pI could feel blood soaking into me from every direction- seeping up from the ground through the soles of my feet, showering down on me from the sky, and trickling in through my eye sockets every time I saw someone torn apart./p
pArmin was making this necessary. And for that, I hated him./p
pHowever, Armin was as powerless to resist his Mission as I was to resist mine. And for that, I pitied him./p
p"Reiner," I said softly; the military's forces had nearly been routed, each moment bringing humanity closer to complete subjugation at the hands of the titans. "Get ready."/p
p"Get ready for what?!" my friend demanded gruffly, and I winced./p
p"Reiner, I don't need the Soldier right now. I need the Warrior by my side."/p
pFor a moment he was blinking at me in confusion; I felt my heart twist. We were supposed to be in this together- at the very least, we were supposed to bear this burden together. But Reiner had created an escape for himself- a selfish escape that left me to struggle with the weight of the Mission alone. I needed him, the real Reiner, to stand at my side. The sad thing was, though, I couldn't tell which persona iwas/i the real Reiner anymore, nor could I begrudge him his coping mechanism./p
pI could only despair for myself./p
pThen my childhood friend was facing me, the old Warrior determination glinting in his eyes. "Get ready. Right. I am ready, Bertl."/p
pI felt my heart swell suddenly, my strength returning along with Reiner's conviction. I took momentary shelter atop a tall building, Reiner bounding up beside me, to survey our surroundings. The titans had overrun the military's forces; what was left of the Garrison was beating a hasty retreat, although there were pockets of Survey Corpsmen still fighting. I grimaced; they were so brave, such good men, and they would all die for it./p
pA sudden commotion from the top of Wall Rose drew my attention, and I felt my eyes widen in shock at what I saw. Annie- it was undoubted Annie, even at this distance -was engaging a strange, almost monkey-like titan atop the Wall. Annie wasn't supposed to be fighting in titan form, not once Jaeger was neutralized./p
p"What's going on...?" was all I could whisper. "What could possibly be going on?"/p
pAs I watched, the smaller titan seemed to dance around Annie, hopping first one way and then the other. Despite its impressive agility and speed, though, it was at a clear disadvantage, and soon Annie had it pinned down. I could just make out a number of smaller figures, humans, fleeing from the scene; they were too far away to identify, although I could see a smudge of gold leading the rest of them./p
p
i... Armin...?/i
/p
p"Where are you two headed?"/p
pI jumped, startled, at the voice behind us. The Ackerman girl had landed on the roof, as well- she, amid the carnage, didn't have a spot of blood on her skin or uniform./p
p"W-we're n-not..." I began, and then cursed my own stutter as the girl peered more closely at the both of us. iShe knows, she knows, she /iknowsi...!/i I whimpered silently, cursing Arlert for the hundredth time. iOh /iMariai she /iknowsi...!/i/p
pMikasa's eyes narrowed further. "Might I suggest we head toward Wall Rose? That seems to be where the survivors are trying to regroup."/p
pReiner glanced at me; I remembered a time when we had made decisions itogether/i, but nowadays he simply didn't have the presence of mind to give me any rational input. I hated how divided his heart had become; I missed having a real partner./p
p"Y-yeah..." I said finally. "Let's... let's do that."/p
pMikasa's gaze didn't waver, but after a moment she nodded. "Alright. Let's go."/p
pReiner followed me as I took off after the girl; I watched her back, debating whether or not I should try to attack her. Neither Reiner nor I had held back in the final exam, and Mikasa Ackerman had beaten us both; I wondered if either of us could take her on our own, and decided that the chances were low. iIf we were fighting a human /ias ia human,/i I added. iI doubt even /ishei could beat the Colossal Titan or the Armored Titan. I'm still exhausted from transforming earlier... but Reiner was planning to Shift anyway, to break down Wall Rose. If she tries to stop him then... as she inevitably will... then we'll have her./i/p
pThe Wall was rearing up in front of us quickly; I could see Reiner shooting me furtive glances, obviously waiting for me to give the signal. Annie had vanished again- presumably waiting, in relative safety, on the other side of the Wall. That was the plan: neutralize Jaeger, which had obviously already been accomplished, capture or kill Ackerman if possible, overwhelm the military with a stampede of Common Titans, and then Reiner would break down Wall Rose and send what was left of humanity spiraling into chaos and despair. After that, Armin Arlert and the Coordinate would have no choice but to side with us. That was the plan that Annie and I had come up with, and that was the plan that had to work./p
pBut something wasn't right./p
pWhy had Annie transformed to fight that strange, Dancing Titan? Why was Arlert still mobile, and with a group of people- probably the 104th -following him, no less? Why was Ackerman leading us itoward/i the Wall? I was more than a bit nervous about proceeding as planned with so many things seemingly out of place. Yet... what else could I do? For the good of the Mission, I had to put my faith in my comrades, in Annie and in Reiner, and proceed with the plan./p
pI wanted so desperately to go home. And we needed the Coordinate to go home./p
pI nodded to Reiner; instantly he had dropped back and to the side, arching casually into Mikasa's blind spot. He raised his hand to his mouth as I closed in on the girl, my blades sliding silently from their sheaths. I didn't want to kill her; it would make the Coordinate considerably less agreeable if we killed his adopted sister, and I hated unnecessary killing besides. However, I certainly didn't want her able to interfere, and it would be easy enough to knock her unconscious from behind. I put on a slight burst of speed, closing on her, bringing up the hilt of one blade.../p
pMikasa Ackerman spun in the air, a maneuver that would have been impossible for an ordinary human, one blade slicing neatly into my wrist. I heard Reiner give a shout of surprise, and heard my own voice raised in a startled cry of pain as my hand- and blade -went clattering into the alley below. I barely salvaged my landing, skittering to a halt on a passing rooftop./p
p"Bertholdt!" Reiner roared, as he curved back around; Mikasa had landed in front of me, her feet crossed neatly on the ridge of the roof./p
