch next to me. Steve nodded in agreement as he took up the other side, sprawling his arms across the back and the arm of the couch.

I heard Dallas bark out a laugh and watched him throw his cigarette, not even half finished, onto the ground and put it out with his heel before he stepped inside. He seemed pleased to have us sitting down, to which I knew we were going to get some sort of dipshit speech from him in about thirty seconds.

"I'll give this to you straight," Dallas drawled, the smell of smoke wafting all through the house as he paced back and forth. "because you know I'm not one to sugarcoat shit." He jabbed a finger at me and threw a wicked, sadistic smile my way as he continued. "You, my dear friend, have got to grow some balls and take a risk. Risks are everywhere and in everything, Sodapop, and you are the one dumbfuck who completely avoids them at all costs. Ever since your parents died, you've done nothing but be safe; you've done nothing but sit here in this goddamn house. You've done nothing but sit here and watch over your brothers; one of which can take care of the other just fine by himself. You're like a ghost of your former self, man. What happened to the Soda we knew – the fun one? The one who was always ready to crack a joke or get drunk or even pick up our sorry asses when we needed it? You were a risk-taker, Curtis; you know you were. Take this one risk tonight; go out with us – take this one risk and don't even think about looking back."

So that's what I did. I snuck out of the house against Darry's will when he was asleep and went out to a party. I left my blood brothers to go and take a risk with my brothers who weren't mine by blood, but by heart.

I could barely see anything – much less anyone – through all the flashing lights and the booze that was in my system. I was on top of the world; that was somewhere I hadn't been in a long, long time.

And it felt good to be on top.

I knew Darry was going to kill me tomorrow; I knew that like the back of my hand. I knew that both him and Ponyboy would be shocked to out that I'd gone to a party, yet not surprised at who convinced me to go.

I knew a lot of things that night, but I didn't care; all I cared about was finally living.

I could see Steve and Two-Bit at the back of the bar, making out with one girl each. I could hear Dallas shouting and hollering at girls from across the bar, trying to get their attention. My mind was fuzzy, but I vaguely registered people pushing past me and shoving me every which way – left, right, back and forth – until I could no longer process where I was going.

Cool night air suddenly brushed against my body, leading me to believe that I was outside. I spun on my heel and crashed into a body, getting a rough shove into someone else, who cursed at me as her drink spilled. Finally, I decided to walk off on my own, and after tripping on my own feet a few times and falling on my ass in the wake of those, I got myself to a bench and settled down on it, sighing and laughing at the same time.

"I am so drunk right now!" I shouted to the dull night sky, immediately bursting into hysterics. I could feel everyone's – drunk and sober – eyes on me, giving me weird looks, but I didn't care. The booze in my system – a mixture of whiskey, tequila, and good old beer – made me completely unaware of the person sitting next to me until she blew a puff of cigarette smoke in my face. I hissed and batted it away frantically, to which she laughed heartily and continued to do it just to piss me off.

"Fucking stop!" I cried at her, sounding like a little kid who just got his toy taken away and wanted it back.

That damn laugh again came from her lips. "Someone's feisty when they're drunk, hm?"

"I'm not drunk!" I protested, rising from my seat and staring her down defiantly. "I'm just tipsy."

"Sure you are..." the girl mused, rising from her seat as well and coming really fucking close to me. I could smell the smoke off her clothes and her breath as she whispered, "What's your name, boy?"

A purr-like noise came from my throat, earning me a chuckle from her. "Soda."

"Claudia," the girl introduced quickly before tipping her head back and downing the last of her beer. "So, Soda..." Claudia purred, taking my hand in hers and beginning to lead me back into the bar, "Want to get me another drink?"

I did just that. I got her another drink; I got her three, to be exact. I gave myself one more shot; the shot that would, hopefully, not let me down.

In my drunken state, I felt fine; I felt like nothing could go wrong. I thought I would – could – make all the right decisions.

So as Claudia led me into the darkest part of the bar and shut the door behind us, I had no clue what would come next. She turned the lights on suddenly, making me recoil and groan at the blast of light my eyes now had to adjust to.

In the center of the room, a grand piano – now dusted with age – rested clear as day. I watched as Claudia maneuvered her way around it, dragging her fingers in the dust that collected on the black surface. She crooked one finger at me and murmured, "Come here, Soda. I want to show you something."

I felt my feet move before my body, and I was suddenly before her, her breath fanning over my face and her words slurring together in her own drunken way. "I used to play this old thing before they made the space into more seating room..." She smiled in the smallest way, a twitch of her mouth before it disappeared. "Would you like to hear me play?"

I nodded, to which she hummed in pleasure and took my hand again. She led me to the seat before the piano and settled herself on it, pulling me down with her. I set my hands under my thighs when she let go of my hand, wary of what drunken-Soda might do to her while she played and not wanting to find out what that would be.

When she played, I forgot about everything else in the world. I forgot about Steve, Two-Bit and Dallas just outside the door in the bar; I forgot about how much trouble I was going to be in tomorrow; I forgot about everything and focused on her – on this moment and how wonderful it was to be existing. She played that goddamn piano so beautifully; so tragically that it was almost painfully mesmerizing.

When she finished, she looked to me. Her dark eyes – a dark, cerulean blue, I realized – scanned my dark brown. Her lips parted slightly, like she had words to say yet didn't know how to say them. There was a tense silence between us, one that I knew would break no matter who spoke first.

Finally, her silky voice, so drunk yet so beautiful, came to me. "Do you take risks, Soda?"

I smirked, my heart bursting; cupping her face in my hand, I stared hard into her eyes. "I do now."

Maybe it was stupid now – the fact that I really thought I loved Claudia – but back then it was so right.

And as I look back on it now, I realize that out of the sins and virtues of the world, loving her was a risk worth taking.

Well, hey! XD

I really have no clue where this chapter came from. I literally just sat down at my computer and started to write this, and here it is. I know this has nothing to do with Insanity, but it's something different than our usual distraught-Pony. :)

I hope you enjoyed this chapter! It was certainly a joy to write, and I'll most likely write more like this from time to time from Soda's point of view if you like it that much.

See you next update!