Chapter 10

Elena listened half-heartedly as Caroline chattered on about school and Tyler and the upcoming dance. She heard the door to the boarding house open and footsteps approaching. Caroline had heard it, too, and her friend turned toward the door. "Bonnie, that was fast . . ." Caroline stopped talking abruptly as two people who were very clearly not Bonnie and Jeremy entered the room.

"That one is Elena Gilbert." The man pointed at Elena.

"Hey, that's my friend you're pointing at," Caroline stepped in front of Elena only to be flung out of the way. She hit the wall hard but popped right back to her feet, her face vamping out.

"A baby vamp. How cute." The woman faced off with Caroline, her own face changing.

Elena was left facing the man, and she backed away, putting the kitchen island between herself and the strange vampire approaching her. She felt around frantically for any kind of a weapon, but her fingers found only a small knife that she knew wouldn't even faze a vampire. She picked it up anyway, feeling better with some sort of weapon in her hand. The man smiled at her. "That won't help you, sweetheart. Don't worry. I'm not here to kill you, but you're coming with us."

Elena could see in her peripheral vision that the woman had shoved Caroline against the wall, hand at her friend's throat. There was really only one thing Elena could do. "Damon!" she screamed as loud as she could, praying that he would hear even if he was still in the shower. Unfortunately, his room was at the far end of the house from the kitchen, which was probably why he hadn't heard the commotion already.

The vampire in front of her hesitated a moment at that, an expression that could have been fear crossing his face. Then he was on Elena, shoving her hard against the counter and twisting her hands behind her. The knife fell from her fingers.

Just as suddenly as the vampire had grabbed Elena, however, he was gone, his body flying across the room and into the wall so hard that the wood paneling gave way. Damon stood between her and the vampire that had attacked her. Damon's black hair was soaking wet, and he had apparently been in the middle of getting dressed. He was wearing both pants and a shirt, but his feet were bare. Mostly, though, Elena noticed the cold fury and raw power that radiated from him. She was suddenly glad she couldn't see his eyes.

Damon was on the other vampire before he could even get up, his fist hitting the man with inhuman speed. He straddled the other man, keeping him pinned to the ground. After a couple of blows, Damon paused with his right hand in the air. "How dare you come into my home and attack Elena," he snarled.

Elena felt a chill at the tone of his voice. All traces of the man who had been playfully teasing and kissing her in almost that exact spot just minutes before seemed to be gone. Damon was all predator at the moment. She started to say something to pull him back, but before she could get a word out, Damon had plunged his hand into the other vampire's chest, pulling his heart out.

Elena couldn't stop herself from gasping in horror. Damon had just killed the man – a vampire, a small voice in her head reminded her – with his bare hands, right in front of her.

Damon was on his feet without a moment's hesitation. He stalked toward where Caroline had taken advantage of the surprise of Damon's appearance to get the upper hand on the other woman. "I'll take it from here, Caroline." His voice was still a growl. He shoved the woman against the wall, holding her by the neck as she had held Caroline just moments ago. The female vampire clutched uselessly at Damon's arm. "What do you want with Elena?" Damon asked coldly.

"Look, it's nothing personal," the woman gasped out. "Just a job, okay."

"Who hired you?" Damon caught the woman's hand and snapped a finger.

"This warlock, okay. I don't even know his name."

Damon snapped her wrist, and the woman screamed. "I don't know anything, I swear. Look, just let me go and you'll never see me again."

Damon cocked his head at her. "Why do I not believe you? Maybe I should start removing body parts. I'm not sure you're bright enough to need an opposable thumb." He paused for a breath before continuing as if an idea had come to him. "Or I could take your eyes. Have you ever had your eyes gouged out? It's rather painful."

Elena found her voice. "Damon, don't do this," she whispered. She had caught a glimpse of his eyes as he had crossed the room, and she felt a chill run through her. She couldn't believe that he was torturing the woman and threatening far worse. How could he even think such things?

"Sorry, Elena. She came after you. If you don't want to see this, you might want to leave the room." Damon didn't look away from the vampire that he held against the wall. "Well, start talking."