p"You didn't think it would be so easy, did you?" she asked coldly, pointing her blade at me. "Really, Colossal Titan- you didn't think it would be so easy, did you?"/p
pI faltered, taking a step backwards. I hated people like her; people who would belittle their opponent as they fought. No one wanted to fight- why couldn't she realize that? It was as though she was mocking my struggle- iour/i struggle to return home./p
p"I-I never thought that."/p
pMikasa huffed crossly, leaping out of the way as Reiner smashed into the spot she had been standing a moment before./p
p"Bertl, are you okay?!" he demanded, and I felt a rush of heat./p
p"Yeah, I-I'm fine." The bleeding had already stopped; I cradled the stump of my hand for a moment, wondering how long it would take to fully regenerate. iToo long.../i I thought crossly. iAt least it was only my left hand.../i/p
p"You won't be fine for long." Mikasa Ackerman's eyes glowed like a demon's as she leered at me calmly from her elevated perch. "Make your peace with the world while you can, because I'm going to kill you."/p
pI took another step backwards and glanced at Reiner. He nodded; he was ready. He raised his hand to his mouth, prepared to Shift./p
p"Bertholdt! Reiner!"/p
p"Mikasa! Mikasa, hold off!"/p
piArmin...! And Jean, and Marco... and Connie and Sasha...!/i I cursed violently; exchanged a glance with Reiner and hid my wounded hand inside my jacket as best I could./p
p"Bertholdt! You're okay!" There were tears in Sasha's eyes, and her joyous voice speared my heart. She plowed into me, her arms wrapping tightly around my midsection./p
p"Reiner, man!" Connie's relief was nearly as potent as he approached my friend. "I'm so glad you're alive! I never shoulda doubted you two, though!" I cursed again in the privacy of my own head, because I could see the Soldier struggling to reemerge./p
p"Mikasa." Armin's voice was calm; he glanced at me briefly, and I could tell that he wanted me within earshot. iFigure it out./i His eyes were a challenge. iI'm going to take you down. Figure out my plan, if you can./i "Take Connie and Sasha- they'll obey you. Go back with them and fetch Miss Rico; she should be regaining consciousness. I want you to evacuate what's left of the army."/p
p"What?!" Mikasa hissed, but a moment later her eyes softened. "Very well, Armin. I won't question you, as promised."/p
pArmin smiled sadly; pressed his forehead briefly to hers. "Come back alive..." I couldn't hear the words, but I read them on his lips. "Please, Mikasa... come back alive..."/p
p"Where's Eren?" the girl whispered./p
p"Safe," was all Armin replied. "We'll retrieve him after this is all over."/p
piAnnie must have won.../i I thought, taking a moment to be proud of my dear friend. iThe Coordinate is out of the fight. But Armin doesn't seem ruffled.../i/p
p"Connie! Sasha!" Armin called suddenly; I wondered why the members of the 104th responded so readily to his commands. "Follow Mikasa- obey her like you would obey me. You're going to meet up with Miss Rico again, and return to the main battle. Your goal is as follows: evacuate all surviving soldiers, from both the Garrison and the Survey Corps. Get them up the Wall, and then stay put. Jean, Marco, you're still with me, at least until I say to follow everyone else up the Wall."/p
p"Come on," Mikasa said, motioning to our classmates. "We've got to get moving if we expect anyone to be alive to rescue."/p
pSasha reluctantly pulled away from me; Connie split from Reiner, with a murmured order to survive the battle. I saw the Soldier rest one hand on our classmate's shoulder, then the Warrior pushed him gently off to join Sasha and Mikasa. I felt my throat tighten with emotion. Mikasa led the two of them off without further hesitation, and then I faced Armin- Jean was drifting toward me, seeming concerned about the spatters of blood seeping through my jacket. I wondered if we shout try to kill Jean and Marco now; when I glanced at Reiner, I was dismayed to find the Soldier still visible./p
p"Bertholdt."/p
pI looked nervously up at Armin; his eyes were cold./p
p"What happened to your hand?"/p
piJean... and Marco... he wants to out us to Jean and Marco... /iMariai, why is this so painful...?!/i/p
p"I-it's just a scratch."/p
pArmin took a single step forward; laid one hand on Jean's shoulder and held him gently back./p
p"Can we see?"/p
pI flinched. iWhy are you doing this? Why couldn't you have just sent them off with the others?!/i/p
pI already knew why. With Jean and Marco there, Reiner wouldn't be able to switch 100% back into his Warrior persona- darn close, perhaps, but not 100%./p
piBe grateful I sent Connie and Sasha away./i His eyes were liquid pain, and once again I was reminded that he loathed this as much as I did- resented what his plans were costing him. But he was willing to do what was necessary, and so to must I be./p
pSo I pulled out my hand./p
pJean let out a soft cry and recoiled instantly; Marco's reaction was less potent, and I guessed that the poor boy was in a mild state of shock. The stump of my wrist had already begun to heal, the flesh twisting slightly and beginning to steam as I allowed the healing to resume./p
p"I'm sorry, Jean; Marco." I had to say it- I ihad/i to, lest it choke me. "Run. Please, run away. I have no desire to see you hurt."/p
pJean's eyes were hardening; I flinched at the expression. "What the fuck is this, man?!" he demanded, taking a step forward. "Armin?! What the fuck does this mean?!"/p
p"Bertholdt is an enemy of humanity, Jean; Marco." Armin's voice was calm, his eyes locked on me. "He and Reiner have been plotting, with Annie, to bring the Walls down."/p
p"That's fucking hard to deny, man!" Jean said, pointing at my incriminating wound. "You can't tell us you're a igood/i titan, right?!"/p
p"What's to say that Armin and Eren aren't the ones who want to bring the Walls down?" I demanded. "Are you really going to trust them over your own-" iteammates?/i Tears sprang to my eyes. iTeammates... teammates...! Why can't I say it?!/i/p
p"I don't know who to trust anymore!" Jean admitted, his voice breaking. "I... I don't iknow/i! But Armin... he knew all this was going to happen! He knows what iwill/i happen if Trost falls!"/p
p"And what will happen if Trost falls, Jean?" Armin's words were whisper-soft; his eyes were dark./p
p"We'll... we'll be overrun..." the brunette continued softly, his hands clenching into fists. "And the survivors..." his voice suddenly rose to a shriek, "the survivors will be turned into titans!"/p
