"Dr. Sullivan?" Mac said hesitantly, interrupted the conversation the neurologist was having with a nurse just outside of Stella's room.
"Detective Taylor, is something wrong?" Dr. Sullivan asked, concerned at the tone of Mac's typically stoic voice.
"She has amnesia," Mac informed him.
"Detective, I did warn you that she might have difficulty remembering things," Dr. Sullivan cautioned. "With this sort of injury, it isn't uncommon for people to lose several weeks, perhaps even a few months in rare occasions."
"What about eight years?" Mac asked.
"Eight years?" Dr. Sullivan repeated in surprise. "Are you certain?"
"At least that long," Mac said. "I suppose it could be more, actually."
"How do you know?" Dr. Sullivan asked. "Did she say something specific?"
"She asked…she asked when Claire was coming to see her," Mac admitted with a bit of difficulty.
"Who?" Dr. Sullivan asked.
"My wife," Mac said, leaning heavily against the wall. "She died in the World Trade Center attacks. Stella and I, we weren't all that close, not before Claire died…Stella was Claire's best friend, so she was my friend, but when my wife was alive, Stella would have expected to see Claire here long before me if she'd been injured."
"I see," Dr. Sullivan nodded. "Well, unexpected things do happen with these types of injuries."
"This is just temporary, right?" Mac asked. "She's going to remember soon?"
"Well, there was no physical trauma apparent on her scans, which is a promising sign in cases of memory loss," Dr. Sullivan said cautiously. "Of course, that doesn't mean there couldn't be damaged areas too small to appear on our scans. The brain is a tricky organ, Detective Taylor, and much of it we still don't have any understanding of. I wish I could give you a definitive prognosis, be able to tell you if x happens, then y will happen in three days, but it doesn't work that way."
"Can you tell me anything, then?" Mac asked in frustration.
"In light of this new development, I would like to run a few more tests," Dr. Sullivan said. "I'd also like to get a consult from a colleague of mine who has significantly more experience in dealing with patients with this type of memory loss. She'll be able to offer a better picture of how to handle and treat Detective Bonasera."
"How long will that take?" Mac asked.
"Several hours, at least, but probably more," Dr. Sullivan said.
"And in the meantime?" Mac asked. "Can I see her again? Can my team see her?"
"I'd recommend against it," Dr. Sullivan said. "Am I correct in assuming that ten years ago, Detective Bonasera wouldn't have known any of them?"
"I suppose not," Mac agreed.
"Then until I have a better handle on the extent of her memory loss, I'd rather not risk it," Dr. Sullivan said. "I'm not afraid of them upsetting her, but at this point, we need to determine her exact memory loss before anyone accidentally slips details about her life to her."
"Is that a bad thing?" Mac asked. "I didn't say much to her, but shouldn't she hear as much as possible in case something triggers her memory?"
"Not at first, no," Dr. Sullivan said. "Her memory, if it does return, will likely do so in fits and spurts, not all at once, and it's important that we be able to know that those are actually her memories returning."
"What else would they be?" Mac asked.
"Patients with amnesia know that they're supposed to be remembering things," Dr. Sullivan explained. "Their brains sometimes go into a bit of overdrive in an effort to find those memories again. If the patient is given too many details about the time they've lost, the brain has been known to, on occasion, create false memories around those details. Even though they aren't real, these memories can seem exceedingly real to the patient – as a doctor, I need to know when she's recovering her own memories, rather than wondering if they're being fabricated by the brain to match what she does know about the last few years of her life."
"That makes sense," Mac nodded. "So we're just supposed to wait around again?"
"I'd suggest you go home and get some sleep, Detective," Dr. Sullivan said. "I'd suggest all of you do that. We won't know much more until tomorrow morning, anyway."
Knock. Knock.
Kelly set down the remote on the side of her bed and glanced up at the doorway, half expecting to find one of the Monroe brothers – her brothers, as much as she still was uncomfortable referring to them that way – hovering in the doorway, almost feeling guilty at the relief she felt when she didn't see them there.
"Hey kid," Matt Harrison said nervously, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he glanced up from his shoes to look at his sister-in-law.
"Matt," Kelly said softly. "I wasn't expecting to see you here."
"Yeah, well, I heard you'd been brought here and I figured I oughta come by, make sure you and the baby were alright," Matt shrugged. "'Sides, you know Ryan would kick my ass if I let you stay here alone, Kel."
"Yeah," Kelly nodded sadly. "He would have."
"Woulda, yeah," Matt said, correcting himself. "Don't really know how to get used to that whole past tense thing. I keep thinkin' he's gonna come through the door any minute now, laughing about…"
"…How he pulled the greatest practical joke ever and we all fell for it, hook, line and sinker," Kelly filled in knowingly, shaking her head as the tears welled in her eyes. "I know, I do too."
"I heard you went to see him," Matt said, taking a few tentative steps into the room.