The vampire was trembling slightly, and her voice was shaky with fear. "I swear I don't know anything. We got the job because we were in the area. This warlock has hired other vampires before, but I had never met him. He just wanted us to grab the girl."

Damon's eyes bored right into those of the other vampire. "Hmm, I suppose I might actually believe you. But the problem is that if you don't have any useful information to share, there's no reason to keep you alive. Now would you rather lose your head or your heart?" he asked her coldly.

"Damon," Elena began softly, not sure what she could even say to this version of Damon. This was hardly the man that she loved, and she didn't know how to bring him back.

Caroline was looking worriedly between Damon and Elena. "Do you at least want a stake, Damon?" she asked. "I can break a chair or something."

"No need to damage the furniture, Caroline. I'm particularly fond of removing hearts, actually." He smiled as he released the woman's throat and, in one smooth motion, tore her heart from her chest as she tried to run.

Elena screamed. She stood frozen for a second, unable to believe what she had just seen. Damon had killed two people – two vampires that voice repeated, although she wasn't sure if it mattered, if it should matter – with his bare hands, one a woman who was terrified and begging for mercy. With a sob, she turned and fled the room.

•••••

Caroline watched worriedly as Elena fled. She glanced back at Damon, who just stood there, staring down at the body of the female vampire. Her heart was still clenched in his hand, and Caroline watched as he opened his fist and the bloody heart dropped onto the woman's body with a plopping sound. For once in her life, Caroline was at a loss for words.

Damon apparently wasn't. "Help me move these bodies into the living room. We can burn them in the big fireplace." He sounded remarkably calm, like he did this all the time, and that calmness seemed entirely out of place to Caroline.

"Shouldn't you go talk to Elena?" she asked. "She's upset."

Now Damon finally looked up, ice blue eyes meeting hers. Caroline couldn't tell what he was thinking. "I think it's better if we both take a few minutes to calm down first," he said. He moved to pick up the woman's shoulders and gestured for Caroline to take the feet. "Come on. Chop, chop."

They began to work silently to move the body of the dead vampire, and Caroline slowly tried to get up her courage to ask Damon a question that his earlier words had raised in her mind. Finally, she just blurted it out. "Damon, have you had your eyes gouged out?"

"Yeah," he answered without meeting her eyes. He seemed to sense that she wanted to hear more, but he just added. "It . . . sucked."

Caroline bit back the questions on the tip of her tongue. It might be a bad time to push Damon, she decided, and they moved the first body without another word and moved on to the second. It was midway through moving the second vampire that Caroline saw Damon begin to deflate, as though the fight and the power had gone out of him. It was disturbing to see because it was so unlike Damon to lose energy like that, and Caroline remembered that it had been less than an hour since Damon had been asleep, knocked out by his exertions in rescuing Elena from being held prisoner in another dimension. She wondered suddenly where Damon had found the strength to kill two vampires. She watched as he sank almost bonelessly onto a couch. He was staring into the fire, watching another vampire burn. "I'll get you some blood," Caroline said, and Damon nodded tiredly.

Caroline buzzed into the kitchen, returning a minute later with a glass of warm blood. Damon was still sitting on the couch, staring straight ahead. Worried, Caroline handed him the blood and watched as he drank it slowly. Caroline couldn't stand the silence, so she said the first thing that popped into her heard. "At least vampire bodies don't smell like burning flesh." Damon just turned to her and raised his eyebrows, and she wanted to kick herself for making such as inane comment. She tried again. "You need to talk to Elena," she reminded him.

Damon just nodded, and Caroline couldn't read his expression at all as he stood up and headed for the stairs, leaving her alone in his living room.

•••••

Elena fled up the stairs, unable to stay in a kitchen that stank of blood. She closed her eyes and covered her face with her hands. The image of Damon with a bloody heart in his hand and that utterly cold look in his eyes was burned into the back of her eyelids. Trying to forget that image, she opened her eyes, only to realize that she had sought sanctuary in Damon's bedroom. "Fuck," she whispered as she sat down shakily on the bed where she and Damon had shared so many hours of intimacy. She had just seen the killer in him first hand, seen him torture without the slightest hesitation, and her visceral reaction was absolute horror. How could that have been the same man that she loved, the man who was so tender and playful and funny? She realized that she had truly believed that he had left that killer behind, that in regaining his humanity he had changed so much that the killer was no longer there. Or at least not so close to the surface. Because it had certainly looked like it had been easy for Damon to kill that way.

