Chapter 10
Austin's POV
It's been two weeks and I still haven't told Ally. I want to tell her but I either don't know how to or Dez keeps me from doing it. He says that I'll just loose her. But I'm afraid that if I don't tell her; I'll lose her anyway. And she seems happy. And I feel awful.
She keeps giving me these smiles, holding my hand, saying sweet things. It's killing me.
"What's wrong with you today?"
I look over at her and smile. "Nothing, just daydreaming too much I guess."
She nods and lays her head on my chest. We were sitting on my back porch swing. Mom and Dad were gone again, so we were alone. I grab her hand and start fumbling with it.
"Ally, we need to talk about something."
"Okay, what is it?" She asks.
"Do you remember a few weeks ago when-"
"Hey Austin!"
Dez and Trish busted through the back door, smiling like idiots.
I wanted to punch them. I have to find a way to tell her.
"Hey guys," Ally said, sitting up. "Whatcha up to?"
"Nothing really, we just thought it would be a fine day to have a picnic." Trish says. She held up a basket which I was guessing was full of food.
Ally stands up from the swing. "That's sounds awesome. Let's go to the park."
Her and Trish start walking back into the house. Ally turns around. "You guys coming?"
I nod. "Yeah, you guys go ahead."
She smiles and gives me a quick kiss on the check. Then they run off. Dez and I slowly follow behind them.
"You haven't told her have you?" Dez asks.
"Does it look like I've told her?" I say, quite angry.
"Well good."
"Dez I can't do this anymore. The longer I hide it the worse it's going to be when she finds out." I say. "I'm going to tell her soon."
He shrugs. "I hope you know what you're doing."
"I do."
I don't.
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That night when we were having a picnic, that one guy came running over to us. He announced that Kendall Mason will be having another big party.
"Why does that guy have so many parties?" I asked.
"He is rich and he has a nice house. Why not throw parties?" Trish explains.
I shrug understanding.
The party was set for Thursday night, because Friday we wouldn't be going to school for some reason. I don't remember.
All of us were going; Ally, Trish, Dez and me. This was going to be fun. I was planning on telling Ally around Friday. But then I decided to tell her in public…so she wouldn't freak out as much. I feel bad for saying that.
It was the night of Kendall Mason's party and the two of us were standing near the back of the living room. She didn't want to dance. I tried making her but she was going to have a panic attack so I left the thought alone. The party was continuing around us.
She was playing with my right hand.
"Ally,"
She looks up at me, smiling. "Yes,"
"I want to tell you something. Important."
She looks worried for a second. "Now?"
I nod.
"Okay I'm ready."
I look around the room. "Let's go somewhere a little bit more private. Alright?"
She nods and takes my hand.
My head was hurting and my stomach was doing front flips. I started to lead her out the back door but someone calls my name.
"Austin,"
Shit, it was Lydia. "Hey Lydia, we have to go. I'll see you later." I say nicely.
"No," She was mad. "We need to talk. Listen, I don't appreciate you just le-"
"Lydia, can we please talk later. Ally and I have to go somewhere."
I start pulling Ally towards the door. She doesn't move. I look back at her.
"Ally," It came out more like a whine.
"No, listen to Lydia. Don't be rude." She says.
Before I could protest Lydia began talking.
"Alright, Austin, I don't appreciate you just leaving that night. I thought you really liked me. But all you wanted was sex…" She continued on blabbing.
I look at Ally. She stares at the ground for a second, and then rips her hand from mine.
"Hey Lydia," She says.
"Yeah?"
"When did this happen?"
"Kendall Mason's last party," Lydia answered.
Ally looked at me then ran off. I chased after her; leaving a stunned Lydia alone.
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I couldn't find her anywhere. She wasn't in any of the bathroom, I checked all the room. She was nowhere. I finally ran into Trish. She looked angry.
"What the fuck did you do to Ally?!" She yelled.
"Where is she?" I questioned.
"Answer my question." She demanded.
I didn't' have time for this. "Just tell me where the fuck Ally went!" I didn't like raising my voice but that's all I could do at this point.
She backed up a couple steps. "She went upstairs." She was startled.
I ran up the stairs. I should've known; Ally would never walk home in the dark. I searched every room on the second floor. She wasn't there. Did Trish lie to me? Before I turned back downstairs, I notice the last door on the left. I ran down and opened it. The room was a dining area. I had to let my eyes adjust to the low light before I saw her in the last chair, head in hands. I start making my way to her.
"Ally,"
"Go away."
"Ally please, just le-"
"Austin, I said go away."
I stepped closer. She must have heard my footstep because her head popped up quick. Her eyes were red and her face was wet. I kneeled down in front of her.
"Can you let me explain?"
"Explain what Austin?!" She screamed. "Explain how you cheated on me with someone, and then the next day act like nothing happened. What did I do to you?" Fresh tears slide down her face. I reached out to wipe them away but she moved from my touch. A pang of heart went through me.
"Ally, you never did anything to me. I-"
"Then why did you do it?!"
"I was drunk!" I yelled.
She jumped.
Damn, damn it. I'm doing this wrong. She's going to hate me.
"It's my fault." She said. She stood up, looking at me. "I'm not good enough for you. Am I?"
"Ally, tha-"
"Don't say my name." Her arms were crossed on her chest. She was looking down.
I swallowed. "I couldn't ask for a better person to be with then you." I said.
"Then why?" She demanded an answer.
"Dez and I got drunk, okay. Lydia has been bothering me since we met about hooking." I started walking towards her. She starts backing up to the wall. "She was all over me that night. She wouldn't stop touching me. She wouldn't stop begging. Honestly it was plain annoying. So I-I gave in."
She had her back against the wall. She was still looking at the ground. "I can't believe I trusted you. I liked you. I lo-" She stops herself.
"You can still trust me."
She laughs bitterly. "You're stupid." She says. "You're stupid. You're stupid. You're stupid." She repeats. She starts hitting my chest with her small fists. She was still crying.
I grab her face and make her look at me. She tries to turn away but I keep her still.
"You can call me stupid, you can hit me. But I still…" My words get caught in my throat. I swallow and look her dead in the eyes. Her eyes were wide and watery. "I love you. I love you."
"No, no, no." She shakes her head, closing her eyes. "Don't say that. You don't mean it."
"Yes I do! I've never told anybody that I love them. You're the only person that makes me feel…crazy, insane, enchanted, in love!" I yell. "I love you. I love you. I love you." I repeat it over and over as she breaks down crying again, shaking her head. "Please, just trust me. I love you." I whisper.
She stops crying. We were both breathing heavy; me from screaming, her from losing her breath. She takes a deep breath and looks in my eyes.
"You're stupid." She smiles weakly.
"I know."
I wrap her in my arms tightly. I'm not going to let go ever again.
I'm sorry that the last two chapters sucked. But my next chapter will be filled with lots of drama with Uncle Jeff. So beware.
Please review and tell me what you think.
Thank you for reading...
This has been GabbyBustsYourButt