Author's Notes: In Chapter 10, anxious to learn more about her past with Spock, Nyota has a talk with her close friend, Shaniqua. Spock asks Christine Chapel for a favor.

Warning: The latter part of the chapter depicts a darker side of Spock that may be disturbing to some readers. It emanates from the author's attempt to draw distinctions between humans and Vulcans. The author believes there is precedence to believe Vulcans can be quite ruthless when necessary and, thus, has written this element into Spock's behavior toward one of the characters. If you feel like throwing rocks about it, I welcome your comments. I would enjoy discussing the matter in more detail with you if you are interested.

Your comments – complimentary or not - are always welcome.

9:15 PM At an Off-Campus TeleCom Center

Dressed in civilian clothes, Uhura sat in a private booth talking to her New York-based actress friend, Shaniqua Washington, who spoke from her small Harlem apartment.

"Nyota, what do you mean you're having difficulty remembering anything about your affair with that Vulcan?" Shaniqua asked. "How is that possible?"

"I don't know." Uhura answered.

"I don't know isn't good enough, Nyota." Her friend replied. "Did you ask Spock about it?"

"Yes, but he was reluctant to tell me much, since he thought a therapist should be the one to lead me through the memory recovery process. He believes this strategy will minimize any distress that may result trying to reconcile the memories with the present."

Shaniqua paused, before commenting, "Well, I suppose that makes sense. But, if that is the case, why are you trying to pump me for information?"

"Right now, all I have are fragments of conversations and a few images that I recall from dreams I've been having. Spock confirmed the occurrence of one of those experiences the other day. I believe talking with you may expedite the recovery process if I had a few more concrete details to share with the therapist."

"And so I guess you're also going to approach Spock, again. Right?"

"No." Nyota answered. "At the club, he appeared quite adamant about not telling me anything more besides saying . . . he loved me."

Shaniqua's skepticism had no trouble being communicated through the TelCom. "From what you told me, Spock certainly had more to say than that. Although I must admit it takes some balls to come straight out and tell you he was ready rock some other woman's world the other night, but then thought better of it."

"That's not exactly how he put it, Shaniqua."

"Same-Difference, Nyota, and you know it." Shaniqua replied. "At least, you had the wherewithal to call him out on it."

Uhura pressed on. "Shaniqua, what do you know about me and Spock?"

"I know I'm not the first one of our friends of which you tried to ask that question."

"Yasmin's business took her halfway across the quadrant. And, when I called Habibah to talk with her about it, she said you probably had the best information on the matter."

"She did, did she?" Shaniqua replied with a note of sarcasm, "I will have to thank Habibah personally for that referral."

"Shaniqua, please you have to tell me what you know."

"Why wouldn't I have the same reservations as Spock?"

Uhura responded, "Whatever led to my loss of memory obviously occurred without any of my friends' knowledge of that specific event. However, what you may be able to do is frame the context for this occurrence. That will, at least, be something I can use during therapy to put all of the pieces back together."

"Nyota, from what you have told me, only a few days ago you allowed that Vulcan to hold you in his arms and tell you all you wanted to hear. What could I possibly tell you now that will make a difference in the way you deal with this matter?"

Uhura hesitated and then said, "Shaniqua, did I ever speak with you or any of the precious ones1 about making love with Spock?"

Seeing a look of shock on her friend's face gave Uhura her answer.

After Shaniqua found her tongue, she asked, "Did you have sex with him, Nyota? When did this happen?"

"I don't know for sure. It was just a feeling I had when he held me."

Shaniqua sighed and shook her head.

Nyota asked again. "So, did I ever talk about Spock and me in that way."

Her friend answered, "The last time we spoke about your love life, you spoke of your plans about spending a romantic semester break with Kirk. At the time, you seemed determined to lose your virginity to him."

"I remember you were against me going through with it."

Shaniqua remarked, "Then, perhaps, you'll also recall why I thought it was a bad move for you."