pI flinched back, my gaze jerking to Armin. iYou told them?! You told then about the /iApei?! /iThat'si how you're controlling them?!/i/p
p"That's right, Jean..." Armin murmured. "It's up to us to make sure that doesn't happen. I... won't let that happen. So lend me your strength, just briefly."/p
p"But against iBertholdt/i and iReiner/i?!" Marco keened suddenly. "You... you haven't given us any proof that they're our enemies, just... just that Bertholdt is a Shifter! Ymir was a Shifter, too, and she wasn't our enemy! She just wanted to live in peace!"/p
pI felt a violent shock of surprise race up my spine. iYmir... was a Shifter?!/i An image of the Dancing Titan and Annie flashed into my mind, and it suddenly made sense why she had transformed to fight the mysterious titan. iThat also means... that Ymir is dead./i My stomach lurched with sickness, but I tried to keep it off my face; I knew that Armin could tell anyway./p
p"I need proof!" Marco was still saying, and Jean looked as though he agreed./p
p"You've chosen a side, Bertholdt," Armin said softly. "None of us can move forward until you admit to it."/p
pI felt my whole body begin tremble- he was pushing and pushing and pushing, when I was already on the verge of collapse. I longed to pushed back, but I couldn't bring myself to; we were too similar, so similar that breaking him would be like breaking myself./p
p"Say it, Bertholdt. Just say it. It'll hurt less, that way."/p
p"..." My shaking was getting worse. I was afraid that my legs were about to give out, but somehow I managed to stay standing. My heart was pounding- no, pounding was the wrong word; my heart was spasming, palpitating, breaking into a million tiny pieces./p
p"Bertholdt, let's get out of here," Reiner called gruffly. "Don't pay attention to that little blonde kid."/p
pThe Warrior- my Warrior was back. I felt emotion choke me, and suddenly I felt just a bit stronger./p
p"Reiner, we can't... run from this."/p
pArmin's face split in a sudden grin. "Here we go. Let's end this, for both our sakes."/p
pI drew my blade; Reiner responded instantly, springing for Armin. The blonde ducked; Marco screamed and Jean drew his blades, although he looked less than certain about which side he was backing. Armin rolled in a controlled maneuver down the slope of the roof, then caught himself with one outstretched leg and darted to the side as Reiner crashed into the spot he had been a moment before. Then I was moving to intercept him. Annie hadn't wanted us to kill him, but what was necessary was necessary./p
pAnd I knew that he wouldn't begrudge me the act, just as I wouldn't hold my own death against him./p
pArmin swerved; he was moving quickly, but not as quickly as he had been at the beginning of the battle. I could see a wound seeping dark blood on his shoulder; I could see the exhaustion dimming his otherwise piercing gaze./p
pWe had him./p
pAnd then Jean was between us, his blades up and blocking mine just as I swiped for Armin Arlert's throat. The blonde slipped, surprised and obviously weary, and hit the roof on his side./p
p"Jean?!" he gasped out./p
p"Jean!" Marco, somewhere to the side, wailed./p
p"iNobody/i kills ianybody/i until we get answers," he growled. "Until we get the itruth/i! Annie's a titan, and she tried to kill us- it isn't unthinkable that you're with her. It's actually pretty likely, now that I think about it."/p
pI felt my temper rage up within me. "Pick a side, Jean!" I snapped. "This isn't a battle where you have the iluxury/i of waiting for any sort of certainty to act!"/p
pAnd then Reiner had materialized behind him, blade drawn back./p
p"Sorry, Jean," he murmured, with the Soldier's last feeble ounce of control. "You've already condemned us, which leaves me no choice."/p
pArlert was up before any of us could react, deflecting Reiner's blades just as they were about to slip into Jean's back. Gasping with exertion, he drove at the Warrior; although he was easily blocked, the attack forced Reiner back a footstep. Jean spun away from me to see what was going on; I aimed, not allowing myself to think, for his his neck./p
p"Armin!" the brunette called. It was incredibly obvious, to the both of us, that Armin should not be trying to engage Reiner; his blades bounced off the much larger boy's, and he could barely dodge the counterattacks. iBut... he engaged Reiner... for Jean's sake.../i The fact confused me. Arlert was supposed to care only about himself and his two friends; Jean wasn't so strategically important to justify taking such risks to keep him alive./p
p
iSo... why...?/i
/p
pForcing the fog of confusion to dissipate, I raised my blade another fraction of an inch, then brought it down on Jean's exposed neck. There was a flash of movement; a flash of blood./p
pAnd a scream./p
pI blinked in surprise, shocked to find my blade embedded halfway in Marco's shoulder. Both of his were out and, even as I stared, he drove them both into my stomach with a cry that was half defiance and half agony. I felt my face twist with pain and anger; forced my blade down another inch and felt his clavicle snap beneath the pressure./p
p"Marco!" Jean wailed, spinning and diving at me; the force of his attack was enough to rip me free of Marco, who stumbled briefly and then slumped, releasing his blades so that they came away with me. I raised my arm to block Jean, blood spattering his agonized face as he sliced open my forearm./p
p
iWhy are we losing...?/i
/p
p
iBecause... I'm still not fighting./i
/p
pI wasn't; I didn't want to; I icouldn't/i. Not against Jean and Marco. That was why Armin seemed willing to risk himself for their sake- they were his plan for beating us, or at least stalling us./p
piWhy?!/i I wailed silently. iWhy must you toy with lives and emotions... so easily?!/i/p
pLeaping up, I dodged Jean's next flailing attack. Spinning sideways, I caught the side of his head with the tip of my blade, shearing off the top of his ear and opening a thin gash along his temple. Gasping in surprise, he clutched at the wound, but fell perfectly still when my blade slipped just an inch into the skin of his back./p
piI... have to kill him.../i I flexed my left hand, nearly regenerated, and pulled Marco's blades belatedly from my stomach. Bracing myself, I drove the blade in deeper; heard him begin to scream.../p
p... and then suddenly, the whole world was upside down./p
