Save State

By: Aviantei

File Nine: Response Prompt

The smell of spiced beef and pasta drifted through the air as I drifted back to consciousness. Underneath it were a number of scents Errat's culinary experience could surely identify in moments, but all I could say was that they smelled good. And that my head was pounding, a throb at the back of my skull just forceful enough to keep me awake. I tried to keep my eyes shut as long as possible, but they cracked open all the same, coaxed by the blend of moonlight through the window and lightbulbs from another room. Sitting up and adjusting to vision, I recognized the dim outline of the Noda family's living room.

Unlike my own house, which had hardly changed its layout since I was a brat, the Nodas' home was constantly shuffling in new souvenirs from their culinary research trips, as it were. In the dark, that didn't matter much. Pulling myself to a sit, I slowly moved my hand to find the coffee table's edge. From there, it only took moments to find the glass left for me, cool to the touch as I raised it up for a drink, ice clinking in water all the way.

How did I even get here, though?

I had been talking with Nochi when that weird guy showed up. He was bad news. Definitely bad news. Even being away from him couldn't erase the feeling in my gut. The only thing worse than that primal caution was the memory of my dream, terror blurring together with my migraine.

[Are you sure you want to reset this data?]

I shuddered. A reset. I didn't like the implication of those words. To go back to a previous point, to restart from there. Anything after that point, gone. I didn't know where that point was, but I didn't want to lose anything. I would even take my failure at the Shrine Ceremony over everything I had done since I had started my journey disappearing.

I don't want to forget myself.

I groped blindly for the table again, catching sight of the provided coaster and setting my glass down on it. I didn't want to invoke the wrath of the Noda patriarch should I stain his imported table—I couldn't even remember which region it had come from, but it cost a pretty Poké. Trying to ignore the slick of condensation on my hands, I hugged myself, blanket and all.

It had been so easy. Just a question, just a careless click. All of it, gone. The same steadfast instinct that had lead me to the Championship and beyond had erased everything without a second thought.

I tried to convince myself it was just a dream by focusing on my surroundings, but it didn't do much. Sure, my blanket cocoon was cozy, but it couldn't keep away the problems that were inside me. The best I could do was focus on the slight clatter coming from the kitchen, which gave way to footsteps.

"Dude, you're up," Errat stage whispered from the entrance to the kitchen. His long legs quickly closed the distance between us, stopping by the end table to click on the lamp. Soft light filled the room and Errat sat down on the far end of the couch from me, cradling a mug. "How are you feeling? Sick? Nauseous? I know things are stressful, but you need to take care of yourself."

Still hugging my knees, I tucked my chin over their caps. "I feel like crap."

"You don't look much better," Errat joked, stuck in the awkward silence of the aftermath. His eyes darted around the room before falling back on me. "Sorry." I shrugged. "Seriously, what happened? Passing out is bad news, Jijri. I'm worried about you."

"I'm just more impressed that I woke up in silence," I said. I associated the Noda family with bustling energy and chatter about cooking. Seeing any part of their home empty just felt wrong. "Shouldn't your mom be fussing by now?"

Errat sent a wayward glance to the ceiling. "It's kinda late, you know." Considering the darkness inside and out, I guessed that was right. How long had I been unconscious for? "Everyone's getting their rest. Tomorrow's the last day of the festival; we can't start slacking now." Even if the day itself wasn't as busy in terms of crowds, there was still a number to be done in Festival cleanup. Fri probably had contributed to that particular battle plan as well.

I grimaced, blocking my expression with a mouthful of blanket. "So why are you up?"

"I'm taking care of your ass," Errat griped, offering me his mug. Knowing that denying a Noda's food (in their own household nonetheless) was tantamount to standing unmoving from the line of fire of a Hyper Beam, I accepted the offering. "Soup," he elaborated. Warmth pooled at my fingers and garlic pricked at my nose, sending my stomach to attention.

Silencing my mouth and my appetite, I raised the mug to my lips, cheese and potato meeting my tongue. Errat watched me eat before heaving out a sigh.

"Well," he said, "if you're not gonna tell me why this total stranger found me at my booth freaking out that you were unconscious and asked me for help…" Errat let the guilt trip hang for a moment. While I felt bad for Nochi having to deal with such BS on my behalf, I only furthered the intake of my soup. Errat huffed, but concluded, "Then talk to me about Fri."