Uhura paused to try to remember the conversation. Finally, her face beamed as the memory came to her, "You believed . . . you believed I was actually in love with someone else."

"Right." Her friend confirmed.

"Shaniqua, was that someone Spock?"

The actress was not so forthcoming with her answer, but she finally replied, "Yes."

Uhura took a few moments to gather her thoughts. "And then . . . I called off the trip with Kirk, ending our romance because . . . because . . . What was it? I don't even remember what I actually did last Spring Break."

"Whatever it was you were very secretive about it. Yasmin told me she tried to contact you to see if you could come down and meet her in San Diego, but she couldn't get you to answer your communicator. So, after a few days, she gave up trying to reach you."

"Those days that I can't recall . . . nearly an entire week of my life . . . Spock must have been involved somehow." Uhura concluded. "He's been the common factor in all of these incidents in which I have suffered some sort of memory loss."

"Oh, Nyota . . . I don't like this." Shaniqua warned. "I don't like this at all. If Spock is the common factor, then how do you know he is not somehow involved in your memory loss?"

"I thought about that, but if that were the case why would Spock be the one who suggested I seek professional help to regain my memory. In fact, he said tonight he would attempt to make arrangement for my treatment."

"He also has known about your problem for over nearly five months. Why did he wait until now?"

The question stymied Uhura. She could only respond, "I don't know."

"That's not a good enough answer, Nyota."

"But, I also don't know how someone like me with my background, ever fell in love with someone like him." Uhura confessed.

"Nyota, you are not a bigot." Shaniqua tried to reassure her. "That's your father's flaw, not yours."

"That's what I've repeatedly told myself." She responded. "Yet, I know firsthand it is next to impossible to be left unscathed when you're brought up by a parent so filled with hate for those unlike himself. I've just got to believe that for me to fall in love with Spock, there must have been something . . . something so powerful between usthat somehow it overcame all of the doubts."

Shaniqua knew how much her dear friend was in love with the Vulcan. Yet, she felt a gnawing unease that made her unsure of how to advise Uhura.

"Well," Uhura began, "I better let you get some sleep. I know you have a show tomorrow."

"Are you heading straight back to campus?" Shaniqua asked.

"Kind of." Uhura replied.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"On my way to the TeleCom Center, I saw something that looked like a café or coffeehouse."

"Don't tell me you're going to stop there for a snack." Shaniqua remarked. "You ought to know anything you eat at this time of night will go straight to your hips."

"I'm not really hungry, Shaniqua. It's just that . . . for some reason it looked vaguely familiar to me. I believe the name of it was – The House of Diarmuid. I just want to check it out."

"You just want to check it out by yourself?" Shaniqua exclaimed. "Nyota, sometimes I wish I could just reach across that screen and shake you."

"Stop trying to baby me, Shaniqua." Uhura laughed. "After all that's happened to me, what could possibly go wrong now?"

10:11 PM At the House of Diarmuid

As Diarmuid served a pot of tea and biscuits to a table of patrons, a familiar blonde woman caught his eye as she entered the teahouse and headed straight towards Spock's table. It did not take the Irishman long to make his way to the now seated couple.

Diarmuid remarked, "What's this? Déjà vu?"

"Good to see you, too, Diarmuid." Christine retorted.

Diarmuid continued, "I thought we already played this scene. Christine returns - Spock drops his guard – Christine thinks she's got a shot at him – then, the Vulcan gives her one of those ambiguous statements about their relationship that gives the lady hope – Spock breaks her heart - End of story."

"Another cup, Diarmuid." Spock ordered, his tone betraying his displeasure with his Manager's comments.

"No, don't send him away, yet, Spock." Christine quipped. "I'm waiting to hear the part about how the lonely middle-aged Teahouse Manager realizes just how pathetic his life really is."

"That will be the day." Diarmuid snorted, as he moved away from their table.

Spock remarked. "Christine, you've known Diarmuid long enough not to allow him to annoy you."

