Chapter Ten
"You'll have to move on without us."
This news did not come as a shock to Adrian or anyone else in the group but Maria looked to Gilbert with mild disdain.
"I want to stay and help look for Feli!" she said.
Adrian frowned as Gregor stepped forward to place a hand on her shoulder.
"We have to get you to your family Maria," he said gently.
"Whatever! A couple days isn't going to make a difference as long as I get there alive. Feli is my friend and I want to help looking for him!" she cried, shoving Gregor's hand away.
"Maria… sweetheart…" Iris tried but Maria wouldn't hear it.
"I've proven that I can take care of myself over and over again since we left. Why can't I stay and help? It's not like I'm by myself, I'll have Ludwig and Gilbert with me."
"And how will you get to Belgium, Maria? They're going in a completely different direction," Adelaide stated.
"But…"
Gilbert stepped up and placed a gentle hand on Maria's shoulder, causing her to look at him.
"The most important thing right now, Maria, is for you to reach Belgium safely and get back to your family," he said gently. "Ludwig and I will find Feliciano, it'll be alright. It's dangerous to stay back with us and the last thing Feli would want is for you to risk your well-being looking for him."
This seemed to hit something with the girl and she nodded. "Alright Gil. My full name is Maria Kraemer. You remember that and let me know he's okay as soon as you can," she said firmly.
"Of course," he said with a grin. "Someone as awesome as me will definitely find him in one piece and let you know."
A small smile played at her lips but it was a little sad. Suddenly she wrapped Gilbert in a tight hug. "Be safe."
"You too Maria," he said softly, returning the embrace.
After giving a quick hug to Ludwig as well, the men shook hands, they said a few parting words and Adrian's party disappeared into the trees.
No sooner had they vanished from sight did Ludwig disappear as well to search for Feliciano. While separating would have covered more ground, the brothers decided to stick together to reduce the chance of losing each other.
The rest of the day was spent scouring the area and endlessly calling Feliciano's name. By the time it grew dark they had found not even a hint of what direction he had gone.
There was a tense silence when they settled down for the night as Gilbert struggled on deciding what was the best way of approaching the subject that was on his mind.
"Ludwig, I think it might be best if we move on tomorrow," he said carefully.
The look on his brother's face could have killed and was enough to force Gilbert back a step.
"No! We stay and search some more!" Ludwig signed angrily.
Gilbert easily realized that there was no arguing on this matter. Even if he decided to move on, it was very likely that Ludwig would just stay behind without him and the last thing he wanted was for them to get separated as well.
Sighing, he said, "fine, but after tomorrow we move on. There's a chance he isn't even here. He could have moved on with us in hopes of meeting up with us somewhere."
Ludwig was not happy about this but could not argue the logic and thus agreed.
As he settled down to sleep a few minutes later, he found that it was difficult to close his eyes and ended up rolling onto his back focusing on the night sounds that surrounded him. Wind shaking the branches of the trees, the subtle sound of bugs, the occasional gun fire in the distance, some call of a bird or wild animal. Peering up at what stars he could see through the canopy above him. After a while he let the peacefulness of the forest push him into sleep.
The place Ludwig was in was oddly familiar, but he could have sworn that he had never been there before. Green grass cushioned his steps as turned in a circle. Off in the distance there was a small village, the other direction a forest that trailed into snow topped mountains. He seemed to be standing in a valley of sorts, a layer of bright green stretching on for miles. He wasn't sure how he got there but he couldn't really argue with the warmth and peacefulness of it.
After a moment of enjoying the scenery, he decided to head in the direction of the village but only made it a few steps when a familiar voice called his name. Pausing, he slowly turned around and his heart flew at the sight of a red haired Italian boy beaming a bright smile at him.
"Ludwig, where are you going?" he asked, laughter in his voice.
Ludwig didn't have an answer, where was he going?
"You were supposed to come find me," Feliciano asked.
Ludwig frowned, what did he mean?
"You were supposed to keep me safe. You always found me when I needed you the most. Where are you now? Where are you Ludwig?"
Feliciano's smile was gone and he looked at Ludwig with such a betrayed and heartbroken look that Ludwig found he had no excuses.