pI felt a brief flare of pain, but it wasn't as much as someone might expect. As it was, Armin had missed his mark just slightly; perhaps Reiner had distracted him, or perhaps he hadn't meant to finish me. Regardless, my head ididn't/i come clean off, but did swing awkwardly to the side as my neck was cut halfway through. I felt hot blood spurt up; heard Jean's screaming change pitch. Staggering slightly, blades falling from my hands, I dropped onto my knees and reached up; it took a concentrated effort to control my violently shaking limbs, but I managed to get a good grip on my head, setting it back on my raggedly torn neck so that the healing could begin./p
pI took a moment, on my knees, to heal and catch my breath. Then I turned, slowly assessing the situation. Reiner was holding a slightly squirming Armin; his eyes were on me, awaiting my order. Jean was crouched over Marco, pressing desperately at the bleeding gash on his shoulder. The freckled boy was conscious, but I doubted he would be able to fight, even once Jean managed to get his wound wrapped up. iIf he even survives.../i I added grimly. The blood loss looked tremendous, perhaps more than a human could withstand. When I was fairly certain that my neck wouldn't tear apart the second I moved, I rose; faced Armin./p
p"What now?" I asked, tiredly. "Was this part of your plan?"/p
p"Jean! Marco!" he called, ignoring my question. "Get up the Wall. I appreciate what you've done up until now, but you'll be killed if you stay. I can handle things from here."/p
p"You can 'handle things?!'" Jean demanded. "What the ifuck/i, man?! You're gonna idie/i if we leave you alone with these two!"/p
pHe should die, left alone with us... but I had learned not to underestimate Armin Arlert. If he said he could handle things... I was inclined to believe that he could, despite appearances./p
p"Trust me, Jean. Go join Mikasa and the others, like we talked about. I'll need you alive after we win this battle- as we are well on our way to doing."/p
pJean, with visible reluctance, nodded; he helped Marco up, then, and took off unsteadily. I briefly considered running them down and killing them both, but dismissed it as unnecessary./p
p"What is your plan, Armin Arlert?"/p
pHe didn't even look uncomfortable, restrained by Reiner's muscular arms. "Have Reiner Shift, Bertholdt. I won't interfere."/p
pI felt surprise flair up in me. "Reiner... have him Shift? Are you telling me to go ahead and have him knock down Wall Rose?"/p
p"That's exactly what I'm saying," Armin said calmly. "Neither of our plans can advance until Reiner Shifts."/p
pi... Is he bluffing...?/i Armin Arlert never bluffed, though. iWhy would he even...? He doesn't have a Shifter on his side. As soon as Reiner transforms, he's done for- he can't possibly counter the Armored Titan./i/p
p"If... Reiner transforms, Wall Rose will be breached."/p
p"Correct."/p
p"And if Wall Rose is breached, Trost will be lost."/p
p"Correct again."/p
p"And... by your own admission..." I swallowed nervously, although my throat shifted unnaturally as I did so, "... if Trost falls, you'll join us... willingly."/p
pArmin Arlert smiled. "Yes. By my own admission."/p
pI couldn't figure out what he was getting at- it couldn't be that straightforward. But I also couldn't see any possible disadvantage to Reiner transforming. i"Neither of our plans... can advance..."/i Of everything Armin Arlert had said, that seemed to be the truth; we certainly did seem to be at a stalemate at the moment./p
p"Alright. I'll play along."/p
pReiner dropped Armin; the small boy hit the ground, gasping slightly, and I suddenly realized how close to his physical limit he really was. But he managed to stand; to face Reiner./p
p"Go on," I said, and my Warrior nodded briskly. Then he sunk his teeth into his hand, blood spurting out around the wound; electricity crackling down from the sky./p
pAnd then Reiner began to scream./p
pI felt my whole body stiffen at the sound; I heard the brief creaking of titan bones hidden in the steam, and then a tremendous crash. Shielding my face from the heat, I braced myself. Something was wrong- terribly wrong. I wondered what order I had given, if not the order for Reiner to Shift./p
pAnd then the smoke cleared. I saw, much to my alarm, a very human Reiner curled amidst several cracked titan bones and fast-dissolving bits of flesh, none of which had successfully attached to his body. With a glance at Armin, seeing he hadn't moved, I ran to my friend's side and dropped down next to him./p
p"R-Reiner...! Reiner, what happened?!"/p
p"Sorry... Bertl..." he gasped out softly, then grit his teeth. "I... don't know..."/p
pI reached forward and touched his shoulder; it felt feverish, alarmingly hot, even for a Shifter. As I watched he wretched slightly, blood and a greenish bile spattering the ground. Then I spun, blades sliding from their sheaths as I stalked toward Armin Arlert, who still hadn't moved an inch./p
p"What did you ido/i?!" I demanded, crossing my blades at his neck. The small blonde didn't flinch, but raised his head slightly higher, exposing even more of his tender throat./p
p"It's a poison I developed, back in Shiganshina," he said softly. "I had the benefit of Grisha Jaeger's notes, remember, iand/i a Shifter to experiment on. I know Shifter biology inside and out. This particular compound is triggered by an attempted Shift. It systematically raises the victim's temperature, through massive releases of pyruvate, far above what is survivable... even for a Shifter. Your connective tissues literally start to boil as your muscles dissolve- even Shifter proteins begin to denature in this sort of heat."/p
p"When would you have-?!" I began, but then hit upon it. "The party last night...!"/p
p"Exactly," he whispered. "One of Reiner's personas would certainly have caught me poisoning his drink... but the the other, the one that was dominant during the graduation ceremony and the celebration afterwards... didn't."/p
pI felt tears prick at my eyes, but blinked them away. "You... scum...!" was all I could gasp out, pressing harder with my blades. "I'll kill you... I'll kill you!"/p
p"And if you do, you'll never know how to make the antidote."/p
pThat got my attention; snapped me from my rage-induced haze. "What?"/p
p"The antidote," Armin repeated calmly. "I tested this poison on Eren- do you really think I would risk that if I didn't have an antidote? And I'm more than willing to give it to you, if you only do exactly what I say."/p
p"Don't do it, Bertl...!" Reiner's voice cut in before I could reply. "It's not worth the Mission...! Don't cave to him...! I can beat this...!"/p
