Chapter 10

West Residence
Los Angeles, CA

Ruby stood just in front of the door and watched Shay sitting on the porch swing looking out at the road that went in front of the house. The several porch lights were on and illuminated the General's weary face. She wrapped her arms around herself and took the few steps forward to reach the end of the swing to have a seat beside him. The raven haired beauty looked out at the road too to watch the passing night traffic.

They sat there in silence for a few moments that felt like it stretched to minutes to Ruby. The silence between them was broken when Shay whispered as he continued to look out, "It's been a long day. It's felt more like a week."

"It's been a busy day for everyone, but a good one," she replied with a small smile.

Shay turned his head to look at her with furled eyebrows. "You said I messed up your night."

Ruby shifted in her seat to turn to face him with her resting her left arm on the back of the swing. She pulled the end of her dress over to cover her crossed legs (more to keep them warm then modesty of Shay taking a peak) and then faced him with a hopeful smile. "I'm sorry. I was wrong with what I said in the car about you messing up anything." She took a quick breath and continued in a somber tone, "I was just… shocked at what happened at dinner and you just got up to leave. I was expecting a nice night out on the town with my friend instead of sitting out on a porch swing trying to cheer up said friend."

Shay snorted out a laugh and countered, "Don't turn this around on me; this was suppose to be your night. If the night turned out the way I wanted it, you would have spent it out with him and I'd be kicking back in a nice hotel room."

Ruby lifted her left hand up to hold the side of her leaning head as she replied, "Yes, but you feel guilty now for doing what you have always done: look out for me."

Shay broke into a small smile before replying, "I just want you to be happy, but I didn't want to see you get hurt again. I watched it with Glenn and I watched it with Roy, but I could see it coming this time and I could at least warn you."

"Don't you mean stop me?"

Shay shook his head. "No, it's still your decision whether you want to see the guy. He's right about not knowing the entire story."

Ruby raised an eyebrow when asking, "You're defending him now?"

"No, just that I don't have the whole picture of what happened between them and a lot can happen over eighteen years to a person."

"There's nothing that could justify that if it's true," she replied in disbelief at what he was saying.

"If being the operable word, but I'm not talking about justification… just explanation enough to understand why he made his decision, but never justification."

Ruby took a deep breath and scooted closer to the General. "He's not you. You never abandoned your children, gone a lot, maybe even too long, but never abandoned them and Spencer hasn't been a child in twelve years."

He stared back at her and she recognized the look: that he didn't believe the words she was saying. "Please don't try to absolve me of my sins towards Carly."

She blinked at that statement and tried to speak as he looked to her daring her to challenge his words. She let out a slow breath and asked, "Why did you stay away so long? I could never figure out why; why you would be away from Carly for so long."

He whispered softly, "Carly asked me that same question back in September."

"What did you tell her?"

"I didn't want to hate her."

"Hate her? For what?"

He met her blue eyes and answered in a weary tone, "For Taylor dying, what if I had told Taylor no in wanting another child? You remember how hard it was on her for Spencer and when she carried Carly on top of beating the leukemia the first time. It was just… I never wanted to hate and resent her for some stupid what if. I could deal with her hating me, but not the other way around. I was too afraid of the possibility, so I stayed away, at least physically."

Ruby swallowed nervously and looked down for a moment before replying, "I… I asked her just after she got pregnant whether it was a good idea or not to have a baby. I know it had been a few years since the leukemia, but… I do remember how hard it was on Taylor with Spencer, probably more than you do and it worried me too, but what was done was done and she had to get through it. I remember you two were so happy when Carly was born. You wanted to hold on to that happiness?"

Shay nodded, unsure of what to say.

She asked, "What did Carly say?"

Shay laughed darkly before reply, "She forgave me. She told me she forgave me. Can you believe that?"

A corner of her mouth rose as she replied, "Of course I can, she's Taylor's daughter."

"It doesn't change anything. I still wasn't there for her. I was a selfish coward that put my feelings before my daughter's," he replied sternly when he saw her half smile.