I nearly choked mid-swallow. I had been expecting a lecture about the Shrine Ceremony, not the aftermath. Thumping my chest in hopes of clearing my airway, I croaked, "That's unfair."

"What's unfair is how you two treated each other," Errat accused, pointing a finger in my direction. I sunk farther into the cushions. "One of the maidens dropped by the stand afterwards and told me what happened. I expect better of you two, as Champion and Shrine Ceremony Coordinator. But, frankly, I expect better of you two as my friends." Mortification joined the pit of tumbling emotions in my chest. Errat dropped his hand, not once breaking his gaze with me. "You know she didn't mean it," he said.

"It doesn't matter."

"You didn't mean it, either."

"Doesn't matter," I growled out. Regardless of our intentions, Fri and I had said some awful shit. Becoming close to another person made you pretty prone to attacks by them. I'd betrayed her trust when I started insulting her dreams, just the same way she did to me. I sipped at my soup before I could ruin my remaining childhood friendship.

Errat propped his hand up on his fist with an unimpressed stare. The real question as which one of us was more fed up with my attitude. "It does matter," he pressed. He knew how to be stubborn, but sometimes he took it the whole nine meters. "Listen, we've all been friends since we were brats. I know just as well as you do that this will pass."

Strange to think it had been over a decade since we had met. In our region, kids weren't allowed to handle Pokémon until they were way older for safety. Instead, we had attended the small school tucked alongside the east end of town. Being in the same age group, we ended up in the same class rotations a lot. Errat and I met through a scuffle on the playground, and Fri had come to break it up.

Watching their roles reversed was frankly disorienting.

"I mean, we're adults now," Errat continued, tugging off his bandana and running a hand through his hair. "You two are capable of talking things out and understanding each other." What, understanding that I had fucked everything up? Nochi had implied otherwise about the Ceremony, but she wasn't from here. What could she possibly know? "I mean, if you need time, just take time. But don't give up on each other, okay?"

Pleading concern flickered over Errat's expression, even through the dim shadows. I didn't know what to say in response. What I should say was at total odds with what I was feeling. Talk it through? It would be easier to pretend that it hadn't happened, but I wouldn't be able to forget. Despite the happiness I had felt on my and Fri's date, there wasn't an easy fix to this.

"Jijri, come on, this isn't—"

"Enough."

I stood, blanket tumbling to the floor. I thudded the empty soup mug to the table. Consideration for the resting had been then only thing stopping me from slamming it down, from raising my voice. Errat stared in open-mouthed confusion. I stopped watching his expression as I headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" Errat fumbled for words, hissing as a crack of impact with the table echoed throughout the living room. I stumbled about in the dark, finding my pack and shoes by the front door as expected. "You just passed out, you shouldn't—"

"I'm going out," I answered, pausing at the harsh tone left in my voice. Heaving a sigh as I forced my foot into its respective sneaker, I swapped to the best semblance of polite I could muster. "Errat just…let me be for a while. I really can't do this right now."

Errat's footsteps stopped. "If you need someone to talk to, I'm here for you."

"Yeah."

I undid the lock and stepped outside. Crisp air breezed across my bare arms, and I wished for my blanket cocoon back. Errat would even let me in if I knocked, but I couldn't bring together the words to properly talk to him. Or have the right state of mind to have him lecture me. My journeys had lead me through the night plenty of times, so I was used to the travel. Rubbing my arms for a bit of heat, I wandered into the surrounding trees.

Plenty of wild Pokémon scurried about in the woods, but I didn't focus on them. They were low level anyways, plus were used to people. Calling out Wicker would have given me some extra security, but she didn't deserve to deal with my fowl mood.

Simmering, I went through the tress with no real warning and ended up on Festival territory, back in the entertainment sector. With the sheer amount of space the thing took up, it wasn't too surprising. The entire thing was empty, save for fragments of trash scattered out and about. The early morning Festival Committee folks would tidy it up before things picked up. Not even stall owners were running maintenance. It was seriously too late to be wandering around like this.

It didn't stop me from wandering around anyway. Even though I wanted to rely on my best friend, talking to Errat wouldn't solve the real problem. If I wanted to push aside my self-doubt and start to search for another reason the Shrine Guardian hadn't arrived, I needed more clues. Nochi thought the secret rested in my dreams.

Thinking them back over, there wasn't much to work with. Nochi hadn't seemed to think so, either. Not until I had brought up the first dream, the one with Wicker. How had that dream been different?

