A/N: Thank you Tishbing, bmars312010, awed, seacat03, Rindou Kiara, zeynel, and Constance Truggle for reviewing!

Departed

That evening, Spock finally received the call he'd been waiting for.

"Starfleet has arrived. I have apprised Captain April of the colony's status. The Enterprise is taking over the investigation, incarceration, and rehabilitation efforts. Do you wish to depart?" asked Solkar.

"Very well," answered Spock quietly. Jim still slept at his side. "I will beam you and Dr. Picardo up. Prepare for transport."

He gently laid Jim on the bed and went to the transporter room. Solkar and Dr. Picardo appeared moments later.

"I have requested that Starfleet keep us informed on any news regarding Winona Kirk and Hoshi Sato," Solkar informed him. "We are cleared to depart."

"Very good," said Spock, pleased. No wonder Sarek considered him to be his best aide. He did not need to be asked to do things and anticipated their needs. He'd handled the whole situation with admirable competency. "Dr. Picardo, if you would join me?"

"Of course. Solkar," the doctor nodded to the aide in acknowledgement as he followed Spock to a private room. Solkar left for their small bridge and began the necessary procedures to pilot them home.

"Any trouble?" asked Spock when he was alone with the doctor.

"It started to rain," he said. "It was a close call. I had to run inside before everyone wondered why I wasn't getting wet. I covered myself by insisting that everyone move inside for their own health. Other than that, nobody seemed to notice anything strange."

"Good." They heard the engines roar to life as they entered warp.

Dr. Picardo leaned forward conspiratorially, lowering his voice even though they were alone. "Well, now that everything is settled here, why don't we get going? You must still have your ship, don't you? Otherwise I wouldn't be here."

"To what are you referring?"

"Well, we're not going to stay here, are we? I mean, we don't belong! We have lives to get back to." He gestured emphatically.

"If you are suggesting that I can transport us back to our own reality, the answer is no. I cannot."

"What do you mean, you cannot? I thought it was simple. Slingshot around the sun, right?" The doctor folded his arms.

"I'm afraid that would not work in the way you think. While the slingshot would, indeed, transport us to the future, it would not be a future either of us recognizes. Nero has irrevocably changed this universe through his violation of the Temporal Prime Directive. There is no telling what we would find, were we to attempt to leave. In addition, because of Nero's existence, I have responsibilities here that I cannot abandon. Our best chance to regain the future we know is to attempt to fix what Nero destroyed. You will live to see that future. I will not."

"We really are stuck here?" the doctor said in disbelief.

"Yes. Therefore, you must decide what you wish to do. Attempting to pass as human would be very risky. If you wish, I can put your program back into my ship's computer and periodically update you with the current events. If, instead, you do wish to take the risk of pretending to be human, Sarek and I can give you a false identity, as he did for me, and get you started in a new life."

"Do I have to give my answer right now?" the doctor asked, looking torn.

"No. At the very least, I would like you to give Dr. McCoy your report on Jim's condition. After that, however, you need to come to a decision."

"I see," contemplated the doctor. "This Jim. He isn't Captain James T. Kirk?"

"Indeed, he is," confirmed Spock.

"Ah. Well, that explains that. I was wondering what you were doing with a human child. And this Dr. McCoy must be Leonard H. McCoy."

"That is correct."

"Well. I look forward to meeting him."

"I have sent him a message. He will meet us as soon as we land. In the meantime, I suggest you read up the history of the past decade. There have been some differences from what you know."

"I'll get started right away! And make sure Jim eats something. But not too much. We need to get him slowly acclimated to eating again."

"Understood."

The journey to Earth was quiet and uneventful. They received no further news about Hoshi or Winona. Jim didn't know how he felt about what happened to his mom. He didn't want her to die, and in a way, he was relieved. Yet, selfishly, it added to his turmoil. What would happen with her now? Would Starfleet, even after all of this, still allow her custody of him? He did not share any of his thoughts with Spock or Dr. Picardo, though they both tried to draw him out. Jim didn't feel like thinking about it. It was bad enough that Tarsus replayed in his mind every waking moment like a horror movie. When he had a nightmare, he sat with Spock quietly until the worst of the terror passed.

