She let him go on worrying about her over the next few weeks that somehow turned into months. He let her continue to say nothing was wrong, not that he bothered to hide the fact that he didn't believe her. They didn't see each other outside of work-not that that says much, they were both workaholics and practically lived in the hospital-unless bumping into each other at the Jumbo Mart or Ike's counted. Still, the rumor mill was full of buzz about the pair of surgeons.

Another attending involved with one of his residents, but weren't they so well suited for each other? She needed someone to look out for her and he wanted someone to care for. Older man, younger woman-so cliché but it works. Those were just some of the things people were saying about them. Neela didn't know if Lucien was aware of the gossip or if he simply didn't care. She chose an air of indifference herself, none of what they were talking about was even true. Or was it?

If anyone had asked her directly about Lucien Dubenko, she'd have denied any sort of attraction on her part. It was absurd. He was her attending, her mentor…her friend. He was kind, understanding, encouraging…and patient. Sweet, funny and a little odd. And she liked spending time with him. He confused her. Or maybe she confused herself. Neela didn't know any more, but she did know that when she was with Lucien she felt, if not happy, then at least not sad.

Ever since Michael had gone back to Iraq, Lucien had been there. He offered her distractions at work, kept her busy. Talked her into accepting a place in his department. After the funeral, he'd offered condolences and then continued with the diversions. Put her, an intern, on his new transplant team. Encouraged her talents and skills. He kept his thoughts about Gates to himself, never let Crenshaw harass her too much about the ER doctor.

Dubenko even clumsily tried to apologize for his crush on her, his drunken pass at Abby's wedding. His outburst at work about his feelings for her. She accepted his apologies, told him she was flattered and left it at that. Or so she thought. Then her accident put her in his care, at his mercy. Neela almost dying brought his feelings back to the fore for Dubenko. She'd watched him struggle with them, try to hide it in friendly concern. He seemed to have resigned himself to this balancing act of caring but not getting too close. He'd give her one of those smiles, a look and even once or twice there was a gentle meeting of their lips but he never spoke about his feelings. Not after that first outburst.

All of this was rolling around inside of Neela's head as she walked down the snow-lined, frozen Chicago sidewalk. She thought the cold air would help her think, put some order to the emotional chaos, help her make up her mind. She shouldn't have been surprised when she realized she was standing at his front walk. The brownstone walkup looked warm and inviting compared to the paved sidewalk she was standing on. He was home, she knew. His car was parked right there on the street. There were lights on here and there in the house. Smoke coming from the chimney.

She stood there for a few minutes, wondering what Lucien might be doing behind those brick walls. Then she resumed her walk. She wasn't ready to knock on the door and find out. Not yet.