pI looked over, my eyes aching with tears. Reiner had gotten to his feet, although he looked anything but well. His eyes were gleaming, the old Warrior determination burning as brightly as the fever. I felt my whole body rebel as I watched him struggle, for a moment, to stay on his feet./p
p"I don't care how strong he is- he has an hour or so left," Armin said calmly. "Make your decision quickly, Bertholdt. I don't want him to die; I want everyone to survive this battle. But more than that, I need to win this battle. Don't make me kill him to do it."/p
pI closed my eyes briefly; bit my lip, feeling my insides twist into knots as I considered it. iDamn... /idamni...! Armin Arlert... he has me... damnit, he has me...!/i/p
p"What do you want me to do, Armin?"/p
pHis face tried to split in a grin of triumph, but the expression faltered for a moment and soured. I heard Reiner give a soft objection, but ignored him; we could always kill Armin Arlert after we had gotten the antidote. And besides that rationalization, I couldn't bear to lose Reiner, regardless of his mental state or the way the Soldier often pushed me away./p
p"We're going to rendezvous with Annie," the Shiganshinan boy announced, "and then we'll meet up with Eren. So first we have to make it to Wall Rose."/p
pi"Make it," he says.../i I thought grimly. iHe's nearing exhaustion... Reiner is crippled by his poison... and I.../i Looking around, I took in the hoard of Common Titans encircling our rooftop. It would have been easy to forget about them, in the midst of all the drama, but to do so would have cost all our lives. The majority of the surviving soldiers were scaling the Wall, in accordance with Armin's orders; when I strained, I could just make out Erwin Smith at their head, with Jean beside him./p
p"Erwin knows the importance of obeying my orders," Armin said softly, an odd smile on his face. "Erwin knows." Then he gave himself a shake, motioning to me. "Let's go."/p
pNodding slightly, I turned back to Reiner; he looked wretched, having slumped back to his knees. But he struggled to his feet when he noticed that I was watching him, his face a mask of bravery./p
p"Let's go, Bertl. Annie will know what to do."/p
pI felt my heart swell with affection and fear; I couldn't stand to lose him, my brave and powerful Warrior. iI won't lose him.../i I told myself firmly. iHe's... the one thing I don't have to give up. He and Annie... we'll face this together, and we'll win. We'll all get back home, together./i/p
p
iIf I have to play along with Armin Arlert to reach that end, then so be it./i
/p
pReiner took off unsteadily from the rooftop; I shadowed him closely, terrified that he would falter and fall prey to a Common. Armin followed us, seeming entirely relaxed. I considered, briefly, trying to overpower him; I was certain that I could. But I was also certain that pain and death meant nothing to him; I could kill him in the slowest and most painful of ways known to man, fifty times over, and I was certain that he wouldn't crack./p
pi"l don't want him to die; I want everyone to survive this battle."/i Despite it all, I believed that; he, like me, had no taste for meaningless death or suffering. Everything he was doing, he saw as necessary to his own victory, which was something that he would sacrifice anything to achieve. And he wanted that victory not only for himself, but more for his two friends./p
pI couldn't bring myself to hate him, even in that moment. We were too alike./p
pWe reached the Wall, miracle of miracles, without incident. Reiner collapsed against the stone, his whole body trembling as he laid flat against it. His face was flushed, and he let his eyes close for a moment as he tried desperately to catch his breath. I moved to his side; pressed my body gently against his. It was as hot as if he had emerged from the Armored Titan seconds ago./p
p"Bertholdt." Armin's voice was surprisingly gentle. "Listen closely to me, now. You must have a way to call Annie out of wherever she's hiding, right? I need you to do that for me. Be as upfront with her as you'd like- I'm not foolish enough to think I can get you to lie convincingly to her. Then we'll discuss the terms of your surrender- despite what you might think right now, there are several points I'm willing to negotiate on."/p
p"Don't do it, Bertl...!" Reiner's voice rasped in his throat, and I could see him weakening minute to minute./p
p
iLess... than an hour.../i
/p
p"I... won't promise anything," I murmured, "but we'll hear you out."/p
pArmin nodded, although his expression was anything but triumphant- it seemed, for an instant, to be troubled. But that expression vanished so quickly that I couldn't be sure I had seen it./p
p"Good. Let's go, then."/p
pThere were a few stragglers still limping their way up Wall Rose; they acknowledged us, and we them. Then we were at the top, hopping up at the edge of a massive gathering of soldiers. I was mildly surprised by how many had actually survived, although most were limping or bleeding or wailing with trauma. I saw Connie and Sasha, glued to one another; I spotted Jean, speaking to Commander Erwin Smith, near the head of the group, and with Marco resting on the ground just behind him. And there was Mikasa, as well, her eyes fixed on us./p
p"Well?" Armin queried, looking to me. I shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot, wondering what I should do. Reiner had sunk to his knees again, doubled over slightly as he wheezed./p
p"... Alright."/p
pWaiting for Reiner to get to his feet, I took off down Rose at a loping trot. I noticed that, even at such a reasonable pace, Armin was having trouble keeping up- more trouble, even, than Reiner. But his face was grim and determined, and he reminded me, just for a moment, of my Warrior./p
p"Alright..." I said softly, skidding to a halt some distance from the other soldiers. "The original plan was for Annie to hide until after the battle, so we actually don't have a way of getting in contact with her. But this was the section of the Wall she was going to hide on, so-"/p
p"Annie's too smart for that," Armin scoffed, cutting me off. "You have to have some sort of emergency signal for summoning her. You already Shifted, in order to kick the Wall in; you can't do it again today- according to Grisha's notes, a crippling weakness for all Colossal Class Shifters. As capable as the both of you are, even excluding Reiner's Shifting, you had to have a fail-safe to summon the Female Titan, should you need her."/p
pI flinched. Was it impossible to pull ianything/i, even the simplest of lies, over on Armin Arlert? Apparently the answer was a resounding yes./p