"Just what is he, Spock?" Christine asked. "Your court jester or alter ego?"

"The occasions Diarmuid steps across the boundary of good taste far outnumber the times he is able to confine his remarks within the bounds of propriety. "Spock observed. "At this stage, I believe it unlikely for him to change his behavior."

"And, what about you, Spock?" Christine asked pointedly. "Any chance you might change your behavior?"

"If you would like to talk about last Friday night, then let's do so." Spock responded coolly. "If it would give you more satisfaction to express yourself physically, I will sit still and accept your punishment. Which will it be, Christine?"

Diarmuid set down the cup in front of Christine with a thud and walked away without saying a word. Spock filled both of their cups. This time, Christine did not wait for the male to first sample the tea as in the Vulcan tradition. Instead, she brought the steaming hot beverage to her lips and drank without flinching.

Christine sat the cup down and asked, "Who is it this time?"

"Someone with whom you have previously treated . . . Cadet Uhura."

"Cadet Uhura?" Christine appeared surprised. "But . . . "

"What is it that stifles your tongue?" He inquired.

Christine took a few moments, before telling him, "Last May, I ran into Dr. McCoy at a conference. We met for drinks and he told me you and Ms. Uhura were no longer a couple due to an unfortunate event."

Spock confessed without hesitation, "Ms. Uhura was pregnant with my child, but the baby was lost in the first trimester."

The Vulcan noted Christine's expression seemed unaffected by his disclosure.

He asked, "Did Dr. McCoy already divulge this information to you?"

"Leonard? Of course not."

"Then, how did you know?"

"I suspected as much. It certainly is not the first time such a thing has happened." She remarked. "But in this day and age, its incidence is much less likely unless one of the partners intentionally creates a situation where a pregnancy is more likely to occur."

"Christine, the pregnancy was not planned by either party. However, when the seed took root and came to light . . . " Suddenly, he spoke in hushed tones when he acknowledged, " . . . the child was very much desired by both."

Christine could not recall a time Spock had ever lied to her. She knew she would need to handle the subject with great delicacy.

"I am sorry for your loss." She told him. "It must have been difficult for both of you."

Spock could hear the sincerity in Christine's voice. He then told her, "Cadet Uhura . . . Nyota . . . she does not remember. She recalls little about our relationship with the exception of snatches that reveal themselves in her dreams."

"How is that possible?" Christine asked.

"These memories were suppressed through a mind meld."

"By you?"

"No." He answered. "It was done by another without my knowledge."

"Can the process be reversed?"

"Not in that manner." The Vulcan replied. "It would potentially do more harm, than good without the results one desires."

Christina shook her head and sighed, "Poor girl."

Spock appealed to Christine, "Then, you will take her case?"

"Not so fast, Spock. I still have a few more questions for you."

"I am listening."

Christina took another sip of her tea to give herself more time to carefully choose her words. "Spock, why did you come to me with this? The Medical Treatment Facility no longer outsources its psychiatric services. There is now a staff of highly regarded psychiatrists and therapists who would be able to prescribe the proper strategy of treatment for her."

"You have previous experience with Nyota."2

"And, you also are aware that I am in love with you." She charged.

"In what way does this represent a change from the prior circumstance?" Spock retorted.

"The last time, I accepted her case, because I was well paid for my services."

"Christine, have we not always been honest with each other?"

"It was a financial transaction . . . nothing more." She contented.

Spock's eyes bore down on her when he told her, "You came when I called for you, just like the way you did tonight."

"Bastard!" She spat out. "You bastard!"

Diarmuid appeared at the table with a fresh pot of tea. Taking note of the stern looking Vulcan and the distraught woman, he quipped, "Looks like I missed the good part. Where are we at now in the story?"

One look from Spock caused the Irishman to set down the pot and move quickly from the table without another word. The Vulcan picked up the teapot by its handle and refreshed her cup. He then waited patiently for Christine to take a drink of tea to calm her exposed nerves.

