For Now

I had seen Mrs. Jensen almost every school day since the beginning of first grade, more that seven hundred school days. A lot of those days I had spent more time in the same room with Mrs. Jensen than I had with my aunt. So I'd had plenty of time to form a clear opinion about her. And in my opinion, Mrs. Jensen was one of the best people in the whole school. I had never seen her lose her temper, and she always seemed fair and open-minded. Which makes sense, why would a narrow-minded person be a librarian?

And now Mrs. Jensen was standing in front of me, waiting. She wanted me to explain why a kid who got a bunch of Ds was exploring so many challenging subjects on the Internet.

One of the first things I learned at school was how to read a teacher's face. It's a school survival skill and all kids become experts at it. But as we stood there face-to-face in the library, me looking up, her looking down, I could not figure out what was going on behind Mrs. Jensen's greenish brown eyes.

So I started off cautiously. I said, "I like to read about a lot of things."

She smiled slightly. "I already know that much, Hiro. I want to know about your grades. It's perfectly clear to me that you are not a below-average student, or even an average student. Far from it. And you've been hiding that from me and everyone else at school." She paused with her head tilted as she figured out something else. Then she said, "And your aunt doesn't know how bright you are either, does she?" I shook my head. "So why have you been keeping this a secret?" she asked.

I told her the truth in the simplest way I could. I said, "I didn't want to be different all the time. I mean, I am different, and I know that. I just didn't want everyone else to treat me that way. Because it's not their business."

Mrs. Jensen nodded slowly. "I can understand that, I think. But why the low grades?"

I had to trust her. I had no choice. I said, "I did that on purpose. I'm trying to do something...about grades. Everyone makes way to big of a deal about them."

Mrs. Jensen's eyebrows scrunched together above her nose. She shook her head and said, "But why get Ds? How can that help?"

"Well," I said, "those Ds already have my teachers and my aunt and the principal thinking and talking about grades, right? And I hope they're going to think a lot more about grades. And tests, too. Because I've got sort of a...a plan." Then I looked her right in the eye and said, "Except if you tell on me, I don't think it will work."

No expression. "What are you trying to accomplish with this...plan?"

"Nothing bad," I said quickly. I almost started to tell about Liz, but I didn't. I didn't want anyone to think she was involved. So I said, "Most kids never talk about it, but a lot of the time bad grades make them feel dumb, and most of the time it's not true. And good grades can make other kids think they're better, and that's not true either. And then all the kids start competing and comparing. The smart kids feel smarter and better and get all stuck-up, and the regular kids feel stupid and like there's no way to ever catch up. And the people who are supposed to help kids, the parents and guardians and the teachers, they don't. They just add more pressure and keep making up more and more tests."

Mrs. Jensen's eyes flashed and she shook her head sharply. "But the teachers don't like all this testing either. And I was not happy when they made me start giving grades in library skills. That's not what the library is for. So don't think it's only the teachers. It's the school boards. And the state. And the federal government, too."

Then her pale cheeks colored, just a hint. Mrs. Jensen tried to hide it, but she was embarrassed by that outburst. She hadn't meant to show me what she was feeling.

But she had.

I pretended not to notice. I said, "Well, anyway, we have to have the tests and the grades, and of course the grades are going to be used to sort us into different levels in sixth grade, the smart kids and the dumb kids. And I don't like the way it's done and I want to try and change some things."

Mrs. Jensen said, "Isn't this dangerous? For you, I mean. Getting such bad grades?"

I said, "Maybe. But it's sort of like I have immunity. I'm smart, and I know I'm smart, and I know that when I have to prove I'm smart, I'll be able to. My grades won't matter so much, not like they do now for a lot of other kids. And even if I do get into some trouble, I don't care. I'm not doing this for fun. And I'm not doing this for myself." I paused, and then I said, "And I think I can do it without any help...at least, I hope so."

That was bait. And Mrs. Jensen knew I was fishing. And she went for the hook anyway.

"What sort of help do you think you might need?"

And I knew. I had been right about Mrs. Jensen. She was one of the good guys.

I smiled up into her face. "You'd do that? You'd help me?"

Mrs. Jensen said, "I didn't say that. But I can't see any school rules that you've broken. Your aunt would probably like to know that she's got a brilliant nephew living in her house, and I certainly think you should tell her. But that's between you and her." Her eyes searched my face. "I don't know if I could help you in any direct way. But there's nothing in my job description that requires me to report on every conversation I have with every student. So this can be between us. At least for now. Do you understand?"

I nodded. "Yes, and that's a big help...for now. Thanks, Mrs. Jensen."

She nodded and smiled at me, but just barely. Underneath that smile she was worried. I wasn't sure if she was worried for me or for herself.

Probably for both of us.

Review Replies:

firelass19 - YESSSS! I mean, NOOOOO! Hiro's secret is out! Lol, I've actually been waiting for this to happen for a while because it just excites me :P But then, I support Hiro and I don't think this was a step in his plan. But dat Hiro is thinking... I really want to see how he makes her sit in the corner with him XD - Well, you got what you wanted. His secret is out! XD

celrock - Wow, I sort of figured something might come about as a result of Hero's Internet activity, as I do recall him forgetting to log off of the computer the other day when attending that meeting with his teachers and aunt, but had no idea it would come down to this. I wonder what he's going to tell the librarian. Looking forward to the next chapter to find out! As always, keep up the great writing! - I hope you liked this chapter! Thanks! Keep reading!

Well, that's it for this chapter. I'm going to spend all night working on my Danny Phantom story Camp Scare but I can't promise a chapter on that because I like writing loooooooooooooong chapters for that one. But we'll see.

Thanks for reading!

Review!