I never thought the word "weeny" would change my high school life.

Cory and I ended up the newspaper room alone. I think we started out looking for Eric. We found him in the journalism room with the editor in chief, who was one of his little flings. Our presents seem to have angered her which caused her run out. Eric called us rats and went after her. We laughed it off until we took a look at the computer…then we laughed some more.

The front page story was about Feeny becoming the principal and the headline read:

The New Principal is Feeny

"A page full of Feen…won't that scar little kids" Cory joked.

We laughed and started playing around with the keyboard.

"Oh what if it was Teeny?"

"No Denny?"

"No what about Beeny?"

Then my finger pressed the W.

"Weeny" we chuckled at the same time.

"Imagine 2000 students reading that."

This rebel blood started rushing to my hand. I felt this feeling of wanting stick it to the man. I want to show them. Most of all I wanted something I didn't have a lot of in my childhood.

"Power, Power" I command.

"Shawnie power like that can be really bad in the wrong hands." Cory reached over me and changed it back. "Come on" he left leaving me alone.

"Yup that's right, wrong hands." I whispered to myself. I knew I should have gotten up, but I couldn't. Something else I didn't have a lot of in my childhood was a lot of choices. Now I was given a choice to walk away or to cause trouble. The nagging grew more and more as I sat there. Let my mind, my heart, and my knowing of right and wrong sip away. I pressed the letter W then the word send.

%%%%%

The next day everybody at school was laughing at the headline. I was felt as if I was on this high. I felt I was bouncing off the walls. Seeing everybody admiring what I did, even Harley praised it.

I heard him smirked, "The guy that cooked up something like this is the kind of guy I want to hang with"

I laughed and walked up to him feeling full of myself. "Hey Harley you know that guy who did that…it's me."

"You? really?" he smirked again.

"Yea I did it" I said stepping into his space that high going straight to my head. I then whispered "I'm not a faggot now. Am I?"

He chuckled and got into my face. "Frist of all, one stupid headline is nothing compared to Eddie's work. Second of all I'm now thinkin you used the word weeny cause you wantna sick some."

My mouth dropped. All I could think was Damn you. Damn you Shawn. Why did you have to bring it up? What is wrong with you?

While I stood there trying to think of a comeback when Cory grabbed me by the arm.

"Have you gone fairer than I've ever imagine." He shouted at me.

"Cor you don't understand…"

"How could you do this? Do you realize how much trouble you'll be in with Feeny?"

I forget about that. I forget about the trouble I would get into.

%%%%%

"Today is our discussion on the Scarlet Letter. Which I hope all of you had at least started." Turner said he wrote the letter A on the chalkboard. "See Hester Prime…"

I was half listening. My mind was too focused on what I did. I knew I was doing something bad, but it felt so good doing it. It was wrong but it felt right. The thing that I hated the most was that I was given a choice to do the right thing but I didn't. Then I heard something that caught my attention.

"See the puritans had very strict laws because they believed that people by nature were evil and easily tempted."

"What?" I yelled out my eyes completely opened.

Turner walked over to my desk "Yea, the puritans believed that in their natural world humans would make bad choices, which is why they thought it was god's job to punish them."

He stared at me, "So Hunter what you did think about The Scarlet letter?" he asked me. He looked like he was really interested in what I had to say. The truth is that I had read the book. The truth is that there a lot of things I wanted to say about it.

The Scarlet Letter shows how that the puritans were a bunch of hypocrites that claim to have left England for freedom yet they become the most judgmental society themselves?

The Scarlet Letter shows how strong and bold a woman can be, not being scared into selling out others?

The Scarlet Letter show the battle of Hester's outside conflict versus the Rev.'s inner conflict, questioning what is worse public shame or private guilt?

But I acted dumb; I always acted dumb in class. I was supposed to be the shallow minded trailer trash so instead I said "It's about some chick that gets knocked up."

Turner looked at me disappointed.

%%%%%%

It turns out the janitor saw me. Fenny gave me dentition for like a mouth. However there was a bright side. When I got out of Feeny's office I was marked as the hot bad boy. Every other guy seemed to want to be my friend. Every other girl…oh the girls…between my looks and my new found rep every other girl wanted to date me. Wanting to gain back that high and wanting to fix myself, I went along with it.

Cory didn't want to walk with me that day, he said that we were okay, but he had to go talk to Topanga. I walked home trying to convince myself that this was the real me, a bad boy ladies man.

"I'm hot rebel who wants babes." I repeat to myself to until I got home.

Then I opened my trailer door to see something I very rarely saw…my sister. Stacy was wearing her pink waitress uniform with a stained apron. She sat on our couch in a shower cap smoking a cigarette. It was easy to forget that she was only a little older than Eric.

"Hey Stacy, what's you doing?"

"I wanted to die my hair in peace." She said pointing to the shower cap, "I figured Daddy wouldn't be home, so they myself in."

"It's okay with me." I dropped my bag and sat next to her "So how's the family?"

"Well I got a baby and a toddler crying all the time and my deadbeat husband can hardly keep a job. I'm working gave yard shifts… " She took a puff, "Are you really going to let me go on?"

"Well Stacy, I'm curious how you are doing. I don't get to talk to you a lot."

She took a puff "yea I guess that's true." She smiled "So…what's going…at school? You'll still in school right?"

I smiled too, "yea, um…we are reading The Scarlet Letter…do you remember that book?"

She stared into space for a second, "Is that the one about the chick that gets knocked up and everybody calls her a slut?"

I nodded "Yea, I guess that's pretty much the main idea"

She laughed "been here"

"Hey Stacy…do you believe people are evil by nature?"

She slowly turned to me "I don't know…" then she smirked "I know marriage is evil."

I always heard Stacy and her high school boyfriend turned husband yelling at each other. They seemed to have an abusive relationship, yet I would still see them making out in his pick up truck. That's when a question popped into my head. "Hey I know this maybe a creepy question but…if you hate him then how do you…kiss him and stuff."

She took another puff, "I picture George Cooney."

I was confused, "What?"

"When I kiss by husband I picture that I'm kissing George Cooney, or Mario Lopez, or one of the cute bus boys at the dinner."

"Does it work?"

"Yea…makes it much easier to fake it." She laughed until the timer went off, "I have to go wash this out." She said getting up.

After about ten minutes, she came back in the living room with bleach blonde hair.

"I had a nice time talking to you, Sis. And that's a good color on you." I said sweetly.

She gave me a small smile and left.

I sat alone and thought about Turner's class. I got out my black notebook.

In my natural world

I'm criminal

I'm trouble

I'm sin

I cannot resist the thrill of temptation

I want to lie, cheat, and steal

My mind knows better

But my own nature doesn't