Spock's voice took on a business-like tone as he remarked, "Starfleet does not provide the same protections for patient-therapist confidentiality as one would find in the private sector. Rule 513 lists a broad number of exceptions that would make a Starfleet therapist duty-bound to report certain discoveries that violate Academy policies."

Christine commented, "Such as a clandestine relationship between a Cadet and a superior officer that led to a pregnancy."

"For me, there would undoubtedly be a reprimand and quite possibly a demotion. However, the long-term effect on my career in Starfleet or as a scientist would be negligible. That is not true for Nyota. Professionally, it would be quite difficult for her to recover."

Christine could not dispute Spock's assessment. There would be no parity in the way the two would be treated. The Vulcan was far too important due to his own achievements and family ties for Starfleet to subject him to any significant penalties. And, most certainly, the brass would find a way to cover up the incident to save face. In contrast, there would be little chance for Uhura to rise up through Starfleet ranks. Even as a civilian, she might find opportunities to advance career to be severely limited or compromised.

Spock continued. "I need someone who I can trust to maintain a level of strict secrecy one would expect in civilian life."

"Why not Dr. McCoy?" Christine asked. "He already has proven he can be trusted with such matters."

"There is an aspect regarding the circumstances of the loss of the child which is unknown to Dr. McCoy. It would call into question certain activities that were performed for the sake of Federation security.3 After Nyota receives the professional assistance needed for her to recall the suppressed memories, I will tell her the truth regarding what happened to the child."

"I take it this truth is an unpleasant reality."

"I fear when it is revealed, I will lose her." Spock admitted solemnly.

"Then, why tell her, Spock?" Christine suggested. "If there is little chance she would find out otherwise, why take the risk?"

Spock eyes suddenly appeared to be distant. Then, he looked back to Christine and told her, "I once thought it might be possible . . . but an elder showed me deceit will always find a way to expose itself."

The Vulcan waited a few more moments, before asking, "Have you exhausted your questions?"

"I believe I have heard enough." She answered.

"Then, tell me." He demanded to know. "Will you take her case or not?"

Christine shook her head. "Spock, one day you'll find that not all women are as . . . hopeless as I am. I do not understand what there is to gain, if your revelation drives her away from you."

The Vulcan declared, "I will protect what is mine, Christine. It is immaterial whether or not Nyota ultimately rejects me when she learns the truth. I will still remain bound to her for the rest of our lives."

The words came from her mouth before she could stop the flow . . .

"All right . . ." She told him, as she looked him in his eyes and placed her hand over his. "I will do this . . . for her." She lied. "I will do this for her."

Diarmuid finished clearing a table and picked up his tray, when he saw a familiar but seemingly bewildered face standing at the entrance to the tearoom.

"There's my girl!" He called out, as he rushed towards her. "Nyota . . . I knew you'd be back!"

Author's Note: In Chapter 11, Nyota discovers Spock with another woman at the teahouse. The Vulcan finds and confronts Nyota about the situation. And, yes - passions will erupt. However, please remember, this is still a part of the flashback preceding Nyota's theft of the sleeping pill. As you will recall, by that time she has cut off relations with Spock. Trouble is on the horizon from a competing interest and it will not take you long to guess who will attempt to act as the spoiler. The author promises it will not take another 10 chapters for Spock and Uhura to get back together, but I still wanted to give you an idea of the trajectory of the story.

Hope you stay around to find out how it all comes together.

Your comments are always welcome.

1 The precious ones is a term Uhura uses in reference to non-Academy friends – Yasmin, Habibah and Shaniqua.

2 Christine served as Uhura's nurse-therapist when the Cadet dealt with post-traumatic stress after an attempted rape. In private practice at the time, Spock secretly hired and arranged for Christine to treat Uhura.

3 McCoy thinks Uhura had a miscarriage and is unaware the loss of the baby has connections to a Romulan espionage plot dramatized in my story, Operation: No Return.