Once they were within range, Jim contacted his friends and told them he was all right. They didn't know he was at Tarsus or anything that happened. He just told them the bare facts, and that he was on his way home. They updated him on everything that happened there and invited him to go out with them to an amusement park next month. Jim vaguely said he would ask Spock.

When they arrived at Earth, Solkar landed them with deft precision at the Vulcan Embassy. As promised, Dr. McCoy was waiting for them.

"Hey, old man," McCoy said, clapping Spock on the shoulder. "Solkar." He nodded to the solemn Vulcan, who gave a stiff nod back. "Jim! Kid, it's great to have you back!" He gave Jim a hug. Then he turned to the fourth member of the crew. "Dr. McCoy," he introduced himself, reaching out his hand.

"Dr. Robert Picardo. Nice to meet you," the hologram answered.

"I didn't know Spock brought you along," said McCoy.

Solkar raised an eyebrow and looked… less impassive.

"It's a nickname," Spock explained to Solkar. "It is a human thing." It did not seem to ease Solkar's curious expression much, however.

"Well, it was very last minute," said Picardo. "I barely knew I was going myself!"

"What kind of doctor are you anyway?" asked McCoy suspiciously. Spock had never spoken of him, and he wasn't wearing a Starfleet uniform. He hadn't just picked him up off the street, had he?

"Well, I'm retired. I just came along as a favor to Spock! If we can go somewhere more private, I can give you a full report on Jim's condition," Picardo said hurriedly, trying to redirect him.

Solkar gestured forward. "There are private rooms on the second level. Follow me."

Solkar and Picardo went on ahead. McCoy lagged behind with Spock and Jim. "There's something wrong with that guy! I just can't put my finger on what it is!"

No wonder McCoy was such a good doctor. He must have realized, on some level, that Picardo wasn't human. "Dr. Picardo is very unique," Spock said vaguely.

"Anyway. I know this might not be the best time, but, Jocelyn and I are engaged to be married!" said McCoy, his face breaking into a grin.

"Congratulations, doctor," said Spock evenly. Jim managed to smile at him.

McCoy poked Spock. "You sure know how to spook a guy. I almost didn't ask. As it is, I'm getting a pre-nup."

They arrived on the second floor, halting further conversation. Picardo, McCoy, and Spock had a meeting in one room, leaving Solkar and Jim in another.

"Your adopted father has many interesting idiosyncrasies," commented Solkar conversationally as they sat and waited.

Jim wondered if this was Vulcan for, "Your dad is weird." He shrugged.

"I am unfamiliar with that human gesture," Solkar stated.

"Uh, it means, well, it can mean different things. Like, I don't know. Or, your guess is as good as mine. Or, what can you do?"

"Uncertainty and tacit agreement," Solkar interpreted.

"Yeah," agreed Jim. Close enough. "It's called a shrug."

"Shrug. Interesting."

"Why do you think my dad has interesting idio- whatever?" Jim asked curiously after a minute of silence. What had Solkar seen?

"I observed many curiosities during my time with him. I merely wondered if you had any insight."

"Not really. He's pretty secretive about his past."

"Indeed."

Huh. For how intimidating he looked, Solkar was surprisingly easy to chat with. He loved Spock dearly, but it was nice to talk to someone who wasn't interested in getting him to open up about Tarsus. "What made you decide to become the Ambassador's aide?" he ventured, now that there were on the subject of the past.

"For reasons of a personal nature, my family is indebted to Ambassador Sarek and his family. I was named for his grandfather, in fact. Additionally," and he hesitated a little, "I find humans to be … interesting."

"Oh," said Jim. He guessed that would make sense for a guy named after the Vulcan who had discovered humans in the first place.

Meanwhile, Spock and the doctors had just finished discussing Jim's mental, emotional, and physical health.

"There is one more matter to discuss," said Spock, with a meaningful glance at Picardo. "Go ahead and tell him, doctor. He knows about where I'm from."