A lot of ways. For one, it wasn't an endless loop. I had existed in that dream, traveled. I had existed in my most recent dream, too, but that one wasn't different, too. I had traveled around town, as mixed up as it had been. In the first one, I hadn't recognized where I was. It hadn't been somewhere in the region I had explored before, and I had seen every last corner chasing after Wicker.

No, in my previous dream, I had been somewhere different. That completely black place with the text in the air. I had passed it off as nonsense from my subconscious, but that wasn't it. Despite everything, I felt like I belonged there, as if that void was somewhere I had to be.

"'Return to the title screen and…' And what?" I mumbled. Trying to think didn't give me any results. It was like I had never heard the end of that sentence. Stopping my pacing, I kicked a nearby stand. "And what?!" I shouted, balling my hands into fists. "What is that even supposed to mean?!"

"Well, if you'd mentioned that to Nochi, she could have given you a hint." I whirled around, finding the glowing guy from before standing in the alley of stalls. My stomach twisted on sight. The lack of tree cover let more moonlight shine over us, making his…skin condition a bit less obvious. The guy brushed some checkered hair out of his face, adding, "Poor move on your part, kid."

I scowled at his choice of words. Professor Spruce calling me bozu on and off somehow felt less humiliating. "Who's the kid here?" I retorted, crossing my arms across my chest. Whatever this guy had done before had made me pass out, but showing fear didn't seem like a good idea at all. "With a baby face like that, you probably should still be in daycare."

He pouted for a moment, puffing out the already round edges of his face, before trying to cover the expression up with a chuckle. He may have been taller than Nochi (which didn't seem that difficult of a feat), but he was easily several centimeters shorter than me. "Well," he said, recovering, "I may be a lot younger than I look, but I still know a lot more than you do."

My further attempt at a burn died at his words. I had to concede that point. I didn't know anything. And while Nochi seemed like she had clues, this guy clearly knew something, too. I couldn't wait until morning to find the girl for answers. If something like my dream came true just because I had dawdled…

"Well if Nochi could give me a hint, can you give me something more?" The guy placed a palm across his lapels and dipped his head in a short bow. At your service, my ass, I griped. "Actually, who are you anyway?"

The guy stood up straight, a superior glint flashing through his eyes—or maybe it was just their shining state. He tucked both hands into his pockets. "All the Champions," he said, an almost wistful tone to his voice, "they're always kids just like you. The newest generation of Champions, that is." I frowned. The past half a decade had seen a number of new Champion inductees taking their places. I was just one of many. "Though you've all been getting friendlier over the years. I think you're the chattiest. Oh, and the oldest, with your rules and all."

Other regions hadn't been as meticulous about their age restrictions on being a traveling Pokémon trainer, some even allowing kids to start their journey as early as ten. Here, you had to be at least sixteen, though I had delayed my own journey due to the loss of my mother. It was weird to think that once I started attending League conferences, I'd be surrounded mostly by Champions not much older than Fuji.

Not that the guy seemed to be getting anywhere with his rambling.

"To put it simply," he continued, looking like he was enjoying himself, "at this point I'm only an observer."

"I honestly was asking for your name."

"Ah." He giggled, looking way too much like a kid for his earlier intense expression. If it weren't for the uproar in my gut, I wouldn't get why Nochi was so ambivalent towards him. "Pixel No. Just Pixel is fine."

"Jijri. Though, considering your reactions, you already know that."

"See? I know lots of things." Pixel smiled as he stepped towards me, freeing a hand from his pocket to offer a shake. "I can definitely help you out of this mess. What do you say?"

I watched his unwavering, glowing hand. My headache returned in full force, pounding like Errat hammering the Noda family stall together. Trusting this guy was a bad idea. I didn't trust him. I just didn't have a choice. Between the unknown entity before me and the fate of deletion looming, going with Pixel was the lesser of two evils.

I went to shake his hand, only to have a Chandelure knock me flat on my ass, almost cracking my head against the stall behind me. Pixel jumped back, orange eyes forming luminous slits in the dark. The Chandelure hovered in front of me, smelling of oil and heat, its purple flames casting a new glow over the alley.

"That's enough out of you," Nochi's voice barked, stepping out of the shadows between two stands. Her earlier dress had been replaced with pure black form fitting fabric, hair pushed out of her eyes by a white headband. Judging by the Pokéball hooked to her waist, the Chandelure was yours. "I warned you before, Pixel. Flicker."