Elena had expected Damon to be right behind her when she left the room, so she was surprised that everything remained silent, that she was still alone. It was better this way, she thought. She could try to figure out why she had reacted this way before talking to him. Damon had told her that he would always be a vampire, that he couldn't change his fundamental nature, but she knew that he had changed so much. And she knew – she knew – that he could control his bloodlust and his vampire instincts. She expected better of him now, she thought, and she felt like he had let her down somehow. Elena realized that she had convinced herself that Damon had changed completely, and now, she wasn't so sure. Could she really, truly love someone with a killer lurking inside? And if she did love him – and she was afraid that she did, with all her heart – was that enough? Could she still be with someone who would torture and kill without a moment's hesitation? Didn't there have to be a line somewhere? Weren't they supposed to be the good guys, after all?

So Elena sat on the bed, her thoughts whirring in circles, until she heard soft footsteps outside and Damon walked through the door. She looked up at him through tears, and his face looked impassive. Elena hadn't planned the words that came out of her mouth, and part of her was horrified that she practically screamed at him. "Don't you fucking care?"

Damon flinched. "Elena," he began, but she cut him off.

Elena stood up, anger swamping her. It was partly anger at him and partly irrational anger at herself. "How could you kill like that? How could you torture and kill someone begging you for mercy? Was that easy for you?"

His voice had gone cold. "I'm a vampire, Elena."

She wasn't sure if he was going to continue, but she jumped right back in. "That's always your excuse, isn't it? That doesn't mean you have to be a killer, Damon."

Now his ice blue eyes flashed angrily, and she saw that his fists were clenched as he struggled for control. "Yes, it does." He ground out the words. "Damn it, Elena. You're right – I don't care. Not about those other vampires. It's kill or be killed. Those two would have taken you right back to the warlock that we just got you away from."

"You had won, Damon. You didn't have to kill her. She would have just left," Elena countered.

Damon snarled. "And ran right back to the warlock that hired her. Or she would have gone to other vampires and told them that I couldn't protect you." His blue eyes captured hers, boring into them with overwhelming intensity. "I will do anything for you, Elena. Anything."

Elena sighed. She turned away, unable to look into those eyes any longer. "Maybe that's the problem, Damon. There are lines. There have to be."

Damon closed the gap between them, although he didn't touch her. She could see him holding himself back, his body almost rigid. His expression had softened, although his eyes still burned. "I'm sorry, Elena," he said. "I wish more than anything that you didn't have to live in this world, in my world. That you could just be a normal teenager worrying about school dances and shopping." He paused, and his eyes had a suspicious shine to them now. "But I can't give you that. I can only try to keep you alive, the only way I know how. And I can't apologize for that. I am who I am, Elena."

"Damon," she began and then stopped. She had no idea what to say to that.

Just then, Damon cocked his head to the side, listening to something that she couldn't hear. It had become a familiar gesture, but it was also one that in that moment reminded her that he wasn't human. And he never would be again. "Jeremy and Bonnie are here," he said. He gave her one more searching look and turned away. He still hadn't touched her. "I'll be downstairs."

Elena nodded, still at a loss for words. Damon was already out the door by the time she spoke. "I'll be down in a minute," she said shakily.

A/N: I know, I know - don't hate me too much for making them fight! I hope Elena doesn't seem too OOC in this chapter. I was disappointed that the show didn't have her react at all when Stefan killed Brady via heart removal right in front of her (which of course never happened in this story). I thought that was a real missed opportunity to explore the ethics of dating a vampire, so I'm playing with a different reaction from Elena here. And we can't have things be too easy for Damon and Elena since I don't think things are ever going to be easy for those two. But I'm curious to know what you think so please review and let me know.