She scooted even closer and rested her arm on his shoulder and chin on her arm. Their faces were barely inches apart when she whispered, "I saw a broken man that tried to make the best decision he could at the time even if it was the wrong one. You didn't do that out of malice and she doesn't hold it against you, so maybe you should stop holding it against yourself?"

Her warm breath tickled his nose, but he ignored it as he replied in a stern demeanor, "This Shay can't forgive."

"Taylor would tell you to forgive yourself and let go of your resentment of yourself. We can't change the past, but we have now to make the most of it just like you tried with me tonight. You never gave up on me and I'll be damned if I'm giving up on you Stevie." She then smirked as she finished, "No matter how stubborn you can be."

As much as he didn't want to smile, he couldn't help but return one with the look she was giving him. He hated that smug look she could give him, but at the same time loved it because of how alive it would show her with her eyes. "I'll think about it," he replied with a soft laugh.

Her grin turned into a smile at seeing his smile and replied, "You do that."

They both shared a soft laugh and she leaned forward to rest her forehead onto his forehead. They both let out a relaxing breath as they just watched each other for a few moments.

The front door opened and Spencer, Sam and Brad exited, but Spencer stopped in his tracks at seeing the pair in the porch swing. Sam asked nervously, "Ah, are we interrupting something?"

Ruby pulled back and looked with Shay at Spencer and the two teenagers. The adults looked to the trio with perplex looks on each of their faces. Shay was the first to speak, "Interrupting what?"

Sam was about to speak when Spencer croaked out, "Ah nothing, I'm going ahead and taking Sam and Brad back to the hotel."

"Okay," Shay replied with a nod then looked to Brad. "I expect you out of her room by midnight unless Carly or Freddie is there, understand young man?"

Brad nodded nervously, "Yes sir."

"Okay then have a safe trip back," Shay replied in an authoritative voice.

The trio then waved their goodbyes and headed for Spencer's rental car.

Shay looked to Ruby and asked, "What was that about?"

Ruby shook her head before replying, "Nothing, just teenagers being teenagers." Shay blinked and nodded unsure of what just happened. Ruby then shivered as she felt a breeze pass over the porch and she realized the bareness of her arms and shoulders. Shay smiled and sat up to take off his suit jacket. He then draped it over her shoulders and she pulled it tight around her before resting her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his right arm around her waist and pulled her close.

"Jacket warm?"

"Yes, it was worth every penny," she replied with a playful smile on her lips.

"I didn't get to ask, but how much do I owe you for the suit?"

"Nothing," she answered in a lighthearted tone.

"This suit didn't cost you nothing," he pointed out with a hint of sarcasm.

"Okay, with the tailoring, almost two grand."

Shay blinked and turned his head to look to her face. "Ruby Lyn West, how could you pay that much for a suit?"

She grinned as she snuggled her head into the crook of his neck. "Since you couldn't make everyone else feel underdressed in uniform, because blue is definitely your color, I still had to make sure you looked good and nothing but the best for my man."

He laughed for a moment before pressing his lips to her forehead. She smiled from the contact then feeling his cheek rest on the top of her head. They sat there in silent content as they watched the occasional passing traffic.

Carly and Sam's Room
Embassy Suites LAX North
9801 Airport Blvd
Los Angeles, CA

Sam was waiting for Brad to come back as he was changing into some sleepwear. She had thrown on some pajama bottom pants and a V-neck short sleeve sleeping shirt. Her nightshirt just hinted at her cleavage, but she wasn't exactly sure what she was hoping to accomplish with the shirt.

Her nerves were starting to get the best of her waiting for her boyfriend to come back. It didn't help her nerves any as during the drive to the hotel for some reason Spencer seemed eerily silent and maybe somewhat annoyed with her if his glances towards her during the ride were any indication. She couldn't figure out anything she had done to upset him. Her waiting was over when Brad stepped through the adjoining door to the rooms a few minutes later.

"Hey," he greeted her warmly, but she heard the nervousness in his voice.

"Hi," she replied with just as much nervousness in her voice. She started rubbing her hands up and down the side of her legs as she felt palms getting sweaty.

Brad let out an anxious laugh, "So, we finally get to talk."

Sam blinked and mouthed for a moment before asking surprised that he would be so straight forward, "Do you really want to talk?"