Nochi held up a single finger. The Chandelure in front of me summoned small flames around it, which remained in an orbit. It recognized its moves by hand signals. I had only seen that a handful of times in my journey, and nothing good ever followed.

"Rude," Pixel huffed, a couple meters separating him from both Nochi and her Pokémon. I stood up, using the stall behind me for support, my head swimming through muddy water. "I helped you find Errat, you know. Jijri could have just been left on the forest floor otherwise."

"I didn't need your help," Nochi retorted, her finger remaining steady as she took metered steps towards Pixel. Chandelure floated forward in unison, the heat shifting away with it. "I don't need your 'help' now. I can see the data just fine, just like I can see the hack in your palm."

"What? This palm?" Pixel held up the same hand he had offered me, wiggling his fingers. Something across his skin rippled, though it was hard to tell with Chandelure in the way. "I'm only sending Jijri where he needs to go." Pixel dropped his cheery tone, his pitch dropping as he said, "Last I checked, you can't do that."

Nochi's finger pointed downward. Before I could even register it as a signal, Chandelure had already launched the collection of flames around it at Pixel in a swirl of Will-O-Wisp. I didn't blink, but Pixel vanished, the fire attack colliding harmlessly with the dirt path.

"That's adorable," Pixel chirped from beside me. I jumped at his presence and scurried back a few steps, keeping my eyes on his hands. One hovered in the space where my shoulder had been moments before. Pixel kept his eyes on Nochi. "Are you sure you really want to send your precious Flicker after me? You know what I could do to him."

Flicker rushed past me—I hadn't even seen Nochi's signal. Darkness swirled near the Pokémon's mouth, the Shadow Ball aimed straight for Pixel. The boy sighed, shrugged, and raised his hand, setting off a tsunami in my stomach.

Stepping into the battlefield like a complete and utter moron, I stood between Flicker and Pixel. The Chandelure hesitated, holding its attack in place. Pixel raised an eyebrow before doubling over with a cackle.

"Gonna attack the one you're trying to save there, girlie?" he snickered.

Nochi stood upright, her eyes on me. The combination of Pixel's white and Flicker's purple glows bled into the moonlight, leaving Nochi's expression partially covered by shadow. "You can't trust him, Jijri," she said. "I did once, and it didn't lead to anything good. You don't have to make the same mistake."

"But I'm just supposed to trust you?" I asked, tone harsher than what I intended. "I know you're a friend of the Professors' and all, but you haven't explained anything to me at all." Pixel snickered again, and I jabbed a thumb in his direction. "He's been more talkative than you have."

"He's got a point," Pixel sang. "You look just as suspicious as I do at this point, Nochi."

Flicker growled, the Shadow Ball contrasting against its purple body even in the darkness. Pixel held up his hands in mock surrender.

"I didn't knock him out in the middle of the forest," Nochi retaliated. "I think that counts for something."

"I think," I interjected, "you should let me decide that for myself." Pixel nodded, but Nochi's frown didn't shift. I gestured to Flicker's ready-to-fire form. "Now if we could stop this little warzone before we break something important, that would be great." The last thing I needed was to get in trouble for any damages to the Festival. Fri hated my guts enough as it was.

Pixel only maintained his pose of surrender. Nochi sighed, "Flicker," and the Chandelure floated back to her side, dispersing the Shadow Ball. Instead of reaching for the Pokéball at her waist, she crossed her arms. "What do you want to know?"

Pixel let out an exaggerated gasp. "You're actually gonna tell someone?" he teased. "Man, I bet that Black would have appreciated that. I guess that the lucky color is—"

"Don't talk about Touya that way." Flicker flared up at his trainer's words, each flame easily doubling in height. Nochi patted her Pokémon's arm, his fire returning to its regular size. He glared at Pixel, though. Nochi returned her focus to me. "Sorry. Where would you like me to start?"

"What's going on here would be nice." I lifted my hat, pushing stray fragments of hair back underneath it. "You all seem to know why the Shrine Guardian didn't show up. Let's start there."

Nochi paused, looking to Pixel for a moment. He waved his hand in a "get on with it" motion. Nochi inhaled and said, "The Shrine Guardian was supposed to show up for your challenge. You, as the hero, were supposed to fight and possibly capture it. That would be up to your merit, or rather, your player's merit.

"However, the event is proceeding without the proper input from the player—you, Jijri, are following a story path independently. For you, this is a problem because you've busted the order. That's why the ceremony failed. Something is allowing you to act on your own without any guidance." She paused, Flicker's flame wavering the grimace on her face. "At least, that's what I can tell. I'm not the best at reading data."