"I see. Well, you should know that I'm not human," started Picardo reluctantly. He wasn't ashamed of being a hologram, precisely, but humans did tend to act differently after learning he was one.

"I knew it!" said McCoy. "What are you, then? Betazoid or something?"

"No. I'm a hologram. I come from the same time as Spock here. He stored me on his ship. I'm wearing a mobile emitter so I can go wherever I want." He tapped it.

"What? Are all doctors holograms in the future?" McCoy asked in outrage, directing his question to Spock.

"I'm standing right here!" Picardo cut in, exasperated. "We are only used in emergencies. Except for me. It's a long story."

"Good." McCoy raked his hand through his hair in relief.

"What's that supposed to mean? I am perfectly capable of giving high quality medical treatment!"

"You're a goddam computer! It's like having a Vulcan do psychotherapy! Or asking a Tellarite to quiet a crying baby! It ain't natural!"

"I'm perfectly capable of empathizing with my patients! I do have feelings, you know," Picardo said, folding his arms and looking very put out. "This is like the beginning of my time on Voyager all over again!"

"Voyager?" McCoy frowned in confusion.

"I suppose now would be a good time to stop talking," Picardo mused, contrite.

Spock watched the exchange with no little amusement. He'd wondered, a time or two, what it would be like for them to meet. "More to the point. It you could keep quiet about him, that would be best. He hasn't decided whether he wishes to be stored until later or not."

"Can do," McCoy grumbled. "Human holograms. What is this world coming to? Next you'll be telling me that people live in holographic environments!"

Spock wisely kept his mouth shut. "We should get back to Jim."

"And I'm going to do my own examination of him," said McCoy.

Picardo rolled his eyes. The things he put up with! The people from his time held holograms in much higher regard! "As you wish," he said, insinuating he was being overly generous.

"Doctor, it is my recommendation that we deactivate you for the remaining journey. I will make your excuses," promised Spock before they could argue further.

"Very well," Picardo agreed. "Just reactivate me now and again, would you?"

"Agreed." Spock reached for his mobile emitter, deactivated him, and then pocketed it. McCoy watched the whole thing with a grumpy expression. They rejoined Jim, and said goodbye to Solkar. Dr. McCoy completed his examination and was very disgruntled to agree with Dr. Picardo's treatment and diagnosis. "But I'm still not buying the holographic doctor idea!" he hissed to Spock before he left.

Spock and Jim beamed home. Jim immediately went to his bedroom and collapsed on the bed. It felt unbelievably good to be back here. Yet, he still felt deeply shaken. It had so quickly and easily been taken away from him. What if it happened again? He wished Sophie was here. What happened to Hoshi? What was going to happen with his mother?

Spock appeared in his doorway. "Everything all right, Jim?" He could feel Jim's turmoil through the link. Both doctors were quite concerned about how withdrawn Jim was, especially considering how outgoing he was supposed to be by nature. They all agreed that it would be best if Spock first tried to help him process what had happened before taking further action.

"I'm fine," he said dully.

"'Fine' has variable definitions," Spock pointed out, humor in his tone. Jim glanced at him, the joke lost on him. "If you need to talk to me, I am available. Day or night. There is nothing so important that I cannot be interrupted to help you."

"Ok," said Jim. He should feel comforted by this, and in a way, he was. It was strange; he thought that when he'd come home, he'd feel better, that he could just leave Tarsus behind. But the reality of the genocide, shooting his starving horse, the starvation of the colony, on top of everything else, still replayed relentlessly in his mind.

"You are not alone," Spock insisted. Then he decided to drop it. Jim had just returned home. He'd give him a little time to readjust, and then try again. "Would you like to have your friends over? They are eager to see you." Perhaps time with his friends would comfort him. He knew that as his parent figure, Jim still had mixed feelings about him.

"Not really," said Jim, surprising him. He would comm them, but he just couldn't face them yet.

"Very well. If there is something you want, please ask for it. I will be meditating." He'd forgone the practice in the last few days, and he badly needed it.

A couple days passed. Jim continued to refuse to talk about what happened, and mostly spent his time reading his books. Spock restored Dr. Picardo to the Jellyfish. They decided to shut down his program for the time being and store him there.