"I had to," Kelly said. "I had to see it myself…see that it wasn't just some big, sick prank. And even with that, it doesn't feel real. None of it seems possible."
"I know," Matt said sympathetically. "I…I had just talked to him an hour or two earlier. He got lost on the way to Millie's Bakery with Janie…we only grew up walkin' there every Sunday, don't know how he managed that one."
"Ryan could get lost walking a straight line," Kelly said with a quick laugh. "You know that as well as I do, Matt."
"Yeah, I do," Matt agreed.
"Hey Matt?" Kelly asked hesitantly.
"Yeah, Kel?" Matt asked.
"Why did you lie?" Kelly asked, turning to look him in the eye as his brow furrowed in confusion.
"Lie about what?" he asked.
"Jimmy," Kelly said. "They told me you and Emma said you didn't know who Janie's 'Uncle Jimmy' was. Why did you lie?"
"I didn't," Matt said, sighing as he ran a hand through his hair. "Emma did most of the talkin' last night…to be honest, I don't remember half of what they asked, I was just tryin' to get my head around my baby brother really bein' gone. And when she said she didn't know him…by the time I realized what she had said, they'd moved on to other questions. I don't know why Emma wouldn't say, but it didn't seem like that big of a deal."
"Do you even know why they wanted to know?" Kelly asked in frustration.
"I figured Janie was askin' for him," Matt shrugged. "I know Ryan said they were gonna have dinner sometime during the trip."
"Did you know that Janie saw it?" Kelly asked. "She saw Ryan get shot…she saw the shooter, Matt."
"No, I didn't know that," Matt said. "I'm sorry, Kel…she shouldn't have had to see anything like that. Is she okay? Where is she?"
"She's pretty shaken up…it'll take time, but she'll be okay," Kelly said. "My sister took her to get something to eat. Matt, she says she saw Jimmy shoot Ryan."
"She what?" Matt asked in shock.
"Janie told the detectives that 'Uncle Jimmy' shot Ryan," Kelly explained. "That's why they were asking about him."
"Oh my God," Matt muttered. "Kelly, I swear, if I had thought for a second he had something to do with this…"
"You would have said something, I know," Kelly nodded. "But Matt, I know Emma's your wife and all, but…"
"She had no reason to lie," Matt said knowingly, taking a deep breath as he shook his head. "I know, Kel, I know."
"It doesn't make any sense," Kelly said.
"Unless…" Matt's voice trailed off as a horrified look crossed his face and he sank into the chair near Kelly's bed. "Shit."
"What?" Kelly asked in concern. "Matt, what is it?"
"She knows something," Matt said. "Emma knew that Jimmy was involved; otherwise, why not just tell that detective who he was?"
"But how would she know?" Kelly asked.
"Well, I know you know they were having an affair; I think everyone knows that," Matt said.
"You knew?" Kelly asked in surprise.
"I'm not completely blind, Kelly," Matt said. "I've overlooked a lot in my marriage, but that doesn't mean I didn't see it."
"I'm sorry," Kelly said.
"Yeah," Matt nodded sadly. "You know, it sounds crazy, but these last couple of years, I was a little jealous of Ryan."
"Why?" Kelly asked. "Because of the money?"
"Not the money," Matt shook his head. "No, Ryan's had money for a long time…I didn't care about that. If I'd cared about having money, I would have never joined the NYPD. I've got a roof over my head, food on the table for my kids…I've got everything that I need, financially speaking."
"So what was it you were jealous of?" Kelly asked.
"You," Matt said.
"Me?" she asked skeptically.
"Well, not you specifically," he clarified. "But his relationship with you. He was head over heels for you, Kel, and you felt the same way about him. We all thought it was some sort of midlife crisis, some fling he'd get over in a few months, but the longer you guys were together, the happier you got. Do you have any idea how rare that is? How lucky he had to be to find that?"
"No," Kelly shook her head. "I was the lucky one, Matt. Ryan was the first person to ever make me feel like I was loved completely and unconditionally…the first person I really and truly thought was never going to leave me."
"You know if he'd had any choice…" Matt began.
"I know," Kelly said. "He never would have left."
"No, he wouldn't have," Matt agreed, noting the way Kelly bit down on her lower lip to hold back tears as he placed a comforting hand on hers. "Kel, have you cried for him yet?"
"I can't," Kelly insisted. "I've got the baby, and I've got to hold it together for Janie, and there's all this family crap that's about blow in here, and then there's the investigation, and I…"
"Hey," Matt interrupted gently, carefully moving Kelly's hand and taking a seat on the side of her bed. "The baby is going to be fine, Kelly. Janie's not here right now, and whatever family you're dealing with, if you don't want them around, you just tell me and I'll kick 'em out on their meddlesome asses, got it? But you need to cry, Kelly…you can't hold it in, and you don't have to be strong for me."
Matt took Kelly's meek nod as a sign of encouragement, reaching out and pulling her into his arms, his grip tightening as the tears came hard and fast, her whole body shaking as she finally let her guard drop completely.