p"You're only wasting what little time Reiner has left."/p
p"She gave me this," the reminder made me admit in a rush. After a moment of rustling around in my pockets, I produced the signal gun. "I don't know what it'll do, but she said to use it in an emergency, if we needed her."/p
pArmin took the small device from me; examined it. "Just like Annie," he murmured, and then fired the gun without further warning. I flinched at the sound, then watched as a shimmering white trail of smoke ascended into the sky. Armin too watched, his eyes clouded slightly. I glanced furtively over at the soldiers; some had noticed the strange signal, but most were too preoccupied. Then, within moments, the signal had blended into the wispy clouds, as if it had never been there./p
p"Now we wait..."/p
pIt wasn't quite the truth that I didn't know what the signal would do. Annie had told me to use it if we were in mortal danger; that she would come for us. I didn't think I was wrong when I assumed that she would be coming for us in her titan form. I hoped that she wouldn't jump to any conclusions and just speak to us calmly. I doubted that she would give up Reiner voluntarily, but if he itold/i her to sacrifice him... I wasn't sure how she would react./p
piWe've /igoti to play along with Armin... just until we get the antidote...! When Reiner can Shift again... we can regroup at any time. As long as all of us survive, we can try again... and Armin Arlert can only stop us so many times./i I glanced over at the boy; he was shaking almost as hard as Reiner was, his shoulder wound still oozing black blood. But his eyes were bright; I couldn't understand how he was still functioning so well. iBut the important thing is that he has limits... If this battle stretches on for much longer... he'll drop dead from sheer exhaustion./i/p
pThe lightning bolt was right on cue; Armin didn't seem surprised. But then a chorus of wails arose from the huddled soldiers, and that made the small blonde stiffen and stand./p
p"Shit... if they panic... ishit/i...!"/p
pThen he was running; I jumped to my feet, and Reiner faltered as he tried to do the same. "Stay here!" I called to him, as I pursued our small enemy; it would do no good for him to waste his flagging strength./p
pArmin's panicked voice rang in my ears as I caught up to him, and it occurred to me suddenly that he was slipping. Of course the surviving soldiers would panic when the Female Titan appeared; the fact that Armin had overlooked something so basic was a clear indication that his mind was as weary as his body./p
p"Everyone... everyone get farther down the Wall!" he was shouting, as he approached the crowd. Jean and Mikasa were side-by-side as they raced from the crowd to meet him, although Jean recoiled visibly at the sight of me. Armin skidded to a halt, but his legs buckled suddenly and he fell, shredding his slacks and skinning both his knees on the stone of Wall Rose./p
p"Armin!" Mikasa cried out, but he waved her off as she began to kneel beside him; he got back to his feet on his own./p
p"G-Gather the soldiers...!" he gasped out. "Tell... Jean, tell Erwin to get his men as far away from here as possible, as quickly as possible! The Female Titan is coming back!"/p
p"What?!" Jean yelped, but Mikasa grabbed his shoulder and shoved him back toward the soldiers./p
p"Go," she ordered. "Go!" Not stopping to see if he had obeyed- which he did -she turned back to Armin. "Armin, I need to know- where is Eren?"/p
p"Now is not the time!" he snapped, but to my surprise Mikasa didn't flinch./p
p"You say he's safe; if he's safe, why isn't he here? Why isn't he fighting?"/p
p"Mikasa, please!" Armin half-wailed. "You can flay me alive when this is over, but now is inot/i the time!"/p
p"Why would I want to flay you?" Mikasa asked, her eyes suddenly sparking with fear and her voice rising. "Armin, where is Eren?! What's happened?! Please, Armin, you've got to tell me! Eren's alright, isn't he?!"/p
pArmin cursed suddenly, shoving her in the chest; as he did so, however, his whole body spasmed and he collapsed like a stringless puppet. I recoiled in surprise and horror as he tried to get up... and this time, he failed. Mikasa was instantly beside him, her hands hovering frantically./p
p"Oh Walls, Armin, what have you done to yourself...?!"/p
pThen Annie's skinless hand appeared over the edge of the Wall. Somehow Armin managed to bolt to his feet, his speed defying the weakness that was now laid bare to Mikasa and I. The whole of the army erupted in a chorus of wails and cries./p
p"Annie..." Armin murmured, and for a moment I caught a glimmer of affection in his gaze. "Bertholdt, remember what's at stake, now... don't misstep."/p
p"Armin... you seem really chummy with these guys..." Mikasa whispered, and Armin shot her a baleful look./p
p"Reiner is in a little fix that he needs my help to get out of, so Bertholdt here is temporarily under my control." He glanced over to the spot where Annie was pulling herself farther up onto the Wall./p
p"Annie!" I called suddenly, and Armin bristled beside me. "This way!" I didn't want her finding Reiner before I had spoken to her- he would tell her to let him die, and she would be inclined to comply... for the sake of the Mission./p
p"Get everyone farther down the Wall," Armin told Mikasa. "Keep them from panicking- the Female Titan won't attack them."/p
pMikasa hesitated, but nodded shortly and took off back toward the army. She stopped, however, crying out an objection as three soldiers broke away and approached us. One of them was limping badly./p
p"Levi, stop!" Commander Erwin Smith roared; Levi paid him no mind, picking up the pace despite his obviously wounded leg. There was blood soaking every inch of him, making it impossible to tell how much belonged to him and how much belonged to others. He had one eye closed, although that might have been due to the nasty cut pouring out blood just above it. The girl beside him was in similar shape, although she sported no limp and had only a spotty coating of blood./p
p"What the fuck is this, Arlert?!" Corporal Levi roared, reaching forward and grabbing Armin by the collar, hoisting him up off the ground. He staggered slightly; the girl, wordlessly, supported him. "I have half a mind to throw you off Wall Rose, you fucking little brat!"/p
p"Levi!" Erwin said again, grabbing his subordinate's shoulder. I glanced back to see that Annie had gotten herself fully onto the Wall, and was watching us intently./p
p"My men are idead/i because of you!" Levi continued, apparently oblivious to all else. "Do you know how many of my men are dead because of you, you little shit?!"/p