"You're my girlfriend; we have to talk about this,"

"Okay, right, sure," she mumbled out.

The taller teenager let out a nervous breath and scratched the back of his head. She wasn't sure or not if he did it on purpose, but she did notice that he directed a glance at her cleavage. She suddenly realized that maybe she shouldn't have worn the shirt, because even if he was sincere in wanting to talk about this with her, it didn't make him any less nervous about it. He finally apparently gathered his thoughts and started, "I guess I'll just come out and say it. I and my girlfriend, well, during the summer, about two years ago did—you know. We had been going out a few months and we thought we were ready and one day when my parents weren't home, we…"

The blonde was kind of surprise how hard this was for him to speak about it when everything else he had been so easy going talking about anything. Sam nodded. "Okay, so what happened?"

Brad shook his head. "I thought everything was fine between us afterwards. I couldn't really be happier and I know this might sound strange coming from a guy, but I thought it brought us closer together in our relationship. I was wrong. About a week later, things got weird between us, but I ignored it. It was the summer and things are different then during the school year so I chalked it up to that. I think she regretted it, but she wouldn't talk about it with me. When the school finally started she broke it off with me and giving me all these excuses: I'm too busy, I don't think we're compatible and some other reasons I don't remember."

"Do you regret it?"

"Being with her? No, just… I wish we could have worked it out and I know how messed up it sounds because we're together, but… I really loved her."

Sam looked down at the carpeted floor and asked softly, "Do you still love her?"

He shrugged a shoulder and gave her a half smile. "A part of me is always going to love. She was my first in many ways."

Sam nodded to that explanation as she processed it, but a question popped into her head and she asked, "What's her name?"

"No," he replied shaking his head.

"What?"

"No, I'm not answering that," he replied calmly.

"Why?"

"Because she's still going to Ridgeway and I don't want you to compare yourself to her," he replied defensively.

Sam's brows furled and she snapped, "Well I know you're comparing me to her."

"Not intentionally. The only comparison I'm making is to the relationship because I don't want to make the same mistakes twice. I don't want to mess this one up. You're not comparing me to other boyfriends you've had?"

Sam's breath hitched at the question. She had done the exact same thing she had just accused her of doing and every one of them had been a pale comparison to how he had treated her.

She cleared her throat and asked, "Do you want to with me?"

He sighed loudly before replying, "We've only been going out a month—"

"So you don't want to," she replied in a defeated tone that surprised even her.

"Don't put words in my mouth," he snapped back.

She met his gaze and was surprised in his response. Since they had been together, this was the first time he had raised his voice to her. She responded to anger the only why she was use to: she got angry herself, "You don't consider being with her one of those mistakes, so why do sound all hesitant of the idea of being with me?"

"Why do you just want to hop in the bed?"

"I don't want to hop in the bed with you," she hissed out.

"Then why are you so upset that I don't want to right now? If you don't want to now, what does it matter if I don't either?"

Sam swallowed down her retort as she realized she wasn't sure why she was upset. "I don't know."

Brad looked down and shook his head. "I don't understand. What are you concerned about?"

"I'm not concerned about anything," she replied defiantly.

"Is this about Carly and Freddie? Since you know they're…"

"Eh, gross no," she replied making a face and shaking her head.

"Then what is it?"

She shook her head. "Nothing."

"Don't close up on me Sam, please?"

Sam raised her hands. "No, you're right. It doesn't matter. You don't want to, I don't want to either so we're good.

Brad had his doubts meeting the shorter girl's eyes, but he replied, ever so hesitantly, "Okay… good."

"Good, fine, we're good," she replied nodding her head.

"So are we settled?"

"Yeah, we're fine," she waved him off.

"Okay, then do you want to order some room service? Get something to eat?"

Sam replied with a shrug of her shoulder. "I don't feel like eating."

Brad cleared his throat and looked away for a moment as he thought of what they could do to pass the time. "Okay… do you want to order a movie?"

Sam nodded her head then turned to walk over and sit in the center of her bed cross legged.

