I watched Bella's eyes fade and shut. She looked so peaceful. You would never have known that just moments ago she was in terrible pain. Her hand went limp in mine so I set it on her chest. A small amount of blood was still flowing from her but it was nothing to Carlisle. I was used to it sealed away under her skin but when it was in the air it still intoxicated me. Of course it wasn't bothering me now, not when the love of my life and possibly my child were in danger.

"Edward come help me prop her legs up. I need to get a look at her cervix."

I made my way to the end of the bed where Carlisle was already placing one of Bella's legs up into a metal sling. He pushed the ends up her dress up so that he could get the light in place. I watched as he felt around inside her. His face never changed. He wore the same concentrated concerned look the whole time. If my heart was still beating I know it would have been racing. The fact that I had no idea what was going on was killing me. I paced around the small room while he continued his examination. When I heard him pull off his latex gloves I turned.

"No need to worry. Bella and the baby are fine."

I released the breath I hadn't known I was holding.

"Then where did all the blood come from?"

"Well I don't know what she was doing but it seems she tore one of her wounds."

I couldn't stop the flinch. Again this was my fault. All her pain was because of me. She wouldn't be laying there on the bed unconscious if I hadn't lost control. Why did I even take her to that house? Carlisle must have sensed my distress.

"Edward don't beat yourself up over this. You cant change the past. Bella doesn't seem to be blaming you at all for this. You should try to forget this and live for the future that you now have."

"Forget about it? How can I possibly forget that I raped her and tore her apart from the inside!"

"Edward dwelling on it isn't going to help anyone. Your just going to hurt yourself and possibly Bella if continue to feel like this. She wouldn't be here if she hadn't forgiven you."

I didn't speak. I just stared at Bella. She was so beautiful. Even in pain I was marveled by her face. I couldn't imagine my life without her in it. The fact that she didn't demand to never see me again after what I had done was amazing. When I saw her body on the floor that night, so small, I couldn't believe what I had done. Her body was covered in bruises. She looked dead. I tried to pick her up but my body wouldn't let me. I remember finding my way outside and remaining there until she found me. Why she still loves me, I'll never know. What woman would come back to a man that raped her and nearly killed her?

A half an hour passed before Bella began to stir. Her eyes fluttered and her fingers twitched. I sat next to her, watcher her every movement. Carlisle had cleaned her up and had Alice quickly redress her in something that wasn't covered in blood. When she finally seemed awake a smile graced her perfect lips. Her eyes locked with mine. I couldn't help but smile in return.

"Are we okay?"

I knew she was referring to herself and our son.

"Yes love. Your both fine."

"What was wrong?" Her voice sounded weak.

"You just tore open some wounds."

I looked away from her. Her small warm hand wrapped around my face and made me look at her.

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"You know what Edward."

"Love I really don't…"

"Stop hating your self. I'm sick of it. I don't blame you and you shouldn't either."

"Bella…"

"No. Please just be happy with me. We have so much more to be happy about than we do to be sad. We're alive, we're together, and we have a baby boy on the way."

I couldn't stop the smile that came. Even though I had never said anything, I was beyond joyous that we were having a child. I spent my whole life thinking that I would never have a child. I would never be father. Now here I was with the love of my life and she was carrying my son. My son. What an amazing thought.

"Bella dear have you thought of any names?"

She smiled. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

"Well I had a few thoughts but I don't want to say."

"Why not?"

"Well I think that when I see him for the first time the name that's right will just come to me you know?"

"So what your saying is that I don't get to have a say in the name of my son?"

As I laughed she poked her bottom lip out in an attempt to be cute. I must say that I worked perfectly.

"If that's what you think will happen then I trust you."

She sat up and reached out for me. I hugged her tight before she pulled away. She traced her fingers around my face. They trailed down my neck and I shivered. She could do such amazing things to me without even knowing it. I knew she didn't know what she was doing to me. She seemed to be thinking. Her hand made its way down my chest. I tried to keep myself calm while her hand went back up. Bella smiled at me. She must have noticed.

"Want to go home?"

I just nodded.

She wiggled her way off the bed and onto my lap.

"Dear Edward, what is wrong?"

Her teasing was very attractive.

"Bella, as much as I want to play along I think we should wait."

She stiffened but relaxed almost as fast.

"I know, sometimes I just don't think."

I stroked her hair.

"Save this for another time love, right now you need rest."

I lifted her up into my arms and walked out of the room. No one seemed to be home. I couldn't hear a sound any where in the house. I gently placed her into the Volvo and quickly got into the other side. All I wanted was to get her home and into bed safely. She had made it very clear that she wanted to do things for herself but after today I hoped that she would be a little more willing to let me care for her. It was the least I could do for her since it was my fault she was in the shape she was in.

When we got home I laid her in the bed and went to get something to eat. I quickly threw together a small plate of fruit. Her eyes lit up when I returned. Obviously I had picked the right thing. She eagerly ate while I changed clothes. I felt her eyes on me and smiled. She finished the plate in a matter of minutes and placed it on the bed side table. I joined her in bed and sat quietly."I wont be doing a lot on my own now will I?"

"I would rather you didn't."

"Well I don't think I'm going to argue with you."

The shock must have been obvious on my face.

"That's…grand love."

She smiled and closed her eyes. I knew she was asleep before the small snore escaped her lips. She was so beautiful while she slept. I wondered what she was dreaming about. It had been so long since I dreamed that I couldn't quite remember what it was like. I wondered if she would miss it. Did I miss it?