Then, Starfleet sent a social worker to talk to them, but they would not go into detail beforehand regarding the reason for her visit. Spock welcomed her in, and sat on the couch with Jim while the social worker took the chair. She introduced herself as Judi Keeler.

"Well, I know you're both wondering why I'm here." Judi smiled tightly. This would not be an easy visit. "First of all, your mother has been discharged from Starfleet. All surviving personnel were required to go through extensive evaluations. They had all suffered trauma, of course, but the doctors determined that many of her problems were preexisting, most likely for some time. They had not been caught before because the examinations for the short assignments she took are a lot less rigorous than the ones for the deep space missions. She is no longer fit for active duty. Her role in the coup is also unclear, and we don't believe her testimony is reliable. We have made the decision to commit her to a rehabilitation facility for the foreseeable future. That, of course, means that she has lost all custody of you, Jim. You, Selek, now have full custody. In fact, Starfleet has been most impressed by your diligence, Selek. Without it, the tragedy of Tarsus may have been far, far worse."

Spock looked at Jim. He could feel on some level that he was relieved at the news, but he still seemed largely unhappy. It seemed that was but a 'drop in the bucket' of whatever was troubling him.

"Your house was ransacked, but we did recover some items that will be shipped here in the next few days." The social worker gathered herself again. "Ambassador Sarek's aide, Solkar, also made us aware that you would like to know what happened to Hoshi."

Jim turned to her tensely, attention riveted.

"We finally tracked down what happened. I'm afraid to say she didn't make it. I'm sorry."

Jim's face screwed up in pain, and he left the room.

"I do not yet know what happened," Spock told her, stricken. "He must have bonded with her during his time there."

"You should put him in therapy too, if you haven't already," the social worker said sympathetically.

"I will take that under advisement," Spock stated. "I need to be there for him. Is there anything else you wish to discuss?"

"No, I'll let you talk to him. But think about it. That was a really traumatic thing to happen to a boy that age, especially with everything that's happened to him already."

"I will," Spock promised.

"Good luck," she said. "The funeral is to be held tomorrow at Starfleet Headquarters in San Francisco." With that, she walked out the door.

Spock hurried to Jim's room, but the door was shut. "May I come in?" He heard nothing, which concerned him, so he opened the door and entered. Jim lay on the bed, crying silently. Spock laid a gentle hand on him. "I am sorry, Jim." He sat down next to him, and waited for his sobs to ease.

Finally, Jim spoke. "I don't want to feel anymore. Vulcans – file away their emotions, don't they?" Jim asked, his voice cracking. "I want to learn how."

"Jim," Spock said softly. "I struggled for emotional balance for years. Emotions are, at times, inconvenient, or even agonizing, but they make us human. I know it is difficult, but you must learn to accept them."

"I don't want to. I want to learn how Vulcans do it. Don't you think I could learn?" Jim asked.

If the situation weren't so dire, Spock would have been hard pressed to keep a straight face. Kirk Prime had once attempted Vulcan disciplines just for the challenge. It had been a failure of epic proportions. Spock believed Jim could do anything he set his mind to, but that did not include shutting down integral parts of himself. Yet, there were programs on Vulcan that might prove beneficial to Jim's need to process and recover from what happened. Maybe this would be for the best. "It is a possibility. I will look into what Vulcan might have to offer. Hoshi's funeral is tomorrow. If you wish, we will go, and then I will see about making arrangements for you."

"Ok," agreed Jim.

Spock sensed he still had a question. "If there is something you wish to say, do not be afraid to tell me."

Jim bit his lip uncertainly. "Why don't you teach me? You really helped me with the self-defense. It came in handy."

Spock did not like to think of why the self-defense had come in handy. But, that was not relevant to his question. "I cannot help you learn because, from the Vulcan point of view, I am emotionally compromised towards you. It would be likened to the Earth idiom, the blind leading the blind."

"Oh," Jim replied.

"Do not concern yourself. I will find something suitable for you."