He went over to the nightstand to pick up the remote control and ordered a new comedy movie. He then took a seat on the bed with her and propped himself up with a pillow. He offered an arm for Sam to sit with him. He gave her a hopeful smile and she relented. She crawled up the bed and took a seat beside him with him wrapping an arm around her waist. She snuggled into his grip, but she could seem to get comfortable as her stomach churned. As the movie started, one thought did disturb her: He doesn't want to be with you, he wants to be with her. Every guy wants to be with another girl besides you.

West Residence
Los Angeles, CA

The night had finally winding down at the West Residence and the Hollywood Arts students made their goodbyes with promises to meet up later on tomorrow or Monday, leaving only Carly, Freddie and Beck at the home with Jade. Ruby and Shay had retired to the parlor as Freddie and Beck relaxed in the living room and Jade was showing off her room to Carly.

Carly laughed as she entered the dark colored room. "Black? Definitely your color," she giggled out.

"Funny Shay," Jade smirked as she shook her head. "I'm guessing yours is decorated in bright and beautiful colors. I'm guessing some pink," she shivered out the last word.

The brunette rolled her eyes as she gazed around the darkly decorated room as she walked around the room examining the decorations. There were various posters of musical groups, various candles and what struck her the most odd was the pinned butterfly collections sitting in frames. She found some of the morbid pictures quite humorous for some reason, until she stopped at one particular scary painting. It looked like it was a painting straight out of Hell. It chilled her for a moment at all the imagery and terrifying creatures populating the painting.

Carly blinked as she looked at the signature on the painting. She snapped around to look at Jade and commented in a surprise tone, "This says Dorfman."

Jade couldn't help but give her a grin. "Yes it does. Your mom gave it to my mom years ago. It's fantastic isn't it?"

"Ah… I'm just a little surprise that my mom would paint it," the brunette replied as she studied the painting.

"My mom was too she told me one time. She told me your mom put all her fears and what could scare her on it. She said it gave her power, making them do want she wanted through her paint brush. That's pretty deep if you ask me."

"Mom was very wise and her letter proves it," she replied in a sad tone.

Jade walked up behind her and wrapped her arms around her shoulders and across the top of her chest. She rested her chin on Carly's shoulder and whispered, "I'm sorry she's not here."

"Me too."

Jade held her comforting hug for a few more seconds before letting go and walking to take a seat on her bed. Carly walked over and took a seat in Jade's brown leather chair.

"Carls, I've been dying to ask you this, but how is it like to be married? Really?"

Carly gave her a small smile before reply, "Scary, but we have each other to be scared together."

"Scary? How is it scary? I thought it was suppose to be scary getting married, not being married."

Carly shrugged her shoulder. "We've been through a lot and there were so many missteps before we got here and we're still scared that something could happen to mess it all up. We're both afraid of losing each other."

Jade let out a breath and spoke reluctantly, "You said at lunch that you just didn't want to wait and didn't see the point in waiting, but… you're not sick are you Carls? Mom said you weren't, because she was scared, I mean she was really scared for a moment, when your dad called to tell us, but… I won't tell anyone if you are."

She shook her head. "No, I'm not sick and we're not going to live our lives afraid of that, everything else, but not that. We knew that we didn't want to live our lives apart and that it was it for me and him."

Jade nodded. "I glad. I wouldn't want to see you go through that."

"Thanks, I don't want to go through it either, but back to your question. It's also scary because we're not on our own anymore. We're in everything together and we're still trying to figure out how that works. It's not 'how will this affect me', but 'how will this affect us'. Planning your life together with another person is entirely different then just going it alone."

"I was wondering how you two really got together. I know he had always had a thing for you, but what made you finally get with him?"

Carly let out a tired breath and Jade realized that this was going to be a painful story instead of a happy one. "I finally broke his heart and realized I was breaking my own heart at the same time. I told him he had to move on and he took that to heart. He walked out of my life for only just more than a day and I realized that I couldn't live without him there… I couldn't function without him in my life. I was a mess the entire time. I wasn't in love with him yet, but I knew that I wanted to be with him. So this time instead of finally giving him a chance, he gave me a chance. I couldn't have been happier."