pArmin grasped Levi's wrist surprisingly calmly, lifting his body so that he could breathe just slightly. "Sacrifices... are necessary... Corporal Levi..." he gasped out, and Levi flung him violently to the ground. Armin Arlert's body bounced slightly, his head cracking against the stone and his eyes flying wide for an instant. Then they slipped shut, and he was still./p
pI choked slightly; the girl beside Levi whimpered, and Erwin's voice rose in a chastisement. But most startling of all was the reaction of the Female Titan- Annie. /p
pShe shrieked./p
pI felt the Wall tremble with her footsteps as she raced toward us; Corporal Levi stiffened, a strange smile coming to his face./p
p"That's right, you skinless bitch..." he murmured. "Come on. I'll kill you. I'll cut out your weak spot... I'll flay you."/p
piWeak spot...?/i Then Levi didn't even know that Annie was a Shifter. Erwin's eyes were wild with panic./p
p"Levi, you're injured! I order to you to return to-!"/p
p"You 'order me?!'" Levi snarled, rounding on him. "Don't make me laugh, Old Man! This is as much your fault as it is Arlert's!" Erwin flinched as though struck, and Levi pushed off the girl beside him. "Come on, Petra. For the others, let's take that giant bitch down."/p
p"Yes, Corporal." Her voice was frail but determined; there were tears cutting tracks through the blood on her cheeks, and I could only watch as they raced to intercept Annie./p
p"Levi! Petra!" Erwin roared again, but then drew back and cursed violently. He looked briefly at me, seemed to decide that I was unimportant, and then crouched beside Armin Arlert. I felt my heart thump erratically; if Armin was dead, the Mission could proceed... but Reiner would die./p
p"Alive..." Erwin murmured, after a moment, and I felt relief crash over me. "Thank fate... Levi... you can be so impulsive..."/p
p"When will he regain consciousness?" I asked breathily, and Erwin shot me a strange glance. iReiner... has less than an hour.../i/p
p"That depends entirely on how motivated he is to regain consciousness," the Commander of the Survey Corps said, and then laughed softly. "So it'll probably be a matter of minutes, knowing him."/p
pA sudden shriek from Annie made me look up; I had thought that she would be able to deal with Levi and his companion quickly, seeing as Humanity's Strongest looked half-dead already. But I was surprised to see her reeling backwards, hands moving to her face as her eyes were both gouged out by two twirling bullets. Levi landed on her left, Petra on her right, and they sprang again. The top of the Wall was narrow, I realized with a start; Annie had very little room to maneuver. Even as I watched, one of her feet slipped off the side and she staggered, the falter allowing Levi to dart in and slice deep into her leg./p
pAnnie was losing./p
p"Annie!" I wailed, turning and sprinting toward the fight; I half expected Erwin to give chase, but he stayed with Armin Arlert. I was cut off, however, by another tall, muscular Survey Corpsman; wondered, fleetingly, how he could even see through his messy shock of dirty blonde hair. He was as bloodied and battered as the rest of the soldiers, with a ragged bite mark out of his fluttering cape./p
p"Levi's just lost the better part of his squad," he informed me calmly. "I won't let the likes of you bother him right now."/p
pAnother shriek from Annie set my heart pounding and my muscles singing with adrenaline. "I'll just have to go through you, then."/p
pThe man smirked; I tried to identify him, wondering if he was someone I should be worried about fighting. But there didn't seem to be a choice, regardless, and so I drew my blades./p
pThe first exchange was brief- we had very limited use of our Gear, considering the flat top of the Wall that was our battlefield. But in the space of a heartbeat, I had realized that this shaggy soldier was not one to be taken lightly. I felt my neck begin to steam as it healed, and thanked Rose that it had been such a clean cut. Then I spun, surprised to see the man flying at me, his face hard with determination. I ducked, but he twisted and grabbed my shoulder, flinging me down flat on my back. I scrambled out of the way as he kicked for me, and rolling and bouncing back onto my feet./p
pInstantly the Survey Corpsman charged; I dug my feet into the Wall beneath me, feeling a desperate flood of adrenaline as Annie screamed again. I ducked beneath the man's blades, lashing out with one foot and sweeping his feet out from beneath him. He hit the ground and rolled, tucking one shoulder in and not even faltering before bouncing onto his feet and coming at me again. This time I met his blades head on, with a deafening clang of metal. I realized too late that he was far stronger than me, in terms of sheer muscle, and I was forced to roll into a backwards summersault to avoid being sliced clean in half./p
pThen he was upon me, before I could get my feet under me again. I lashed out desperately, vaguely aware of my blade sinking into something soft as he pinned me to the Wall. I heard him scream and falter for a moment, and used the opening to scramble out from underneath him. But then he was coming at me yet again, seemingly without regard for the fact that he now only had one eye. /p
pI dodged his first strike, a screech from Annie making me attempt to slip around him; it cost me, as I wasn't able to block his blade before it sank deep into my stomach. The Survey Corpsman grabbed my shoulder, his huge hand tightening and snapping the joint with such little effort that my amazement almost overrode the pain completely. One of my blades clattered to the ground as my hand went slack, useless at my side./p
p"I thought I told you- I won't let you interfere with Levi right now."/p
pI could see, behind him, that Levi was carving a hateful path through Annie's very flesh. She had hardened her neck, yes, but she couldn't keep up with the speed of his attacks to harden her limbs. As her muscles were shredded, she began to falter- I saw her slip; heard her scream./p
pI tried to wrench myself free, but the Survey Corpsman held me tightly; I let out a choked cry as he wrenched my broken body slightly, and my other blade clattered from my hand. Levi and Petra swarmed up around the Female Titan, slicing deep into her sides and chest and shoulders as she staggered. /p
pAnd then Annie was falling./p
pShe grabbed desperately for the Wall's edge, but Levi slashed her fingers off at the second knuckle. Then I could only watch her titan face, twisted in a strangely human expression of shock and fear, as she fell, plummeting off Wall Rose and toward the waiting, rabid hoard of Common Titans below./p