"I trusted you."
Red started to spread through Feliciano's shirt, starting from his heart and spreading out and down. Ludwig's eyes widened as he rushed forward, unable to reach the Italian before he fell to the ground.
Ludwig fell to his knees beside the younger man but was unable to grab him, his arms passing straight through. He tried to call out but of course no sound came and he watched with pained horror as Feliciano's eyes closed and his chest slowly stilled. Coughing, he soon realized that they were surrounded by smoke but there was no fire to speak of.
Ludwig woke gagging and coughing and gasping for air.
Gilbert was by his side in a minute. "Hey Ludwig, you okay?" he asked.
Ludwig nodded, the moon light enough for Gilbert to see the motion. He started to sign to his brother but Gilbert told him to hold a moment before digging a flash light out of his bag and pointing the beam at his brother. Ludwig flinched slightly at the light and let his eyes focused before repeating what he had started to say before.
"I can't sleep, so why don't you get some rest and take the first watch?"
Gilbert frowned but nodded. "Alright."
They switched places and Ludwig dug around in his bag for a bit before finding what he was looking for at the bottom beneath a couple rolls of bandages and a bottle of water.
Pulling the white flag from the confines of his bag, he unrolled it and fingered the fabric. Feliciano had made it for him as a sort of gift when they had first started this journey, but Ludwig had put it in his bag and forgotten about it, never really having a use for it as Feli seemed to, but now, he was glad he had it. It was a connection of sorts to his lost friend, an unspoken promise that everything was alright, a symbol not of surrender, but of hope that, somewhere, a young man from Italy was hiding, alone and scared, clinging to his own white flag, believing that Ludwig would come and rescue him. It was a symbol of the hope that he was right.
When still they couldn't find Feliciano the next day, Gilbert stated that they had to move on.
Once again Ludwig refused.
"No. He could be bleeding out somewhere. Shot and dying, lost and afraid. I'm not just going to leave him!"
Gilbert was quickly growing tired of Ludwig's stubbornness. "We've searched everywhere Ludwig," he snapped. "I already said yesterday that the odds are that he's moved on and the more we search and the more we don't find him, the more likely that option is becoming. And I swear to God Ludwig if you don't come with me, I will knock you out and carry you out of here myself."
Ludwig growled, knowing very well that Gilbert would do absolutely that and even though he was taller and stronger, Gilbert would end up winning in the end if Ludwig fought back.
"Fine," he signed sharply.
Gilbert nodded and they headed through the trees back onto the main road and walked for hours in angry silence.
By the time they set up camp that night, the anger had dissipated and after staring into the fire for several minutes, each lost in their own thoughts, Gilbert decided to speak.
"What are your feelings with Feli anyways?" He didn't look at his brother as he asked the question, keeping his focus on the fire that flickered at his feet, but he could still sense his brother's shock at the inquiry.
It was a long moment before Ludwig shrugged and Gilbert finally turned to watch his hands.
"I don't know. I know he is very special to me. I want… I need to protect him. He's a bright light in a world of shadows and someone like that doesn't deserve to be in a place as black as this. I want to get him somewhere safe, where I can see him smile all the time."
Gilbert smiled and picked up the stick he had beside him and poked at the fire. "So you love him."
Ludwig sputtered slightly at the accusation as Gilbert dropped the stick again.
"I…. I don't know," he signed, his answer resigned as he found he couldn't outright deny it. "Besides, now is hardly the time for such things."
Gilbert shook his head. "On the contrary, this might be the best time. You have to take it while you have it Lud. You never know when it'll be lost. If you wait for all of this to be over, it might be too late."
"You're being disturbingly wise," Ludwig replied, causing Gilbert to chuckle. "Besides, I refuse to discuss such morbid things at a time like this."
"Fine, fine, well you should get some rest, I'll take first watch tonight," Gilbert said standing and kicking dirt on the fire to get the bigger flames before stomping the rest of it out.
Ludwig nodded and soon he was on his back, once again staring at the sky.
"Good night Lud, I love you," Gilbert said, settling down for the watch, letting them fall into silence as they waited for morning to dawn again.