The next day, they attended Hoshi's service. A very large crowd of people attended. Spock recognized many people. Afterward, people came up to the stand to tell stories about her. T'Pol and Admiral Archer told the most. Jim blankly thought that, for not being into the "mushy friendship thing," T'Pol's words about her were markedly warm.

During the reception, Admiral Archer approached Jim. "Hey, son. You're James Kirk, right?"

"Yeah," said Jim shyly, keeping close to Spock. Admiral Archer was a legend. He couldn't believe he'd approached him.

"I'm told you were the last one to talk to her. Can you tell me something about her final days? I regret not being there for her."

Spock glanced at Jim, wondering what he would say. As of yet, he'd still said nothing about what had happened.

"She was really determined to save the colony. She spent days rigging the comm so that we could send a signal out. And in the end, she decided that she was the one who should try to warn everybody, despite how dangerous it was. She was a – a hero." Jim's voice cracked, and he looked away.

Archer, for his part, looked really grieved himself. T'Pol had come up behind him during the conversation and listened impassively. "She will be missed by many people," she intoned, and the slight tremor in her voice suggested she was one of them.

Despite the graveness of the situation, Spock found himself intrigued with the opportunity to talk to T'Pol. He'd never gotten an opportunity during his younger days. "I grieve with thee," said Spock.

"It is appreciated," she said. "I find myself needing to regain perspective. When I return to Vulcan, I will perform the tal t'lee."

Spock started at that. This would be perfect. "Would you accept Jim for this ritual as well?"

"We do not normally accept humans," she said. "However, due to the circumstances, I will make an exception."

"Tal t'lee?" questioned Archer, mispronouncing it.

T'Pol did not correct him. "It is a Vulcan ritual where a Vulcan elder guides young Vulcans to greater emotional control through meditation. I find the teaching process to be as much of a learning process for me as it is for the children."

"Oh, well. As for me, I'm taking a little R&R. Spend more time with the dogs. Excuse me, I just saw someone who I need to talk to." With that, Archer left.

"If you will give me your comm number, I can send you the details," said T'Pol. They exchanged information. Jim still didn't quite understand what they were talking about, but he trusted Spock, and the idea of learning from someone who'd been a close acquaintance of Hoshi gave him confidence.

Spock turned to go, but someone ran smack into him.

"Oh, eh, excuse me sir," said a very familiar voice with a Scottish accent. "I shoulda looked where I was goin'!"

"Montgomery Scott?" said Spock in disbelief.

"Oh, uh, hello. Have we met?" Scotty asked awkwardly. He drank rather often, so it was possible he'd met him after having one too many and didn't remember it. God, he hoped he hadn't puked on him or something!

"We have not. However, I hear you are one of the top engineering students at Starfleet."

"Oh, well, they're exaggeratin' if you don't mind me saying sir," Scotty said modestly. He'd never talked much to Vulcans before. He had nothing against them; they just didn't tend to run with his kind of crowd. What to say? "Well, it's a shame about Sato, isn't it? I grew up with the crew of the Enterprise as my heroes. I plan on serving on that ship someday, yanno?" Great, now he was running his mouth. Well, he was on Earth, what did the Vulcan expect?

"I expect you shall," said Spock, to Scotty's surprise. "Best of luck, Mr. Scott."

"Thank you, sir. And you too, laddie!" he added to Jim, before they parted ways. Well, that hadn't been so bad. Maybe he'd try to talk to Vulcans more often.

Spock, for his part, was cheered by meeting his old friend. While his relationship with Scotty had never rivaled the one he had with Kirk Prime or even McCoy, they had always got along well and had strong ties of loyalty. He hoped he'd get the chance to talk to him again sometime.

However, he could feel that Jim was reaching the end of his rope. He made his goodbyes and transported them home. Jim immediately went to his room. Spock checked his padd, and noted that T'Pol had already sent him the time and place of the ritual. It was to start next week, and continue for the next two weeks. Jim would be joining twenty other Vulcan children. They could stay in a house nearby for the duration. Spock could only hope that, through the tal t'lee, Jim would find the healing he needed.

I know you guys didn't want me to kill off Hoshi. Sorry. :( But, I think you've all probably figured out my reasoning. :)