"Okay, hold on a second," I said, failing to keep my headache from intensifying. Professor Maple's suggestion to go home and sleep was sounding like a pretty good idea right now. "When you say 'player,' you don't mean like…"

I trailed off, but Nochi didn't answer. She looked like she'd come out on the wrong side of a sour Poképuff.

Pixel stepped closer, though I made sure to keep out of arm's reach. "Let me try," he offered, and Nochi didn't try to stop him. "Think about what you said before. Title screen, data, player—what does that make you think of?"

The answer was so obvious I didn't even want to say it out loud.

Luckily, Pixel grinned and carried on, saving me the trouble. "I'm sure you can put the rest together," he said, and I nodded. They were implying my life was a goddamn video game. Given my dreams lately, I was inclined to believe them. "You mentioned the title screen—and that's where your error has relocated that mythical Pokémon for you." He waved his hand through the air, and this time I could catch the blur of pixels surrounding it. "I could relocate you there, too, if you like."

"It would be dangerous," Nochi said. Pixel rolled his eyes, dragging trails of vibrant pixels in the wake of his fingers. "Jijri, you've only gained enough self-awareness to operate without a player. This can happen when a game has been abandoned for a time. But if you don't do anything, though, they may come back and restore you to the previous save state, and you'll be fine. If you go through with it, though, you could corrupt the data beyond repair. What could happen to your game then is out of even Pixel's influence."

Whatever weight her statement carried was brushed off by Pixel's snort. "Oh, and deletion's better?" he prompted, hands resting on his hips. "You and I have more than one outlet point to return to. This guy doesn't." Pixel pointed right at me, mirroring my previous gesture. "You'll forget you ever existed—go back to being a happy vessel. Is that okay with you?"

Everyone's eyes turned on me. Even Flicker stared, two yellow discs in the dark. I rested my hand on my pack where Wicker's ball rested. Just how far back was the previous save state? How much would I be losing if I just sat around and let my player handle things? Would that be better than possibly corrupting everything, losing everything? And for what? My dream?

Yes, for my dream.

"I've waited long enough," I said.

Pixel whistled over Nochi's flabbergasted "Huh?"

"I have to accomplish this," I continued, though I felt more like I was talking to myself. "This is something I've always wanted to do, and I finally have the chance. Fri worked hard for my sake, so I gotta work hard for hers, too." If I managed an encounter with the Shrine Guardian and brought it back, we could still receive its blessing. We could still be safe. "I'm not giving up on my dream just because some player doesn't want to deal with me anymore."

Nochi had said self-awareness like it was a bad thing.

I didn't believe that.

Flicker nudged at Nochi's side with one of his arms, and she raised a hand to meet it. Flicker crooned at the touch. "I won't stop you," Nochi whispered, her hard expression melting. With all that concern, she almost looked the same as the girl that stood by N's side. Her true identity wasn't something I could judge. "But please…be careful. You don't want to be in the hero's position and something goes wrong. It just…" She looked down, pain flashing across her expression. I didn't have the right to press her, and so I stayed silent.

"Well," Pixel drawled, flicking his wrist out in front of him. The distortion surrounding his hand had grown, causing his fingers to spark, but it didn't seem to affect him much. "My turn then." A thoughtful expression caught on his face. "Oh, did you want to prep anymore? You have a bunch of items, but only one Pokémon?"

"Wicker will be enough," I answered. I had planned on challenging the Shrine Guardian with her alone at the Ceremony. Just because the venue had changed didn't mean that my strategy needed to. "She and I can handle this. Don't you sweat it." Funnily enough, I felt as confident as I sounded.

"Heh." Pixel offered out his hand, glitches and all, with a grin. "I hope you make it, Jijri. I could use a Champion like you around."

I tried to think of something clever to say as I took his hand, but my voice vanished along with the rest of the Festival alley, and then I was gone.

[Avi's Beginning of a Hectic Month Notes]

Well, a lot is happening in April. Including the last two chapters of this story. About time.

Thanks again to those that have read this story. Even if it's my weird self-indulgence.

This chapter was tricky. Because Pixel. Man, what am I even doing with this guy?

This month is also gonna be tricky. Several things are happening all at once. But I guess that's life, right? Just gonna have to try to keep up the best I can.

The final chapter of this posts next week. Please look forward to it!

[NOTES] 04.01.2017