The raven haired teenager shook her head. "I can relate. I dumped Beck one time. I was being stupid and jealous of this other girl he was just friends with and it was the stupidest decision I ever made, but we got back together a few days later. I thought he had stopped loving me, but said he said 'who said I stopped?' And that was after he kissed me after trying to apologize."

Carly laughed, "Oh, this was the time you tried to get him a dog?"

Jade smirked and nodded her head. "Yes, that was the time."

The girls shared a laugh for a few moments before Jade asked, "What do you think happened tonight at dinner?"

"I don't know, but the way my dad sounded, he thinks he messed things up," Carly replied with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Maybe, but mom didn't think that was the case,"

Carly started laughing again.

Jade raised an eyebrow as she asked, "What's so funny?"

The brunette calmed down for a moment so she could reply, "The guy's trying to take the blame and the girl's disagreeing with him. That's funny."

Jade raised an eyebrow as she thought it over before joining her in laughter. "Wow, those two sure have it backwards."

Carly let out a joyful breath and stated, "It doesn't matter. They'll settle it and tell us tomorrow. I'm sure it's no big deal. Anyway, I know this might sound odd, but could you tell me about Cat?"

The two male teenagers were sitting on the couch drinking their individual sodas as they watched television. Freddie took a sip of his drink and asked, "So how long have you and Jade been dating?"

"This June will be four years," he replied with a smile.

"Wow… any tips?"

Beck laughed and threw his head back. He then looked back at the brown eye boy and asked, "You're asking me for tips? You're the one married."

Freddie laughed and replied, "Yeah, but we've been together eight months as a couple. Functioning as a couple is a lot different then when we were friends."

"I'm sorry man, but I don't know what to tell you. Jade and Carly are like night and day, but if you ever have anything specific come up, just call and I'll be happy to help."

"Thanks… listen about earlier today, I'm sorry about the pretty boy crack—"

Beck waved him off. "No, it's cool. Robbie can cross the line with Rex at times and Jade filled me in this afternoon about what's going on."

"About what?" Freddie asked with a raised eyebrow.

"The comments Carly's read off your site," Beck pointed out with a raised eyebrow.

Freddie's jaw dropped at he looked at the Canadian-Born. "She's read them?"

Beck gave a guilty expression. "I sorry man, I thought you knew."

Freddie palmed his forehead and leaned forward to look at the floor.

He patted the tech-producer's shoulder. "It's going to be okay. It's just a bunch of losers with too much free time on their hands in their pajamas."

Freddie shook his head. "Thanks, but I didn't want her to see them. They've said some things that…"

"That makes you want to take Robbie's head off today? He picked the wrong time to be making those kinds of jokes."

Freddie lifted his head and looked back at the other teenager. "Yeah, it does."

"Man, if it makes you feel any better, I'd be pissed too if anyone said something like that to Jade then Robbie used Rex to say something."

Freddie asked curiously, "So you don't humor him?"

The longer haired teenager shrugged a shoulder. "I do to a point, but I know Rex is just a puppet. He just uses it to say the things he's too afraid to say and we let him. After today, I don't think people are going to be as tolerant of what he does and trying to blame Rex."

Freddie nodded in satisfaction.

Beck grinned and looked back to Freddie. "Oh, and I think we're even too."

"Why do you say that?"

"You let me hug your wife and feel up her face without hitting me," he replied then started laughing.

Freddie chuckled with him and shook his head before sipping on his drink again.

Benson Residence
Los Angeles, CA

Leonard Benson was nursing a brandy with one hand as he held a phone to his other ear. He was looking out through his glass patio looking out to his pool as he was waiting for the other end of the telephone line to pick up. The other end finally picked up and started speaking, "Hey, Danny, this is Leonard. I know it's late, but I need a favor: I need you to find out everything you can about a Steven Shay. He's a general in the Air Force." Benson rolled his eyes as his old FBI buddy still working for the Bureau started complaining. "He's just a one star and doesn't sound like his job's all that important. I just need to know about him. Could you do that for me?"

Benson grinned as his friend complained for a moment, but easily relented and agreed to check out the General's background. He grinned as he ended the call and sipped his brandy.

Author's Note: I hope you all enjoyed this installment. See you on Friday.