pI saw her mouth stretch wide in a scream; I cried out her name./p
pBut one sound drowned out both of us./p
p"Annie!"/p
pArmin Arlert's shriek rang in my ears, so loudly that I couldn't even hear my own voice raised in unison. He surged past me, although Commander Erwin Smith caught hold of his 3D Gear harness before he could fling himself off the edge of Rose after the Female Titan, as he seemed fully prepared to do. His face was a horrible mess of terror and pain, like I knew mine was, as he watched her fall./p
pAnd then the Female Titan hit the ground. For an instant, the Commons parted, and then fell upon her in a ravenous frenzy of cannibalism. Within moments, her sheiks had faded to nothing, and there was silence except for the tearing of flesh and gnashing of teeth./p
pAnd then Armin Arlert let out a broken sob- just one, in the silence, as he drew back from the edge of the Wall, shrugging his shoulders to brush Erwin away./p
p"Mike, I need this one alive for a bit longer," he told the Survey Corpsman I had been fighting. His voice was calm, and when he looked up his face was a mask of unruffled confidence. "Bertholdt, there is still the matter of Reiner. I'd like to address it now."/p
pI found myself nodding shakily; how could I do anything else? My opponent drove his blade in deeper for a moment, and I gagged./p
p"Erwin?"/p
pThe Commander of the Survey Corps waved his hand. "Let him go, Mike."/p
pMike didn't look happy about it, but he pulled his blade from my abdomen with an unnatural squelch; it was emotional fatigue and shock as much as anything that sent me crashing to the ground. As I pushed myself up with my good hand, I spotted Corporal Levi, collapsed some ways down the wall with that girl, Petra, crouched at his side. I wondered briefly if he was dead, but then dismissed the notion. iThat demon... can't be killed.../i/p
p"Come on, Bertholdt." Armin's voice was surprisingly gentle. "I have one more task for you before I tell you the antidote."/p
pI struggled to my feet, and was surprised to realize that my wounds iweren't/i healing, although they obviously weren't killing me, either. iHeh... I've reached... my limit.../i/p
p
iLike Reiner... and Annie.../i
/p
p
i... Like... Armin.../i
/p
pI followed Armin Arlert across the Wall; Mikasa called out to him, but he waved her off. Jean jogged up beside us for a moment, but Armin only gave him short instructions regarding keeping everyone as calm as he could; we had soon left him behind. I could hear Armin's ragged breathing./p
pAnd then Reiner came into sight./p
pHe had curled up in a slightly damaged portion of the Wall, huddled like a child in the shadow of the bricks. I ran to him; could feel the heat rolling off him in waves, before I was five feet from him./p
p"Bertholdt." I could tell he couldn't see me; his hands sought me, and I clutched them tightly despite the way they burned me. His clouded eyes were streaming, although I couldn't tell if they were true tears or just a watering caused by the slow burning of his body./p
pI spun, my eyes desperately wide. "Armin, please!" I gasped out. "I'll do anything, just... quickly, please!"/p
pI was surprised to see that Armin was keeping his distance; there was a small smile on his face, but his eyes were dark and swimming./p
p"I... don't need anything else from you Bertholdt."/p
pI didn't comprehend his words. "What?! Then tell me the antidote, quickly! Please!"/p
pThere had been a suspicion in the back of my mind; I hadn't wanted to consider it, even for a moment./p
p"There is no antidote, Bertholdt."/p
pI choked softly on what I knew was the truth. "But... but you tested it on Eren!" I objected frantically. "You wouldn't have risked that without an antidote!"/p
p"I never tested it," he said, his voice thin and strained. "This was all a gamble, Bertholdt, from the very beginning- the gamble that would win or lose the Battle of Trost. If I couldn't neutralize the Armored Titan, we stood no chance. The rest... was all improvisation."/p
pI felt rage-flavored bile rise in my throat. "You... how could you do this?!" I shrieked at last, and felt Reiner wince. "Not only did you... killing is one thing- forgivable, in this cruel world -but to... to play with us like that?! To lead us on- to give us hope, just to rip it away?!"/p
pArmin looked, for a moment, genuinely pained. "The battle was not yet won. I needed to have you at my disposal, should I need you. I also couldn't risk the both of you turning against me while Reiner was still well enough to fight."/p
pI tried to scream at him, but I found that my anger was draining unexpectedly from me, sucked away by my despair. And then I could only begin to sob- dryly, unable to summon tears. Reiner's body was beginning to steam, and I hugged him despite the physical and emotional pain it caused me./p
p"Bertholdt... can we still go home...?" His voice was a croaking whisper, and I held him tighter to my chest. In that moment, I wanted him at my side so badly that my own insides felt like they were boiling. I didn't even care if he was the Soldier or my Warrior./p
pI just needed Reiner to stand with me./p
p"Yes..." I forced myself to murmur, pressing my lips close to his feverish ear. "You're just going to get there a bit before me."/p
pHe died there in my arms; I felt him take his last shuddering breath under his killer's watchful gaze. And even then his body only grew hotter and hotter, until I was eventually forced to recoil as it dissolved into nothing like a titan's corpse./p
pAnd then I stood to face Armin Arlert./p
pIn that moment, I hated him. I hated him with a deep loathing that I hadn't thought myself capable of. /p
p"I'll kill you someday."/p
pHe smiled slightly. "But not today."/p
pI felt my lips curl up. "No. Not today."/p
p"Go," he told me, and then looked away. "Annie and I... promised... that the winner of this battle would look after the loser. Letting you live will be my atonement... for not being able to keep that promise to her."/p
p"If you let me go now, I will come back. I'll dismantle your plans and dreams until you're weeping, and then I'll kill you." I felt the need to warn him./p
pHis smile widened. "I deserve no less."/p
pAnd then, with that understanding, the understanding that I would return for his happiness and his head, I accepted Armin Arlert's mercy and ran. I left behind the world of humans that I had become so fond of, along with my friends' remains./p